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Your Brain on Love: The Neurobiology of Healthy Relationships
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Your Brain on Love: The Neurobiology of Healthy Relationships

4.35  ·  Rating details ·  439 ratings  ·  49 reviews
Shift Out of Conflict and into Connection, Safety, and Intimacy

"Improve your brain, improve your relationships." That's what Stan Tatkin has learned from his leading-edge work as a researcher and couples therapist. In this complete audio learning program, he merges current insights from neurobiology and attachment theory to help you shift out of conflict and into deeper an
Audio CD, 6 pages
Published July 1st 2013 by Sounds True
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Average rating 4.35  · 
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 ·  439 ratings  ·  49 reviews

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Oct 20, 2017 rated it it was amazing
This was a really lovely book about relationships. In a culture that overemphasizes independence, to the detriment of our ability to form meaningful connections, this was a refreshing take on relationships and the importance of interdependence. It stems from an attachment based perspective, and I want to recommend it to every one of my clients.
Dec 16, 2017 rated it it was amazing
The author seems very grounded in attachment theory, and is very clear regarding research which puts great value on relationship. In many ways, this is a book of solid advice on navigating relationship. And, the author is very clear that none of this is necessarily dysfunction, but he is very clear on the consequence of the acts. It's a relatively short book, and well worth the time. ...more
Nov 01, 2019 rated it really liked it
Fact 1: there is nothing more difficult than another person.
Tatkin has a realistic, freeing take on what it takes to be(coming) a healthy human bean. Not so much a new perspective, but freshly remixed. Read by the author. I enjoyed listening to him & I'm probably going to circle back to this one.
Sep 21, 2020 rated it it was amazing
Really useful frameworks to approach a healthy committed relationship
Oct 27, 2018 rated it it was amazing
Excellent and practical information. Incredible to find out that some of my most perplexing behaviors in relationship are actually neurobiological and quite common patterns. Helpful on all levels.
Alex Annear
May 25, 2016 rated it it was amazing
Less a book than a podcast, since Tatkin is really just speaking off the cuff, but he's really darn good at it. It's like a personal therapy session, and I thought it really, really worked. Incredibly useful stuff. ...more
Laila Hassaballa
Aug 09, 2013 rated it it was amazing
Makes relationships so simple and accepting. This is definitely a great reference! My favorite relationship book so far.
Nov 06, 2014 rated it it was amazing
This is a different take on how to improve your romantic relationships and I buy it. Good advice you probably haven't read elsewhere. ...more
Georgia Comins
Sep 29, 2020 rated it really liked it
Really great listen and loved the fact that so much of the insights are based around attachment theory which is something I have really enjoyed learning about before and that made me most interested in this programme.

I would have given it five stars but I’m a bit iffy on the idea of secure responses to questions such as “will you love me forever?” I understand where Tatkin is coming from but the realist in me finds it hard to wholeheartedly agree with the idea that we should respond with a reso
Veronica Romero
Jan 20, 2020 rated it really liked it
I originally chose this book to help define and explore my own intimacy patterns and needs. However, this book made me more aware and conscious of my parenting and the intimacy patterns I am instilling in my own children; which was my biggest takeaway from this book. Although, I don't completely agree with the specific categorization of the personality patterns and dynamics described, I did enjoy this book for making me more aware of the neurobiological factors at work as I form relationships an ...more
Shannon Cattley
Aug 14, 2018 rated it really liked it
Very interesting look at behaviours, neurology within the context of love and attachment- and a personal therapy session thrown in.

COULD give you the tools to have a wonderful life, excellent advice to put into use straight away for yourself and relationships. Probably won't help much if you are in a one sided situation though, unfortunately.
Katie Gassmann
Sep 06, 2018 rated it really liked it
Difficult to get through the first 3/4 of the book, so I was planning on just giving it three stars because it did have good information, but the last 1/4 of the book really tied everything together and gave seriously tangible information that I feel I can apply to my real every day relationships. Happy I stuck it out!
Mar 17, 2021 rated it liked it
Shelves: health-is-wealth
More scientific, less pop-psych (thank god) than I expected. Overall, this is less of a meditation on and more of an analysis of connection. All in all, the scientific POV helps take what is an oft romanticized (of course) subject and approaches it with an accessibility that could be celebrated by realists and hopeless romantics alike.
Apr 08, 2019 rated it it was ok
I found this one a bit confusing overall - it had lots of great things in it, but so many different names for things that I found hard to keep track of. I think I would have liked it better in print form rather than audiobook
Laura Arabie
Oct 22, 2020 rated it really liked it
Great book about how our individual attachment styles affect our primary love relationships, and ways to work within those for a happy, healthy relationship. I got a lot out of this & hope to read it again someday when it is more relevant to my life.
Sandy Singh
Jan 24, 2021 rated it really liked it
Good read for all couples! Highly suggest listening/reading together. Some things that stood out to me:
- You’re only as great as your partner thinks you are
- You and your partner are the king and queen of your kingdom
- How do you see yourselves in 20, 30, 40 years
Jan 23, 2018 rated it really liked it
This is a really interesting non fiction book about relationships. I learned a lot about what type of person I am.
Jun 25, 2018 rated it really liked it
Neurobiology of love is fascinating, although mostly the book is about attachment theory and how that can be applied to improve our primary relationships.
Jul 28, 2018 rated it really liked it
Shelves: nonfiction
Great to re-engage with Tatkin's work (I read Wired for Love several years ago). Many solid, actionable recommendations. ...more
May 26, 2019 rated it it was amazing
Shelves: 2018, 2019
A must read for all who are on a lookout for a long-term committed and happy relationship.
Oct 14, 2019 rated it it was amazing
Ground breaking. Earth shattering. Change how you do relationships for the better.
Elizabeth Drake
Mar 02, 2020 rated it it was amazing
Shelves: relationships
Useful book for understanding your and your partners attachment needs, triggers, and how to create a secure functioning relationship. Practical tips to implement right away.
Hadeel Elbitar
Aug 26, 2020 rated it it was amazing
Shelves: books-i-have
should be taught at schools! so so good! Mandatory reading for anyone who is or wants to be in a long term relationship of any kind!
Stacia Zabadal
Nov 12, 2020 rated it it was amazing
Excellent, highly recommended. One of the top relationship books to understand ourselves and our partners better.
Chloe Czabaranek, Esq.
Jan 15, 2021 rated it it was amazing
I liked the science/neurobiology of the book, and appreciated the attachment types of persons in partnerships. Overall an interesting read!
Feb 10, 2021 rated it it was amazing
Highly recommend for anyone in, or wanting to be in, a relationship.
Gabriela Dage
Feb 18, 2021 rated it it was amazing
This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers. To view it, click here.
Ehsan Gazar
Mar 18, 2021 rated it it was amazing
Great book, scientifically explained some points that I hadn't read before. ...more
Amber Breinholt
This book rocked my world and I loved it! I will be recommending this book to everyone for everything. So many new insights and validation to be found here!
Dec 21, 2019 rated it it was amazing
Listening to Stan talk about relationships helped me see his point of view with your partner. It gave me an overall view of how males perceive things than females. This book felt personal and I’m glad to call it one of my recommendations for any couples out there seeking therapy.
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Stan Tatkin, PsyD, MFT, is a clinician, teacher, and developer of A Psychobiological Approach to Couple Therapy® (PACT). He has a clinical practice in Calabasas, CA, where he has specialized for the last 15 years in working with couples and individuals who wish to be in relationships. He and his wife, Tracey Boldemann-Tatkin, developed the PACT Institute for the purpose of training other psychothe ...more

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