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I Left My Prostate in San Francisco-Where's Yours?

Rick Redner (Goodreads Author),

Brenda Redner

4.41 · Rating details · 17 ratings · 9 reviews

At age 58, I (the author) went to a routine exam in order to obtain a prescription refill. My life was turned upside down when my urologist discovered a suspicious lump on my prostate. This was the beginning of our journey with prostate cancer. I chose Robotic Surgery to treat my cancer. Prostate surgery permanently alters your identity, your sexuality, relationships and o ...more

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Paperback, 255 pages

Published February 28th 2013 by Westbow Press (first published January 18th 2013)

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Apr 08, 2013 Christopher Ackerman rated it really liked it

I left my Prostate in San Francisco—Where’s Yours? is by no means a ringing endorsement for robotic prostate surgery. However, it is a candid and courageous explanation of what patients—and couples—should expect in the months preceding and following this procedure. Through an autobiographical account of their experience with prostate cancer—from diagnosis, to pre-surgery preparation, to the surgery itself, to the recovery process—Rick and Brenda Redner touch upon nearly every aspect of the disea I left my Prostate in San Francisco—Where’s Yours? is by no means a ringing endorsement for robotic prostate surgery. However, it is a candid and courageous explanation of what patients—and couples—should expect in the months preceding and following this procedure. Through an autobiographical account of their experience with prostate cancer—from diagnosis, to pre-surgery preparation, to the surgery itself, to the recovery process—Rick and Brenda Redner touch upon nearly every aspect of the disease.

After reluctantly allowing his physician to perform a routine examination, Rick learned that there was a suspicious lump on his prostate. Then the biopsy confirmed Rick’s worst fear: he had prostate cancer. This disease would disrupt—and irreversibly change—his life in ways that he could not imagine at that time. It would also profoundly alter his relationship with his wife, Brenda.

“A cheerful heart is good medicine.” This proverb highlights the attitude that enabled Rick and Brenda to endure this difficult period in their lives. Their faith in God—and the support of the Christian church—helped them remain sane and optimistic during these dark days. The couple’s reliance on the healing power of laughter, and, more importantly, their commitment to the Christian faith, comes across in every chapter of the book. Aided by humor—and the inspiration of the Scriptures—the authors offer readers (dealing with this disease) vital information relating to the emotional, spiritual, physical, sexual, and psychological effects of prostate cancer.

The majority of the book is written by Rick. He begins by describing his emotional reaction following the dreaded diagnosis. Next he discusses how the biopsy and bone scan affected him physically. Then he explains the reasons for choosing robotic prostate surgery. Finally, he describes the surgery, and the direct effects this procedure had on his urinary control and sexual ability. Yet throughout the book—in various chapters dealing with how to tell family and friends about the diagnosis, who to let into one’s circle of confidence (or on one’s team), and how he felt at every stage of the journey—he dispels popular myths regarding the nature of prostate cancer and surgery. This is invaluable information that one will not find online or in most books written on the subject.

In particular, Rick touches upon the taboo subject of sexuality, discussing specific ways the surgery affected his ability to perform ‘in bed.’ This is a chapter of utmost importance: here the author carefully chronicles the crippling emotions that accompanied his temporary impotence; and compares his experience with other post-surgery cases. He also provides fellow prostate patients dealing with this problem a list of possible solutions, ways to cope, and steps to take in order to regain one’s sexual abilities. Since erectile dysfunction dramatically changes the way couples achieve intimacy, this chapter is especially useful for those who are in a romantic relationship.

Rick writes in a friendly, succinct, journalistic style. This makes the book extremely easy to read. Similarly, Brenda’s prose is very clear. Rick’s humorous and precise account, coupled with Brenda’s spiritually insightful interpretation of this experience (in the concluding chapters), creates an organized and compelling chronicle. Despite the comprehensive nature of the book—as the couple covers a broad array of issues, studies, spiritual perspectives, financial considerations, and medical facts associated with the disease—the authors manage to present their testimony in a coherent and entertaining linear storyline.

Travelers would not want to venture into a dangerous foreign country without the appropriate maps and guidebooks (written by experts who have experienced and studied this region of the world). In the same way, couples dealing with prostate cancer do not want to go on this difficult journey without Rick and Brenda’s book. I Left My Prostate in San Francisco—Where’s Yours? is a work of great medical value told from the personal perspective of two people who fought the disease head-on (with intelligence and passion); and who, remarkably, came out of the experience as better people. This book is a must read for individuals, or couples, facing prostate cancer.
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Mar 15, 2013 Compulsion Reads rated it really liked it

Rick just wanted a refill of his prescription when his doctor insisted on doing a quick prostate check, irrevocably changing Rick’s life. After his doctor felt a lump, he sent out blood work to confirm his suspicions. A few days later, after a grueling wait, Rick was informed that he had prostate cancer. He was now faced with a barrage of tests and decisions to make from his treatment plan to informing his family and everything in between. Rick provides the reader with a very honest description Rick just wanted a refill of his prescription when his doctor insisted on doing a quick prostate check, irrevocably changing Rick’s life. After his doctor felt a lump, he sent out blood work to confirm his suspicions. A few days later, after a grueling wait, Rick was informed that he had prostate cancer. He was now faced with a barrage of tests and decisions to make from his treatment plan to informing his family and everything in between. Rick provides the reader with a very honest description of his challenges as he opted to have his prostate removed. His book explores topics from intimacy, religion and his deeply personal struggles with recovery.

I Left My Prostate in San Francisco- Where’s Yours? is a great book for men who are battling prostate cancer or people who know someone who has been diagnosed. Mr. Redner describes in detail the many ups and downs that come with recovering after having your prostate removed. Each chapter is concluded with questions to discuss with your family or caregiver to help keep you moving down the healing path. I appreciated the humor throughout the book. I can see how dealing with issues of masculinity and dignity could wear on one’s soul, but Redner uses his honesty and humor to push forward. His pearls of wisdom will be very helpful as readers find themselves in similar situations.

While the book is well written and informative, I felt like the last chapters written by Mrs. Redner could have been stronger. These chapters merely retold the challenges that Mr. Redner faced and discussed how she turned to her faith to get through these hard times. I think these chapters could have been more powerful if she discussed the fears that she had as the wife of a man recovering from having his prostate removed. How did she feel when he was unable to perform in the bedroom? How did she deal with him pulling away from their relationship? How did she manage to keep moving forward knowing she could lose her husband to cancer? I think that information would have been much more relatable to a reader.

Overall I would highly recommend this book to anyone who knows anyone who has had their prostate removed or has prostate cancer. You will quickly learn the stress they are going through and how you can be supportive and helpful as they deal with this disease. ...more

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Mar 31, 2013 Amy rated it really liked it

Shelves: goodreads-first-reads, christian, non-fiction

I was given this book by the authors to review.

This book gives an incedibly candid look at one couple's journey through prostate cancer. I learned so much about dealing with cancer on so many levels in this book and think this book may help anyone dealign with cancer.
Even if you are not the one living with the diagnosis this will help you know ways you can help the other person. I realized how important it is to be there for the one with cancer and how important it is if you haev it to forgive ...more

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Mar 18, 2013 Cheryl Malandrinos rated it really liked it

Primarily told from Rick's point of view, the Redners share the journey through Rick's diagnosis, treatment options, surgery, and the post-surgery changes that created challenges for both of them.

With humor and candor, Rick tackles difficult to discuss topics such as living with a catheter, urinary incontinence, depression, erectile dysfunction, and penile rehab. In addition, there are informative chapters about how to share the news with others and how to cope with their reactions, what to expe ...more

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May 15, 2013 Jed Tales rated it it was amazing

News of prostate cancer can seem, to many men, like a signal that their life has come to an end. However, take courage from this wonderful book by Rick and Brenda Redner.

Rick, a cancer sufferer, explains in great depth and detail the steps and decisions necessary to a happy, peaceful and fulfilling life in spite of the disease. Some of the content is unsurprising, if excellent: be careful with great expectations, how to deal with grief and so on. Other chapters contain very precious and importan ...more

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May 14, 2013 James Goulding rated it it was amazing

Rick and Brenda Redner's book is about how to cope with prostate cancer, comprehensively.

A diagnosis of prostate cancer, caught in its early stages, is a bolt from the blue. Rick Redner found out after what he thought was a routine doctor's appointment. He talks us through the challenges he had to face in the aftermath of the cancer diagnosis—so that his mistakes and travails don't need to be repeated. This includes: how to share the fateful news with friends and family; how to enter into a rela ...more

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Apr 08, 2013 Abbie Riddle rated it it was amazing

I received this book from the author and publisher as a review copy. It has taken me longer than I expected to get my review done. I applaud this couple for the open honesty in which they detailed their story. Many people do not even like their names to appear on church prayer lists for this type of cancer. However, a book like this has been long overdue! On my book shelf I have books for all types of cancer, but none for this topic. I could very easily recommend books to anyone, and now for the ...more

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Feb 02, 2013 Ed rated it it was amazing · review of another edition

This book is a very frank discussion and an in-depth exploration of the issues facing men with prostate cancer. The author's willingness to share intimate details of his personal journey with prostate cancer will help the rest of us avoid some of the pitfalls that he encountered.

I would recommend this book to any man facing an elevated PSA. It would also be helpful to the partner of any man with such a diagnosis.

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Mar 16, 2013 Patricia Atkinson rated it it was amazing

i found it was a very good book.being in my late 40s it was interesting because alot of my friends and family are at the age that prostate tests are done every year.no one wants to get it done but this book shows what can happen and if it does where to find help along the was.this book is educational and people should be glad how you and your wife let us into your life.....

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About Rick Redner

Rick Redner

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Rick received his Master’s Degree in Social Work from Michigan State University, He spent two years as Director of Social Services at Doctors Hospital in Modesto. From there, he decided to become an entrepreneur, owning and operating two sandwich shops for the past 31 years.

Brenda received her RN/BSN from Michigan State University. Brenda has worked in Home Health Care, Oncology, Psychiatric Nursi ...more