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Why Mars and Venus Collide
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Why Mars and Venus Collide

3.82  ·  Rating details ·  1,292 ratings  ·  167 reviews

Once upon a time, Martians and Venusians functioned in separate worlds. But in today's hectic and career-oriented environment, relationships have become a lot more complicated, and men and women are experiencing unprecedented levels of stress. To add to the increasing tension, most men and women are also completely unaware that they are actually hardwired to react differen

Paperback, Large Print, 372 pages
Published February 1st 2008 by HarperLuxe (first published May 8th 2007)
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Average rating 3.82  · 
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Skylar Burris
Jan 12, 2009 rated it it was ok  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: marriage
Synopsis: Men and women are different. In the event that you have already figured this out after several years of marriage, this book may yet give you some comfort in knowing you are not alone in your frustrations. "Why Mars and Venus Collide" did have some helpful advice. However, I think those helpful nuggets were already lodged in his early book, "Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus." (There appears to be some gratuitous repackaging going on here.)

I confess that while I was reading this
Jacqueline Williams
Apr 21, 2008 rated it it was amazing
A very validating book, and an incredibly fast read. Explains how men and women deal with stress, with real-life examples that ring so true. Talks about the BIOLOGICAL and biochemical differences between men and women, and for me, learning that some things are biological changes my perspecive a lot. Here are some excerpts I liked from the book:

"Being aware of our innate biochemical differences frees us from the unhealthy compulsion to change our partners and eventually leads us to celebrate our
Feb 21, 2011 rated it it was ok  ·  review of another edition
This book makes a compelling point for becoming a lesbian ... or a man. Women can do and think about more than one thing at a time and men can only do one thing at a time and need to be told what needs to be done - which would you rather have for a partner? Women should lower their expectations of the men in their lives, so as not to be disappointed by them.

There is some truth in this book, hence the 2 stars instead of 1, but I still don't like it.

Partially because I'm not a stereotypical woman,
Feb 20, 2009 rated it it was ok  ·  review of another edition
This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers. To view it, click here.
Actually marking this book as "read" is a total lie. Very rarely do I not finish a book and up until now I have never thrown a book across the room in a display of displeasure and frustration. This book infuriated me. A very close friend of mine recommended the book to me and swore up and down that it truly helped her with her relationships. I could only read the first two chapters before I threw the book across the room and decided enough was enough. The author's views are extremely esoteric, s ...more
Oct 12, 2013 rated it it was ok
This was the first book I've ever read by John Gray, and I only picked it because my library's e-book selection is limited and there wasn't much available to check out in the Relationship genre. This book does have some helpful communication techniques that might be worth trying if your marriage is in deep trouble, but I did take issue with some of it...

Gray strives to explain the hormonal differences between men and women and how these differences cause wildly different behaviors and attitudes.
Ashley Mcphee
Sep 18, 2011 rated it liked it
While I found this book immensely helpful in understanding my partner better and learning to adjust my expectations, I also found the book to be slightly sexist.

The author also makes frequent allusions to religion/spirituality and seeking out a therapist as important tools without acknowledging that for some people these are not options or priorities.

The book makes many references to research about the brain, hormones, and evolution, which makes it seem very credible. I found the sections part
Sara Sherzad
May 19, 2018 rated it it was amazing
It took me so long to finish with this book but to be honest I didn't want it to finish at all because it certainly was an adventure for me and I loved every bit of it.

Coming to the book it's obvious from it's title that it deals with Mars and Venus issues but totally brilliantly. Every word I read seemed real to me as a Venusian and as far as I have checked (with my husband) to a Martian as well. The author has mixed psychology with scientific facts with medical facts and that made a totally c
Feb 01, 2009 rated it did not like it
Shelves: sexuality
Pseudo-science raised to an art form. If there is any stereotypical behavior that can't be simplistically explained and justified by hormonal differences, it hasn't entered the author's darkest dreams.
Dec 22, 2017 rated it did not like it
such a sexist book! there is nothing worth reading it!
Madhulika Liddle
Jan 22, 2019 rated it it was ok
I had read the blockbuster bestseller Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus so many years back that I’d pretty much forgotten it. Why Mars & Venus Collide, the ‘essential companion’ to that book was gifted to me (by a total stranger, not someone who knows of my relationship with my husband), and I approached it with some hesitation: I am not keen on self-help or self-improvement books.

And yes, my fears, to some extent, proved well-founded.

But, first, what the book is about. Basically, men an
Nov 12, 2017 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition

The cover have explained its content approriately I must say. Just to make it clear, Mars in the title refers to men while Venus refers to women, therefore, the title itself is self-explanatory. Why do men and women fight? Its focus, romantic relationship between these two.

It starts by explaining about different hormones that make men and women feel good. Different hormones ---> different needs = different train of thoughts = different ways to cope with stress. I don't know if the horm
Sep 17, 2018 rated it it was ok  ·  review of another edition
Even though the author made some interesting points, and a lot of the examples rang true, I was distracted by his condescending tone. I was also frustrated that the book was only geared toward female readers, which I felt was a somewhat insulting assumption of attitudinal responses to relationship stress. Overall, most of the onus is on women to adjust their behavior and I couldn’t help but be annoyed at this unequal gender split!
Jun 22, 2008 rated it did not like it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: 2008
I didn't get through this one, it blew chunks.

Any time there are lists of stuff like '100 ways to increase her oxytossin' I tend to glaze over. But the idea of having a Venus conversation ended it for me.

The pertinent information could have been delivered on one CD and still had room for a mini Ozz-fest...
Mar 05, 2009 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
I really enjoy John Gray. He is my favorite author and teacher on relationships. By learning the differences between men and women , it is so much easier to keep a healthy relationship. this book is about how men and women act differently to every day stress. I have most of his books and never been dissapointed. He is great.
May 25, 2012 rated it really liked it
John Gray's books still hold lots of ideas about sex roles that I don't relate to, or am somewhat uncomfortable with, but this title seems to carry some scientific thoughts on the different ways that men and women handle stress that can lead to misunderstandings. But I'm guessing that no matter how many books I read about male-female relationships, they will continue to baffle me :-)
Jun 18, 2009 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
This book is the best! I feel so much happier and less stressed!!! Jared has seen and benefitted from the dramatic lessons I've learned that are contained in this magic book :) I have a little bit left to go, but as soon as I'm done I think he will read it too.
Amina Elidrissy
Oct 10, 2014 rated it really liked it
Shelves: amor-marriage
very helpful book to understand how both man & woman deal with stress and then collide, in addition of the tips to bring peace at home through communication & well chosen words ...more
Veronica Athanasiou
Oct 14, 2016 rated it it was amazing
Answers how to get over the difference in mentality between men and women as it is explained by their hormones. Nothing can beat explanations based on human physiology.
Jonna 🐼 Panda Josefine
Oct 12, 2019 rated it really liked it
Why Mars and Venus collide;

John Gray might just be my favorite at the moment! 😍

This book focus more on stress and how our hormones are related to internal stress. Men and women deal with stress differently and therefor it’s hard for a man to comfort or help a woman dealing with stress and vice versa. Men and women also often get stressed about completely different things. We can’t always help someone from the opposite gender the way we want to be helped but customize our ways depending on the p
Thomas Hettich
Dec 29, 2016 rated it really liked it
Recommended to Thomas by: Alvin Cheong
Shelves: 2012, 2013
I received this book as a goodbye present from the SEA Client Development team and the, then, newly established SEA GFO team at UBS Singapore. Actually I think Alvin picked out the book as he knew of my struggles since moving to Singapore and that not all reasons why I was to embark on a geographic and industry move (into non-profit) were professional. Also, he was just about to get married himself and might have consulted this book in the weeks and months before ;-)

Since 2012 I have become good
Any Length
Nov 30, 2019 rated it really liked it
Well at first I felt like John Gray was using the mars, venus words way too often but that settled down. Then I thought "I've read all this before in a book by A. + B. Pease. But then I pulled myself together and decided not to give up just yet and see what else John Gray had to say. And... I was richly rewarded. If you are stressed at all whether you are a man or a woman, do yourself a favour and read this book. Even if it is only to read about the fact that men and women need totally different ...more
Dec 29, 2017 rated it it was ok
I had high hopes for this book, but was overall pretty disappointed. In the beginning, the author introduced his main point many times without actually getting to what his main point was. When he actually got to his main point, the rest of the book seemed to be just a repetition of the same thoughts with various sentence structures. There were some really great ideas, but overall, the book was disappointing.
Agnė Pasaravičienė
This I a great read for those who connected with author's the most famous work "Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus". I found his book inspiring to improve my understanding of physiological differences in between the genders. The first few chapters were a quite fascinating read for me, the second half of the book had a lot of repetitions of the ideas represented in the previous chapters. Despite of that, I believe that fans of John Gray will not be disappointed.
Tammy Frew
Jun 21, 2017 rated it really liked it
this was the first time ever when I finished one of the Mars Venus books this particular book was very beneficial was identifying how the male and female minds work and what happens when they Clash offers tools to help bring conflict resolution to a minimum allowing for better understanding of how the other person thinks
Azri Asmon
Apr 05, 2019 rated it it was amazing
Men and woman not only respond to stress in unique ways, but the kind of support they need to relieve the stress is different as well. Accepting the differences can immediately lighten up our relationship. Remembering and understanding our differences are only half of the battle, the other half is action.
Jun 18, 2020 rated it liked it
In general, the book was good and gives lots of facts on why men and women are different. However, I felt like some parts are repetitive. In my opinion, at least one third of the pages could have been reduced.
Wesam Karam
Jun 07, 2018 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
very good book
any one can have it and win love easy
Doug McGuire
Jul 12, 2018 rated it it was amazing
Yet another good book addressing the difference between the sexes.
Makarem Ali
Sep 09, 2018 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Very interesting and helpful
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Librarian Note: There is more than one author in the GoodReads database with this name.

John Gray is an American author on relationships and personal growth, best known for his 1992 book Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus, and other "pop psychology" books offering relationship advice.

He was previously married to fellow self-help author Barbara De Angelis, but they divorced in 1984. He is now m

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