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My Undoing: Love in the Thick of Sex, Drugs, Pornography, and Prostitution

3.22  ·  Rating details ·  155 Ratings  ·  23 Reviews
For the first time, porn legend Aiden Shaw takes fans behind-the-scenes to the gay adult film world that made him a star. My Undoing ventures from locales such as Los Angeles, San Francisco, New York, and London, to the sets of premiere studios like Falcon, Catalina, and Studio 200. Yet, this is not the typical adult film memoir, where stars drop names and titillate reader ...more
Paperback, 320 pages
Published May 24th 2006 by Running Press Adult (first published May 23rd 2006)
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Mar 21, 2011 rated it did not like it
I recently finished reading Aiden Shaw's autobiography - though I am rather skeptical about how much of this is factual information considering the rampant amount of drug he reports would leave anyone bereft of a memory - My Undoing: Love in the Thick of Sex, Drugs, Pornography, and Prostitution. Given the amount I read, it really is quite remarkable that this particular work has left me mulling over its content for quite sometime.

I should preface my rant by stating that I read more than half th
Sean Kennedy
Apr 15, 2015 rated it did not like it
Yeah, so this is kind of interesting in a "let's take this person as a completely reprehensible character" kind of way, also in a "hopefully I'll never meet this person in real life" way as well. Aiden Shaw probably wishes he was alive in Byron's time, seeing himself as a nihilistic drug-fucked morally-bankrupt artiste. Who is cooler than you. But by the end of this book I felt like I needed a shower. But not because of the sex. Because he just comes across as a user and manipulator. Granted, I ...more
Dec 05, 2009 rated it did not like it
a narcissistic exploration in vapidity.
Dec 08, 2009 rated it did not like it
An uninteresting, poorly constructed glorifcation of a life that shouldn't be glorified at all. Nothing but blatant name-dropping, casual sex, and rampant drug consumption without any self, social or moral exploration. I don't decry the life of a porn star, of a sexual deviant, of a drug addict - I love porn, sex and drugs - but there's nothing here but a rambling timeline. The narrative was non-existant, the growth was minimal, and the overall impact was nil.

To take it a step further, Shaw take
Oct 08, 2007 rated it did not like it
Shelves: memoirs, gay_way
As posted in []:

Ok, I'm not one of those people who go crazy or rave about a gay porn star, especially if they're well-endowed. Ask me who is Tom Chase or Chad Hunt and I'll be blinking my clueless eyes.

Anyways, what led me to buy this memoir of Aidan Shaw and waste my time, I have no idea and I don't think I'll get those wasted hours back. I think I got this book because I had read Shaw's books before. So, I thought that his memoir would be interesting.

You know how some p
Aug 15, 2009 rated it did not like it
Another book I read for the bookclub. I was interested to read something he wrote when I heard he was writing. I will admit I had a crush on him when I was younger and was watching his porn videos. To hear of his background and what he did with his education was just sad. Most men you read or hear got into porn did it because they were trying to escape a terrible childhood or physical abuse by a parent. He had quite a few opportunities and yet seemed to throw them all away for drugs. I don't kno ...more
Jul 04, 2009 rated it it was ok
I gave this book two stars because the writing isn't all that great, though it is better than you would expect considering. The content, however, is interesting. It is shocking, sad and a bit surreal. It's the stuff of a movie, but it is real. Shaw gives the reader a glimpse into his life as a gay porn star, a life packed with lots of sex and lots of drugs. Sometimes it was a little difficult for me to believe that I was reading a true account of someone's life. This definitely isn't the highest ...more
Dec 16, 2008 rated it did not like it
Shelves: justbad

I thought it would be interesting to read "the life of a porn star" but this was awfully written and incoherent. Shaw is vapid and boring - at least in his book.
Andrew Sherbert
Jun 28, 2017 rated it did not like it
Wow. From one washed up porn star to another (You). I actually know this whole book train your trying to ride on but it's way off track. FIRST of all, a very large percentage of good looking guys in LA and San Francisco, ( Hell,you don' even have to be good looking if your young or if you have a big member or a tight round ass) We KNOW the ups and downs of the porn industry because we have ALL been there. We also have had trays of coke and ecstasy and crystal and ketomine......etc etc etc.....I ...more
Jan 06, 2015 rated it it was ok
I picked this up because I was interested to read about a gay porn star's life, their interests in the medium and their experience of love. I had seen Shaw on Tumblr as a model and was surprised to learn he did gay porn. When I discovered he had written two biographies I was eager to know more about his life. Call me a sucker for curiosity but I've always been attracted to the darker seedier side of life without actually wanting to take part in any of it. I also wanted to know if porn life was i ...more
Daniel Lee
Dec 14, 2008 rated it liked it
I love biographies. In Shaw's, he escapes what pop stars, porn stars, heiresses and other often self-important people do in autobiographies, which is, take as a given how interesting they are. As a result, there is a great deal of sincerity in the book, particularly as he discusses his securities, and doing so without self-indulgence. Though very much an able writer who writes with tremendous clarity, what the manuscript needs is just a little more depth in Shaw's self-reflection or rather, some ...more
Aug 18, 2012 rated it it was amazing
Despite his other "life", Aiden Shaw's autobio was a complete pleasure to read. This book wasn't like other autobios where there are separate pinpointed moments in one chapter and a different one in the next... this book read like it was a true novel. There was a flow to it like you (the reader) were actually there standing there and witnessing every moment that had happened. All of the moments becomes like one entire moment and you are not able to put the book down.

Aiden portrays exactly what h
Jun 09, 2010 rated it really liked it
this book gives an interesting snapshot of what it's like to be an hiv+ pornstar who uses drugs nonstop. i always wondered what it was like to "have everything." and from reading the book it seems that having everything is synonymous with being somewhat vapid. i don't mean that in an insulting way. it was a great picture of the type of life one leads doing this type of work.
that being said, it was interesting to see that aiden did have some moments where he realized that something was "wrong,"
Feb 27, 2008 rated it did not like it
pass! despite my love for the person who gifted it to me, i didn't get much out of this book. so this ex porn star and hustler starts having these realizations like "you know, maybe life isn't all about sex and drugs," all the while continuing to make the same choices over and over, including the scintillating photo of himself on the cover. i want to respect his process, and he was probably really hurt growing up (i don't remember if he discussed his childhood sitch), but he seems to be a lot of ...more
A.J. Llewellyn
May 12, 2010 rated it really liked it
Shelves: i-own-a-copy
I enjoyed Shaw's book because it resonates on every single page. After about 40 pages I got a kick out of his complete and profound narcisissm because I have yet to meet a porn star who ISN'T totally self-absorbed. But the truth of sex, love and gay men is apparent on every page.
I wish all authors of M/M would read this author's books. He runs the gamut from great reviews to poor. I would have given him a five except at the end, I am not in love with him...he is hard to like but equally, hard to
Aug 11, 2010 rated it it was ok
I guess after so many chapters it just got too numbing to see how much drugs and sex one person can really have over the course of a year; while also reading everyone else is doing it to and in the end he still doesn't understand the messed up decision he returns to. Meh! I might have believed it more if it were fiction.
Kevin Douglas
Nov 06, 2013 rated it it was ok
I was so disappointed. I wanted to like and it to be as sexy and interesting as the lovely Mr. Shaw. I don't think I finished it.
Mandy Faust
Dec 10, 2010 rated it it was ok
Shelves: read-in-2010
Should have known this would be a train wreck....and not in a good way.
Keita Ito
Sep 27, 2012 rated it it was amazing
I never put much thought into what porn stars did when they aren't filming but this is a good look of what happens in one man's day to day life.
Oct 21, 2007 rated it did not like it
a cheesy unapologetic memoir ...

Jon Rybka-Wachhaus
Oct 24, 2014 rated it did not like it
I had to stop reading it. I am sure it was better then it was but I could not get thru all the drugs. Too close to home.
May 04, 2013 rated it it was amazing
great bio
Michael Abernethy
Apr 23, 2008 rated it liked it
Life in porn is tough, brutal and kind of stupid. But Shaw is a surprisingly honest writer and critic of himself. It's an interesting, quick read.
Dave Yan
rated it really liked it
Apr 02, 2013
George Kester
rated it liked it
Apr 15, 2011
rated it it was amazing
Aug 02, 2014
rated it it was amazing
Mar 10, 2013
rated it really liked it
Jan 10, 2017
Christopher Wong
rated it really liked it
Dec 27, 2014
rated it it was ok
Jan 26, 2011
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