Asserting Yourself: A Practical Guide For Positive Change, Updated Edition

by Sharon Anthony Bower, Gordon H. Bower

This comprehensive guide focuses on a technique called DESC scripting, a step-by-step program for handling interpersonal conflicts and a self-change program.

Genres: Self Help, Psychology, Communication

256 pages, Paperback

First published June 30, 1976

Reviews

[Melsene G · Rating 4 out of 5]

Great book with lots of tips and exercises to help you become more assertive. These self help books are great but you need to actually spend the time and do the exercises.

The most helpful part of the book is the DESC Scripting chapters. This is a way to help you deal with conflicts and negotiate a plan with your so called 'downer.' Describe the offensive behavior objectively to your downer. Express how you feel about that behavior in a positive way, use metaphors. Specify how you'd like to see that behavior changed. One at a time and be specific. Spell out the Consequences of such a change and emphasize the positive ones.

Sample scripts are provided and are very helpful. There are appendices dealing with the principles of behavior change, progressive relaxation, and rules for contracting. If you need some help speaking up more with your friends, family, or at work, you'll benefit from reading this book.

[Tania · Rating 2 out of 5]

I pondered a 3rd star, but I just couldn't bring myself to do it. In many ways the book is interchangeable with a lot of others on the topic of assertiveness. It's worth reading, certainly, I just wouldn't pay retail for it.

The DESC model, and the quiz at the beginning to help the reader determine how assertive s/he currently is are great. The material on self esteem and stress were boring to me; I'd seen it before with other sources. Chapters 4 and 5 were the best; they got into the exercises/activities and the DESC model. The remaining chapters weren't as strong. The book started to drag at that point. That said, I do like that the author gave the reader alot of opportunity for practice; the exercises themselves are good. I just wish that there'd been more actual content and information. She could've done a supplemental workbook to include all the extra exercises

[David Bayliss · Rating 3 out of 5]

Worth reading, but the language and some of the concepts are outdated. The language is verbose, and this makes it a pain in the ass to read. It's boring and reads, kind of like a textbook. The information is definitely worth reading, but it's a struggle to get through without wanting to throw it out the window or fall asleep.

[Sara Ramaswamy · Rating 5 out of 5]

Packed with endless tactics, tangible advice, and examples to put into practice immediately

[Elizabeth]

As seen in The Assertiveness Workbook.