Positively Beautiful by Wendy Mills

Jan 09, 2015 Paula M. of Her Book Thoughts! rated it really liked it

Shelves: arc, for-review, forever-in-my-heart, favorite, all-them-feels

You can also read my review HERE.

This gutted me more than TFIOS did. If you think this will be another cancer story, stop right there. This book truly mirrors its title because Beautiful is the one word I thought when I finished the book. This is Wendy Mills’ debut novel and I just want to hug and thank her for writing this incredible novel.

“Courage is not always big and bright and loud; sometimes it’s as silent and small as true words, a smile when you’d rather weep, or getting up every

...more

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Jun 20, 2015 Kels rated it really liked it

Shelves: ya, romance, tear-jerker, worth-a-reread, realistic-fiction, it-could-happen, emotional-rollercoaster, conflicted, wordsmith-writing-hero, books-that-linger

“Courage is not always big and bright and loud; sometimes it's as silent and small as true words, a smile when you'd rather weep, or getting up every day and living with quiet dignity while all around you life rages. You cannot truly love, live or exist without courage. Without it you are simply biding time until you die.”

What stood out to me when I first picked up Positively Beautiful--besides the too-bright cover--was the writing! Wendy Mills penmanship is breathtaking beautiful. I mean,

“Courage is not always big and bright and loud; sometimes it's as silent and small as true words, a smile when you'd rather weep, or getting up every day and living with quiet dignity while all around you life rages. You cannot truly love, live or exist without courage. Without it you are simply biding time until you die.”

What stood out to me when I first picked up Positively Beautiful--besides the too-bright cover--was the writing! Wendy Mills penmanship is breathtaking beautiful. I mean, wow, she stole my breath away more than once with her words, which were poignant, witty, creative, full of beautiful but not overwhelming metaphors. Seriously guys, I'm having a case of writing envy just thinking about it. Though not entirely similar, it quaintly reminded me of the writing in The Start of Me and You by Emery Lord. So if you're a fan of poetic writing, then this is a plus one on the scoreboard for you!

But there, were negatives. Oh my, were there negatives. One of my main issues was with the the protagonist, Erin. She grated on my nerves so much! First, with the faulty friendship, which was an extremely sucky friendship in my opinion. There was just so much wrong with it, and the majority of the blame lied with Erin. And then with the completely selfish, irresponsible decisions she made later on in the book. Gosh, I seriously was so upset at the turn of events in Part 2 that I had to set the book down. Yes, it upset me that much that I had to take a nap and recoup! :/ But somehow, although she still annoyed me at times, she managed to connect me with her emotions and I was crying so hard by the ending. I need some ice cream just thinking about it.

Another big issue: the romance. I mean, YA romances just have a high suckage rate and Positively Beautiful was sadly no exception. There are two love interests, surprise, surprise, and I didn't connect with either of them. Erin's crush on Michael just felt so superficial, and remained just that. And then Jason... I really liked Jason, but as a love interest, nuh uh. I think that it would have been so much cooler if Wendy Mills would have opted for exploring and developing a friendship between them rather than thrusting them together in a poorly construed romance.

Lastly, this book is pretty hefty for a YA contemporary, and I think it would have been a much more solid read if it would have been condensed some. There was just a lot of fluff and scenes I feel like served no purpose to strengthening the novel. I felt like by the end of Part 2 and all of Part 3 was such a drag, it pretty much bored me to tears. There's a lot of nothing going on between the middle, and this book suffered tremendously because of it.

But, hey, look I still gave it four stars!! Crazy, right? Okay so to clarify, this was more of a high 3 than a low four (darn you GR for not having half stars yet!!), but I decided to round up because this was still a stunning debut novel by Wendy Mills that tackled some tough issues that really made me think, and hellooo, I cried, which is at least worth half a star. Seriously, this book had some flaws but I can't get over how great the writing was, I look forward to reading more of Wendy Mills' novels (which I already have flagged on my to read list). :) ...more

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Oct 29, 2014 Erin Lynn rated it really liked it

Shelves: young-adult, cancer, arc, march-2015

This review was originally posted on The Hardcover Lover.

Thanks to Alexia On The Same Page ARC Tours for providing an ARC for me to read!

A few simple words can't explain what reading Positively Beautiful by Wendy Mills will do to readers. It's an emotional roller coaster of a read that will have readers laughing, smiling, swooning, and crying. You will be in tears by the end of the book. I promise you that. The book will literally transform the way readers think about life and death.

The novel This review was originally posted on The Hardcover Lover.

Thanks to Alexia On The Same Page ARC Tours for providing an ARC for me to read!

A few simple words can't explain what reading Positively Beautiful by Wendy Mills will do to readers. It's an emotional roller coaster of a read that will have readers laughing, smiling, swooning, and crying. You will be in tears by the end of the book. I promise you that. The book will literally transform the way readers think about life and death.

The novel starts out by introducing readers to sixteen (almost seventeen) year old Erin Bailey. She is your average American teenage girl. She does well in school and has a best friend. She's not the most popular girl in school, but I wouldn't say she's on the lowest rung of the social ladder. She's also got a nemesis like quite a few girls do in high school. Her best friend meets a boy, and soon they all begin to hang out with Michael, a boy who used to be quite popular until he decided to drop it all. Pretty status quo, right? Well... that's just the beginning of the book.

Mills introduces the main problem of the book - Erin's mom's cancer diagnosis - rather quickly, but after reading the whole novel, I like that she did that. With the inclusion of a very quick diagnosis, Mills creates a very realistic case of what it's like to battle cancer because cancer really can strike anywhere and at any time.

If you read the synopsis, you know that Erin's mom discovers that the cancer is linked to a genetic mutation. Some of you may already be aware of this gene - the BRCA gene - because Angelina Jolie recently decided to have a mastectomy because of it. After Erin finds out that she could be at risk, she orders a kit to have her own DNA tested. I thought that Erin was brave for wanting to find out the truth, even though everyone, including her mom, is insisting that she wait until she's older to be tested. I admire Mills for bringing this into the story. It really shows that some people want to know just how they could die.

I also enjoyed that there were a few things going on in this book. It's not just about cancer (although the aforementioned cancer is the reason that Erin does a lot of what she does). There are some heartbreaking moments between Erin and her best friend. There are some times when you'll feel so bad for Erin that you want to jump into the book and give her the biggest of hugs. You'll see Erin go online to find support groups to help her cope with the genetic mutation that is destroying her family. Erin also tries to distract herself with flying lessons so she can feel closer to her late father. Erin is a mufti-faceted character that I think will connect with many of today's teens.

If you're only looking to read a few new books in 2015, this should be one of them. It's emotional and it's raw, but it will teach you about life and love when it seems like all hope is lost in the world.
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Mar 06, 2015 Olivia rated it it was amazing

This book was..... Oh my god. This book was... Wow. I mean. Wow. I highly recommend this. Erin was extremely relatable for me, Jason was perfect, and everything about this story was beautiful. P. S. Don't read the end of book in public, or you'll be crying buckets and getting strange looks from strangers, just like what happened to me in school today.

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Nov 27, 2014 Savannah (Books With Bite) rated it it was amazing

This story. So much feels. So much heart that is put into it, that once I was in the story there was no way I was getting out.
Plot: This is about a young girl who is in the midst of a trial. After loosing one parent, Erin much come to terms about losing the other. AHHH! I can’t even begin to say how much I love this book. I read this book at the doctors office and I had to step out due to the amount of tears coming out of my eyes! Each chapter flows well and is filled with such emotion and heart ...more

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Mar 08, 2015 Sophie rated it it was amazing

You can find this review along with many others on my blog!

If you couldn't already tell from the synopsis, this is a cancer book. Personally, I don't have the best history with cancer books. And I mean that in the sense that they tend to really get to me. I've had people who are very dear to me battle this disease and I have lost people to it. So when it comes to books like these, I can be very picky.

This book follows a Erin, a girl who lost her father and lives with her mom. One day after You can find this review along with many others on my blog!

If you couldn't already tell from the synopsis, this is a cancer book. Personally, I don't have the best history with cancer books. And I mean that in the sense that they tend to really get to me. I've had people who are very dear to me battle this disease and I have lost people to it. So when it comes to books like these, I can be very picky.

This book follows a Erin, a girl who lost her father and lives with her mom. One day after her mom gets home from work, she delivers some heart-shattering news to Erin. She tells her that she has been diagnosed with breast cancer. And on top of that, she tells her that she might be prone to having too. Thus the madness and roller-coaster of emotions ensues. We basically get to see how this affects Erin and her whole life. We get to see how this influences her daily life choices and how it really just breaks her inside. Not only that, we also get a very in depth insight of the disease itself and how it can affect the people suffering from it.

I think that the author stayed very truthful to the whole topic. Nothing really seemed understated nor exaggerated. And I really appreciated that because it made the story very believable. So much so that before I knew it, I found myself getting very attached to these characters. Which ultimately lead to a sea of used tissues in my bedroom (gross I know). I think the characters were so well-written and developed. At first the main character seemed a little bit childish at times, but then some of the best character development happened.

This book is divided into parts. And I think that this really played a huge part in the story itself because in each part we get to see different phases of her mom's cancer. And they were significantly far apart. And by that I mean that some time passes from each part to the next. At first I was worried about this because I thought it would make everything feel rushed. However, it was quite the opposite of this. To me this elongated the story in a necessary way. If that makes any sense. I guess what I'm trying to say is that we got to see a lot of things that you don't really get with many books that deal with this subject. And none of it felt like it dragged on. There wasn't a time were I found myself bored. In fact I really couldn't put this book down. Like I said, I got really attached to the characters and the story. I was completely engrossed in this book and I owe a lot of that to the writing, which also played a big part in my enjoyment of the book. It was absolutely eloquent and it delivered humor while remaining poignant.

I also wanted to mention that there are some romance aspects in this book which I adored. I won't discuss that any further cause I don't want to spoil anyone!

Overall, I think everyone should pick this book up. As soon as you start reading it will evoke interest in you and you won't be able to put it down. ...more

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Apr 16, 2016 Rachael rated it it was amazing

Shelves: my-personal-library, contemporary, all-time-favorites, ugly-cries, love-bugs, captivating-covers

This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers. To view it, click here.

She sighs and looks over my shoulder for a moment. Then she looks back at me.
'I have cancer,' she says simply.
And my life cracks into before and after just like that.

I'm one of those people that don't believe in coincidences. This book took me so long to read because it was like looking in the mirror. I didn't get drunk at a party and kiss my best friend's boyfriend, but I found a tumor when I was sixteen and a half. I freaked, of course, and thought if I ignored it, that it would go away. How

She sighs and looks over my shoulder for a moment. Then she looks back at me.
'I have cancer,' she says simply.
And my life cracks into before and after just like that.

I'm one of those people that don't believe in coincidences. This book took me so long to read because it was like looking in the mirror. I didn't get drunk at a party and kiss my best friend's boyfriend, but I found a tumor when I was sixteen and a half. I freaked, of course, and thought if I ignored it, that it would go away. How many sixteen year olds get breast cancer? I didn't want to become one of them. I had actually forgotten about it until I was just over seventeen, and by that point, I realized I needed to say something or it really might turn into cancer. I told my mom, we scheduled an appointment, got it biopsied, and waited for the results. It turned out to be part of a chronic illness/disease (I really hate the word disease. It makes me feel disgusting), and that it was thankfully not cancerous. Flash forward two and a half years, and the tumor had grown and become insanely painful. So painful, that it had gotten to the point I couldn't wear underwire bras anymore.

My specialist referred me to a breast oncologist and she scheduled surgery the following week. I remember sitting in that waiting room, sitting by women fighting this monster. I remember crying because it would be my future. The tumor had grown into a golf ball size, and was highly, highly suspicious for malignancy. Even though it's gone now, there is a very real (like 90%) chance that it will come back, and when it does, it will be cancerous. And with my gene mutation (not BRCA), I am four times more likely to develop breast cancer, and others like me have the highest chance to develop brain cancer compared to the rest of the population that doesn't have this gene mutation.

This book was very, very, very real for me. I recently found a support group for others like me, and I have to weigh the decision of whether or not I too, should get a mastectomy. Does knowing make it better? Or is ignorance truly bliss? Some days you're on one side, and others on the opposite side.

Erin's dad was a pilot, and she learns quickly that she inherited his love for flying. It probably didn't hurt that flying took away some of the unbearable weight on her shoulders. She has a natural talent and feels close to her dad, even though he's been gone for a little over 10 years.

I had to take my time reading this book because it wasn't really fiction for me. Sure, what Erin did was not smart by any means. But, because I understand exactly where she's coming from, I can't really blame her. I can't tell you how many times I wished that I could run away from what I have. When she finds out she's positive for the BRCA gene, she flies solo from her home state, Georgia, to Florida where Ashley lives.

Erin found out that the friend she had "met" in the support group, the friend she thought was a girl, was in fact, a guy. A very attractive guy, from his description. Despite being a little taken aback, she feels as if she has already met him before, and there's no awkwardness because he's still the friend she found in the group. Jason takes her to his island, he makes a fire, sets up a tent, and supplies her with clothes, food and even books. The events that happen over the course of the week they spend together, she falls for him and experiences a different kind of heartbreak: rejection.

This book happens over a near two year period. And unlike any other cancer book I have read this far, the focus is not on love, but on coping and coming to terms with your own reality as well as the one person who is always supposed to be there for you: your mom.

There's triumph, there's heartbreak, there's betrayal and blows to the gut that knock the wind out of you. It's so realistic, and I honestly felt like I was swatted down every other page. This book gives an honest insight on what it's like to discover harsh realities of natural selection at its finest. It sheds some light on the teetering scale of "what ifs" that come hand in hand with a gene mutation such as BRCA.

My gene mutation promotes tumor growth anywhere there are nerves. Yes, that means I can literally get tumors anywhere and everywhere on my body. I have them on my stomach and back, my arms, my neck, one on my face, as well as all down the entire length of my spine. I also have tumors between my skull and scalp, in my brain, and even my irises. I, unlike Erin, can't just cut off my boobs and scrape out my ovaries to avoid the potential cancer. I'd have to literally cut everything off me in order to avoid all the potential cancer I face. There isn't even any treatment for my condition. None. Nothing but sit and wait, and watch as tumors grow and form and have yearly fully body MRIs. But just like Erin, I can pass this horrible mutation onto my children. Me and my husband came to the heartbreaking decision to not have children because of my condition. It's still hard to swallow because I wanted kids of my own so freaking bad.

I cried the entirety of part four.

When Jason told Erin he loved her, I cried some more.

That last freaking chapter, I sobbed like a baby while I read through my blurred vision.

I sat and stared at the wall for twenty minutes after I finished this book.

This book gets cancer. This book understands just how ugly it is. This book's title is so unbelievably perfect for it.

This book is raw, and sad, and beautiful and heartbreaking, and it is so unbelievably real. Everyone should read this book, so they too, can understand what the limbo of not knowing and what cancer truly looks like. And also, that the unknown certainty, sometimes guaranteed "C word" stamp doesn't mean weakness. That the "C word" doesn't mean death and not living life to its fullest.

Courage is not always but and bright and loud; sometimes it's as silent and small as true words, a smile when you'd rather weep, or getting up every day and living with quiet dignity while all around you life rages. You cannot truly love, love, or exist without courage. Without it you are simply biding time until you die.

The days of my life are pearls on a string, some scratched and marred, some lustrous and pure, but all of them mine alone. It's not the ugliest, or the most beauty of them, that defines me, but all of them together that make me who I am.

...more

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Dec 10, 2014 Gabs {My Full Bookshelf Reviews} rated it really liked it

I received a free copy of this book in exchange for an honest review. All quotes included are from an ARC, and will be checked with the finished copy of the story once it is released.

Read more of my reviews at My Full Bookshelf Reviews

Which would you rather, to have a long miserable life, or a short, beautiful one?

This book was a beautiful sob-worthy read and I honestly don't think I've ever highlighted so many quotes in a story for no other reason than the fact that they somehow spoke to me. ...more

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Dec 05, 2014 Tee loves Kyle Jacobson rated it it was amazing

Shelves: around-the-world-arc-tours, november-2014

Positively Beautiful was an incredible read for me. I have to say that I laughed and I cried and then I thought to myself they need to make this into a movie because it would be a best selling movie. I hope this book comes out on Audio Books because I want to listen to it again and again.

Poor Erin she has a life so full of loss and more loss to come. See her father died when she was young and then her grandmother died from Cancer and now her mother is telling her she is dying from Cancer as ...more

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Dec 20, 2017 Laurence R. rated it really liked it · review of another edition

GUYS, I’M SUCH A MESS! I really, really liked this novel, though. It’s even better than I thought it would be. I highly recommend it!

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Mar 02, 2015 Celeste_pewter rated it it was amazing

Ok. So, I'm going to admit something right off the bat: I had mixed feelings going into Positively Beautiful.

I wanted to read Positively Beautiful, because I understand Erin. An endocrine disorder runs in my family, and it's a genetic flaw that has resulted in some family members having to take medicaton for the rest of their lives, while other family members have been lost to us completely. As strange as this may sound, I like reading books like Positively Beautiful, because it's a reminder ...more

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Feb 11, 2015 Cynthia (Bingeing On Books) rated it liked it

Shelves: arcs

This is a tough review for me to write because I did not love this book nearly as much as I thought I would. The book starts right after Erin finds out about her mother's cancer diagnosis. To top it off, her mother tells her about a test for the BRCA gene that would tell Erin if she has the gene for breast and ovarian cancer. There is a lot of emotion in these passages. As Erin says, there is her life before and then there is her life after. I felt so sad for her that she had to be strong for This is a tough review for me to write because I did not love this book nearly as much as I thought I would. The book starts right after Erin finds out about her mother's cancer diagnosis. To top it off, her mother tells her about a test for the BRCA gene that would tell Erin if she has the gene for breast and ovarian cancer. There is a lot of emotion in these passages. As Erin says, there is her life before and then there is her life after. I felt so sad for her that she had to be strong for her mother and take care of her, while dealing with thoughts of DNA testing and normal everyday life at school. People tell Erin that there is nothing she can do. They tell Erin that she shouldn't even take the test until at least eighteen, if not twenty-one and that she shouldn't make any decisions based on this test until at least twenty-five. In the notes at the end of the book, the author mentions the extensive research she did on this testing and this gene. But nowhere in the book or the notes at the end of the book did she mention why these age limits were recommended. I don't know anything about this gene really so that information would have been nice. Nevertheless, I could understand Erin's frustration when everyone told her to just forget about it. She was seventeen so they were telling her not to even think about it for the next year. How does a person even do that? Erin did make some questionable decisions because she wanted to know the answer, but I understand them. Like Erin, I am an obsessive planner so there is no way I could just not know.

Here is what I disliked about the book: the romance, or lack thereof. Forget love triangle. There was almost a love square happening. It was confusing. First Erin had a major crush on a loner at school. Of course she turnover every encounter into way more than it was. But there was no chemistry and no relationship development at all. And then when it "ended" after approximately three "encounters" (I can't even call them dates, I just didn't care. Then she met someone else. This guy was the "real" love interest I guess, while the first guy was just a distraction or something. I hated this romance from the start. There was zero chemistry and somehow these two characters loved each other after a day or two. And this other guy didn't want to fall in love with anyone, even Erin, because he wanted to protect her. Sorry, but gag me with that one. The "relationships" between these two men did nothing to add to the story and I found myself skimming over those sections. I was much more interested in Erin's dilemma and her mom's illness.

Halfway throughout the book, Erin did something incredibly stupid. I won't give any spoilers, but it was just plain stupid. I tried to understand why she chose to do what she did, but I just feel it was a selfish decision on her part. The ending of the book left me in tears (naturally) and once the author stopped harping on the romance, I could concentrate on the heartbreaking decision Erin had to make, along with dealing with her mom's illness. ...more

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Jan 08, 2015 Christina added it

Shelves: fluffs-my-flouncy-skirt, netgalley, arc-galley, own-on-nook-kindle, contemporary, stand-alone-books, ball-o-angst, 2015-publication

DNF at 28%

**SPECIAL NOTE:** An eARC of this title was provided by the publisher via NetGalley in exchange for an honest review. However, that did not influence this review in any way. All thoughts, quotes, and opinions will be of this version and not of the published edition.

I was always drawn to the book because the cover really is pretty, but the synopsis always had me on the fence. After watching GR for a bit and noticing a heaping of 5-star reviews that boasted about how emotionally DNF at 28%

**SPECIAL NOTE:** An eARC of this title was provided by the publisher via NetGalley in exchange for an honest review. However, that did not influence this review in any way. All thoughts, quotes, and opinions will be of this version and not of the published edition.

I was always drawn to the book because the cover really is pretty, but the synopsis always had me on the fence. After watching GR for a bit and noticing a heaping of 5-star reviews that boasted about how emotionally impacting-- we all know I love having my feels go through the grinder-- this novel was, I quickly hit the request button and anxiously waited for approval.

So, immediately after starting the book I recognized that this sixteen-going-on-seventeen-year-old and her best friend sounded a tad on the juvenile side, and I know this is young adult, but when it sounds more middle school than high school, you can't fault me for wrinkling my nose a little bit. I tried to stick with it, hoping that the author's voice would grow on me, but it hasn't. I was also feeling like things weren't flowing well- character personalities, romantic interests, and dialogue all fell a little on the forced side. I have a long list of books that I'm trying to work through and after reading a few of the lower rated reviews for this novel, I can see that I'd probably fall in that camp for various reasons. Though I doubt this would be a 1-star review if I had chosen to see it through to the end, I don't want to have to struggle to find enjoyment while reading a book.

However, I don't want to deter you from reading. It really does have many good reviews, I just don't think this is a "me" book and should have trusted my initial hesitation more. That being said, I don't rate books I don't finish because I don't think it's fair to the author, the book, or the publisher, so that's why you don't find a rating here.

♥ A very special thanks to HarperTEEN and Edelweiss for providing me with an advanced copy of this title in exchange for my honest review. ...more

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Sep 16, 2015 Melissa rated it it was amazing

Shelves: wow-books

So I finished this book and it was awesome! It's all about love, death and choices in life. Erin has had such a hard time in this book, especially with the people who love her.
I would definitely recommend this book to anyone that likes sad romantic books! ;)

SPOILERS UP AHEAD THIS ROAD!
So I was finishing the book at school during class and when Erin's mom died I almost cried. My friend sitting next to me was looking at me and saw the tears in my eyes.
I was really disappointed and sad when ...more

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Jun 10, 2015 Jessica Shelley rated it really liked it

Shelves: 2016

Wow! What a breathtaking novel. I did not expect to love this book as much as i did but man did it shock me. Wendy Mills sheds a tough light on Cancer and BRACA (genetic cancer) through the protagonist of a teenage girl and her mother. Every sentence was crafted beautifully. The characters were realistic and easy to get attached to. The story was so sad but ultimately uplifting and everything about this book will have a special place in my heart now.

If you want a novel, that will help you to ...more

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Jan 06, 2015 Brandi Kosiner (Brandi Breathes Books) rated it liked it

2.75
This was on my radar because I adore Lurlene McDaniel and like some of Picoult's books and the comparison drew me in,

Karen at For What It's Worth and Mary at The Book Swarm occasionally post twitter-style reviews. Karen calls hers Short and Tweet, and I am going to borrow that review style here.

Tweet (longer) Review:

It took me a bit to get into this one. The first part seemed to b be focused on her best friend and her big personality but I wanted to connect with Erin though. To know what ...more

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Jan 12, 2015 Ashley rated it liked it

I'm thinking 3.5 stars.

It was good, then iffy, then good again. In the middle the MC got a little annoying. She did some stupid things that annoyed me, and eventually I understood why she did them.. but it was still kind of annoying, hah.

But the book was otherwise really good and towards the end I was CRYING.

The love interest/romance was confusing for a while though O_O More on that later.. :P

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Mar 22, 2015 Jessie rated it it was amazing

Shelves: netgalley

This was an amazing book. Coming from a family of breast cancer survivors it really made me think about my own situation and would I want to get tested. There is so many different emotions and situations in this book that I think a lot of teenagers can relate to. Be prepared to laugh, cry and possibly yell while reading this book!

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Sep 01, 2015 Aubrey added it

I loved this book! For me the book is very relate able and even though it was fiction I still felt like it was as real as it gets

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Mar 12, 2015 Danny rated it really liked it

Oh how much I cried!!!!!! Beautiful ending

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Aug 10, 2019 Bethany rated it did not like it

This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers. To view it, click here. Here I am again, writing a review about a book that I completed loathed.

Positively Beautiful had so much potential. At first glance, the book appeared to be a story filled with the telling of a tragedy concerning a teenager having to deal with her mother’s cancer and, potentially, her own. Instead, it was a boring novel that seemed to be written by a middle schooler.

There are a lot of reasons why I hated this book, but the top five are 1. the story was so choppy 2. the main character was ...more

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Aug 21, 2018 Mina rated it really liked it · review of another edition

"Yes, the stories all end the same way. Every one of them, but some sooner than the others, like a good book where someone has torn out the last pages."

"I need to show Mom I can do it, though even on my eighteenth birthday I feel younger and less secure than ever before. Will it always be like this, feeling less equipped to deal with life each year that passes? Is this what being an adult feels like, realizing the choices don't get any easier, just more important?"

"Mama, I'm saying goodbye now. ...more

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May 19, 2017 Jessicalyn rated it really liked it

This book is about a girl named Erin who goes to high school and she's in the junior year, one day when when her mom came home from work her mom looked so tired and sad that she didn't even want to cook dinner but when Erin asked her what's wrong her mom told her that she had breast cancer and Erin was sad because it's always been mom and Erin she did had a dad but he died from a motorcycle accident so if she loses her mom her life would change, also Erin noticed that she could get cancer to ...more

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Jun 07, 2016 Patsy rated it it was ok

Shelves: review-long

Date Read: June 2016
This is my 1st time reading it.
Rating: 1.5 stars.
Review:

Oh boy.

I rounded this book up to two stars because it did have some things I really liked. The cancer elements of this story felt very real and scary, which made them impactful. A couple of the messages the authour was trying to get across actually really resonated with me. The book was paced well and was fairly entertaining, otherwise I would have put it down. At its core I thought this book was a pretty
Date Read: June 2016
This is my 1st time reading it.
Rating: 1.5 stars.
Review:

Oh boy.

I rounded this book up to two stars because it did have some things I really liked. The cancer elements of this story felt very real and scary, which made them impactful. A couple of the messages the authour was trying to get across actually really resonated with me. The book was paced well and was fairly entertaining, otherwise I would have put it down. At its core I thought this book was a pretty mediocre, kind of sad, easy to read young adult contemporary. Unfortunately there were a lot of things that made me really mad while reading this as well...

I'm gonna just put this out there right now - I got queerbaited by the summary of this book. It sucks that this is still happening. I'm not going to go on a super long rant about this, but I really feel like my anger is justified and it made this book a lot less enjoyable. (view spoiler) It just really sucked that this happened, and besides making me feel like shit for being tricked into thinking I'm getting real representation (again), I truly believe it negatively impacted the plot. While we're on the subject, I also noticed that there was a huge emphasis on the idea that 'being a real woman = boobs' and that definitely seemed transphobic. I doubt everyone will agree with me, but this book was ridiculously ignorant of LGBT people and it made me really mad.

Alright so besides that, I just found the characters to be a huge pain in the ass. Erin was likable sometimes but every time I started to like her she would do something really stupid with some fake deep explanation that made no sense. I fully understand that she was going through a hard time but there were some things she did that were like ????????? All the other teenage characters were the stereotypical "i'm a middle aged person and i remember high school like it was yesterday!!!" kind of teens that are super edgy and appallingly unrealistic. Some of the side characters were kind of nice, but none of them or their relationships really made me do anything other than groan occasionally. The strongest emotion I felt for one of the characters while reading was embarrassment.

I know I was already disappointed since I was expecting lesbians and instead received boring straight people, but these boring straight people were even more boring and straight than the usual boring straight people I've come to expect from YA. The love triangle was really extra and all the Erin/Michael/Faith drama made literally no sense, all of their interactions came entirely out of nowhere. Jason was weird and creepy and all the 'advice' he gave Erin was completely unhelpful but she worshiped him anyway? It was bad. I haven't read a romance this bad in a while.

I also found some plot points to be so unrealistic that it was genuinely laughable. I know it's contemporary fiction, but I think everyone who has read this knows that I'm talking about the entire island part. It was ridiculous and made the entire book, even the parts with real problems and emotions, seem fake.

I don't know. It was alright I guess. I was expecting to feel a range of emotions, but I was expecting more of a giggly-devastated range instead of an embarrassed-annoyed range. Also I was expecting lesbians. Oh well. ...more

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Mar 16, 2015 Estelle rated it liked it

Shelves: young-adult, tissue-box, 2015-new-releases, bloomsbury, friendship

3.5 stars.

Last Friday, Angelina Jolie wrote an op-ed for the New York Times, sharing her decision to remove her ovaries and fallopian tubes. As the carrier of the BRCA1 gene mutation, Jolie believed going through with this procedure (and, therefore, speeding along menopause) was the right decision for her — especially knowing that her grandmother, aunt, and mom all died of cancer very young. In her piece, Jolie urges women to know all of their options and emphasizes that everyone needs to choose 3.5 stars.

Last Friday, Angelina Jolie wrote an op-ed for the New York Times, sharing her decision to remove her ovaries and fallopian tubes. As the carrier of the BRCA1 gene mutation, Jolie believed going through with this procedure (and, therefore, speeding along menopause) was the right decision for her — especially knowing that her grandmother, aunt, and mom all died of cancer very young. In her piece, Jolie urges women to know all of their options and emphasizes that everyone needs to choose their own path, but also makes sure we know: “Knowledge in power.”

This leads me to Erin in Positively Beautiful. Not only is she going through the motions of being a normal teenager (a mysterious boy from her class, a great best friend who starts ignoring her for a new boy, missing her dad, learning a new skill), she finds out that her mother has breast cancer and she could be a carrier of the gene mutation. Does she take the test and find out? Or does she forget about it? As you can imagine, it’s difficult to just ignore something this huge, this life altering, and Erin finds herself depending on online support from others in the same boat — most specifically, Ashley, a girl in Florida who is always trying to convince Erin to smell the roses and experience all the beauty there is in the world — especially when life seems so hopeless.

Wendy Mills has crafted a unique story here. I loved that Erin decided to take flying lessons. The late night, abandoned building adventures she took with her best friend and boys from school. Even the growing pains that Erin experienced with Trina, her lifelong best friend, when she landed a guy who finally appreciated her. To be in this position, with her mom sick and a mysterious cloud possibly hanging over her head, Erin is caught between the life of a typical teenager and a girl forced to grow up way too fast, forced to make decisions that could affect her entire life.

Shocker: we don’t always know what to do when life gets this out of hand. I won’t say Erin gets a get out of jail free card but she certainly takes an unexpected detour Survivor-style — granting her a respite — for a little bit anyway. She might be overwhelmed but she’s not silly enough to think she can escape her problems forever. Instead, supports shift and she returns to real life recharged and as ready as she will ever be to face the unknown.

While I personally may have turned down the drama in the high school aspect of this book, I thought it was great how Positively Beautiful shed light on a subject we don’t see much in young adult literature — without being preachy. It’s a book that definitely marches to its own drummer, and that’s exactly why I couldn’t read fast enough and sat in one spot until I reached the end. (Warning: tissues are not an option.)

Review originally posted on: Rather Be Reading Blog. ...more

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Jan 05, 2015 Anna rated it it was amazing

Why is it so much harder to write a review for a book you loved, than for one you hated? All I know is that this one particularly resonated with me. Erin is someone who just coasts through life, not wanting to take any risks. Her Dad was a stunt pilot and died in a plane crash when she was little. Ever since then, Erin has taken a page out of her overly cautious Mom's book, reveling in the status quo. She thinks life is enough with her unacted-upon crush on Michael, her close friendship with the Why is it so much harder to write a review for a book you loved, than for one you hated? All I know is that this one particularly resonated with me. Erin is someone who just coasts through life, not wanting to take any risks. Her Dad was a stunt pilot and died in a plane crash when she was little. Ever since then, Erin has taken a page out of her overly cautious Mom's book, reveling in the status quo. She thinks life is enough with her unacted-upon crush on Michael, her close friendship with the loud/unique Trina, and the good relationship with her Mom. Then Erin finds out that her Mom has breast cancer and that because of a gene mutation, she might eventually get it (or some other cancer) as well. On top of this, after a couple quasi-dates with Michael (courtesy of Trina), mean girl Faith has started bullying her and turning the entire junior class against her. The only thing keeping her going is her flying lessons and the online communication with her gene-positive friend Ashley. When Erin finds out from an online genetic test that she's postive for the mutation, it's the last straw. Erin goes on an unsanctioned journey to meet Ashley and get away from the harsh realities of her own life. But will Erin find what she's looking for? And will it be in the way that she wanted?

Let me just get this out of the way: Erin is kind of a selfish brat for most of this book. Yes, she has a lot to deal with and maybe I'm just too far into the adult perspective to understand a teenager's angst sympathetically anymore. But the way she just disregards the individual situations of Chad, Trina, her Mom, and even Ashley, kind of got on my nerves. Plus, the whole 'romance' with Michael was so childish and viewed through rose-colored glasses (at first, anyhow), that I couldn't help but roll my eyes. He was such a douchebag, pretending that he was so deep when really he was just afraid to keep living. And that's what this whole book comes down to, really. How do you go on living when you don't know for sure how long you have left, or if a horrible disease will take you down? Erin's relationship with Ashley (which was something unexpected), her closeness with her Mom, the possibility of a new romance, and the flying lessons are all things that have the power to take her away from her self-pity. Is it better to know if you have the mutation, or to live without knowing? I won't say anything more to avoid spoiling the book, but I was on the verge of bawling at the end and I can't remember the last book that made me cry! Overall, a beautiful and thought-provoking read that I'd recommend to adults and teens alike.

VERDICT: 4.5/5 Stars

**I reviewed this book as part of Around the World ARC Tours, run by the lovely Princess Bookie. No money or favors were exchanged for this review. This book's expected publication date is March 3rd, 2015.** ...more

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Feb 04, 2015 Erin Clemence rated it really liked it

Shelves: first-reads

I received this novel as a giveaway through Goodreads.
“Positively Beautiful” by Wendy Mills is a novel unlike anything I’ve ever read. It’s refreshing and honest and of course, it plays with the emotions.
The protagonist is a girl named Erin, whose mother has been diagnosed with breast cancer, when Erin is seventeen. Then Erin finds out that the breast cancer stemmed from a hereditary gene, and when Erin is tested for the gene and the results are positive, she decides to “escape” to a small I received this novel as a giveaway through Goodreads.
“Positively Beautiful” by Wendy Mills is a novel unlike anything I’ve ever read. It’s refreshing and honest and of course, it plays with the emotions.
The protagonist is a girl named Erin, whose mother has been diagnosed with breast cancer, when Erin is seventeen. Then Erin finds out that the breast cancer stemmed from a hereditary gene, and when Erin is tested for the gene and the results are positive, she decides to “escape” to a small island in Florida, with a friend who helps her come to terms with all that she must face in her future. The novel obviously has a lot of parallels to my life, which made it very personal for me, in a way that not many novels can. The novel discusses poignant topics, such as the BRCA cancer gene, genetic counseling, and the struggles of chemotherapy and other cancer treatments. It is written like a young adult novel, however it will also secretly teach you something.
I found Erin to be a resilient, convincing character. She is given a tough hand when her mother is diagnosed with cancer, then must face the usual pressures of high school bullying and academics. When she takes flying lessons and begins to experiment with them, a reader can understand Erin’s need to want to disappear among the clouds and escape the pressures on land. However, as an adult, I was not overly impressed with her choice to spend days on an island away from anyone she loves. I was encouraging her to take responsibility, to spend time with her mother, to deal with her life instead of ducking responsibility and hiding from her life. However this is what teenagers do, perhaps I am older than I think! I found the chapters when Erin was on the island to be a bit dry and was curious as to what was happening at home with her mom and with her flying instructor Stewart. I did enjoy the characters of Chaz and Trina however, and was definitely glad when Erin ended up with Jason instead of the morose Michael. The book was easy to read, the writing was poignant and poetic and the storyline was realistic. It definitely did not have a fairy tale ending and I’m glad for that- it made the experience of reading this novel heartfelt and genuine. I recommend this novel to anyone, especially teenagers, and in particular those who are struggling with this situation. You will come away learning a lot, and you may shed a few tears, but I think you will be a braver person when the last page is read.
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Jan 06, 2015 Meghann (Becoming Books) rated it really liked it

Shelves: 2015-releases, coyer-winter2015, arc-tour

Hott Mess Erin
Oh my dear Erin with the odd nickname Rinnie. Erin is a young woman who's father passed away and has recently found out her mother has breast cancer. She's an only child so mom and her are best friends, basically. This is probably one of my favorite bits. Their connection is genuine and strong. However, Erin struggles with the news that she may be a BRACA gene carrier and everything else in her life (there's A LOT going on), so she takes up airplane lessons as a distraction and ...more

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Mar 12, 2016 Becky Keir Grace rated it really liked it

Shelves: edgy-teen-novels, realistic, books-that-stay-with-me-long-after, cancer

This book came highly recommended to me, and I finally picked it up, and then could not put it down. Erin has a relatively normal life. She has the typical teenage life, a best friend, a boy she likes and of course that nasty girl that seems to hate her for no reason. She has a talent for writing. Her father died a long time ago leaving her with her mother who has her own secrets. Erin learns that her mother is a cancer survivor and now the cancer is back. The cancer is linked to a rare genetic This book came highly recommended to me, and I finally picked it up, and then could not put it down. Erin has a relatively normal life. She has the typical teenage life, a best friend, a boy she likes and of course that nasty girl that seems to hate her for no reason. She has a talent for writing. Her father died a long time ago leaving her with her mother who has her own secrets. Erin learns that her mother is a cancer survivor and now the cancer is back. The cancer is linked to a rare genetic mutation. If that not bad enough, there is a chance that Erin may have this gene as well. She must decide whether to be tested for the mutation or not, and if it is positive, how to proceed. Many women with the gene have had a double mastectomy and others even had the ovaries removed. Erin tries to process all of this while dealing with high school and all it has to offer.

At school, Erin is best friends with Trina, an interesting girl that dances to her own drumbeat. Trina begins to date Chaz, and Erin finds herself drifting apart. She has an interest in Michael, the once popular, now loner boy at school. He once dated Faith, Queen Bee, and she is out to make life miserable for Erin. She begins to chat with a girl who is positive for the gene mutation and finds a connection with Ashley.

This book is really a 4.5 rating. Erin's pain and struggles were so much to deal with. She was a very likable character and I admired her strength. She takes flying lessons to help her manage her emotions, although that proves to be a bit much for her as well! I did not care for Trina that much. I felt she was hiding behind her outfits and that she was a little fake. But really she was not that bad, I just found her to be annoying. Faith was the perfect snob of the book; I hated her! She really had nothing better to do with her life than torment Erin. Even when you learn that Faith has her own battles, I still felt nothing for her. Jason was a fun addition and a great twist. I did not see that coming at all. I loved his character and felt he was exactly what Erin needed in her life!

This book is an emotional roller coaster. Yes, I cried buckets of tears through the last few chapters, so try to read this in the privacy of your own home. Well done.
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Jun 02, 2014 Princess Bookie rated it really liked it

Shelves: read2014

My Thoughts: This was a very emotional roller coaster!

We are introduced to Erin who is just your normal average teenager. She’s a bit on the shy quiet type. She has a best friend named Trina. Trina is the loud one. She has her own sense of style. Erin’s dad passed away when she was young so its always just been her and her mother. Well, Erin’s mom gets diagnosed with breast cancer. This creates a whirlwind of emotion for both Erin and her mother. And of course, everyone surrounding them.

Its a ...more

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