Slaughtertown Circus

by K.M. Tepe

Xander is boring. He spends his boring life working for minimal pay (and even less respect) as a data entry clerk. After he’s fired from his job, Xander finds himself lost, poor, and alone; until he meets a stripping clown known only as “Marbles”.

Marbles decides to spice up Xander’s life a bit by sleeping with him, but Xander is unaware that clown sex comes with a very unexpected STD. Xander soon learns that his new friend has an agenda of her own. After the entire clown world, Kermisendia, has gone up in flames, Marbles, the daughter of the Leader of Kermisendia, is sent to the Earthly dimension to gather an army and claim a new home for the species, no matter the cost.

Join Xander, Marbles, and the rest of the extra-terrestrial clown freaks on a big-top adventure through the funhouse mirror as Xander learns that clowns might not really be that funny after all…

200 pages, Paperback

First published April 13, 2014

About the author

Spawned 1989 in the Midwest. Throughout her life, her main crushes were predominantly cartoon characters. Now, when she’s not staring blankly at a word document, Tepe is busy writing, acting, or working on different forms of art. She enjoys long walks on the beach, romantic poetry, and poking dead things with a stick.

Reviews

[Janie · Rating 4 out of 5]

Are you bored?  Sick and tired of being a pee-on?  How long has it been since you last laughed hysterically?  You might be a lackluster resident of Slaughtertown.   Why don't you do yourself a favor and lose the "S?"  It's simple.  Find a real clown (not an ass-clown) and get crazy.  Hot honkin' boobies!   BECOME A CLOWN!!!!  Make balloon animals out of yer ... HERRRNK!!!  Ooops.  Confetti.  This book is so much better than the old Barnum and Bailey.  Trust me.  Smell this flower, and pass me the salt.  My coffee is getting cold.

[Ms. Nikki · Rating 5 out of 5]

Slaughtertown Circus is a winner on all fronts; pacing (something was going on constantly), characters (some of them were so frickin' hilarious!), storyline (creative), and believability.

This read had me laughing out loud and re-reading lines. Outrageously unreal moments made everyday by this author's writing skill and storytelling.

This story definitely hit all the right spots at the right time. I loved the clowns!

A very imaginative read that I suggest you check out. I'm sure you'll enjoy your time in Laughtertown.

*I was given a copy in exchange for a honest review*

Check out www.HorrorAfterDark.com

[Jesse Wheeler · Rating 5 out of 5]

Many years ago I saw a film that has stuck with me as the quintessential representation of Clowns. This film was Killer Klowns from Outer Space. Since that film I have dreamed of a war. A war between clowns and humans, and K.M. Tepe delivers in blood soaked cotton-candy caked droves. Reading SlaughterTown Circus was like licking the bladed side of a ban-saw rainbow lolipop that tastes like the Master Blaster's boot heel, sprinkled with a sugary pinch of Shakes the Clown visits Willy Wonka's Fuck Shack. Fuckin' sweet!
The idea of Clown sex, and the psychology behind clown sexuality is presented in full High Definition kaleidoscopic color here folks. There's actually a moment in the book where I felt the urge to drop my pants and try to tie my cock into a balloon animal. Because KM Tepe made tying a cock into a balloon animal sound so goddamn good.
There are moments of sweet affection, mixed with maniacal morbidity that only a chick like K.M. Tepe can write. She has proven herself as a killer Bizarro author with her contributions to previous Strangehouse anthologies, Zombie Zombie Brain Bang, and Strange Fucking Stories. Her first feature novel proves she is a brilliant author, period. This book has it all. Transvestites, amputees, cotton candy feces, deep fried corn-dog dicks, vandalism, and so much more. You think you know clowns...? You don't know shit till you read Slaughtertown Circus.

[Kris Lugosi · Rating 5 out of 5]

I was very pleased to hear that Tepe was coming out with her own full length novel, after having read some of her shorts in Strangehouse anthologies. I love her short stories and now having read SLAUGHTERTOWN CIRCUS, I can safely say she has solidified herself as a very talented author in my book!

On planet Kermisendia rulers Lefty Lucy and Righty Tighty have given birth to a beautiful baby clown girl Marbles. Marbles was born among her siblings which she bravely fought and slaughtered to become The One. The One who will come to Earth and make a suitable place for her clown brethren to live while their home planet burns to the ground. Marbles infiltrates Earth as a stripper "dressed" as a clown using her seductive ways to turn unsuspecting human males into clowns to join in her army against the humans!

Meet Xander...our unsuspecting male human. Super not happy with his job, his looks, his life in general. Things are drab and boring in Xander's life, so when he meets Marbles, the sexy clown stripper, lets just say a bit of color is added to his cheeks. Marbles is one hot piece of ass and she knows it! Strutting around in her sexy short shorts and polka dotted bras, her perfect makeup giving her a flawless white complexion. After she seduces our fuddy duddy of a human, fucks him, sucks him and calls it a day.... things start to happen. Xander realizes pretty quickly that his one night stand was anything but casual. As is hair turns orange, his skin becomes paler and paler, Xander is not feeling like himself. Other than the visual physical changes happening to his body; out of nowhere laughing attacks, balloon inflated penises that shoot confetti cum, and awkward as fuck clown sex are just the tip of the iceberg of side effects from having sex with a real clown and poor Xander exhibits them all as becomes a full blown Clown himself.

Through the help of his new friends Dusty and Marbles and the other Clown crew, Xander begins to understand his place in the Clown Vs. Human take over. With some coaxing and the love of a newly turned woman named Millie, Xander's dull existence becomes anything but and ensues is an amazing epic romp through the clowntastic genius mind of K.M. Tepe.

Tepe's character development is flawless throughout. Each clown, person, universe works perfectly together and is incredibly original in thought. The carnal side of the Clowns is gory and violent and a perfect balance to the comedy and hilarity of all the situations in this book. The pace and timing don't let up, I mean the opening scene is clown sex,,,need I say more?

[Pedro Proença · Rating 5 out of 5]

First, let's get this out of the way:

The people on the cover should be played in a possible movie adaptation of this book by: Young Peter Weller, the brunette from "Mean Girls" and The Rock.

Now, the book:

IT'S AWESOME! MOTHERFUCKIN' AWESOME!

A race of extradimensional clowns wants to wipe the humankind of the face of the Earth. Xander, a mild-mannered dork who just got fired from his boring ass job, is turned into one of them and recruited the most fun way possible (Spoiler alert: Sex. Sex with clowns turns you into a clown).

Tepe's writing is fucking hilarious, and the book is just so much fun. From babies being dipped in scorching melted caramel tanks to people being cut down by ballon chainsaws, this book has everything.

Another winner from Strangehouse

[Rodney · Rating 5 out of 5]

I have read a few shorts from K.M. Tepe in the past and I liked them, but I am honestly blown away by what she has done with Slaughtertown Circus. I can't really think of a book that I would call both fun and flawless until now. This was hilarious, but also had so much depth to it.
The pacing was stellar. It grabbed me and didn't let go. I am also very impressed at how many dimensions there were to the characters. The physical aspects of the clown race were thorough and amazingly creative, given more than enough relevance to make them believable.
The author has achieved the perfect mix of everything I enjoy in a book, without it ever being tedious or overdone. Frankly, the book kicks ass. If you read bizarro at all, you need to read this one!

[John Bruni · Rating 5 out of 5]

You think you know all about clowns? Well, think again. You will learn more than you ever wanted to know. They're not human, you see, and Xander, the poor schlub protagonist of this novel, is about to find out all about them. Ordinarily, I don't care for clown stories, but this one is so completely different that it's amazing. You'll never be able to look at them the same way again.

[Shadow Girl · Rating 5 out of 5]

I didn’t know what to expect from this book, but I am overjoyed with what I got. The story is so unique, and so much fun to read! It hooked me right away. Come see the full review & join in on the discussion at BBB -
http://beckisbookblog.wordpress.com/2...

[Stay Fetters · Rating 3 out of 5]

"Yeah, when clowns throw up, they upchuck those weird snake things that people put in nut cans. How do they even get in there, man?"
The war of Humans Vs. Clowns has been an ongoing battle for decades and it's time for the Clowns to claim what belongs to them. The world might be a wee bit big, so we'll start smaller. A small town named Laughtertown is the perfect place to make your dreams come alive.
Xander lives a very boring life. He wakes up, goes to work, comes home, and goes to sleep. A continuous life filled with dread. Not knowing that very soon his life will change forever.
Going into work and getting fired, he decides drinks will save his day. Walking into a strange place called Doc's, he meets Billy. The man that will save him from life.
Hearing his sob story and inviting him to stay with him. Xander starts looking up in the world.
To cheer Xander up, Billy takes him out for a night on the town and he introduces him to the world of fetish stripping. He loses his mind over this one girl dressed as a clown, the lovely Marbles. Just so happens that she knows Billy.... very intimately.
For the first time in a very long time, Xander beds Marbles and it blows his mind. A little tidbit is that she gave him something. Worse than any kind of std. He starts slowly turning into a clown. His skin turns white, his eyes are brighter and his hair is bright orange. Let the freaking out and overtaking the world begin.
Being a clown will change your life in a very fun way. You puke can snakes, you snot maple syrup, you number one fruit punch and number two sweet delicious cotton candy. Beware you you intake, it could make you speechless.
This is one messed up kind of story. It was weird, wacky, and even hilarious. It just wasn't as ridiculous as I hoped. Still a fast, and great read to take to another dimension.
And wait.... Do you smell that?!?....Corn Dogs!!!

[Melanie Catchpole · Rating 5 out of 5]

Really nice read. Different from any other clown story I've read. Liked all the clown references, got those in nicely. Confetti cum, *giggles*

[Jason Stryker · Rating 5 out of 5]

I'm never eating cotton candy again! Alright...I lie. But I won't eat one of those giant bags without thinking, "Man, how big was the clown who made this".

Being a fan of bizarro, cult films (Death Bed: The Bed That Eats being something I hold in high regard as genius), and generally being that awkward guy who likes most things that most people cringe at; I was extremely excited to read this joy of a book.

What K.M. Tepe did in this book was far something further than I expected. I thought I would just crack it open, and read through it, having a distorted good old-fashioned time. What I received was something better. At the foundation was a character I could relate to; understand why life had become such a dull mess, something that all of us have been through in one facet or another. Which leads us to a bartender. Who hasn't been drunk and spilled their life story to a bartender? At least I hope I'm not the only one. Now when a clown offers to have sex with you, that's when it gets out of the ordinary.

I don't want to spoil too much of the story, but I can guarantee with every page you turn, the story becomes more gripping. As the characters evolve into giggling messes, applying globs of foundation, and doing awkward things with their members (that hopefully medical treatments can do for me in the future), the likability of them still stands tall. You will find yourself applauding the clowns as they dispatch of those measly humans in creative ways.

I would instantly recommend this book to someone who enjoys weird, but also wants emotion splashed with honking (things inside of bras) and inflating (the less attractive things inside Michael Jordan's marketed boxer briefs).

Clowns from an alternate dimension, strippers that are astronomically better than a normal fetish club, and dispatching people with balloons. I really don't think I need to say more.

I have to go pee in my friend's fruit punch quick to make him understand why he needs to read this...

[Russell Holbrook · Rating 5 out of 5]

Now I know the truth about clowns! Awesome! This book really is truly wonderful. It's creative, inventive and fun as hell to read. I kinda wish I could sing the praises of this book in some kind of quasi-intellectual, academic manner, but, instead I'll just be a fan and say that this book freakin' rules!
The presence of an active voice narrator was an interesting choice, in my opinion. That made it feel like I was listening to a friend tell me the story. The pace went from fast to frantic and built to a climactic ending. My favorite part of the story was learning how people become mimes. Wow.

I enjoyed the insane odyssey that the characters went on. I especailly liked the ending and I hope there will be a sequel. (Please write a sequel!)

[William Tea · Rating 4 out of 5]

Laughtertown does not live up to its name. It's drab, dreary place where people move through monotonous routines instead of actual lives, and no one exemplifies that reality better than office drone Xander. That is, until he meets Dusty and Marbles who take him to the coolest strip club in the history of recreational nudity, wherein every kind of fetish you can think of is indulged, from BBWs to trans women to amputees to women who've had their bodies modded to resemble extraterrestrials. Oh, and clowns. Of course.

See, Marbles is a clown. Not just A clown. THE clown. The leader of the clown invasion. 'Cause clowns aren't human, dontcha know? Clowns are aliens from another dimension. And Xander is about to become their newest recruit.

From the moment K.M. Tepe's "Slaughtertown Circus" opens with a bravura sequence of simultaneously horrific and hilarious clown birth (FYI: they're born as a litter, but immediately begin fighting one another for dominance, as only the strongest clownling is permitted to survive), it proves itself a lean, wildly entertaining page-turner that drags you by the scruff of your neck at a rocket-propelled pace. The premise is fun, the mythology richly developed, and the characters will stay with you, especially Marbles. Lusty and charismatic, she remains eminently charming even when she's callously disregarding your emotions or advocating genocide.

Besides the basic conflict of humans-versus-evil alien clowns (then again, are they evil? yeah, kinda... but WHO CARES?!?) and the inherent dread that even the most placid clown tends to illicit from us mere mortals (personally, I've never had a problem with clowns; their inherent creepiness is actually something I relish, and I've even found some of the female ones cute... but, hey, I'm a weirdo, so whaddaya want?), there's a more subtle element of horror in "Slaughtertown Circus," too. Tepe uses the framework of vampire fiction here, substituting sex for blood-sucking (ironic, considering it's essentially an analogue for sex anyway) to tell a tale of transformation.

Tepe's clowns are living embodiments of the id unleashed. And after an all-too-brief carnal liaison with Marbles herself, Xander (the lucky bastard) begins to change into one of them. And there's horror in that, because okay, sure, you're having more fun as a clown. But, also, your tastes are changing, and I don't just mean trivial things like salt suddenly tasting like sugar. Did you like country music in your past life? Rap? Pop? Well, chances are you'll find your only interested in calliope now. Sure, it's nice to take more enjoyment out of life, but to suddenly find things funny you never did before, that suggests a horrifying loss of identity. It's not just your body that's changing, it's your mind; when the transformation is complete, are you even you anymore, or are you dead, replaced by somebody else? It's like "Invasion of the Body Snatchers," only instead of showing no emotions, these doppelgangers' emotions are turned all the way up to eleven.

The final third of the book moves perhaps too quickly. One wishes the book were a bit longer, to give Tepe's story more room to breathe. Then again, it's hard to deny how well the rapid, no-frills pace echoes the frantic spasticity of her chaotic protagonists. With a misanthropic worldview and a conversational tone (so often it feels less like you're reading a story and more like the author is right there in front of you, telling it to you as one would tell an anecdote from life), Tepe has created a weird, wild, wonderful story with an intriguing mythos which, with an ending that's practically begging for a sequel, cries out for further exploration. And it's not just the ending that's begging for a sequel; I'm begging for one too.