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The Fear Book: Facing Fear Once and for All
Rather than explaining typical strategies for overcoming fear, this book focuses on examining how fear is experience, how to recognize that experience as nothing more than conditioned reaction to circumstance, and how to mentor oneself into letting go of beliefs about "appropriate" responses to fear. The notion is debunked that fear is anything other than a label we have learned to put on a set of physical and emotional responses, which is a Buddhist view of emotion in general.
168 pages, Paperback
First published September 1, 1995
About the author
Cheri Huber
53 books152 followersCheri Huber, author of 20 books, has been a student and teacher of Zen for over 35 years. In 1983, Cheri founded the Mountain View Zen Center, and in 1987 she founded the Zen Monastery Peace Center near Murphys, California. She and the monks at the Monastery conduct workshops and retreats at these centers, other places around the U.S., and internationally.
In 1997, Cheri founded Living Compassion, a nonprofit organization dedicated to peace and service. Living Compassion’s primary work is the Africa Vulnerable Children Project, based in Zambia, where for over a decade they have been working with the people of Kantolomba, beginning the process of turning a slum of 11,000 people into a self-sustaining community.
Cheri also has a weekly Internet based radio show.
In 1997, Cheri founded Living Compassion, a nonprofit organization dedicated to peace and service. Living Compassion’s primary work is the Africa Vulnerable Children Project, based in Zambia, where for over a decade they have been working with the people of Kantolomba, beginning the process of turning a slum of 11,000 people into a self-sustaining community.
Cheri also has a weekly Internet based radio show.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 38 reviews
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October 25, 2010These jumped out at me:
pg 1-2
Fear is a very useful signal along the path to freedom. The stronger the fear, the closer you are to what you are seeking. If you want to stay "safe" (i.e., stuck where you are), fear tells you to stop what you are doing. But if you want to be free, fear lets you know you are on the right track, it is a signal to push ahead in the same direction, to pick up the pace.
pg 54 - 55
If you no longer believe what fear tells you, you will live and it will not. That is a point on the spiritual journey that almost nobody gets past. When that terror arises, when it gets backed into a corner and it is a matter of its survival or yours, almost nobody has the required combination of courage, desperation, willingness -- to stand up to it. When this force in you that has controlled and motivated you all your life is screaming, "If you do that you're going to die!" very few people are going to say, "Well, I just need to find out if that is so." That's why it is so important to remember that projection is going on. What's being screamed is, "If you stay with this, I will die." And that's true: "I" will die. Its life is your death. Its death is your life.
pg 1-2
Fear is a very useful signal along the path to freedom. The stronger the fear, the closer you are to what you are seeking. If you want to stay "safe" (i.e., stuck where you are), fear tells you to stop what you are doing. But if you want to be free, fear lets you know you are on the right track, it is a signal to push ahead in the same direction, to pick up the pace.
pg 54 - 55
If you no longer believe what fear tells you, you will live and it will not. That is a point on the spiritual journey that almost nobody gets past. When that terror arises, when it gets backed into a corner and it is a matter of its survival or yours, almost nobody has the required combination of courage, desperation, willingness -- to stand up to it. When this force in you that has controlled and motivated you all your life is screaming, "If you do that you're going to die!" very few people are going to say, "Well, I just need to find out if that is so." That's why it is so important to remember that projection is going on. What's being screamed is, "If you stay with this, I will die." And that's true: "I" will die. Its life is your death. Its death is your life.
July 17, 2022
Wow. I am wondering whether I should wait to write a review of this book after I have time to process it, but frankly I am riding a high of all the insights Huber has given me into the way fear manifests itself, so I am going to write my review now.
The cover of the The Fear Book, the handwriting, and the illustrations all give it the appearance of some children's guidebook to conquering the monster under the bed, but, as Huber says, looking at the magician's hands makes you miss what is actually going on. It is the content of this book that makes it spectacular, not the appearance.
The buddhist approach to handling fear seems daunting. You will no doubt find yourself asking, "How could this possibly work?" This is how we struggle to rid ourselves of fear. By allowing fear to minimize our world, we give ourselves fewer opportunities to find true joy. I noticed myself worrying while reading this book, but by asking myself the questions Huber outlines and recognizing that most of them were worries about a future I could not control, I watched them go away. Some of them resurfaced later, and I went through the same process.
Huber's posit that fear is entirely bad, that even the survival mechanisms we attribute to fear are bad, is fascinating. In actual near-death experiences, Huber says most people do not have time to be afraid. The reason we do not jump off bridges does not have to be fear; we can rely on our experience and intelligence to reach the same conclusion. We can explore how fear shows itself as our own mentors, not relying on the outcome, but rather on the fact that we are putting in the effort. Wanting the outcome immediately is another way fear can protect itself, and to that I say, "Isn't it better to continue searching your whole life than to never try at all?"
I have never put so little effort into a book to reap such large rewards. I highly recommend it.
The cover of the The Fear Book, the handwriting, and the illustrations all give it the appearance of some children's guidebook to conquering the monster under the bed, but, as Huber says, looking at the magician's hands makes you miss what is actually going on. It is the content of this book that makes it spectacular, not the appearance.
The buddhist approach to handling fear seems daunting. You will no doubt find yourself asking, "How could this possibly work?" This is how we struggle to rid ourselves of fear. By allowing fear to minimize our world, we give ourselves fewer opportunities to find true joy. I noticed myself worrying while reading this book, but by asking myself the questions Huber outlines and recognizing that most of them were worries about a future I could not control, I watched them go away. Some of them resurfaced later, and I went through the same process.
Huber's posit that fear is entirely bad, that even the survival mechanisms we attribute to fear are bad, is fascinating. In actual near-death experiences, Huber says most people do not have time to be afraid. The reason we do not jump off bridges does not have to be fear; we can rely on our experience and intelligence to reach the same conclusion. We can explore how fear shows itself as our own mentors, not relying on the outcome, but rather on the fact that we are putting in the effort. Wanting the outcome immediately is another way fear can protect itself, and to that I say, "Isn't it better to continue searching your whole life than to never try at all?"
I have never put so little effort into a book to reap such large rewards. I highly recommend it.
August 28, 2020
No one can summarize this better than my own daughter so I'm pasting her review after this paragraph. This is an exceptional book that shows length has nothing to do with excellence, and can even detract from it--this book should not be a word longer.
***
Wow. I am wondering whether I should wait to write a review of this book after I have time to process it, but frankly I am riding a high of all the insights Huber has given me into the way fear manifests itself, so I am going to write my review now.
The cover of the The Fear Book, the handwriting, and the illustrations all give it the appearance of some children's guidebook to conquering the monster under the bed, but, as Huber says, looking at the magician's hands makes you miss what is actually going on. It is the content of this book that makes it spectacular, not the appearance.
The buddhist approach to handling fear seems daunting. You will no doubt find yourself asking, "How could this possibly work?" This is how we struggle to rid ourselves of fear. By allowing fear to minimize our world, we give ourselves fewer opportunities to find true joy. I noticed myself worrying while reading this book, but by asking myself the questions Huber outlines and recognizing that most of them were worries about a future I could not control, I watched them go away. Some of them resurfaced later, and I went through the same process.
Huber's posit that fear is entirely bad, that even the survival mechanisms we attribute to fear are bad, is fascinating. In actual near-death experiences, Huber says most people do not have time to be afraid. The reason we do not jump off bridges does not have to be fear; we can rely on our experience and intelligence to reach the same conclusion. We can explore how fear shows itself as our own mentors, not relying on the outcome, but rather on the fact that we are putting in the effort. Wanting the outcome immediately is another way fear can protect itself, and to that I say, "Isn't it better to continue searching your whole life than to never try at all?"
I have never put so little effort into a book to reap such large rewards. I highly recommend it.
***
Wow. I am wondering whether I should wait to write a review of this book after I have time to process it, but frankly I am riding a high of all the insights Huber has given me into the way fear manifests itself, so I am going to write my review now.
The cover of the The Fear Book, the handwriting, and the illustrations all give it the appearance of some children's guidebook to conquering the monster under the bed, but, as Huber says, looking at the magician's hands makes you miss what is actually going on. It is the content of this book that makes it spectacular, not the appearance.
The buddhist approach to handling fear seems daunting. You will no doubt find yourself asking, "How could this possibly work?" This is how we struggle to rid ourselves of fear. By allowing fear to minimize our world, we give ourselves fewer opportunities to find true joy. I noticed myself worrying while reading this book, but by asking myself the questions Huber outlines and recognizing that most of them were worries about a future I could not control, I watched them go away. Some of them resurfaced later, and I went through the same process.
Huber's posit that fear is entirely bad, that even the survival mechanisms we attribute to fear are bad, is fascinating. In actual near-death experiences, Huber says most people do not have time to be afraid. The reason we do not jump off bridges does not have to be fear; we can rely on our experience and intelligence to reach the same conclusion. We can explore how fear shows itself as our own mentors, not relying on the outcome, but rather on the fact that we are putting in the effort. Wanting the outcome immediately is another way fear can protect itself, and to that I say, "Isn't it better to continue searching your whole life than to never try at all?"
I have never put so little effort into a book to reap such large rewards. I highly recommend it.
May 23, 2014
This book looks simple, even childish, but is very powerful. I was loaned this book and read it several times before returning it. May need to get a copy of my own, to re-read once in a while.
I was in a very, very dark and scary place at the time, almost paralyzed by a set of seemingly-insurmountable circumstances, and unable to handle (or even deal with civilly) the well-meaning advice of friends and family. I did not take well to being handed this book, but eventually, in desperation, sat up in bed in the middle of the night and read it. This book is very accessible. Made a big difference, and helped me tremendously.
I was in a very, very dark and scary place at the time, almost paralyzed by a set of seemingly-insurmountable circumstances, and unable to handle (or even deal with civilly) the well-meaning advice of friends and family. I did not take well to being handed this book, but eventually, in desperation, sat up in bed in the middle of the night and read it. This book is very accessible. Made a big difference, and helped me tremendously.
June 4, 2012
There are a lot of self-help books out there, but this is much more than a self-help book. Reading this book is more like having a conversation with a wise being who gently guides you to listen to your inner voices of wisdom and clarity. I know I will come back to this book again and again, and I wish I had read it earlier.
October 6, 2011
I didn't think this book would have a lot for me, since I don't think of myself as experiencing "fear" that often. But I do experience "anxiety," and in reading this book I realized they are essentially the same thing. Huge, helpful awareness.
January 29, 2021
I was surprised by the quality of the content this book had to offer . No secret methods or BS theories , the author tells you why it would be better to understand your fears rather than avoid or conquer them . It has helped to understand a different approach to fear. This is a book I would a have to re-read multiple times , but it’s well worth it .
September 5, 2015
A quick read, getting to the heart of zen practice...staying in the midst of strong emotion & investigating its nature, how it rules our lives & destroys our freedom. Huber's writing sometimes left people confused in our small study group, but sorting that out actually made for good discussions, gave everyone an opportunity to express their understanding of what was being said about practicing with fear. This often lead to insight into fear's nature, or new perspectives on how to approach working with it.
The Fear Book is not Dharma-heavy, it is more practice based. The Buddha and his teachings are not mentioned. There's no lists of antidotes, no mention of emptiness or bodhisattvas, just....You sit down & fear comes up. What do you do?
The Fear Book is not Dharma-heavy, it is more practice based. The Buddha and his teachings are not mentioned. There's no lists of antidotes, no mention of emptiness or bodhisattvas, just....You sit down & fear comes up. What do you do?
April 1, 2015
OK. I "get it" a lot better now. This book is an excellent tool for starting to disassociate oneself from one's fear and get a good look at it – to get to the bottom of it and maybe work through it. There's enough difference from The Depression Book that I didn't feel like I was rereading the same book, but enough overlap that I could say, "Yeah, I needed to hear that again." Another great step along my (or anyone's) road back to wholeness.
October 3, 2020
This book echoes my favorite lesson from a clinical social work class: The secret is that there is no secret. The author explains that the belief that there is a "right" and "wrong" way of overcoming any obstacle keeps us stuck. She instead teaches us how to be our own compassionate mentors along our life's journey. What a gift!
October 18, 2014
I read this, IT WAS EXCELLENT. It's one of those books you read again and again and again. I forgot to review it at the time... and I think I read it in... August? - Best guess.
It was really, really helpful.
It was really, really helpful.
October 15, 2014
Filled with platitudes that don't really say much of anything, I found Chris Huber's The Fear Book to be vaguely annoying. While the basic precepts are sound, and the examination of the process and experience of fear interesting, the overall thrust of the book was not very useful for me.
March 3, 2017
Should be read by all teens and reread by all adults planning to be parents! And the fact that such a quick read could make a TREMENDOUS difference in the well-being of your child...well, it's never too late!
February 25, 2008
I love cheri huber books...She is a budhist monk....and her books are really easy reading... she hand writes the book and includes really cute hand drawn sketches to illustrate her ideas.
March 21, 2018
Lovely, meditative read—biggest takeaway: being a mentor to yourself is the quickest way to eliminate fear.
March 15, 2021
A decent read here imo. Largely agreed with a number of ideas, but also found some arguments to be unpersuasive and simplistic. As a result, didn't get a whole lot out of this.
(+) Agreed with the compassionate awareness piece and about viewing emotions from a 3rd person POV and not identifying strongly with them.
(+) Made me think about the impact parents' actions can have on their kids.
(-) Felt confused when the author seemed to be pushing the idea that fear is this all-bad emotion and something to get rid of v.s developing a more healthy, welcoming relationship with the emotion. Might be a misread on my part, but I do agree with the latter theme.
(-) Wondered why the author didn't talk through a natural selection lens of fear potentially leading to a greater chance of survival. Relates to another issue I had with the big being overly simplistic. Maybe this is intentional given the writing and visual style of the book.
(-) Disagreed with the idea that "there is no such thing as a mistake" and that all mistakes are events that people can grow from. While the latter might be true, I would've liked to see the author acknowledge that there can be negative effects on yourself/other people when mistakes occur. Yes, the thing you are worrying about will likely not kill you, but there is a large spectrum of outcomes between life going perfectly and death.
(+/-) Don't really understand the need for the line breaks and random placement of phrases. Felt like a Rupi Kaur poem. Might be more of a personal nit here. Like another reviewer mentioned, the book's design gives it a ceiling.
(+) Agreed with the compassionate awareness piece and about viewing emotions from a 3rd person POV and not identifying strongly with them.
(+) Made me think about the impact parents' actions can have on their kids.
(-) Felt confused when the author seemed to be pushing the idea that fear is this all-bad emotion and something to get rid of v.s developing a more healthy, welcoming relationship with the emotion. Might be a misread on my part, but I do agree with the latter theme.
(-) Wondered why the author didn't talk through a natural selection lens of fear potentially leading to a greater chance of survival. Relates to another issue I had with the big being overly simplistic. Maybe this is intentional given the writing and visual style of the book.
(-) Disagreed with the idea that "there is no such thing as a mistake" and that all mistakes are events that people can grow from. While the latter might be true, I would've liked to see the author acknowledge that there can be negative effects on yourself/other people when mistakes occur. Yes, the thing you are worrying about will likely not kill you, but there is a large spectrum of outcomes between life going perfectly and death.
(+/-) Don't really understand the need for the line breaks and random placement of phrases. Felt like a Rupi Kaur poem. Might be more of a personal nit here. Like another reviewer mentioned, the book's design gives it a ceiling.
January 17, 2021
Enjoyed, but mildly. I (not sure why really) had high expectations for this book because of the "fear" theme. At this point in my life, more than addition, I am looking to remove certain things from my being - fear being one of them. The book's design gave it a ceiling immediately - written in big font hand writing. It did have little doodles/pictures that I enjoyed and the ease of read was nice. Huber fell into the classic "case study syndrome" that many of these type of books fall into, towards the end. Overall, the contents were great, but I felt could be better expounded upon in a longer, more concise text. Worth a good read, but nothing incredibly valuable caught my attention.
April 24, 2021
An excellent guide to understanding the many ways that fear can manifest itself and how we can reconceptualize the experience of fear so that we can lead fuller and more rewarding lives.
“Fear is a very useful signal along the path to freedom. The stronger the fear, the closer you are to what you are seeking. If you want to stay "safe" (i.e., stuck where you are), fear tells you to stop what you are doing. But if you want to be free, fear lets you know you are on the right track, it is a signal to push ahead in the same direction, to pick up the pace.”
“Fear is a process, a recognizable series of steps. The antidote to fear is presence.”
“The primary technique for dealing with fear is to move from being the one who is afraid to be in the one who can assist the one who is afraid.”
-Cheri Huber
“Fear is a very useful signal along the path to freedom. The stronger the fear, the closer you are to what you are seeking. If you want to stay "safe" (i.e., stuck where you are), fear tells you to stop what you are doing. But if you want to be free, fear lets you know you are on the right track, it is a signal to push ahead in the same direction, to pick up the pace.”
“Fear is a process, a recognizable series of steps. The antidote to fear is presence.”
“The primary technique for dealing with fear is to move from being the one who is afraid to be in the one who can assist the one who is afraid.”
-Cheri Huber
October 16, 2021
This was recommended to me by a colleague when they heard that my anxiety was getting worse and I am so glad that they did.
Huber's writing style is one that I am familiar with as I have read previous books by her; namely "There is Nothing Wrong with You" and "The Key"; and I will continue to state how easy to follow and read her books are.
Anxiety is just another term for fear, and fear is not something a human HAS to face. The Fear Book takes the reader on a journey of how to face fears and dissociate ones self from those fears so they don't hold you back. Now all I have to do it put it into practice.
Huber's writing style is one that I am familiar with as I have read previous books by her; namely "There is Nothing Wrong with You" and "The Key"; and I will continue to state how easy to follow and read her books are.
Anxiety is just another term for fear, and fear is not something a human HAS to face. The Fear Book takes the reader on a journey of how to face fears and dissociate ones self from those fears so they don't hold you back. Now all I have to do it put it into practice.
December 31, 2022
I've never tried to review a self-help book. I borrowed this one from my therapist to help with my phobias and “fear of fear”. My takeaway from the book is that I should separate myself from that fear and look at it as a person to act as a comfort and mentor for myself. I think the book was creatively written and easy to read. I wasn't intimidated, so it didn't make me triggered in any way. I guess I rated it 3 stars because there was nothing special about it and it wasn't like an intellectual “Oh my God, this is life-changing” psychological novel.
September 18, 2018
A book that I am sure I will revisit often :-)
September 4, 2020
I recommend this book for anyone struggling with fear. The author has a clear way of breaking down why we have fear and how to make efforts to avoid it.
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February 28, 2021I want this ebook badly, its not available here in amazon,can anyone pls send me this ebook.
pratikghosh334@gmail.com
This is my email.
Would really appreciate your help
pratikghosh334@gmail.com
This is my email.
Would really appreciate your help
April 24, 2023
Thank you. Aho matakuye oyasin
November 30, 2015
A patron recommended this author to me, and while I got some stuff out of it, it was different from what I expected. Much of what Huber says seems to address a specific kind of fear: an anxiety about performance. This is helpful, but I would also be interested in hearing her talk about fear induced by trauma. Like, she looks a lot at fear of trying something new or failing that has come about by adults telling you how to be careful growing up. But what about fear that isn't socially prescribed, but the result of bad things actually happening? She addresses fear of what might happen, not fear of what has happened, and though what she says is relevant to most types of fear, I think traumatic fear could have used more attention in a book about fear.
Some good quotes:
"Anxiety is the dead of an experience that I won't be able to stand."
Procrastinating on looking at fear is "regrettable because at that point it has all become so serious and so grim that we don't see that it can be interesting and fun."
"First I learn to disidentify from that part of me who is afraid. Until I disidentify and move into the mentor role, I m incapable of compassionate response."
"Fear is the hunted, not the hunter. Fear is the quarry you must stalk and confront and unmask. The stronger the fear, the closer you are to what you are seeking."
"When I approach everything as an opportunity to heal, there is nothing that will not be available to me."
"Fear is not what keeps us safe, intelligence is."
"Fear is a very useful signal along the path to freedom. The stronger the fear, the closer you are to what you are seeking. If you want to stay "safe" (i.e., stuck where you are), fear tells you to stop what you are doing. But if you want to be free, fear lets you know you are on the right track, it is a signal to push ahead in the same direction, to pick up the pace."
Some good quotes:
"Anxiety is the dead of an experience that I won't be able to stand."
Procrastinating on looking at fear is "regrettable because at that point it has all become so serious and so grim that we don't see that it can be interesting and fun."
"First I learn to disidentify from that part of me who is afraid. Until I disidentify and move into the mentor role, I m incapable of compassionate response."
"Fear is the hunted, not the hunter. Fear is the quarry you must stalk and confront and unmask. The stronger the fear, the closer you are to what you are seeking."
"When I approach everything as an opportunity to heal, there is nothing that will not be available to me."
"Fear is not what keeps us safe, intelligence is."
"Fear is a very useful signal along the path to freedom. The stronger the fear, the closer you are to what you are seeking. If you want to stay "safe" (i.e., stuck where you are), fear tells you to stop what you are doing. But if you want to be free, fear lets you know you are on the right track, it is a signal to push ahead in the same direction, to pick up the pace."
March 27, 2013
Pretty good, quick little read with a few "aha" moments. My moderate rating is just because it was a bit repetitive in parts, and some of the writing wasn't very clear. I've got a few of her others in my to-read pile though, and am still looking forward to them!
July 30, 2013
So good. Love Cheri's books. Had this book for years and finally read it. Ya gotta love zen. A new way of looking at fear...its not the content, ie what you are of afraid of but the process. Awareness is the key.
November 22, 2015
Quick read but lots of information written in a very informal manner. The main theme of the book is to see fear for what it is and to identify it as only fear and not allow it to overwhelm your ability to live.
June 28, 2008
Did not like it as much as her others, but it was still helpful.
December 2, 2008
A must read for any soul living a human experience.
Displaying 1 - 30 of 38 reviews