Ten Commandments for Pastors Leaving a Congregation

by Lawrence W. Farris

Pastoral transitions can be fraught with pitfalls, yet there is advice that can help ministers and congregations avoid those dangers. Lawrence Farris, a pastor who himself has left three churches, here gives ten wise, thoughtful commandments for shepherds leaving their flock. Hardly heavy-handed dictums, these "commandments" are more gospel than law, laying out helpful strategies in such areas as recognizing when to depart, patching broken relationships, and enabling the next pastor to make a clean start. While many may dream of a comfortable, long-term pastorate, today's congregational realities make the wisdom in this book relevant for pastors in churches big and small, liberal and conservative. Perfect for pastors soon to depart and for those happy to stay put for now, Ten Commandments for Pastors Leaving a Congregation provides welcome guidance to both pastors and parishioners facing this hopeful and challenging transition.

105 pages, Paperback

First published July 15, 2006

Reviews

[Jesse Baker]

In the middle of my grief, this book has warmed my heart! Lawrence Farris gave me the words to articulate my sadness: “Sometimes leaving a pastorate can feel like nothing so much as a death” (p. xi). Apart from helping me name my grief, the author also provided wisdom I had not considered.

Here are five key takeaways:

- I was assured that I had made the right decision to transition from my current role. Lawrence mentioned that a new call can emerge when your “eye falls on an advertisement in a journal where a church is seeking a pastor and the description of the position sounds like it was written precisely for him” (p. 10). The desire to apply for my new role was a clear call to move on.

- I was inspired to explain with transparency the reasons for moving on. In my resignation letter, I noted my call to full-time youth ministry. People were mainly encouraged by my explanation. But others felt abandoned, still expressing their grief with tears in public worship. To offer ‘words of assurance’ (p. 21), I plan to write a personal letter of encouragement to each family, recounting the past, identifying my regrets, and expressing my hopes for their future.

- Lawrence shared that a crucial activity for a faith community is “the act of remembering” (p. 35). He describes this practice as ‘turning our attention to the past as a way of preparing for the future’ (p. 36). To practice faithful remembering, I plan to offer reflections of thanksgiving and gratitude in my weekly bulletin write-up before I depart. I also plan to craft a farewell speech, reflecting on the past years of gospel ministry.

- I was encouraged to begin mending broken relationships where “unresolved conflict or antagonistic feelings” lurk (p. 44). I plan to meet with these individuals one last time, even if there is no resolution. The reality is that due to human brokenness, “some relationships will not be reconciled” (p. 50).

- Lawrence urged me to help my successor have a good start. If a handover is not provided, the successor will likely harm the parish, causing unnecessary pain due to lack of knowledge. For this reason, I wholeheartedly agree with the author: a failure to provide a handover is “inconsiderate” (p. 58). Further, a good handover will reduce the temptation to interfere with the ministry of my predecessor (p. 74).

For these reasons and more, this book is full of practical gems to finish well. I recommend it for pastors leaving or considering the call to move on to a new ministry position or vocation.

[Nigel Fortescue]

Being in the process of transitioning right now meant this book came at the perfect time. The 10 Commandments are a great encouragement and rebuke. I have followed bits and pieces out of each and I’m sure the wonderful people in Campbelltown are getting a better version of a departure than I could have conjured up. Some of the stories are laboured but overall an excellent and easy read... challenging and wonderful.

[Jeffrey]

Easy read. Some good insights. Found chapter 6 to have a lot of good suggestions. The 10 commandments is a bit cheesy of a layout, but 10 chapters was plenty. Taking care of self and family always important.

[Elizabeth]

A few helpful tidbits, but the vast majority of this book is written for pastors in traditions that allow pastors to move on their own volition, not in the appointment rotation... so it wasn't ultimately super-helpful for me. Easy to read, though, and would be super-helpful for pastors in other traditions.

[Susannah]

Good read with good tips!

[Michelle]

Solid practical advice for transitioning