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He Did You a Favor: A Smart Girl's Guide to Breaking Up, Waking Up, and Discovering the Gift of You

Debra Rogers

3.94 · Rating details · 16 ratings · 4 reviews

Some guy has taken a giant sledgehammer to your heart and you have to clean up the mess. You hurt, big-time. You feel alone, scraping for answers in the bottom of your third tub of "Chocolate Therapy" ice cream. You think you'll never find anyone as good as he was, e-ver. But what if... he did you a favor? He Did You a Favor is an empowering, humorous, hands-on guide with ...more

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Paperback, 250 pages

Published December 9th 2013 by Did You a Favor, Inc. (first published November 11th 2013)

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Start your review of He Did You a Favor: A Smart Girl's Guide to Breaking Up, Waking Up, and Discovering the Gift of You

Feb 13, 2014 Kathleen Kelly rated it it was amazing

Alright, my broken-hearted sisters, put down the Ben & Jerrys and listen up. This ones for you. If the love of your life recently told you he loves someone else or if the man of your dreams just told you it isnt you, its him: dont fear, Debra Rogers has come to your rescue. So, wipe your tears, take a hot bath and read He Did You A Favor, because, lets face it, he probably did.

With an in-your-face style, Rogers walks us through the worst parts of a breakup. She allows us to cry, even
Alright, my broken-hearted sisters, put down the Ben & Jerry’s and listen up. This one’s for you. If the love of your life recently told you he loves someone else or if the man of your dreams just told you it isn’t you, it’s him: don’t fear, Debra Rogers has come to your rescue. So, wipe your tears, take a hot bath and read He Did You A Favor, because, let’s face it, he probably did.

With an in-your-face style, Rogers walks us through the worst parts of a breakup. She allows us to cry, even encourages it! She explains how to throw a raging pity party, but also how to get back up after the emotional fall. With detailed and very thoughtful ideas (and even new ice cream flavors to try), Rogers has even created a wonderful itinerary for said pity party. But once those tears are dried and the cookie crumbs are swept up, she helps us learn how to move on and become stronger.

Next, Rogers details each type of man that women are drawn to (and most likely to break our hearts), why we fall for them, their excuses for wanting to end the relationship, and even how to handle “the other woman”. The best part about all of this, true life excerpts from women just like you and workbook exercises that will seriously help heal your torn, weak and stomped on heart. And in the end, Rogers emphasizes the importance of self-worth and the uselessness of self-deprecation.

With funny anecdotes, personal experience and a no-bullshit approach, this book is a humorous necessity for any woman with a gaping wound in her heart. Personally, this book couldn’t have come at a better time. Coming out of a break-up myself, but one of a slightly different caliber (I left willingly with dignity and no love left for him), this book helped in ways I thought I already had handled. If you are still weeping into your cheesecake and stalking him on Facebook, I’m 100 percent positive this book will help you so much more.
The best part too, is Rogers writes to convince us newly single, sad and lonely women that we are worth something. She strives to teach us how to regain our confidence and embrace our worth. We will find Mr. Right (and she even has tips to help!). And she teaches us how to pass up Mr. Not So Right, Mr. Right Now, or Mr. Totally Wrong.

These are lessons we all need to learn, so light some candles, pour a glass of wine (or scotch, or milk, or whatever fits your fancy) and crack open Debra Rogers’ book. Written with class and eloquence, this book also has enough hilarity to make you laugh so hard you’ll forget what (or whom) you were sad about in the first place.

This isn’t the end, it’s just a new beginning. So, what are you waiting for? Quit obsessing and missing him, start working toward a better you. Isn’t it time you realize that really, He Did You A Favor?

Guest Reviewer: Katie Kelly
A copy of this book was provided for review and there was no monetary compensation. ...more

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Jan 20, 2014 Kathleen (Kat) Smith rated it it was amazing

Shelves: adult-humor, chick-literature, christian-living, christian-self-help, non-fiction, reference, self-help

"A breakup can sometimes send us reeling. Whether we were together for 10 years or 10 weeks, it can leave us doubting ourselves and our ability to ever find enough ice cream (or pork carnitas) to make us feel better. Even if we initiated it, or thought that it wouldn't be a big deal, a breakup can knock us off course in big ways and small.

Nearly everyone has had a breakup that has shaken them to the core. To add to the agony, often times they feel like they should be getting over it better, "A breakup can sometimes send us reeling. Whether we were together for 10 years or 10 weeks, it can leave us doubting ourselves and our ability to ever find enough ice cream (or pork carnitas) to make us feel better. Even if we initiated it, or thought that it wouldn't be a big deal, a breakup can knock us off course in big ways and small.

Nearly everyone has had a breakup that has shaken them to the core. To add to the agony, often times they feel like they should be getting over it better, more quickly, or with fewer tears or obsessive thoughts. They feel that having a hard time with it somehow makes them weak or unhealthy.

If the relationship was meaningful, there's virtually no way to avoid the sting of a breakup completely. And it would probably make you less human if you didn't feel something. But what do you want that something to be? And how do you want to use it to forge ahead?

"It's natural for us to turn to our friends for sympathy and advice. A good friend can empathize and help us feel like we're not the loser we think we are in the moment. During her years researching the power of friendship for her book The Friendship Fix, she has learned that friendship can be downright magical in its own right. But in the wake of an earth shattering romantic breakup, sometimes even the best of friends can't do much to dig us out of our hole.

This is just one of the things you can learn from this time period. If breakups are bound to make you feel something, there's a big and meaningful difference between that something being pure misery, and that something being new understanding of yourself in a way that helps you move forward as a stronger, wiser, and more insightful human being. The latter is a person who knows herself better, and is better situated to take the steps needed to find more fulfilling relationships. Virtually all of us would choose that something.

So how do you get there? The answers to those questions fall much more squarely in your control, and by picking up He Did You A Favor, you've taken the first step in choosing to make things better for yourself. But perhaps you're balking at the idea that reading a book can help you. The whole breakup business can tread into downright clichèd territory: from Hollywood ending that have Much-Better Dude Number Two entering stage left the moment Dude Number One is done, to the friends who tell you that someone now you're simply "better off" - when you haven't showered in days.

This book is packed with inspirations, motivation, and step-by-step tips to guide you through this important time in your life. Debra Rogers brilliantly shares her own stories, and those of other women, to help you work through all the stages of breakup recovery. In the pages of this book, you will find others who understand exactly what you're going through and you'll come to realize you're not a loser (even if you did eat that entire tub of chocolate chunk ice cream) - and you're not alone." (excerpt.)

I received He Did You A Favor by Debra Rogers compliments of Book Sparks for my honest review. I did not receive any monetary compensation for a favorable review and the opinions expressed are strictly my own. I only wish I would have had a book like this when I was a teen and going through those difficult moments of high school crushes and even life changing break ups. I think the one thing I loved most about this book is that you can feel like Debra knows what you're going through, how you feel and even adds just the right amount of humor so you can find yourself smiling again. It's not a quick fix, but it's designed to help you see past believing your life is over and that it's all your fault. That you could have done anything to change it. The chapter are designed to be intriguing and fun, like Your Super Sucky Breakup includes such notable topics like He Did You A Favor because You Get to Purge Mr. Not Worthy or He Did You A Favor because His Excuse is Your Ticket to Freedom! All in all, I am so glad I have this because as a parent who is dealing with teen girls, I know I'll be rereading it again and again and even handing this to them as they go through it when it comes. I easily give this one a 4.5 out of 5 stars in my opinion. ...more

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Jan 10, 2014 Gayle Pace rated it it was amazing

REVIEW
At one time or another, all of us ladies have found ourselves wondering if the relationship we're in will work. How many of us have sat and wondered what in the world went wrong.? One relationship may end and you jump back into another one that is the same as before. Have you ever thought, what am I doing wrong or it's my fault.? Maybe you're holding on because you''re afraid to let go. The book may help you reflect, take a second look as to what the problem really is. The author wrote REVIEW
At one time or another, all of us ladies have found ourselves wondering if the relationship we're in will work. How many of us have sat and wondered what in the world went wrong.? One relationship may end and you jump back into another one that is the same as before. Have you ever thought, what am I doing wrong or it's my fault.? Maybe you're holding on because you''re afraid to let go. The book may help you reflect, take a second look as to what the problem really is. The author wrote from the outlook, 'been there, done that'. She knows where you're coming from and what you're going through. The relationship ends and you may find yourself eating right out of the ice cream carton, all the while using up the tissues on the endless tears. The author helps you realize that you are not alone. She will help get you on the right track and help you begin a new life. A new life without that bad boy that treated you like dirt beneath his feet. The book will help with the healing of that broken heart. I believe the author has given anyone who has broken up a new outlook. She helps you reclaim your self worth and stop blaming y\ourself. Ms. Rogers provides the tools, understanding and encouragement that will help you begin anew. She helps you pick yourself up and love yourself. You have to love yourself before you can love anyone else. She adds humor, workbook activities and most of all encouragement. There is a quote in the book that I really liked. "So what if the guy who dumped you did you a huge favor? That, in face he helped you (even if it wasn't intentional) because your relationship with him was complete and it was time to move on to someone better?" The author, Debra Rogers wrote a must read for anyone going through a break up, or has gone through one or a woman who just wants to become a better, more powerful person. This is one of the best "self help" books I've ever read. Ms. Rogers, I applaud you.

I would give this book 5 HEARTS.

I was given a complimentary copy of HE DID YOU A FAVOR by Debra Rogers from SPARKPOINTSTUDIO for my honest opinion.
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Jan 23, 2014 Angela Holtz rated it it was amazing

From Lilac Wolf and Stuff

I usually hate self-help books. Full of platitudes and BS. This book is entertaining and I can see where it actually would be useful. So way to go, Debra!

You may be asking yourself why I'm reading a book about breaking up. Well worry not, my marriage is as strong as ever. I honestly didn't read very closely and thought it was a romantic comedy type book. Imagine my surprise! I really did expect to hate it, but figured I made a promise to my peeps at BooksSparks.

I didn't ...more

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