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Marriage Isn't for You: It's for the One You Love
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Marriage Isn't for You: It's for the One You Love

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4.25  ·  Rating details ·  95 ratings  ·  29 reviews
What is the best wedding advice you ever received? For author Seth Adam Smith, it was the advice from his father who said, Marriage is not for you. It is about the person you marry. These few words completely changed the way Seth looked at his relationship with his wife-to-be. Because at that moment he realized that an expression of love is not about the person expressing ...more
Hardcover, 48 pages
Published May 9th 2014 by Shadow Mountain
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4.25  · 
Rating details
 ·  95 ratings  ·  29 reviews


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Bonnie Chang
This blog first caught my attention while I overheard it being discussed over the radio. After listening to various caller's opinions I decided to look up the article when I got home. I realized that many of the listeners had taken the words written in the blog literally. The voice that the author had written in the blog was clear but could be interpreted in two very different ways. One way that the blog could be viewed is that marriage is really not for you and that you need to give yourself co ...more
Heidi
With so many marriages ending almost before they begin, the advice in this book is invaluable. And it isn't overly complicated. Basically, the idea is that marriage isn't about you, it's all about the person you marry. It isn't about you being happy, it's about making the other person happy. I seem to remember President Spencer W. Kimball, previous President of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints saying once that selfishness was the greatest threat to marriage, "Every divorce is the ...more
Julia
Sep 01, 2018 rated it liked it
Shelves: help, life
Like so many I came across this due to social media sharing his blog. So I was intrigued. I was expecting more so I'm guessing you need to read some of his other works to get more information. I feel this book is more of a short reminder that should be picked up when you are struggling. As it's a quick reminder of what not to forget. I probably suggest it to someone who feels they've found the one to read it as I believe it would make them think.
Carol (Kimiko)
Sep 29, 2018 rated it liked it
It is alright
Annette
Mar 04, 2018 rated it it was amazing
Best Pro Marriage Book our there! And it has pictures!
Diena Riding
Dec 21, 2017 rated it really liked it
Simple and to the point.
Jinky
May 12, 2014 rated it really liked it
I'm one of the 30 million who saw this on cyberspace.  A few of my Facebook friends had shared the link to the story.  The headline caught my eye, "Having been married only a year and a half, I’ve recently come to the conclusion that marriage isn’t for me", so I clicked to read why (original here).  After reading the article, I found it to be sweet and had a great advice.  That same tender, resonating counsel is now in this book with a few changes (big ones: introduction removed and Walmart phil ...more
Holly (2 Kids and Tired)
May 19, 2014 rated it it was amazing
I remember seeing the original blog post as it floated around the internet. Seth Adam Smith shared the advice that his father gave to him before his marriage. He also, honestly shared an experience when he realized he wasn't following that advice and he realized his actions were affecting his marriage. I thought the post was insightful and I agreed with it.

Marriage isn't about self. Marriage isn't about 50/50. Marriage is about two people each giving 100% of themselves and focusing on loving th
...more
Melanie
May 14, 2014 rated it it was amazing
This is a very short read but the message is powerful! Seth Smith explains the anxiety he felt when he was considering marriage and the thoughts that went through his head: "Was I making the right choice? Would she make me happy?" He took his concerns to his father and was told he was being selfish. His father continued with this advice: "Marriage isn't for you. It's not about you. Marriage is about the person you marry."

He says that advice was shocking and revelatory. He took it to heart and g
...more
Lisa  (Bookworm Lisa)
I was lucky to read the blog post that became this book. I remember at the time how I thought it was profound and well thought out. It resonated with me. I knew that it was a message that could change lives and help marriages. I also believed the words that were written and tried to take them to heart.

When I had the opportunity to read and review the book, there was no question. I want this kind of a book in my home. I want my kids to open it and look through it. None of my children are married,
...more
Shanda
Reading Marriage Isn’t For You literally took me five minutes, yet within that five-minute read is a message that has impacted millions. Such authenticity and honesty carries power, perhaps because those qualities are rare these days. Despite having “marriage” in the title, this book applies to relationships of all types.

While Marriage Isn’t For You would make a great gift for every new couple, make sure you buy a copy for yourself first and keep it visible. When things get tense (and they will)
...more
Shauna
May 08, 2014 rated it it was amazing
"What is the best marriage advice you ever received?
For author Seth Adam Smith, it was the advice from his father, who said, "Marriage isn't for you. It's about the person you marry.""

And that advice goes for all of us!

The book is BEAUTIFULLY put together!

FUN pictures!

AMAZING story of his love for his wife, his fears and anxieties, his wife's love for him that brought him back to a selfless, happier marriage.

I LOVED this thought:

"Marriage isn't for yourself~ you're marrying for a family. Not jus
...more
Heather
May 16, 2014 rated it it was amazing
Short, powerful, beautiful, to the point. Author Adam Smith affirms marriage is not for you, it's for the one you love, for your future children. Taken from his viral blog post, this gift book is wonderful for newlyweds or nearly deads, to remind them what marriage is all about. Marriage Isn't For You is chock full of photos, great graphics and perfect fatherly advice. Five stars. I loved it. Sometimes the message hits home when it is compact and tastefully presented. Perfect.
Katie Robinson
Jul 25, 2014 rated it really liked it
This is a very short book but no matter where you are in life or who you are I think this book has a message for everybody. No matter if you are single, married, or divorced this book has a message for you. The message is simple: in life it's better to live selflessly than selfishly and the paradox is that the more love you out out there, the more you get back.
shan
Nov 03, 2015 rated it liked it
This book reminds that Love is a selfless emotion and should encourage us to give, not ask what we can receive. To me, marriage is about making a choice to Love that person unconditionally forever. I'm not saying I am the best practitioner of this, but it helps to always have that mindset and to remind yourself of the true qualities of Love.
alisonwonderland
This "very short read" is a book version of a blog post Smith wrote in 2013 that went viral. It was a perfect reminder to me about what marriage and love are all about - especially on this Valentine's Day.
Melinda Tracy
May 04, 2014 rated it it was amazing
Cute, short book. It was spectacular to read how marriage ISN'T for you. It was refreshing to hear something opposite then what the world preaches. This would be a great read for anyone: single, engaged, or married.
Ryceejo
Jun 24, 2014 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
They made the blog post into a book. Great idea if that is what makes this message spread to a larger audience. Simple truths we should know but definitely need to hear because society in general has forgotten them.
Julia
Aug 12, 2014 rated it liked it
Great advice for any relationship, not just for marriage. I felt like this was more of a picture book though and less of a real relationship help. I feel like the author could have taken this so much farther and made it a really great and uplifting read.
Danni
Dec 26, 2014 rated it it was amazing
My mom in law bought this for my brother in law for Christmas. It was a short book so I stole it and read it while everyone was opening gifts. I learned a lot. Mostly that I am pretty selfish in my marriage. I guess everything takes work.
Summers
Dec 09, 2014 rated it really liked it
Cute little book with a great message!
Lacey
May 05, 2014 rated it it was amazing
Straight from thr blog post that went viral, this book is a beautiful reminder of the sanctity of marriage. if only more people could apply this to their marriages, maybe we would see less divorce.
Jocelin
Jul 10, 2014 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Really sweet insight from a man's perspective on marriage.
Venisha Ready
Sep 05, 2014 rated it liked it
Shelves: nonfiction
This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers. To view it, click here.
Cynthia
Dec 08, 2014 rated it really liked it
Coffee table book. Cute.
Donna
Jun 19, 2014 rated it really liked it
Highly recommend for couples before marriage. Short, easy read.
Cheri
May 16, 2014 rated it it was amazing
Shelves: inspiration
A short book but with very good advice. I have been married for over twenty-two years and I learned that I can be doing better in my marriage by looking past myself. Great book.
Caryn
Jan 31, 2015 rated it it was amazing
Loved the pictures, and the words are so true!
Catherine
Aug 02, 2014 rated it it was amazing
A quick little read with a great message. A reminder that we need to focus more on our spouse's needs, rather than just worrying about our own.
Valory Fletcher
rated it it was amazing
Jul 08, 2014
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Seth Adam Smith is a best-selling, award-winning author and blogger whose writings have been translated into over thirty languages and featured on the Huffington Post, Good Morning America, Fox News, CNN, the Today show, Forbes, and many other news outlets around the world. In 2015, his book "Your Life Isn’t for You" was awarded a gold medal for inspirational memoir.

A survivor of a suicide attemp
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“Paradoxically, the more you truly love that person, the more love you receive.” 2 likes
“Marriage isn't for you. It's not about you. Marriage is about the person you marry.” 1 likes
More quotes…