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Aquarium

David Vann (Goodreads Author)

3.73 · Rating details · 3,997 ratings · 843 reviews

Twelve-year-old Caitlin lives alone with her mother—a docker at the local container port—in subsidized housing next to an airport in Seattle. Each day, while she waits to be picked up after school, Caitlin visits the local aquarium to study the fish. Gazing at the creatures within the watery depths, Caitlin accesses a shimmering universe beyond her own. When she befriends ...more

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Hardcover, 266 pages

Published March 3rd 2015 by Atlantic Monthly Press Grove/Atlantic, Inc. - Grove/Atlantic, Inc. - Atlantic Monthly Press

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· 3,997 ratings · 843 reviews

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Nov 02, 2014 Elyse Walters rated it it was amazing

Shelves: netgalley

Update again for those interested...
$1.99 Kindle special- again today. I’ve read this book 3 times - had received the ebook early advance Arc copy years ago...
Then bought the hardcopy for myself with the little colored photos of fish. It’s a gorgeous physical book..
And I’ve given this book as a gift a few times.
Is it the best book in the world? Of course not...but am I glad I read it? Absolutely- would not have wanted to miss this one.

I’m still regretful that I didn’t make it to SF the evenin ...more

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Feb 02, 2015 Will Byrnes rated it really liked it

Shelves: fiction

(4/25/15 - I added at the bottom a bit on a book tour stop Vann made in Brooklyn)

Anything is possible with a parent. Parents are gods. They make us and they destroy us. They warp the world and remake it in their own shape, and that’s the world we know forever after. It’s the only world. We can’t see what it might have looked like otherwise.

I have no idea how hard my parents’ lives were as kids. By the time I had gained enough self-awareness to seriously wonder, too far into adulthood, they ...more

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Jun 12, 2015 Shelby *trains flying monkeys* rated it liked it · review of another edition

Shelves: read-2016, ripped-out-my-dang-heart, first-reads

Twelve year old Caitlyn spends her afternoons at the aquarium. Her over-worked mom buys her a pass so that she can stay there afterschool until her mom gets off work. Caitlyn doesn't mind though because fish are her favorite things.

One afternoon Caitlyn meets an old man that is hanging out at the aquarium. He starts coming everyday to see the fish and to see Caitlyn.

Caitlyn's mom finds out and freaks out. Sure, that the old man is a big old perv bucket and is out to take Caitlyn and run. ...more

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Nov 05, 2014 Angela M rated it it was amazing

Shelves: netgalley-reviews

One of the things that immediately impressed me about David Vann was how a man could create this narrative from the viewpoint of a 32 year old woman looking back and speaking to us from here 12 year old self . Later I became more impressed that Vann somehow made me want to continue reading after some raw and brutal moments that made me put the book down. But I couldn't put it down for long because I had to know how Caitlin's story would end . I can usually read a 300 page book in 2 or 3 days . T

One of the things that immediately impressed me about David Vann was how a man could create this narrative from the viewpoint of a 32 year old woman looking back and speaking to us from here 12 year old self . Later I became more impressed that Vann somehow made me want to continue reading after some raw and brutal moments that made me put the book down. But I couldn't put it down for long because I had to know how Caitlin's story would end . I can usually read a 300 page book in 2 or 3 days . This one was 272 pages and I read it in one day , reading most of the afternoon and staying up pretty late .

I loved Caitlin from the beginning and I just had a feeling her heart might get broken and so would mine . There is something so endearing and pure about a child narrator , even if they are smart and precious as Caitlin is . And so began the knot in my stomach that didn't give way until the end .

Sheri is a single Mom , a hard working laborer on the docks in Seattle who struggles to provide for Caitlin . She can get by but never get ahead. Caitlin spends a lot of time alone and goes to the Aquarium after school to wait for her mother to get out of work . Caitlin has no sense of a family because it's just her and her mother and she has the constant fear of losing her. Caitlin loves fish and her time spent at the Aquarium studying them . The descriptions of the fish are amazing , not the ones on the signs by the tanks but in how Caitlin describes them . This is a solitary enjoyment until she meets an old man at the Aquarium and they become friends . At first their meetings seemed a little creepy to me until we learn who the old man is .

But more than creepy and brutal is what we see later when the floodgates open up to the past that her mother never talked about . I can't even touch on what happens here not just because I don't want to give it away . I could use spoiler tags . I just can't even describe it so it will have to be enough to say it was gut wrenching.

While this was a quick read , it was not an easy one dealing with emotional and physical abuse , the impact of horrible things in the past that create people's future ability to cope or not as was the case here .

My only disappointment was that in the e-galley version , I missed out on what must be beautiful pictures of the fish since I could only see black and white photos that weren't very clear to begin with . Maybe the pictures would have loosened that knot in my stomach. The only complaint I have was that the ending felt too rushed just tying things up and I would like to have known more about Caitlin over the 20 years . But I can hardly give it less than five stars . I woke up this morning thinking about this book and more than likely will think about it for a while more.

(Since I read and reviewed this book I was able to see the beautiful pictures of the fish by downloading the e-galley to my iPad . It would have been better to see them initially but they are beautiful),

Thanks to Grove Atlantic and NetGalley . ...more

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Nov 29, 2014 Debbie rated it it was amazing

Shelves: kids-teens-good-bad, lgbt, best-reads-2012-through-2019, almost-all-time-faves

Fan-effing-tastic!! Favorite book of 2015 so far! My god, what a masterpiece! OMG OMG OMG!!!

I wasn’t planning on reading this book--it wasn’t on my 2015 Challenge List, lol. But a good friend excitedly read me some of the fish poetry. Beauteous! But is there a plot? I need plot! Yes, she assured me. Man oh man is there a plot. And it’s one of the most original stories I’ve ever read. I’m SO glad I veered off course and picked up this gem.

Here’s what it felt like:
Lyrical lyrical fish fish fish. T Fan-effing-tastic!! Favorite book of 2015 so far! My god, what a masterpiece! OMG OMG OMG!!!

I wasn’t planning on reading this book--it wasn’t on my 2015 Challenge List, lol. But a good friend excitedly read me some of the fish poetry. Beauteous! But is there a plot? I need plot! Yes, she assured me. Man oh man is there a plot. And it’s one of the most original stories I’ve ever read. I’m SO glad I veered off course and picked up this gem.

Here’s what it felt like:
Lyrical lyrical fish fish fish. Then wham! Drama drama solid prose, fast fast fast. Scary, heart-wrenching. Dangerous. Then back to the sing song of fish talk, beauteous, floaty. Oops, you don’t get to float too far away, because now you're pulled back into the muck, action action, intense, punch. And the fish pretty much swim away for a while as the story, strong, is the only thing in your field of vision, in your gut, in your soul. And you can't take your eyes off of it or pull your heart out of it, so don't even try.

As for the plot, all I will say is that it's about a sweet 12-year-old girl who loves fish, visits the aquarium every day, and meets an old man. Try not to read the reviews because the less you know, the better. Let the surprises hit you full force.

This book has one of the most intense scenes I’ve EVER read, seriously. The writing is phenomenal, the scene so vivid, you’re right there. It’s not gory, but as you witness the events, you twitch, wince, worry, and gasp. That’s too tame—you scream holy shit! But then you let out a breath (which you’ve been holding in like a mad fool), lean back in your chair, and say, oh I see how this could happen. The author threw some hot peppers from the past into the chili of the present, so what did I expect?

The fish metaphors are unique, profound, and plentiful. Apparently the book includes gorgeous pictures of fish; all I got on my Kindle were grayish blobs. Time to buy the hardback; this is a book I’ll want on my shelf anyway.

I can hear the complaints now. Some will be pissed that there aren’t any quote marks, which didn’t bother me at all; you could easily tell who was saying what. And others will say that the mean one is both too unbelievable and too despicable. Of course I ached for the victim. But I also saw why the mean one was so mean, and I could eke out a little sympathy. I said a LITTLE, guys. There will be people who can't forgive. And there are people who don't like a book because they don't like a character. Me? The madder the weirder the meaner, bring it on, as long as they are vivid and alive and complex.

This book reminds me of why I love literature. It's just fucking brilliant. Vann is a storyteller extraordinaire. Where has he been all my life? I must read his earlier work. I must.

Vann sprinkled some luscious food flakes into my fish tank and I swam over, tilted my head toward the sky, puckered my lips, and gulped, savoring every morsel. Food for my soul. Oh yes.
...more

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May 18, 2015 Kelly (and the Book Boar) rated it really liked it

Shelves: liburrrrrry-book, skillet-to-the-face, read-in-2015, black-as-mitchell-s-heart

Find all of my reviews at: http://52bookminimum.blogspot.com/

“Origins. They don’t explain us, you know. They never do. Each of us is our own piece of work.”

When I read the premise of Aquarium I immediately decided it was most definitely NOT. FOR. ME. A 12-year old latchkey type of kid who spends her after school hours at the local aquarium and befriends an old man???? Uhhhhhh . . .

But damn this book was persistent. It would not stay off my feed. I finally decided to give it a go based o ...more

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Nov 02, 2014 Diane S ☔ rated it really liked it

This book is a full package presentation, exquisitely assembled with the utmost care. The cover resembles iridescent fish scales, shades of silver, pink and aqua. The title of the novel, "aquarium' written in silvery aqua print. Simply gorgeous. Inside the end papers are on brilliant aqua and the pages are thickly cut. The aquarium is where a twelve year old girl first encounters a man who turns out to be someone very important in her life'. The pictures of the fishes they seem real and expressi ...more

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Oct 08, 2016 Linda rated it really liked it

Shelves: favorites, fiction

"An old man next to me suddenly, his voice an unwelcome surprise. No one ever spoke to me here. Dark rooms, humid and warm, haven from the snow outside."

Twelve year old Caitlin Thompson sits poised before the glass encased sanctuaries. Artificial renderings of ocean habitats. Beautiful specimens hiding and blending and reacting with genetically encoded responses. Much like their human counterparts, these fish, these squatters of the sea. Mesmorized by movement and non-movement alike.

Caitlin wait "An old man next to me suddenly, his voice an unwelcome surprise. No one ever spoke to me here. Dark rooms, humid and warm, haven from the snow outside."

Twelve year old Caitlin Thompson sits poised before the glass encased sanctuaries. Artificial renderings of ocean habitats. Beautiful specimens hiding and blending and reacting with genetically encoded responses. Much like their human counterparts, these fish, these squatters of the sea. Mesmorized by movement and non-movement alike.

Caitlin waits for her mother, Sheri, to retrieve her at the end of her laborious shift dressed in heavy work boots and overalls. Mother and daughter form a cocoon within the walls of their public housing apartment. Private. So unlike those fish sanctuaries within the Aquarium. Snuggling under the covers with their own sense of camouflage. Species quite unknown to the public.

Until all would change......Caitlin begins heart-rendering conversations with this age-spotted old man who resembles much of the speckled fish behind the glass with his wirey hair and slow gait. He soon becomes Caitlin's haven. A port in the storm of her lacklustre life. Shifted here and there by her mother, Caitlin savors the attention and any nugget of deep conversation. She and the old man set up a time for Caitlin's mother to meet him. And this ship at sea capsizes.....

David Vann presents a heavy, heavy experience within these pages. Please know that it is not for the light-hearted. Vann's character of Sheri throws back shots from the Bar of Vengeance like no other. She swallows gulps of poison continuously with the dissolutioned aim of killing her transgressor. Such bitterness can leave a stain upon the very ones that we profess to love. It is very, very difficult to experience. But it attempts to reveal a raw reality.

The character of Caitlin dances through the pages beckoning you, the reader, to follow. You must know. You must know. Vann is remarkable as to how he gets into the heads of his female characters with such finesse. I watched with awe as he created such scenarios in Caribou Island. This is brilliant work here by a superb author. But his steps into this literary world can bring such deep impressions of heartbreak. And yet, Vann leaves behind the fragrance of hope and perhaps lessons lived within the slow-moving grains of time. ...more

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Apr 20, 2015 Debbie "DJ" rated it it was amazing

Shelves: fiction, favorites, lgbt

I absolutely LOVED this book. Wow! What a writer David Vann is! The beginning is so original. Fish! But not the kind of fish that automatically come to mind, fish that are rarely seen. Vann describes them so poetically, and each is related to our human world and emotions. Since I love biology so much, for me I couldn't get enough. So many exquisite paragraphs! Here's an example of just one, "Body of small green leaves, veined, very thin, it's fins painted in light cast from elsewhere, but from h ...more

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Oct 03, 2014 Rebecca rated it really liked it

Shelves: read-via-edelweiss, reviewed-bookkaholic

(3.5) So I kept wondering what the metaphorical significance of the aquarium fish in this book might be. Turns out David Vann just really likes fish. Here’s the revelatory passage from his memoir, A Mile Down:

I’ve loved tropical fish all my life, at one point in junior high had eight aquariums spread throughout the house. For years, even in upstate New York, in grad school, I had gazed at fish every night, watching how they fluttered, imagined myself suspended in warm water with them, so this [s

...more

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Nov 02, 2014 Michael rated it it was amazing

Shelves: netgalley, fiction, coming-of-age, family-relationships, nature, washington, seattle

I know Vann has some other good books out there, but this one was a great introduction to his talents. A twelve-year old girl tells her story of discovery and hope in the context of a disturbing family drama in contemporary Seattle. Her single mom, Sheri, works hard at a container shipping facility, and each day Caitlin spends her afternoons grooving on the wonders at the aquarium. Her life may suffer from the grimness of poverty and the constraints of a tiny apartment in an industrial neighborh ...more

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May 10, 2015 Carol rated it really liked it · review of another edition

Shelves: dark, intense, ebook, read-2015, fiction

Beautiful..Creepy...Shocking..Horrible...Unforgettable

Where to start.....this was a spur of the moment pick for me not knowing what to read next.....you all know the feeling.....so instead of reading one of the umpteen books I already own, I decided to download another on my iPad bc of one review in particular I just happened to see on GR.....

To begin with, I must tell you the pictures of the various fish at the aquarium throughout the book were so amazing and lifelike, they seemed to jump out a

...more

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Mar 21, 2015 Jen rated it really liked it

Aquarium is one twisted story. Caitlin, 12, visits the aquarium daily as she waits for her mother after school. While being fascinated by the fish and their wondrous world of colour, depth and life, she befriends an old man who turns out to be her Grandfather. What follows is a vivid and brutal account where her mother torments her and demands she stop the relationship with her estranged father. This is a story of forgiveness, growth and redemption. The prose is eloquent. The pictures of the var ...more

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Jul 19, 2015 Cher rated it it was amazing

Shelves: bookclub, cover_lover, audiobook, literary-misc

5 stars - Utterly amazing.

Unique, captivating, powerful, brilliant. I believe this is only the 2nd five star rating I have given this year, so when I say it was utterly amazing, I mean it. Those ratings are not tossed around lightly in my corner of the world! (The other 5 star rating was what continues to so far be my favorite read of the year thus far, The Orenda ). I started this little novel today and didn't put it down until I had read the very last page; it was that engrossing.

That being s ...more

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Dec 25, 2014 Zoeytron rated it it was amazing

Recommended to Zoeytron by: DJ

Shelves: public-library

There are things that happen to us in life that leave dents. Whether in the soul or in the mind, the damage is done. It may be forgivable, or it may not. 'One life can never know another's.'

Twelve year old Caitlyn doesn't eat fish because she loves them too much. Not hard to imagine, knowing she spends every afternoon at the Aquarium after school lets out. She knows the exhibits backwards and forwards, is a veritable fount of knowledge, well-schooled (if you will) in all things having to do with ...more

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Apr 23, 2015 Caroline rated it liked it

Recommended to Caroline by: tinabel

Shelves: realistic-fiction, he-wrote-it, mothers-and-daughters, child-narrator

***NO SPOILERS***

It can’t be denied: There’s more to this story than meets the eye. This starts out as placid as its aquarium setting, with a girl, an old man, and lots of pretty and unusual fish, but those thinking Aquarium is too sweet and perfect will wonder before long why they ever thought such a thing.

The narrator is tween Caitlin, a likable character who becomes friends with an old man. This kind of friendship has been done countless times before, but author David Vann avoided cliché. In ***NO SPOILERS***

It can’t be denied: There’s more to this story than meets the eye. This starts out as placid as its aquarium setting, with a girl, an old man, and lots of pretty and unusual fish, but those thinking Aquarium is too sweet and perfect will wonder before long why they ever thought such a thing.

The narrator is tween Caitlin, a likable character who becomes friends with an old man. This kind of friendship has been done countless times before, but author David Vann avoided cliché. In part, this is thanks to his decision to have an aquarium play a central role. Throughout, he drew comparisons between the ocean and marine life in general to everyday life:

Evelyn was staring at me as if I were in a tank, some new species first swimming in the open to be observed. My arms become fins again, but not of lace or leaves. They felt heavy as rock, fins made of stone, unable to grab at the water. Stuck on the ocean floor, held down as eyes peered in, magnified.

The feel of the aquarium is starkly different from the feel of the narrator’s home, yet Vann connected the two intimately. It’s at the aquarium or when pondering ocean life that Caitlin is her most introspective and grasps truths about herself and ordinary life; indeed, Aquarium is one of the more quotable books out there:

"Anything is possible with a parent. Parents are gods. They make us and they destroy us. They warp the world and remake it in their own shape, and that's the world we know forever after. It's the only world. We can't see what it might have looked like otherwise."

"Each thing that happens to us, each and every thing, it leaves some dent, and that dent will always be there. Each of us is a walking wreck."

"The worst part of childhood is not knowing that bad things pass, that time passes. A terrible moment in childhood hovers with a kind of eternity, unbearable."

Vann’s priority was scene-setting, because his characters could've used more dimension. That's especially obvious with the old-man character, who's unfailingly caring and meek to the point of saintly. Vann did present a history of some characters that fleshes them out but only somewhat. Mainly he settled for black-and-white portrayals.

As if wanting to make sure that Aquarium is recognized as a coming-of-age story, Vann also tackled Caitlin’s growing sexual awareness in some frank and eye-opening scenes. These aren't totally realistic for a few reasons, but they're outstanding in adding an element of hard truth and cutting sweetness. What’s unfortunate is that this is the only part that’s coming-of-age. It’s a shame; here Vann fashioned this charming, honest twelve-year-old yet never explored anything else typical of this time in a person’s life, such as the myriad competing emotions and confusion.

This book is a bit odd because it starts one way, then transforms drastically into something else. In an unpredictable twist, Vann tackled some big, deeply sad and disturbing issues. They’re not too much to swallow, but the tone change is jarring. This “post-twist” section is definitely gripping, although it could've been more powerful. Other authors have done some of what Vann did here but more fully realized. The “big issues” are intriguingly shocking, gritty even. It’s really laudable that Vann was unafraid to make his reader so uncomfortable; nevertheless, the scenes don’t pack quite the knock-down punch he was aiming for, with the underdeveloped characterization largely to blame for that. Still, Aquarium is memorable and should be read to experience the ultra-quotable prose; Caitlin’s voice; startling, page-turning scenes; and that twist.

NOTE: This book contains photos of fish throughout; I therefore recommend avoiding the audio version and maybe also e-book. Paper form is ideal. ...more

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Nov 02, 2014 Dianne rated it really liked it

Shelves: best-of-2015

First of all, if you are going to read this book, do yourself a favor and read the hardcopy version. The physical book is a work of art in itself – a beautiful, textured silver/blue fish scale patterned jacket. Thick, creamy pages with colored plates of the fish referenced in the story. Large wide-spaced font that is easy on the eye. It’s a visual and tactile experience that should not be missed.

The writing is amazing. The downside of reading a hard copy is not being able to highlight passages t First of all, if you are going to read this book, do yourself a favor and read the hardcopy version. The physical book is a work of art in itself – a beautiful, textured silver/blue fish scale patterned jacket. Thick, creamy pages with colored plates of the fish referenced in the story. Large wide-spaced font that is easy on the eye. It’s a visual and tactile experience that should not be missed.

The writing is amazing. The downside of reading a hard copy is not being able to highlight passages to reflect on later. In the first part of the book, the conversations between Caitlyn and the old man about the fish in the aquarium are gems.

“I found him at the darkest tank, in a corner, alone, peering through what could have been a window to the stars, endless black and cold and only a few points of light. Hung in this void like a small constellation, the ghost pipefish, impossible.

Like a leaf giving birth to stars, I said, whispering, as if any sound might make the fish vanish.

Yes, the old man whispered back. Exactly that. I couldn’t have said it better myself. Sometimes I can’t believe you’re only twelve. You should become an ichthyologist. This is who you are.”

Do you know what a ghost pipefish looks like? Of course you don’t – so the author provides a lovely colorful picture of the fish so you can see for yourself how apt Caitlyn’s description is.

The story is about Caitlyn, her mother Sheri, and the old man. Sheri is raising Caitlyn on her own , working as a basic laborer in the container port in Seattle. They live in poverty, isolated with no family and no support. Caitlyn spends her afternoons after school in Seattle’s aquarium, where she waits for her mother to pick her up after work. It is here Caitlyn encounters the old man and they become friends, bonding over their shared interest in the fish. One day, the old man asks to be introduced to Caitlyn’s mother – and all hell breaks loose.

The book becomes very intense and uncomfortable and there is violence – there is an immense, boundless rage here. To the author’s credit, however, for the most part he keeps you on the hook. You ride out these parts because you want to see what happens next and what will happen to these characters.

I am not sure I totally buy into the ending, but I can see the appeal.

Well done – I can promise you will not forget this one.
...more

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Feb 27, 2015 Andrew Smith rated it it was amazing · review of another edition

Caitlin is 12 years old and lives in run-down and sparse accommodation in Seattle with her mother, Sheri. After school each day she visits the local aquarium where she stares at the fish with wonder and awe. On one such day, while she waits for her mother to pick her up, she meets an old man who she befriends.

This is the set-up for a novel that starts out like a fairy tale but takes a dark turn to something much nastier and more challenging. Sheri’s job is physically demanding and as a single p ...more

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Mar 03, 2015 Iris P rated it it was amazing · review of another edition

Shelves: coming-of-age, favorites-all-of-time, 2015-favorites, fiction, lgtb-queer

Raw, evocative, fierce and relentless are some of the adjectives that have been used to describe this book. Aquarium can also be described as a coming of age story, which are not particularly rare, but I am sure this is by far the most emotionally intense I've ever read.

On a pure visual level, this is a gorgeous book to look at. The novel is enhanced by the beautiful and colorful pictures of fish and other sea creatures that are cleverly integrated into the story. I read Aquarium on my Kindl ...more

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Sep 27, 2018 Renee Godding rated it it was amazing

Shelves: renée-recommends

This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers. To view it, click here. “Each thing that happens to us, each and every thing, it leaves some dent, and that dent will always be there. Each of us is a walking wreck.”

Keeping to the theme here: Aquarium is somewhat like an anglerfish; it draws you in with the lightness of an innocent friendship between a young girl and an elderly man, who bond over their shared love for the local aquarium. Then it reveals its raw and harrowing true form and rips your heart to shreds where you least expected it.

Seriously: I was not prep ...more

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Mar 06, 2015 Sue rated it really liked it

Shelves: read-2015, net-galley, fiction, ya

This is my first reading of a book by David Vann; unlikely to be the last. He drew me in slowly to this story of the dreary life of a mother and pre-teen daughter in Seattle. There are specks of brightness provided by the fish swimming in the titular Aquarium, a metaphor for so much. This is the place where Caitlin, 12 years old, escapes every day after school, bonding with all the fish, knowing their idiosyncrasies, revealing their beauty to all.

This is also a book that is pounding with emotion ...more

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Mar 22, 2019 Lisa rated it it was amazing

Shelves: 2019-favorites

This was a brutal, beautiful novel that I could not put down. Turning these pages, I stepped right into the cold, gray Seattle neighborhood. I felt the backbreaking load of Sheri's work at a container port and the respite of the aquarium for Caitlin (with the stunning fish pictures.) I loved the character of Caitlin and wanted to swoop in and protect her.

I can't think of a book I've read where ugliness and beauty are juxtaposed like they are in this novel. I believed every moment - and because ...more

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Aug 25, 2018 Celia rated it really liked it

Shelves: 2018-read, elyse, ten-year-challenge, book-shelf-former, 2018-ec, ya, states

"Aquarium" by David Vann is a novel set in 1994 Seattle. It is told from the perspective of a 32 year old Caitlan about events that happened to her in 1994 when she was 12.

Caitlan is the daughter of a single mother, Sheri, who works at the Seattle docks. They live in subsidized housing next to Boeing Field. Caitlan spends her after school time at the Seattle Aquarium, waiting for her mother to pick her up after work. The world of the aquarium is so beautiful to Caitlan, she feels more alive ther ...more

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May 12, 2015 Leanne rated it liked it

Shelves: my-heart-hurts, read-in-2016

I would rate this one a 3.5 - in some ways it was enchanting and I couldn't tear my eyes away, but it was a bit too simply written and bleak to be bumped up to a 4. Still recommended, because the plot takes a few powerful and unexpected twists and turns and it's a unique concept. Plus, there are lots of pretty pictures of fish!

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Apr 04, 2015 RitaSkeeter rated it it was ok

Shelves: 2015, contemporary

*Possible Spoilers*

I could rate this either 2 stars or 4 stars and both would be honest ratings. It shows how conflicted I am about this book. On the the one hand, the author clearly is an exceptionally good writer. He has clear, simple prose and a main character whose pain reaches you from the page. Caitlin shows us only a snapshot in her life, which revolves around her grandfather entering her life. Whilst Caitlyn doesn't share it with us, there are hints that not all was well at home for her *Possible Spoilers*

I could rate this either 2 stars or 4 stars and both would be honest ratings. It shows how conflicted I am about this book. On the the one hand, the author clearly is an exceptionally good writer. He has clear, simple prose and a main character whose pain reaches you from the page. Caitlin shows us only a snapshot in her life, which revolves around her grandfather entering her life. Whilst Caitlyn doesn't share it with us, there are hints that not all was well at home for her prior to this incident. We see Caitlin retreat into the world of fish. When at her happiest, or feeling most safe, we see her talk of sinking to the bottom of the ocean and snuggling down. The level of Caitlin's interest in fish, or more importantly her retreat into the world of fish, goes beyond a childhood interest and seems to function more as an escape for her. This becomes even more important for Caitlin when we see her mother's breakdown when faced with past traumas.

It would be easy to hate Sheri. Her treatment of Caitlin is disturbing, at least. Yet while condemning her behaviour and her treatment of Caitlin, I have empathy for this mother. She lost her childhood, her innocence, and now works in a dead-end job with no light for how to improve her lot. Sheri has had to survive alone and without care or support, and seems devoid of hope that she can make life any better for herself, or for Caitlin. In beginning chapters we see a mother who, whilst making parenting choices I wouldn't, loves her child, wants the best for her child, and is doing the very best she can for her. It sometimes felt as though the author wanted us to hate Sheri with the unrelenting negativity with which she is portrayed. This is particularly contrasted by the characterisation of the grandfather who is provided a more sympathetic showing, despite the choices he made leading to how Sheri is now. Something clicked for me when I remembered that we are seeing this through Caitlin's eyes. This is how she sees the adults in her life. She sees her mother as damaged and out of control, whereas her grandfather - whom had only ever been kind to her, despite his past demons - she sees as caring, protective, loving.

An issue I have with the book is the sexual awakening of Caitlin. Do I know that some 12 year old have sex? Yes. Do I want to read with some detail about 12 year olds being sexually intimate. No. I was very uncomfortable with this section of the storyline and felt it unnecessary. I believe the author was trying to show a couple of things. First, Caitlin's desperate search for love. Second, that the feelings released through sexual play helped Caitlin reach her 'happy' place of being n the ocean floor - a feeling that had previously only been available to her through visiting the aquarium. I believe the author could have achieved the same aims without developing this storyline in the way it was, or alternately Caitlin could have been made older. In addition, the mother and grandfather's reactions to the Caitlin's relationship were concerning for me. The mother showed a level of homophobia and prejudice that further damaged her by now fragile relationship with Caitlin. The grandfather, whilst he should be applauded for accepting Caitlin and for not shaming her, appeared to just accept the relationship. It may well be love, as he described it, but what parent wouldn't put boundaries around sexual relationships for 12 year olds in their care?

So to return to the start of this review, this book was a mixed bag for me. A book that is beautifully written, however with plot elements that are deeply troubling to me. ...more

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Jul 12, 2015 Lisa Vegan rated it really liked it

Recommended to Lisa by: Debbie and Donna

Shelves: fiction, readbooks-male-author-or-illust, goodreads-author, novel, groups-buddies, 1-also-at-librarything, z2016, zz-4star, orphaned-and-quasi-orphaned-kids, reviewed

I really liked this book. Mostly, I loved Caitlin’s voice, a child’s voice, an adult who remembers childhood looking back. She’s great. She’s what makes the book special. I think the writing is beautiful, and that’s also Caitlin’s voice. I found many quotable quotes. I think the story is told with a lot of creativity. The sense of immediacy was brilliant; I did feel as though I was right there with these people. Even though I was rooting for Caitlin, I was able to feel empathy for all the charac I really liked this book. Mostly, I loved Caitlin’s voice, a child’s voice, an adult who remembers childhood looking back. She’s great. She’s what makes the book special. I think the writing is beautiful, and that’s also Caitlin’s voice. I found many quotable quotes. I think the story is told with a lot of creativity. The sense of immediacy was brilliant; I did feel as though I was right there with these people. Even though I was rooting for Caitlin, I was able to feel empathy for all the characters, even as I got very angry at some of them. Powerfully told story!

I identified so, so much, even though virtually all Caitlin’s biographical details differ from my own. I was almost completely sucked in and greatly emotionally affected. It wasn’t an easy read for me, but it was thoroughly enjoyable.

The included pictures are wonderful. I couldn’t tell if they were paintings or photos but I thought they perfectly complemented the story, and added more to the atmosphere than words alone could do.

Gritty, grim, funny, mostly sad, mostly realistic, though the way the story unfolded did irk me and did keep me from giving it a possible 5 stars or at least 4 ½ stars.

Re the ending and events leading up to the ending:

(view spoiler)

I notice many people have this shelved as young adult, but my library has this shelved in the adult books section, and I agree with my library. Despite the age of the main character, I think that this is a novel written for adults, though I do think it would be fine for many readers 12+.

I do recommend this to adults and children who like child characters, people who long for more family, people who’ve had trauma, young people who are GLBT, and people who like dark and quirky coming of age stories. I wouldn’t necessarily recommend this to young people who are living in poverty or below middle class, or foster kids or those kids with no or little family. I thought I might when I was reading but I changed my mind.

I wanted to know more of what would happen and what had already happened that the reader was not told, but I’m also fine with some vagueness and using my own imagination about Caitlin’s adult life. ...more

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Feb 11, 2016 Doug Bradshaw rated it liked it

What a great quick read. The writing flows well, sometimes beautiful, the descriptions and metaphors created by the exotic creatures and sometimes even the bland day-to-day fish in the aquarium, added a cozy dimension to the story, a feeling of warmth and protection, a perfect place for a lonely old man to become best friends with a lonely young girl. All of that was so appealing. And yet:

(view spoiler) ...more

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Aug 15, 2015 PattyMacDotComma rated it it was amazing · review of another edition

Recommends it for: literature lovers, teen angst

Shelves: chcc-library

4.5★

I like David Vann’s style. Even when his stories are dark, there are small sparks of hope – particularly in the kids. The worse the characters behave, the more they need forgiveness. How much is too much? What can be forgiven and what can’t?

Caitlin is a lonely 12-year old who lives with her single mum, Sheri, a dock worker, who has just started dating Steve.

Caitlin jealously tries to ignore Steve, just her mother’s latest man, but can’t help being attracted by his inclusive conversations. 4.5★

I like David Vann’s style. Even when his stories are dark, there are small sparks of hope – particularly in the kids. The worse the characters behave, the more they need forgiveness. How much is too much? What can be forgiven and what can’t?

Caitlin is a lonely 12-year old who lives with her single mum, Sheri, a dock worker, who has just started dating Steve.

Caitlin jealously tries to ignore Steve, just her mother’s latest man, but can’t help being attracted by his inclusive conversations. And she’s been befriended by an old guy at the aquarium that she visits every afternoon after school, waiting for her mother to get off work.

Caitlin is open to learning everything there is to know, by studying the fish; Sheri is determined to hide as much as she can; Steve is struggling to be a cheerful middleman; the old man is a sympathetic shoulder for Caitlin; and then there’s Shalini - this dusky, spicy, lush Indian girl who is Caitlin’s first real crush and vice-versa. They are a joyous pair indeed.

As her past is revealed, Sheri freaks out, and becomes agitated and abusive, attempting to show Caitlin how much she suffered herself as a child. Sheri blows hot and cold, and Caitlin responds, adoring but terrified. She feels as confined as the fish she loves. Of their small apartment:

“Back in our aquarium, as territorial and easily found as any fish. We had only four places to hide in this tank: the couch, the bed, the table, and the bathroom. If you checked those four spots, you’d always find us . . . The only question was who was outside, looking in.”

She has a lot on her mind for a 12-year-old, but mostly she’s scared of her mother disappearing.

“I had nightmares all the time in which she was underneath a crane in the port and one of those huge containers flying through the air above her. We know fish are always on guard, hiding at the mouth of a cave or in seaweed or clung to coral, trying to look invisible, Their ends could come from anywhere, at any time, a larger mouth out of the dark and all instantly gone. But aren’t we the same? A car accident at any moment, a heart attack, disease, one of those containers coming loose and falling through the sky, my mother below and not even looking up, seeing and feeling nothing, just the end.”

I liked the way the everyday ‘normalness’ of Steve is the magnet that pulls the others together. We don’t know him, but we sure see his effect on everyone else. Troubled they all may be, but I think Caitlin is going to be okay. ...more

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Oct 16, 2014 Esil rated it it was amazing

Shelves: netgalley

I was very lucky to get a free copy of this novel from the publisher through Netgalley. I have never read anything by Vann and he was not even on my radar, so what a treat to read this wonderful book. It is a quick read and Vann's writing is quite sparse -- deceptively simple. But he is so skillful at conveying anger, pain, tension and love between this small cast of characters. There is nothing unusual from a literary point of view about the underlying story of Caitlin and her mother and their ...more

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Jan 08, 2016 Lynne rated it it was amazing

A beautiful case study in mental health and mental illness. I would characterize this book in the YA category but I'm glad it wasn't because I probably would have passed on it. The relationship between two twelve year olds was beautiful but surprising how intense it is at that young age. I had a hard time relating to the mother, even though I'm also a single mother, because I would always bite back my pride and move past my history for the betterment of my kids. Still, this book had me emotional ...more

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About David Vann

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Published in 19 languages, David Vann’s internationally-bestselling books have won 15 prizes, including best foreign novel in France and Spain and, most recently, the $50,000 St. Francis College Literary Prize 2013, and appeared on 70 Best Books of the Year lists in a dozen countries. He has written for the Atlantic Monthly, Esquire, Outside, Men’s Health, Men’s Journal, The Sunday Times, The Obse ...more

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“Anything is possible with a parent. Parents are gods. They make us and they destroy us. They warp the world and remake it in their own shape, and that's the world we know forever after. It's the only world. We can't see what it might have looked like otherwise.” — 23 likes

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