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The Problem is YOU: How to Get Out of Your Own Way and Conquer Self-Defeating Behavior
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The Problem is YOU: How to Get Out of Your Own Way and Conquer Self-Defeating Behavior

3.42  ·  Rating details ·  391 ratings  ·  45 reviews
74 pages
Published June 2012
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Average rating 3.42  · 
Rating details
 ·  391 ratings  ·  45 reviews


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Chelsea
Feb 23, 2013 rated it it was amazing
This book...probably turned my life around, in a good way. I was being told by my husband that i was such a negative person. And i would deny it, and say its just been a bad week, and continue to try and explain myself but always getting stuck and breaking down because i honestly didn't know what was my problem. I just happen to run over this title...its pretty blunt, and i like blunt. And it tollllld me. Fact is, that i was pretty damn nagtive, it kinda slapped me in the face when this whole bo ...more
Iryn
The Problem is YOU: How to Get Out of Your Own Way and Conquer Self-Defeating Behavior
This is a very handy and practical book. And surely I have learnt a lot. You know there are some things you know in your subconscious and which you find difficult to give a voice to because you think it is UNIQUELY YOU – when somebody else speaks about it – it sort of ‘jolts’ you out and if you really want, creates a way out or PIN YOU DOWN AND POINT OUT THE WAY! This is what I encountered in reading the book.
...more
Christina Mathers
Nov 08, 2012 rated it really liked it
Shelves: self-help
Let’s just face it, the truth hurts sometimes. Sometimes we fail and like to blame it on others, when we truly know it is our own fault. This book helps us overcome our self-defeating behavior. Have you ever felt that no matter what you did, nothing ever happens the way it was supposed to? How about every time you try to make a bad situation better, only to make it worse? Maybe you are not, but are you like me, where you try to make sure that everyone is happy? You do everything you can to make ...more
Shalyce
Sep 25, 2019 rated it liked it
This is a short but good quick reference guide for many of the things we do to make our lives unhappy. It touches on fixed mindset, victim mentality, co-dependency, self-sabatoge, addiction and more. It would be helpful for anyone unfamiliar with many of these concepts. It would probably be helpful to an individual to help you identify some areas where you falter that you could then explore more. The main premise--that the problem and the power lies within each individual is essential and I like ...more
Tamara
Sep 12, 2020 rated it liked it
Straight to the point advice on how to be better.
Gloria
Nov 16, 2019 rated it it was amazing
Short, blunt, and to the point insight about what is holding us back from reaching our full potential and how to break free from those self-constructed chains.

This book doesn't belabor each point. So, if you're the type who wants an elaborate, touchy-feely story for everything, there are self-help books aplenty for you out there.

This book is for someone who needs but also wants a swift kick and push out the door to reclaim themselves.

In other words, its reader is ready to hear advice like, "X a
...more
Norjak
Aug 26, 2019 rated it it was ok
Short/Quick read mostly about the need to be able to accurate self assessment (you may be getting in your own way), knowing what you can control vs. can't, knowing when/what portion is your fault -> focus on doing something toward goal instead of 'beating yourself up'.

You would be as well served by most good leadership books which will cover this aspect from a different angle plus more topics.
...more
Roxana
Oct 01, 2019 rated it liked it
A solid pep talk that lasted about an hour on audiobook. I didn't discover anything earth-shattering but the author made some interesting points that made me think. I wish there had been more actionable items, but I did appreciate the "real life examples" scattered throughout. ...more
Adam
Oct 31, 2019 rated it liked it
So basic in self-defeating behavior that it’s almost not worth listening to. If you don’t know anything about the subject this is a great place to start. Otherwise look for more in depth explanations for more growth.
Kelly
Jan 02, 2020 rated it did not like it
Never before have I read a self-help book so devoid of empathy, so lacking in depth and relatability. Boils down to hey, you are doing this wrong. It isn’t benefiting you, so decide to stop and stop. The end. I so don’t understand the positive reviews.
Bethany
Apr 27, 2020 rated it it was ok
Shelves: self-improvement
Nothing stood out to me as anything I hadn't already heard and I didn't feel motivated to actually change anything during/after reading. But it's always good to read a self-help book to do some introspective thinking and life-evaluating. ...more
Mindy
Jun 30, 2020 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
An excellent book, for anyone who is going through self- defeating behavior . I will definitely try the tips, John suggests. I've been wanting to improve my life for awhile.
If you've read "Change Your Brain, Change Your Life" by Daniel G. Amen, I highly recommend reading this book !
...more
Shruti
Aug 06, 2019 rated it really liked it
A quick but good read, it helped me recognize some self defeating believes I have and it was surprising to learn how ingrained those believes are.
Dorothy Pergola
Oct 14, 2019 rated it really liked it
I like a book that validates things for me while still throwing n an aha moment. This book did just that and in a quick read!
Erin
Oct 26, 2019 rated it it was ok
Pro: incredibly short
Con: said nothing that wasn’t cliche and provided no fresh perspectives
Tracy
Nov 18, 2019 rated it really liked it
Good advice
Amanda Crowe
Jan 02, 2020 rated it it was amazing
Very good if your willing to be honest with yourself
Traci D'antonio
Feb 11, 2020 rated it really liked it
Short but good
Jackie
Mar 14, 2020 rated it really liked it
This was a great little pep talk. Only runs an hour and has a lot of positive messages.
Kelly
Apr 13, 2020 rated it liked it
A quick reminder for me to stop being a victim and I am the one with the power for my happiness.
Katie
Apr 29, 2020 rated it liked it
This quick little read stood up and slapped me in the face.
M.
May 02, 2020 rated it it was amazing
It was a good read.
Dustin
May 12, 2020 rated it it was amazing
Awesome book! Self sabotage is real and this book helps avoiding it in every way. Short but wise!
Sylvie M.
May 14, 2020 rated it really liked it
A very short and to the point book. It reads as if conversing with a trusted friend. The psychology of the procrastinators mind is insightful.
Linda
May 28, 2020 rated it liked it
Good ideas but it seems that topics are not really covered in depth
Jennifer Mitchell-Shirley
Nov 23, 2019 rated it it was amazing
Short, direct, to the point. Very good read to reset your direction when you are feeling non-productive.
Satjit
May 19, 2020 rated it liked it
This book called me out
Stacie Wyatt
May 03, 2014 rated it it was amazing

I read the Problem is You by John Burke, in exchange for review from Library Thing. The book was part of a giveaway, in exchange for a review. The book was published by Empowerment Nation. The book was a quick read.

The book discusses how to conquer self-defeating behavior, which I have plenty of. I will talk my way out of some situations because I am afraid of the outcome. I also can rationalize and project with the best of them. When you feel like a failure, you do things that will not make yo
...more
Charlie
Feb 03, 2013 rated it it was ok
The Problem Is You written by John Burke is a self-help book about self-defeating behavior. It contained information that I found not only useful, it was very educating. It had a few tips and helpful steps on how to not be self-defeating. While it was very informative, it read like something a well educated student would turn in for a term paper. It was hard to stay focused because it was very clinical, it didn’t draw you in and make you say “Hey these are great tips”. It was more of a “I need t ...more
Ramplo
Nov 03, 2012 rated it liked it
Shelves: arc-review
Quick & Dirty:

-If I was basing my review solely on how the book is marketed, I'd give this book a 2 at best. HOWEVER if you ignore the title and view this as a reference book it'd deserve closer to a 4. I'm meeting half way and saying 3.

-Advice sections are very small and scattered for a self-help book.

-There is a lot of information provided about many facets of self-defeating behavior...Important to avoid "medical school syndrome" when reading it.

Long & Wordy:
To read more about what I thought o
...more
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For the British novelist and writer, see John Burke.
Christian Witer = John Burke
Trek President = John Burke
Burke's Peerage = John Burke
Educational Editor = John Burke
Boat Builder = John Burke
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