How to Get What You Want and Want What You Have: a Practical Guide to Personal Success

by John Gray

Consigue Lo Que Quieres, Valora Lo Que Tienes (Spanish Edition)

Genres: Self Help, Nonfiction, Psychology, Personal Growth, Spirituality, Personal Development, Relationships

310 pages, Paperback

Published January 1, 1999

About the author

Librarian Note: There is more than one author in the GoodReads database with this name.

John Gray is an American relationship counselor, lecturer, and author. In 1969, he began a nine-year association with Maharishi Mahesh Yogi before beginning his career as an author and personal relationship counselor. In 1992 he published the book Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus, which became a long-term best seller and formed the central theme of his subsequent books and career activities. His books have sold millions of copies.

Reviews

[Judith Symonds]

I am 38 years old and quite often other people notice that I am sensitive. I am now only coming to terms with this myself & John Gray helped me. What most people comment about Gray's work is the 'love tanks'. This makes alot of sense to me. Too much of a good thing can be, well just 'too much' and my mother always taught me 'everything in moderation'. Great! However, what I had never really understood is that people who wear their heart on their sleeve or 'sensitive people' absorb much more of the energy from around them. As a child, yes, I absorbed lots of negative energy. Then when I as in my late teens I learnt to block the energy. However, with no energy coming in or out, I became physically quite ill when I was around 34-35. Gray teachers how to discharge negative energy & I have been practicing it. It works really well for working through blocks. Also, great for parenting as I have two kids. One sensitive and one not.

I recommend this book if you are unhappy at work, if you are often told that you are sensitive and you don't yet know how to manage your power, if you always wondered what meditation was all about and didn't get it yet and most especially if you are the parent of a sensitive child. Enjoy

[Aisha B · Rating 5 out of 5]

Good book again reminded me of our Islam to appreciate everything we have. Loved that each page has the most important sentence highlighted so it reminds the reader of its importance. It's completed my read to the book "The Secret".

[Rosslyn · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a fabulous book for people that found themselves wanting more after reading Rhonda Byrnes "The Secret". John Gray teaches the reader how to be true to himself in order to achieve personal happiness.

[Marie Christine · Rating 1 out of 5]

Not my kind of thing. Same mumbo jumbo as 'the secret'.

[Ely Gocce di Rugiada · Rating 1 out of 5]

Un libro pieno di concetti che sono molto particolari e non inerenti alla psicologia. Un non saggio.

[Jurgen · Rating 1 out of 5]

This book really didn't work for me. The more I read, the more it seemed like completely hilarious BS. even got me laughing at some sections where I think you shouldn't be laughing. really making gun hands and shooting at plants. those poor innocent plants. what did they ever do to you.
off course if this book worked for you, great for you. I on the other hand do not belong to that group.

[Carol · Rating 3 out of 5]

I liked a few of the chapters that did not dwell on God. I learned that we all have several love tanks and when one is full it can change the way we interact with that person. We need to then switch to another love tank and try to keep them all in balance. An interesting concept.

[Riham]

FIRST THOUGHTS:
HOW BEAUTIFUL IS ISLAM!
the book s simply describing one of the main islamic concepts in our relation to ALLAH...
ALREDA!
the rest is to be posted ISA!

[Shreya Bahirat · Rating 2 out of 5]

"Wise men and women have pointed people of their generation in a direction that was helpful for that time. Now, we are at a time in history where we are ready to grow up. It's time when we can look directly within for the guidance we need to experience greater personal success."

I wish more people understood this and stopped shoving their noses into other people's business. The lessons and learnings that come from within appear at all the right times. This book is lengthy in that it gives measures for self development that are rather elaborate. I am afraid I was seeking something simpler. Anyhow, it validated certain self compassion measures that I've been practicing ever since I was a child, like writing a feeling letter followed by a response letter. This method sure helps regulate your emotions. For those like me, who grew up in chaos and have experienced rejection / neglect deeply - there are some helpful lessons here but nothing out of the ordinary. It all boils down to how you implement them in your life.

This book gave me a non-fiction saturation and I'm a non-fiction lover. Seems like I need to follow up with a fiction book to be able to enjoy reading again.

[Catherine · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book offers clear and concise guidance into how many of our blockages can be cleared.
As human beings we get blocked and emptied at different stages of our lives. be it in childhood teen years or in relationships, we all ge hurt at some stage.
In this book John Gray opens the mind body and spirit to the various options available to us, in order to create a balance in our lives and become healthy again.
Fear , trust, forgiveness and most of all unconditional LOVE are dealt with in a compassionate way.
After reading this book it prepared me for a major life changing experience, that rocked me to my very core.

This book simply allows you to learn the art of living in harmony, and balance. Realising the more you let go ---the more you attract in a better way.

Even if you only read one chapter you will feel more in tune with your self. One of the best Self Help books I have read ever.
Thank you John for your inspiration.

[Lisa · Rating 5 out of 5]

I'm doing the #READ100 a day challenge that Richard Denney mentioned about on his YouTube channel. It really is helping me get more reading done. I've read this book in three days and usually it takes me longer to read a book than that. This book was really easy for me to fly through though. It was understandable yet also very descriptive in the purpose of the soul message. I have read a few self help books this year and this one has got to be my favorite one. Even though I'm an agnostic and don't believe in the spiritual teachings in the book, John Gray lays it out for everyone; for every different religion so it's really easy to comprehend. I think I need a break from the self help books though......arggghhhh!!

[Charmin · Rating 3 out of 5]

HIGHLIGHTS:
1. Keep wishing for what you want (intention) and keep your heart open (acceptance).

2. Do your best. Surrender to god for the rest.

3. Personal success –the ability to get what you want and wanting what you have.

[Rebekah Sheppard · Rating 4 out of 5]

Excellent insight on how to move forward with past bad experiences.

[Sherry Cabrera · Rating 5 out of 5]

One of my all time favorite books. Really puts life in perspective and explains what really makes a person happy.

[Pedro · Rating 5 out of 5]

Pedro Miranda

26 September 2020

English 11A

Mrs. Schemenauer

How to Get What You Want and Want What You Have
By: John gray

John Gray wrote a book that interprets a whole new meaning into your life. This book expressed and focused on how you could have anything you wanted because it was within reach. Focus points were on how success comes from improving and inventing. John Gray would even say how happiness is the only point in doing things. When you read this book it helps you feel whole about what you have and what you want. Three ruling points said by John Gray that put this book together remain to be “Business is not about money. It’s about making dreams come true for others and for yourself”.“Making a company is a great way to improve the world while improving yourself”.“Never do anything just for the money”. This book can inform you on topics such as Money can’t buy happiness, Selling our outer success, the value of meditation, how to decharge stress, letting go of negative emotions, find your magic star, practices and healing meditations. A chapter that spoke to me would have to be chapter 13 “FIND YOUR MAGIC STAR” This chapter made me aware of the fact that when anyone has a desire that is not fulfilled we give up on it, it made me realize that your desires or dreams are 100% within grasp and you are your only foe. This chapter let me know how trust, care and strong desire are key components and to keep these attitudes, you must be in touch with and how you feel about what you have and what you want. Yes I recommend this book it’s such a practical and improving book for personal success.

[Ouiame Filali · Rating 5 out of 5]

To control our life we have to deal with our past and all the negative feelings left.
In every step of our life, from infancy to adulthood, we need a special kind of love; the love of GOD, of our parents, of our siblings and friends, of our partner, of our children, of people who needs us, but the most important we need to love, value and appreciate ourselves. Any lack of these love tanks could negatively affect our present and future. Sometimes we feel depressed, empty or paralyzed, we have all what we need, still we are not happy. We feel nothing and the worst is that we start to blame our family and friends, we lose control over our feelings and relationships, we feel disconnected from our desires, our dreams seem unreachable and we don't recognize our self anymore. The innocent child, the ambitious adult, the dreamer, all of them just disappear, leaving us to infinite sorrow.
John Gray show us how to deal with this emptiness and inability to be happy and how to create a life of true fulfillment. He takes us into a journey inside each of us to reconcile our past with our present, to forgive our parents' mistakes and appreciate their love instead, to forgive ourselves for the mistakes we didn't do and to find the love we didn't have when we needed it.
Our life is not a result of our past, but of our attitude dealing with this past.
A must read book.

[Shhhhh Ahhhhh · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was a significantly better book than expected and I plan to buy a hard copy of it. What drives my appraisal of it is a section towards the end that describes an exercise in identifying and resolving emotional blocks. It asks the reader to identify common emotions (like anger) and to describe them in terms of the underlying emotions (shame, guilt, sorrow, etc). The book walks the reader through resolving these emotional blocks by writing about them (I'm ashamed about__, I'm feeling guilty about __) depending on the surface emotion being perceived, asking you to dig deep and evaluate what's going on with you, and end the write up describing what you want. I think this is probably one of the more useful things I've picked up in a 'self help' book like this, especially given the title. There are some sort of adjacent/ parallel thought exercises to accomplish the same end (like revisiting old instances of a given emotion to resolve it currently, which was intriguing).

There were some other nuggets but that was the most impacting for me personally.

Unlike most other books in its category, I DO suggest that other people read this book.

[Claire Binkley · Rating 3 out of 5]

I most liked how simple John Gray made success sound.

There are lots of little anecdotes to support his thesis, as well. ("You can get what you want and enjoy it.")

I didn't give him a maximum rating since his advice is a little reliant on God.
I mean, I've read that could stand for "Good Orderly Direction" so that is essentially OK.

This guide does not have an index, which lost it esteem in my opinion, even if it does condone meditation, which I like.

One thing I found a little distracting about this book were the seemingly arbitrary
_____________________________________
remarks which didn't seem to be any more or less important than the rest of the text.
_____________________________________

So this is a reasonable book.

[Karen JEC · Rating 4 out of 5]

Read by a young, male American narrator, suitable for x1.75 speed. An interesting read, definitely makes you think about your life from different perspectives.

Favourite Quotes:

"The secret to staying in touch with our true self is to keep filling up our love tanks."

"The secret of personal success is to be true to yourself and to continue wanting more."

"The secret to increasing your power to get what you want is to feel your negative emotions when you don’t get what you want and then release them. As you learn to release negative feelings and emotions, you’re left feeling your true desires."

"When there is an abundance of green lights in your life, you don’t mind the occasional red light... Create green lights by healing your past."

[Ella Kļetnaja · Rating 3 out of 5]

искусство достижения личного успеХа в значительной степени представляет собой умение трансФормировать негативные эмоции в позитивные ощущения, воспринимать негативный опыт как пройденный урок.

У кажого человека свой личный успех будет своим личным, отлиным от успеха другого.

большую часть времени мы несчастны, потому что чего-то хотим.

Чтобы нашей жизни сопутсвовало Божье благословние , мы должны делать для обретения желаемого всё, что в нашиХ силаХ. А Бог делает для этого то, что не в нашиХ силаХ.

Благословлять за то что у меня есть уже, плюс уверенность в том, что я могу иметь больше, стали магнитом которыйй притягиеват к моей жизни успеХ.

если в вас есть сильное желание, то вы получите то чего вам хочется. вселенная откликается на все желания. сильная вера даёт вам уверенность в себе , порождающая решительность , настойчивоть и могучее стремление .

если Вы не получаете то что вам нужно, значит вы ищете не там, где нуЖно.

[Shirin Abdel Rahman · Rating 5 out of 5]

I won't exaggerate and say this book changed my life yet it changed my perspective to certain matters.
the author is advocating a mental and religious approach to heal your soul and cope with your new life, no one can control his life hundred percent or external factors yet we can definitely control the outcome and how we see things from our point of view, let the bygones bygone and stop blaming others for your anxiety,depression and fear of the future, the four tanks of love and twelve blocks are the best part, instead of blaming live your life,instead of stacking in the past , predict your future and gain control of your life.

[Vijay · Rating 3 out of 5]

Good book...loved the concept of love tanks... just like Hinduism, we have to be content and happy about what we have by God's grace and we have to keep donating something on different occasions to help yourself, as it will give you more satisfaction than anything else. Here, important thing is, we don't need wealth all the time but we may offer our service, time, love, even just a smile at least to needy people, animals or even mother earth and you will get back at least twice what you donated or offered someone.

[Dieter Berndt · Rating 5 out of 5]

Once you begin to get the message, you simply cannot put it down. The book has concepts that have steered me in the right direction and helped me to address my own blocks, needs and wants.
It is not a book for reading once, but a book for keeping close to you for easy reference. Coupled with the Sedona Method, I highly recommend this book with confidence. It is a game changing read.

[Amy Dale · Rating 3 out of 5]

DNF I absolutely loved John Gray in The Secret film, and while his book covers many things I'm interested in,his writing isn't as engaging and inspiring as watching him talk about it.

There wasn't really anything here I haven't read in the tons of other books like this,but for a newbie to success and manifesting,etc,it would likely be great.

[Sahar Hasan · Rating 5 out of 5]

من الكتب اللي أحب يكون بالمكتبة ، لقراءته في كل وقت .. ساعدني لتغيير أشياء وأمور كثيرة بحياتي .. لم تكن واضحة بالنسبة لي ولمن حولي فهمتها وتعلمتها واحاول أن ادرب نفسي عليها وأنفذها .. هناك معاني كثيرة نغفل عن معانيها الأصلية ومعنى إحساسنا بها وكيف نتعامل معها وكيف نستقبلها من الٱخرين ..
أشكر الكاتب على محاولة تفسير بعض مايدور داخلنا وداخل من حولنا في هذا العالم ..

[Jinmin Lei · Rating 5 out of 5]

I read this book several years ago. I think of it lately as I felt as mentioned in the book, my love tank must be empty due to some events happened in my life. This book is easy to understand and has opened the door to my interest in psychology.

[Barrie · Rating 1 out of 5]

I found this book to be the same old jargon with lots of reference to God thrown in. Too many references made it start to feel it was a preach and by the end of the book I realised I'd got next to nothing out of it. Lots of repetition too.

[Sarah Manning · Rating 1 out of 5]

I understand having a strong faith and I understand repetition to reinforce positive messages. If you found this book helpful, that’s great. I on the other hand felt as though I was partaking in a brainwashing exercise. Not for me.

[Katie · Rating 3 out of 5]

I honestly think that this book provides some profound insight about the self and how our childhood plays a huge role in how we treat ourselves. Great, insightful, fast read.

[Sheenam Pathak · Rating 3 out of 5]

Its good to read but I felt repetition of ideas again and again.