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Mistress & Master of Restraint #11
Integrated
Warning: Erica Chilson is revising/rewriting/restructuring/editing/formatting the Mistress & Master of Restraint Series in its entirety for release into Print. A few titles will receive updated covers, as well as a more descriptive synopsis. The FINAL editions will vary from those currently in release.
If you are a new reader, and not one who enjoys rereading, then I suggest you ‘wishlist’ or ‘TBR’ the following book & subscribe to Erica Chilson’s website: ericachilson.wordpress.com
However, if you would like to read this title in its current form, and then experience its final edition, or if you have previously purchased this title, an ebook update will become available. You will NOT have to repurchase another ebook copy. Instruction on how to update, and whether or not you need to update to the most current edition, can be found on Erica Chilson’s website under the tab ‘Updated Editions’.
Erica Chilson apologizes for the inconvenience, and hopes that the readers understand her decision to create and publish a professional book worthy of its story and its readers.
*warning will be removed when the Final editions go live, and a new warning will published. If reading this statement, then the Final Editions are not available as of yet*
I embark on a journey of self-realization, redemption, and forgiving oneself…
I’ve struggled since I was thirteen years old to keep myself even. I lost my innocence when I fractured. The childlike part of me was tainted while the dominant part of me overpowered my mind. I’ve lived in a constant state of tug-of-war.
Some call me Master Ez, Dr. Lunatic, Son, Elder Holden, Dad, or husband. Until I integrated I couldn’t simply be called Ezra.
Everyone struggles throughout life. I would know since I counsel a large majority. Imagine a life filled with financial, familial, and romantic problems, but compound that by fighting one’s own mind. Imagine having two halves dueling for control of your mind as you try to merge them into one, to give yourself peace. Mental illness makes the mundane seem trivial, doesn’t it?
With great wealth comes an ease of freedom of choice but an even larger responsibility. I am responsible for all those around me: their happiness, their safety… their torment and punishment and ruination.
Integrated, I finally recognize all the evil deeds I’ve committed in the name of my alters. I must come to terms with my actions, and for the first time ever, I need to accept the responsibility and the consequences.
I’ve set my path of redemption. I’ve asked for forgiveness, and I cannot demand that my victims pardon me. Out of my control, their thoughts on my character are their own… now, a much more difficult task lies ahead… forgiving oneself.
As if a newborn, raw and exposed, wounded and fragile, I must learn who this integrated person is that I don’t truly recognize. The last time I was whole was twenty years ago. I was a child, and now I am a man.
You must learn to walk before you run… I must ask for forgiveness before I can forgive myself… and hopefully, I can learn who I was meant to be along the way.
If you are a new reader, and not one who enjoys rereading, then I suggest you ‘wishlist’ or ‘TBR’ the following book & subscribe to Erica Chilson’s website: ericachilson.wordpress.com
However, if you would like to read this title in its current form, and then experience its final edition, or if you have previously purchased this title, an ebook update will become available. You will NOT have to repurchase another ebook copy. Instruction on how to update, and whether or not you need to update to the most current edition, can be found on Erica Chilson’s website under the tab ‘Updated Editions’.
Erica Chilson apologizes for the inconvenience, and hopes that the readers understand her decision to create and publish a professional book worthy of its story and its readers.
*warning will be removed when the Final editions go live, and a new warning will published. If reading this statement, then the Final Editions are not available as of yet*
I embark on a journey of self-realization, redemption, and forgiving oneself…
I’ve struggled since I was thirteen years old to keep myself even. I lost my innocence when I fractured. The childlike part of me was tainted while the dominant part of me overpowered my mind. I’ve lived in a constant state of tug-of-war.
Some call me Master Ez, Dr. Lunatic, Son, Elder Holden, Dad, or husband. Until I integrated I couldn’t simply be called Ezra.
Everyone struggles throughout life. I would know since I counsel a large majority. Imagine a life filled with financial, familial, and romantic problems, but compound that by fighting one’s own mind. Imagine having two halves dueling for control of your mind as you try to merge them into one, to give yourself peace. Mental illness makes the mundane seem trivial, doesn’t it?
With great wealth comes an ease of freedom of choice but an even larger responsibility. I am responsible for all those around me: their happiness, their safety… their torment and punishment and ruination.
Integrated, I finally recognize all the evil deeds I’ve committed in the name of my alters. I must come to terms with my actions, and for the first time ever, I need to accept the responsibility and the consequences.
I’ve set my path of redemption. I’ve asked for forgiveness, and I cannot demand that my victims pardon me. Out of my control, their thoughts on my character are their own… now, a much more difficult task lies ahead… forgiving oneself.
As if a newborn, raw and exposed, wounded and fragile, I must learn who this integrated person is that I don’t truly recognize. The last time I was whole was twenty years ago. I was a child, and now I am a man.
You must learn to walk before you run… I must ask for forgiveness before I can forgive myself… and hopefully, I can learn who I was meant to be along the way.
451 pages, ebook
First published October 31, 2013
About the author
Erica Chilson
36 books432 followersErica Chilson does not write in the 3rd person, wanting her readers to be her characters. Therefore, writing a bio about herself, is uncomfortable in the extreme.
Born, raised, and here to stay, the Wicked Writer is a stump-jumper, a ridge-runner. Hailing from North Central Pennsylvania, directly on the New York State border; she loves the changes in seasons, the humid air, all the mountainous forest, and the gloomy atmosphere.
Introverted, but not socially awkward, Erica prides herself on thinking first and filtering her speech. There are days she doesn’t speak at all. If it wasn’t for the fact that she lives with her parents, giving her a sense of reality, she would be a hermit, where the delivery man finds her months after expiration.
Reading was an escape, a way to leave a not-so pleasant reality behind. Reading lent Erica the courage she gathered from the characters between the pages to long for a different life. Writing was an instrument of change, evolving Erica into the woman she is today- a better, more mature, more at peace thinker.
Erica has a wicked mind, one she pours out into her creations. Her filter doesn’t allow all of it to erupt, much to her relief. Sarcastic, with a very dark, perverse sense of humor, Erica puts a bit of herself into every character she writes.
Born, raised, and here to stay, the Wicked Writer is a stump-jumper, a ridge-runner. Hailing from North Central Pennsylvania, directly on the New York State border; she loves the changes in seasons, the humid air, all the mountainous forest, and the gloomy atmosphere.
Introverted, but not socially awkward, Erica prides herself on thinking first and filtering her speech. There are days she doesn’t speak at all. If it wasn’t for the fact that she lives with her parents, giving her a sense of reality, she would be a hermit, where the delivery man finds her months after expiration.
Reading was an escape, a way to leave a not-so pleasant reality behind. Reading lent Erica the courage she gathered from the characters between the pages to long for a different life. Writing was an instrument of change, evolving Erica into the woman she is today- a better, more mature, more at peace thinker.
Erica has a wicked mind, one she pours out into her creations. Her filter doesn’t allow all of it to erupt, much to her relief. Sarcastic, with a very dark, perverse sense of humor, Erica puts a bit of herself into every character she writes.
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Displaying 1 - 17 of 17 reviews
November 20, 2013
Master Ez/ Ezra/ Dr. Lunatic
"I embark on a journey of self-realization, redemption, and forgiving oneself..."
This chapter in the AMAZING world of M&M had me in tears. OK, in truth, I probably cry in all of the books, but I felt the hurt deep in my chest. I don't know how else to word it. We are finally getting some peace, resolution, a HEA in a sense!
A BITTERSWEET HEA! What is meant to be, is meant to be. Ezra Integrated, realization of all his past betrayals, lies, and torments are now front and center. No more hiding behind his mental illness. We all know the crimes he's committed against loved ones and consequences others had to endure for him. It was a slap in the face, only because I for one still do not hold him accountable. I turn a blind eye, much like others in this web of insanity. I love him, I can't help it. :)
My is heart is broke, shattered to pieces. Katya and Ez are over!!! I feel like kid who's parents just split. I know it's the right conclusion but it still hurts.
"Heart pounding, I try to savor the last seconds of our marriage as I stare at my wife. Never will I be able to put this feeling into words-the emotion, the pain, the hope, the fear, the excitement... the pure love I feel for my wife in this very moment"
Bittersweet, right? Ez and Cort are finally together. I can't tell you how happy this makes me... Again, bittersweet.
This was a perfect ending to a emotional journey for two soul mates! <3
We're getting HEA's and I can't wait until the next story. BRING me HERO!
I LOVE YOUR MIND, Erica Chilson, The Wicked Writer.
"I embark on a journey of self-realization, redemption, and forgiving oneself..."
This chapter in the AMAZING world of M&M had me in tears. OK, in truth, I probably cry in all of the books, but I felt the hurt deep in my chest. I don't know how else to word it. We are finally getting some peace, resolution, a HEA in a sense!
A BITTERSWEET HEA! What is meant to be, is meant to be. Ezra Integrated, realization of all his past betrayals, lies, and torments are now front and center. No more hiding behind his mental illness. We all know the crimes he's committed against loved ones and consequences others had to endure for him. It was a slap in the face, only because I for one still do not hold him accountable. I turn a blind eye, much like others in this web of insanity. I love him, I can't help it. :)
My is heart is broke, shattered to pieces. Katya and Ez are over!!! I feel like kid who's parents just split. I know it's the right conclusion but it still hurts.
"Heart pounding, I try to savor the last seconds of our marriage as I stare at my wife. Never will I be able to put this feeling into words-the emotion, the pain, the hope, the fear, the excitement... the pure love I feel for my wife in this very moment"
Bittersweet, right? Ez and Cort are finally together. I can't tell you how happy this makes me... Again, bittersweet.
This was a perfect ending to a emotional journey for two soul mates! <3
We're getting HEA's and I can't wait until the next story. BRING me HERO!
I LOVE YOUR MIND, Erica Chilson, The Wicked Writer.
November 5, 2013
Although I've never really like Ezra, I'm glad he FINALLY got his! I have to say, I'm thoroughly confused about "The Game" at this point. I'm now able to realize that these characters all have their good and bad points. I hate that my FAVORITE characters have been made into enemies :( Erica Chilson is AN AMAZING story-teller, and I will patiently wait for the story to be continued. I've never read a series of this magnitude but am SO glad I was able to read Restraint for free - totally HOOKED me into this!
November 10, 2013
Emotional. Gripping. Amazingly written. Pretty much speechless. Erica Chilson out does herself with Integrated! 6 out of 6 stars.
<3 Wicked Reads Review Team<3
<3 Wicked Reads Review Team<3
November 7, 2013
Just when you think Ms. Childson has hit her peak with The Hunter and Faithless she once again ups her game. Integrated is so much more than Erza story. It is Ez, Master EZ, and innconet little Erza become Erza the man. He is his journey for redemption under the acts he commits with mental ill. This book will rock your world, between heart wreacking emtions for a character I loved to hate, to new insights as to why COURT/EZRA are soul mates, to steamy hot sex scene. This book is both a tear jeaker and erotic as hell. I am looking forward to the upcoming books in the series. But this one is going to be hard to top.
Jedi Christy
Jedi Christy
May 27, 2023
Another great story in the saga of Mistress and Masters of restraint. This is the 11th book in the saga of the Master's of the universe game. The story id told be Dr. Ezra Holden-Zeitler a psychiatrist who is sick himself he has 3 personalities of himself and has since he was 13. The personalities were needed to survive the life in the game. He now has been able to merge his personalities and has to now deal with the destruction his other personalities have caused. The journey is tough and he has to deal with the end of his marriage to his wife who he has decimated, a husband who is tired of his behavior and a daughter is following in his demented behavior. He has a lot of fences to mend. There are highs and lows and many of laughs
March 9, 2021
Erica Chilson just gets better and better.
Welcome to Ezra's side of the story. In this installment Erica Chilson leads you on the emotional journey of Ezra coming to reality. As he comes to terms with his past and works toward his future he has to acknowledge his mistakes and the messes he has created and deal with the consequences. Feel his pain and his joy as he tries to find peace and contentment in his life. Erica brings everything to the table again with Ezra and all of his family. I'm already craving more.
Welcome to Ezra's side of the story. In this installment Erica Chilson leads you on the emotional journey of Ezra coming to reality. As he comes to terms with his past and works toward his future he has to acknowledge his mistakes and the messes he has created and deal with the consequences. Feel his pain and his joy as he tries to find peace and contentment in his life. Erica brings everything to the table again with Ezra and all of his family. I'm already craving more.
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May 27, 2023🎁 FREE on Amazon today (4/24/2020)! 🎁
April 28, 2023
Review for Original Integrated
April 28, 2023
REVIEW FOR REVISED INTEGRTATED
May 15, 2023
Review for Original Integrated
September 19, 2015
Finally,
Ezra, I want to hate you, I truly do, but at the same time I love you. You're the most fucked up, flawed, beautiful, sweet, amazing, character that I have ever read about. You almost seem real to be honest. I fell in love with this character, then I grew to have an extreme dislike and now I am back to love/hate. This was a great book and I thoroughly enjoyed myself. WOW!!! You guys are in for it! fan emotional ride, I am not giving away any details. ;) MUST READ!!
Ezra, I want to hate you, I truly do, but at the same time I love you. You're the most fucked up, flawed, beautiful, sweet, amazing, character that I have ever read about. You almost seem real to be honest. I fell in love with this character, then I grew to have an extreme dislike and now I am back to love/hate. This was a great book and I thoroughly enjoyed myself. WOW!!! You guys are in for it! fan emotional ride, I am not giving away any details. ;) MUST READ!!
January 30, 2014
Ugh. So done.
Please, please, please, if you have four or five betas, please make sure that EVERY grammar mistake is corrected before publishing.
I really liked the series to begin with, but the first person narrative drove me nuts. It could have been shortened by 75 percent in third person. As it was, it took twelve books to finally get enough information to say "the hell with it, that's enough."
Please, please, please, if you have four or five betas, please make sure that EVERY grammar mistake is corrected before publishing.
I really liked the series to begin with, but the first person narrative drove me nuts. It could have been shortened by 75 percent in third person. As it was, it took twelve books to finally get enough information to say "the hell with it, that's enough."
November 3, 2013
Review to come !
November 20, 2013
AMAZING!
November 30, 2022
Review for Original Integrated
June 20, 2022
REVIEW FOR REVISED INTEGRTATED
Displaying 1 - 17 of 17 reviews