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Bleed Like Me

Christa Desir

3.60 · Rating details · 2,635 ratings · 435 reviews

From the author of Fault Line comes an edgy and heartbreaking novel about two self-destructive teens in a Sid and Nancy-like romance full of passion, chaos, and dyed hair.

Seventeen-year-old Amelia Gannon (just "Gannon" to her friends) is invisible to almost everyone in her life. To her parents, to her teachers-even her best friend, who is more interested in bumming cigaret ...more

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Kindle Edition, 288 pages

Published October 7th 2014 by Simon Pulse

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Blue Lily, Lily Blue by Maggie Stiefvater

October 2014 MG & YA Releases

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May 21, 2014 Amanda rated it it was amazing

You can also read my review here:https://devouringbooks2017.wordpress....

WARNING before reading this book you need to buy a box of tissues, cause you are going to cry, and you are going to cry a lot.

This is a book that gets down to the grit of a very serious issue, self-harm. It is a story that will rip you apart from the inside out.

Gannon has been invisible for the past five years. Her parents adopted three brothers from Guatemala and ever since then, she has fallen into the background. She ...more

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Sep 15, 2013 Steph Sinclair rated it really liked it · review of another edition

Shelves: 2014-release, tough-issues, addictive-read, all-the-wrong-choices, ebook, edelweiss, i-totally-saw-that-coming, realistic-fiction, simon-schuster, young-adult

WOW. It’s no secret how strongly I loved Fault Line, so when I saw Bleed Like Me go up on Edelweiss, I knew I had to read it. I was not disappointed.

The other day I found myself in a conversation with a few people who thought YA was mostly made up of love triangles, teen angst and paranormal creatures that run around with their shirt off. To be fair, there are a good amount of these kinds of books in YA just as there are in Adult Urban Fantasy or PNR, and there is nothing wrong with these novel WOW. It’s no secret how strongly I loved Fault Line, so when I saw Bleed Like Me go up on Edelweiss, I knew I had to read it. I was not disappointed.

The other day I found myself in a conversation with a few people who thought YA was mostly made up of love triangles, teen angst and paranormal creatures that run around with their shirt off. To be fair, there are a good amount of these kinds of books in YA just as there are in Adult Urban Fantasy or PNR, and there is nothing wrong with these novels.

My issue always stems from the fact that some make blanket statements about YA when they don't even read YA. YA has too much romance. YA is full of girls and their inability to choose which Totally Hot Guy they want to spend the rest of their life with. YA has too much sex; we must protect the children! YA is too dark. Most of these I brush off as ignorance, but the last one usually gives me pause. It's rather ironic that some would want to limit stories that portray harsher lives of teens. It's almost as if they worry it'll rub off on kids, and it's an absurd notion.

Bleed Like Me would fall under the "Dark YA" umbrella -- though, I prefer to refer to it as an Issue Book since "dark" is subjective -- and like Fault Line , I would be hesitant to recommend it to a younger teen (read: under 13 years of age) unless they are reading it with their parent or guardian. It does contain a few mature themes: drugs, cutting, suicide, etc., however, nothing is glamorized and it would be a great book to open discussion.

This novel shows what happens when two teens so deeply tangled in a bad romance, go from bad to worse. It's just as grim, heartbreaking, horrifying and tragic as Desir’s debut. Like Fault Line, nothing is spared and the characters go through situations no one should have to deal with. Twilight has the stigma of being the punchline to YA for Bella and Edward’s co-dependent relationship being glamorized, but in Bleed Like Me, no such fairytale exists. Gannon and Brooks are in an unhealthy relationship, addicted to each other and unable to see how toxic it is.

It’s a quick read, but not always easy due to the subject manner. But I will say it was hard to put down and I spent 2 hours sitting in my grocery store parking lot binge reading because I just had to see how it ended. Nothing good happens in this book, so if you are looking for something light, this won't "Git R Done" for you. Still, it's an important read and I hope more people consider picking it up and giving it a chance. Add this to your list, people. It’s a winner.

More reviews and other fantastical things at Cuddlebuggery. ...more

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May 25, 2014 Marga rated it did not like it

Shelves: arcs, edelweiss, what-in-the-world, ebooks, oh-please-shut-up, 2014-releases, self-harm, oh-boy-you-disappoint-me, absolutely-disappointing, young-adult

After a series of really good books, I thought that the good luck will stay forever. That I will read only good books from now on. Lol. Who am I kidding? I am actually looking forward to this one and sadly, this book is a huge disappointment.

What the freaking heck?!? I expect something moving, something that would bring to me tears. I am in a mood for a good cry. But this freaking book is just so frustrating. This book made me angry not sad!

The plot:

Amelia Gannon is an only child. She was happy ...more

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Jan 06, 2014 Alexa marked it as to-read

Shelves: contemporary

Ganon...

Where have I heard that before...

....

...more

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Nov 12, 2013 Jolene Perry rated it it was amazing

Shelves: cover-love, re-readable

HOLY FREAKING UNBELIEVABLE.

This is one of those books that HOOKED me in the very first few pages, and I loved it and wanted to scream and just... This is such a fantastic, disturbing read.
I fell in love with these characters, HUGE flaws and all.

FAB.

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May 20, 2014 Jenn (One of Many, We are Legion) rated it really liked it · review of another edition

Shelves: reviewed, emotional, psychologically-wrought-characters, 2014, realistic-fiction-or-contemporary, young-adult-and-new-adult, edelweiss, future-pubs-or-sequels-to-read, reviews-to-transfer, wrecked-my-soul

Thank you to Simon Pulse via Edelweiss for providing me with an advanced review copy of this book!

This book is a doozy and I feel certain that it will divide reviewers on its release. I don’t foresee a ton of middle ground with this one - it’s going to be polarizing.

Before I get to the meat of my thoughts, I’d like to address some of the criticisms. If you look through the few negative reviews posted as of this writing (7.29.14), you’ll notice common complaints: no one learns anything, it lacks ...more

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Nov 02, 2014 Andrew rated it did not like it

Shelves: never-finished

DNF at page 90. I knew something was gonna be bad when I saw a comment on the page for this book that made my stomach churn. Not one character in this book is believable. While Gannon and Brooks' relationship wasn't a good one, it was still unrealistic even in dysfunctional terms. Even her brothers' actions are too unrealistic, especially as adopted children. That's enough. This is awful. I can't even tell if it's just awful, unexplained time jumping that makes this book so bad. Don't waste your ...more

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Aug 01, 2014 Heather *champagne & sweatpants but in a goth way* rated it it was ok · review of another edition

Shelves: 2015, boring, why-did-i-read-that, ya, stupid-heroine, realistic

I don't always rate books I DNF, but I do when I feel like I've got a handle on how the rest of the story will go. That's the case here. I stopped at page 126, bored with the MC. The stuff with her brothers was so over the top it was unbelievable. I flipped through the rest, and then read the epilogue. I don't think I missed anything. ...more

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Feb 10, 2014 Bekka rated it did not like it

I want to be up front about exactly how dark and fucked up this book is. There are very graphic, detailed scenes depicting self harm. There is sex, drugs, running away, an abusive relationship, and even the violent death of a kitten (nothing is shown, but we’re told about it after the fact.) I want to be clear that my low rating is not because of the content, but because of the execution. I have lived through so many of the things that happened on the pages of Bleed Like Me and for the most part I want to be up front about exactly how dark and fucked up this book is. There are very graphic, detailed scenes depicting self harm. There is sex, drugs, running away, an abusive relationship, and even the violent death of a kitten (nothing is shown, but we’re told about it after the fact.) I want to be clear that my low rating is not because of the content, but because of the execution. I have lived through so many of the things that happened on the pages of Bleed Like Me and for the most part, I felt that this book really dropped the ball in representing this well.

When I was a teenager, I self harmed, from the ages of 13 to 18. I’ve lived through abuse of many kinds, including a string of horrifyingly awful boyfriends. At the tender age of 19 I had to accept that I was self medicating and had become addicted to drugs, and I had to fight that addiction (and that fight continues every single day. It doesn’t just go away.) Now, the purpose of this review isn’t to talk about me and what I’ve lived through, but I think it’s important to give some context to my feelings about Bleed Like Me and why I thought it was awful.

I could relate to Gannon in too many ways; it was almost like looking at a mirror. Ever since her parents adopted her three younger brothers five years ago, Gannon has felt invisible. And while my younger siblings are not adopted and certainly did not have the same background as Gannon’s brothers, I could still feel the sharp sting of being replaced. I was ten when my sister was born, but that wasn’t as hard for me, since I didn’t live with my mom. But when my dad and stepmom had a son, when I was 12, it affected me. There were other things going on at the same time too, so I could absolutely connect with Gannon’s feelings of losing control, losing the love of your parents, and feeling like you don’t matter at all. Of course, Gannon’s brothers, being adopted at an older age and having lived on the streets beforehand, they have an entirely different situation. I tried to have some compassion for the three brothers, but they were absolute terrors and gleefully killed a kitten, so it was hard.

When Gannon meets Brooks, it’s easy to see that this isn’t going to be a positive, healing relationship. He’s huffing spray paint out of a paper bag and doesn’t take no for an answer. Shortly after their first introduction, Brooks asserts himself into Gannon’s life and slowly takes over. It doesn’t take long for Gannon to abandon the few good things in her life: her best friend, and her job. Soon, life is all about Brooks whether that means making drug runs, popping E, or even letting him be the one wielding the razor. That’s right – HE cuts HER. This relationship is obviously unstable and unhealthy. I don’t think the author was trying to get one over on us or try to convince the reader that any of this was romantic. It wasn’t. But you know what? I understood how Gannon could get to that point with Brooks. I understood her need to self harm, to self medicate, and to throw all of herself into the tumultuous relationship. I did these same things, but I had different motivations, and that’s where I lost my understanding of Gannon. When I hurt myself, I did it to bring myself back to reality. And when I did unbelievably stupid shit, it wasn’t to impress anyone – it was because I did not care what happened to me. The thing is, I think there was room for that sort of exploration of depression and self harm within this book, but the author, like I said, dropped the ball.

The worst thing about all this is that I think the book lacks focus. Halfway through reading I was sure Gannon was going to learn something. I was sure she was going to get help and actually try to get her shit together. Even if she didn’t succeed at any type of recover (which is SO realistic let’s not even play) at least then it would have been obvious what the book was trying to say. But even after (view spoiler) I don’t think Gannon really learned anything. She didn’t change at all from beginning to end. Even in the epilogue, she still wasn’t over Brooks, still didn’t understand that any of the shit she did was wrong and unhealthy. I understand what an intense and abusive romantic relationship can do to you. I know that having an abusive partner can rob you of any sense of worth or sense of self. But when a character in a book does not change at all, I feel the author has failed.

One last thing – I want to talk about technical errors and why this book made me rage even in the beginning when I still liked it. The writing was atrocious. The metaphors were ridiculous. And I thought it was a mistake to have such clearly graphic imagery for one violent thing, but not others. Also: the smoking. Holy fucking shit. It was like the author has never spent any amount of time near a smoker in her life. I have smoked for ten years (recently quit! yay!) and before that, I grew up in a family of smokers. Literally NO ONE in the history of time has ever called menthol cigarettes “filtered menthols” or anything other than fucking cigarettes. No one has ever said anything like “God, I could use a filtered menthol right about now.” No one says, “He picked me up a package of filtered menthols.” I mean, I know it sounds incredibly stupid, but SO MUCH of this book was dedicated to those goddamn filtered menthols and how obsessed the characters were with smoking cigarettes. Never in my life have I see ANYONE so preoccupied by cigarettes, and I’ve worked retail.

In short, Bleed Like Me was simply a huge disappointment. At first, I really connected with the main character’s story and her struggle with the addiction of self harm, her feelings of helplessness, and even/especially her descent into an abusive relationship. But with a lack of focus and voice, coupled with horrible writing, there’s no way I could ever give this thing higher than this 1.5 rating. Trigger warnings for those who have depression, drug addiction issues, abuse issues, and those who are triggered by fire and burns. ...more

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May 08, 2016 Alice Rachel rated it it was amazing

Wow! Okay, so I could hardly put this book down, which in and of itself owes this book 5 stars!

This book was nicely written in the sense that the writing style and sentences made the characters' actions feel like constant slaps in the face. The gritty style was perfect!

At first, I hated Brooks. But then I just felt so bad for him. I wanted to hug him all the while knowing that no one could ever help him. He would have to save himself.

The possessive, toxic relationship is described realistically ...more

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Apr 06, 2016 Ross Wetzel rated it did not like it

I am going to preface this by saying this book was in all likelihood not meant for my demographic. This was written for a very specific audience and that audience was not me.

If you love overly dramatic afterschool specials then this is the book for you. It tells the tale of the angstiest teenage girl in all the Midwest, Amelia Gannon, and some paint huffer she meets in a park and falls in love with. That is exactly how these two love birds meet and kick off this adventure of misery, sexual haras I am going to preface this by saying this book was in all likelihood not meant for my demographic. This was written for a very specific audience and that audience was not me.

If you love overly dramatic afterschool specials then this is the book for you. It tells the tale of the angstiest teenage girl in all the Midwest, Amelia Gannon, and some paint huffer she meets in a park and falls in love with. That is exactly how these two love birds meet and kick off this adventure of misery, sexual harassment, drug dealing, and ultimately suicide.

Amelia has a shit home life as evidenced by her three adopted brothers from Guatemala. Guatemala being a code word for hell because that's where these little shits came from. Amelia's parents were evidently told they would never have children but that turned out to be bullshit because they have Amelia. Then twelve years later they decide seemingly without any fore thought "you know what this perfectly fine family needs"? Three little assholes from Guatemala. And boy are these kids assholes I spent the majority of the book hoping they would die or get deported. Sadly no they stay and the book is worse for it. They alone are the source of Amelia's angst as her parents are now too focused on dealing with the three terrorists at home. Amelia's parents also now hate eachother just to add another layer of fuck you to the protagonist.

Now back to the paint huffer she meets in the park who aggressively stalks her for a while until she figures out that she loves him unconditionally. Once that happens they make the big move to some shit hole because everyone where she was living was saying maybe this isn't a good idea. Fuck those guys they don't know a good thing when they see it. How could uprooting your entire life, shitty as it is, for some guy you met in a park at dusk huffing paint go wrong? Extraordinarily wrong. Without any prospects or even a mild education they move to the city and share an apartment with two piles of failure. She works in a pizza shop getting paid under the table and Mr. Paint Huffington did some legitimate work for about 5 minutes then decided dealing drugs is where the money is at. Amelia is now sad at how shit her life turned out and tries reaching out to people. Paint Huffington doesn't like that and goes off a little crazier than usual deciding that Amelia is ungrateful and he should cut himself while holding her down to show how devoted he really is. The obvious happens and Mr. Paint Huffington doesn't see the fruits of his labor.

With her abusive tormentor (read lover) now dead Amelia returns home and wallows in self pity. She turns down a date with a decent guy and praises herself on moving on with her life. The end.

As much as I hated the story it is written extremely well and is engaging. The author does a good job of making you want to finish this collection of horrible life decisions. The characters however are just downright unrelatable. Unless you have a drug addict relative then you may relate to the supporting charcters who try to get her to see reason and not fall madly in love with a deranged paint huffing lunatic. ...more

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Apr 26, 2014 Adrienne rated it did not like it

Shelves: ya-contemporary-romance, ebooks, arc, stand-alone

When I saw that I'd gotten approved for this on Edelweiss I was like:

egzoited

Really.

If I had a happy-o-meter with me, I'm sure it would've spontaneously combusted from all the high waves of exuberance I was sending off. It was like a dream come true. I almost peed myself.

Good thing I didn't, though. Not only would it have been extremely embarrassing, but it also wouldn't have been worth it because this book... it didn't exactly turn out to be the all-time shit.

I mean, shit! WHAT the ever-loving crap was ...more

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Oct 09, 2016 Elle (ellexamines) rated it it was ok

Shelves: z-2015reads, contemporary, 2-star, y-notowned

1.5 stars. This book aims to accurately portray the dangers of cutting and abusive relationships, but it fails by not giving the protagonist a chance to escape or develop. And also by just being... badly written and badly developed. There's just nothing good here.

This book suffers mostly from a heroine who rings false at every turn. Amelia seems naive and frankly kind of stupid. When authors write books about teens who get into bad situations, they need in general to focus on making the characte ...more

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Oct 09, 2016 Amy added it

It was really, REALLY good...but someone please light a pyre of maxi pads and throw my ass on it the next time I say I am going to read a C. Desir book.

Thanks in advance.

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Oct 31, 2013 Stuti Rai rated it really liked it

Shelves: recipe-for-awesomesauce, realistic-fiction

update: song pairing: Tear You Apart by She Wants Revenge The motion, emotion, darkness and everything, if not the story itself

I do think that Christa Desir could actually write an honest love story that people would sing ballads about in centuries to come if she, you know, set out to bring hearts together as opposed to destroying them the world throughout. Her stories, they all start in this slightly skewed, seemingly sunny place, darker things shooed away, only intimated, or well move into suc ...more

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Jan 09, 2014 ExLibris_Kate rated it it was amazing

The first thing you should know about Bleed Like Me is that it is a love story. The second thing you should know is that calling it a love story doesn’t mean it won’t also be very disturbing. Gannon’s family situation is consumed by the three boys her parents adopted a few years ago. She is able to hide her unhappiness, her loneliness, and her cutting within the chaos of her home life. The author does an excellent job of letting you see Gannon’s isolation, so when she meets Brooks it makes perfe The first thing you should know about Bleed Like Me is that it is a love story. The second thing you should know is that calling it a love story doesn’t mean it won’t also be very disturbing. Gannon’s family situation is consumed by the three boys her parents adopted a few years ago. She is able to hide her unhappiness, her loneliness, and her cutting within the chaos of her home life. The author does an excellent job of letting you see Gannon’s isolation, so when she meets Brooks it makes perfect sense for her start a relationship with someone who seems to care about her. The romance, and Gannon’s character, was written in such a way that while her decisions made me cringe, I understood them. Here was someone who noticed Gannon’s cutting and asked her to stop. Here was someone who seemed to care where she went and what she was doing, and there is a seductive power to caring, even when it starts to morph into being controlling and manipulative. That concern and involvement turned into something deeply destructive. Instead of cutting, the relationship with Brooks became the outlet for her pain and, eventually, the reason for it.

I’ve seen a lot of reviews painting this book as one boy’s destruction of a girl who just needed a little attention, but that really wasn’t how I saw it at all. Bleed Like Me is not about one disturbed teen girl and her “bad” boyfriend who wraps her in a spell, it is about two deeply disturbed teens who cling to each other, consume each other, with disastrous results. There is no savior in this relationship and there is no fixing. The depth of the pain that Brooks has If you are looking for Gannon to learn some big lesson by the last page, this isn’t the book for you. In fact, had it gone that direction, it would have done a great disservice to a story that was one of the most raw that I’ve read in a long, long time. Bleed Like Me is not for the faint of heart, to be sure, but its dark and unflinching story grabbed a hold of me and I found that I could not look away. ...more

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Oct 10, 2013 Debbie rated it liked it · review of another edition

Shelves: female-pov, ebook, fell-asleep-while-reading-this, i-don-t-even-know, 2014, arc, skipped-some-pages, adventure, forced-romance, reviewed

2.5 Messed Up Clouds

I believe that Desir can write. However, I'm not sure if she can write a young adult novel that's more than 'okay'. The relationships are great, as well as the tension and the ending however, the writing and the middle, it's all bad. And although I had a few problems with this novel, I didn't find it to be horrible, I still liked it for the most part.

The problem with the writing style is it's all telling rather than showing and makes the story dull because of it. The stor ...more

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Mar 07, 2015 Jazzmine Cap rated it did not like it

It took me a year to read this book. A YEAR. What a major disappointment! After my wife ranted and raved about this book I picked it up and eagerly read about Gannon's tumultuous life. 65 pages in and I was bored. The book takes on a monotone pace and the characters are whiny and dramatic. Brook's could've been such an in depth character and yet he ends up being a drug dealer with a sour relationship with his father. Gannon's family is a nightmare that Desir should have explored in much greater ...more

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Jun 10, 2015 Lexi rated it did not like it

This book was awful & very disturbing. It was worse than an One Direction fanfic. The plot is about a girl who has always felt invisible since her parents adopted 3 boys from Guatemala & then she meet this guy & she feels like he's the only one that notices her (wow shocker). The main characters in this book SUCK, there's no character growth, their lives just get more awful as the story progress. The side characters were way more interesting than the man ones. Then, there's a lot of self harmed ...more

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Oct 12, 2014 Lyn *GLITTER VIKING* marked it as pass

Shelves: cover-lust

Someone mentioned kitten murder.

No. Can't do it. ...more

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Apr 15, 2014 Petra rated it really liked it

This is one of those books that is so hard to describe yet alone rate. So many different types of emotions run through you, all of them unwelcome. All in one, you get so wrapped up in the story until the very end.

Seventeen-year-old Amelia Gannon (just "Gannon" to her friends) is invisible to almost everyone in her life. To her parents, to her teachers-even her best friend, who is more interested in bumming cigarettes than bonding. Some days the only way Gannon knows she is real is by carving blo ...more

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Oct 03, 2014 Grace rated it really liked it

3.5 stars

Full review here =>http://afterdarkbooklovers.com/2014/1...

If you read the synopsis, you saw that this book is compared to the story/movie, Sid & Nancy. If you aren’t familiar with that story, let me warn you . . .

. . .there is no HEA!

What happens when one destructive person gets together with another destructive person? If you expecting that they magically heal each other, think again. And refer to my warning.

The two main characters in this book are not strong. They have been dealt rou ...more

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Oct 12, 2014 Nay Denise rated it it was amazing · review of another edition

Shelves: blog-tours

I received this book from the author in exchange of an honest review.

Bleed Like Me was like no other novel I've read before. It tore my soul to pieces because it was gruesome, heartbreaking, beautiful and disturbing all in one. Christa Desir did a fabulous job writing this beauty.

The story follows two seventeen years old who feel they are both invisible to the world. There's Amelia Gannon -- she lives at home with her mom, father and her three adoptive brothers. At the age of 12 her parents adop I received this book from the author in exchange of an honest review.

Bleed Like Me was like no other novel I've read before. It tore my soul to pieces because it was gruesome, heartbreaking, beautiful and disturbing all in one. Christa Desir did a fabulous job writing this beauty.

The story follows two seventeen years old who feel they are both invisible to the world. There's Amelia Gannon -- she lives at home with her mom, father and her three adoptive brothers. At the age of 12 her parents adopted Alex, Luis and Miguel from Guatemala. She became invisible to her parents and started to harm herself in a way that causes pain -- cutting.

Michael Brooks is a young man who was dealt the wrong hand in life and decided to continuously take the wrong path. He was put in different situations in his home and in juvie that turned him into a miserable young man. He went into a life of drugs and running. He never knew love or happiness.

Brooks meets Gannon and instantly gets smitten by her because she pays attention to him and talks to him. From then on he is determined to have her. In the time he "follows" her Gannon begins to grow feelings for him, but knows that he is dangerous for her. But for her Brooks is her substitute to cutting.

Off the back I knew that Brooks was just no good for Gannon. He was stalking her, always pushing her, and just too possessive in his own way. Gannon deserved way better than him, but having issues at home she fell right into his lap. Their relationship was strange as ever and what pissed me off was that Gannon knew she should not have been with him, but losing herself within him made things worse.

All the events that took place towards the end when they ran away should have been signs to Gannon that something was terribly wrong with Brooks. He was off and constantly doing drugs. He became more demanding and his emotions were like a seesaw. Gannon should have gotten him help but she waited too long, too late.

The ending was a true heartbreaking. I did not expect it to happen the way it did. I didn't think Brooks was so far gone. I definitely cried because it was not beautiful to read, but things happen and it taught me to always find happiness and good in everything that occurs.

If you not good with depression, suicide or self infliction -- do not read this.

Overall -- MARVELOUS piece of work! ...more

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Jun 13, 2016 PinkAmy loves books, cats and naps rated it did not like it

GRADE: D-

ONE WORD: dreadful

BLACK BOX WARNING: ***gratuitous violence against a kitten***

Amelia "Gannon" should be a sympathetic character. She lives with her overwhelmed parents and three undisciplined, monstrous adopted brothers. I could understand why she cut herself to release tension, and why she was closed off toward others, even why she was vulnerable to the stalkerish Brooks. Her sense of hopelessness and her low self-esteem made sense Gannon lost me with how unkindly she treated everyone GRADE: D-

ONE WORD: dreadful

BLACK BOX WARNING: ***gratuitous violence against a kitten***

Amelia "Gannon" should be a sympathetic character. She lives with her overwhelmed parents and three undisciplined, monstrous adopted brothers. I could understand why she cut herself to release tension, and why she was closed off toward others, even why she was vulnerable to the stalkerish Brooks. Her sense of hopelessness and her low self-esteem made sense Gannon lost me with how unkindly she treated everyone who was showed her kindness, her best friend, boss, coworker, teacher who wanted to help.

Gannon's parents were so overwhelmed with her brothers, they looked for her help with the kids and for her to be invisible as not to burden them. In one if the worst examples of poor parental judgment, they are do exhausted from the nonstop chaos of her brothers, they decide leaving the boys with her for a weekend to get away was appropriate. Unfortunately, this can happen in real life.

The worst aspect of Crista Desir's BLEED LIKE ME was the romanticizing of Brooks' stalker-like behavior. When he follows Gannon home and sneaks through her window, this is not courtship. This is creepy and dangerous and should be a harbinger of an unhealthy relationship. Gannon can't see this, she wasn't raised to recognize boundaries, but the way Desir wrote the scenes, without a even Gannon's best friend to provide some moral concept, Desir sends a potentially dangerous message to readers.

Gannon doesn't grow throughout the book, even when she appears to develop some insights, readers don't get to see a payoff. While the ending is open, I found little about which to be optimistic for her. Maybe this is realistic, but Desir could have made a few minor changes to give readers hope of the possibility of overcoming extremely dysfunctional relationships. I like dark books, and I don't need happy endings or resolutions tied in fancy bows. I can't think to whom anyone I'd recommend BLEED LIKE ME, even clients in bad relationships will probably think theirs are healthy in comparison to Brooks and Gannon's.

Desir does have a readable style of writing and I might try another of her novels at some point. I appreciate the story she was trying to tell, but think she could have done so better.
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Mar 27, 2015 Heidi rated it really liked it

Overall, I really enjoyed this read. I had no idea what exactly I was getting into picking this one up, and it definitely surprised me (in a good way).

The most enjoyable aspect of this book for me was the rawness of Gannon and Brooks. This book is without a doubt the edgiest YA I have ever read, and I love that Desir embraced that side of her novel. She definitely didn't shy away from dealing with real issues and difficult emotions, some of which were often as painful to read as they were for Ga ...more

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Sep 23, 2014 Elena rated it liked it

This is a tuff one to rate. I wouldn't say that I ''enjoyed" this book, because, well..I didn't. :'D It was painful.
As in ''it was so sad" and not in "this was just bad". But at the same time there is nothing that made me love this book.
I didn't necessarily like the characters. Especially not Brooks. He definitely is not the kind of person one is going to like. He aggravated me to no end. But I still felt myself sympathize with him at some points in the story.
Almost the same goes for our prot ...more

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May 18, 2014 Dani rated it did not like it

Shelves: did-not-finish

what the fuck. what the fuck. I want to DNF this so hard

when you start reading things like " The blade of the utility knife slid out and my heart thumped faster. I reached to touch his nipple ring and he moved his mouth to my stomach. He licked a small circle around my belly button and then replaced his tongue with the blade. The first cut barely grazed me, but I moaned. ", you know it's time to stop.

i never liked the romance anyway. brooks was creepy and possessive af, and the girl was actually ...more

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Jan 30, 2014 Jen Bigheart rated it it was amazing

Oh, goodness! This is seriously what a mother is most afraid of. Whoah.

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Nov 04, 2016 Erin V rated it did not like it

Shelves: abusive-past, disliked, didn-t-finish, bad-read, mental-health

I read it for a couple hours did not like it at all

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Aug 24, 2014 Jillyn rated it liked it

This is another book that I'm honestly not quite sure how I feel about, let alone how to rate it. I waited a few days before writing this review to let the book sink in, but I'm still torn. This wasn't a bad book, not by a long shot. But I also had a lot of issues with it. I've decided to level it out at a neutral rating of three stars.

The lead character, Gannon, was somehow simultaneously easy and impossible to relate with. On the one hand, she is one of the "punk/goth" girls, and I was one in This is another book that I'm honestly not quite sure how I feel about, let alone how to rate it. I waited a few days before writing this review to let the book sink in, but I'm still torn. This wasn't a bad book, not by a long shot. But I also had a lot of issues with it. I've decided to level it out at a neutral rating of three stars.

The lead character, Gannon, was somehow simultaneously easy and impossible to relate with. On the one hand, she is one of the "punk/goth" girls, and I was one in high school too. I got the whole hanging out at the skate park, smoking, and chilling at Punkin' Donuts. That's all stuff I've done. I really liked too that this story is set in Chicago. This is where I'm from, and it's always nice to read a familiar setting. This will get a little dark for a moment, but I also related to this character because she is a cutter. While I do not have this issue anymore, it is something that I have done in the past. I will say that out of all the books with cutting characters that I've read, Desir has most accurately described the addiction, the satisfaction, the relief, and honestly, the clean up. You'd be surprised how many books don't mention that cutting involves, you know, blood. It may set a darker tone, but at least it's more descriptive and more accurate. On the other hand, I really didn't like how judgmental she was. She judges her family, her "best friend", said friend's romantic interest, the boy who will eventually become her boyfriend. It all seemed a bit overly unpleasant and harsh. Especially coming from someone from an alternative background- normally the most understanding of them all. I also didn't like how she kept saying how she didn't know anything about him and wouldn't sleep with him because of that and didn't want to be too attached... But then does drugs because of him and waits a month for him because he told her to.

I also found it a bit strange that she constantly complains that her parents ignore her and that she's invisible, lost in the chaos of her brothers. But when she gets serious with Brooks, they just tell her to make smart choices. Her dad comes in to give her a "talk", and gives her a box of condoms. She calls this an awkward nightmare.... But he's finally being caring and giving an effort to be in her life. This point is neither positive or negative to the reading experience, I just found it odd.

Which brings me to Brooks, the love interest. He's another character I both loved and hated. I'm not sure how Desir managed to get me to feel so strongly in opposing directions for her characters. On one hand he's pierced and tattooed with dyed bright hair and that's delicious. He's impulsive and broody and weirdly charming. But his past is dark and quickly that changes, and he becomes paranoid and controlling and not very nice. Their romance starts off quirky and oddly sweet. My favorite part is a bit morbid but, he doesn't want her to cut anymore, but she needs the pain, so he digs his fingers along her healing skin, tearing open old wounds. This is dark and toxic and surely unhealthy... But sweet, in a broken kind of way. They're explosive and dangerous together... But you can't help but want to watch the show.

Another issue I had was Gannon's family. She feels bitter towards most of them, understandably so. They were a happy family of three, until they adopted three boys from Guatemala. Her dad largely hides from his responsibilty because they're terrors. The mom babies them and doesn't want to be the disciplinarian ever because they had enough of a hard life in their home country. She lets them get away with murder- literally. They murder a kitten with absolutely zero consequences. She doesn't deserve to keep them honestly. I don't care if it was my kid, I'd call someone. A psychologist, a doctor, a member of the police force. But no, they have dinner like nothing happened because the mom is just happy they're eating. A week later, they actually go to the movies because they behaved for a week since the kitten incident. Nope. Nope. She says at some point that she can't just give them back. You can, actually, and at this rate they deserve to go a better home. They also leave all three kids with Gannon overnight. They can't handle them as adults- what the hell makes you think a kid can?

That said, I give Desir points for diversity. There were a bunch of different types of people represented here and that's a nice change of pace.

And then there's the ending... It's emotional but disappointing. I wasn't left wondering what happened... I was left wondering why I stuck around to finish it.

I know I've said a lot of negative things about this book.... But still I can't help but focus on the way Desir gets in depth about the gritty realism, the descriptions of cutting and the pressures in their lives. It's well detailed and well written and it's easy to get swept into the intense storm that is their relationship. It's a book that'll stay with me in ways I can't quite comprehend.

I recommend it to mature young adult fans who enjoy a darker side of contemporary romance. Be warned this book contains sex, vulgar language, drugs, alcohol, and self harm. Thanks to Simon Teen/Pulse It for the chance to read it. ...more

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About Christa Desir

Christa Desir

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I'm a YA author who loves dark contemporary books. Novels include: FAULT LINE (Oct 2013), BLEED LIKE ME (Oct 2014), OTHER BROKEN THINGS (Jan 2016), LOVE BLIND (May 2016), and FOUR-LETTER WORD (May 2018).

I am also a feminist, rape victim activist, book seller, and romance novel editor. I live outside of Chicago with my husband and our three children.
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