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The Chupacabra: A Borderline Crazy Tale of Coyotes, Cash & Cartels

3.34  ·  Rating details ·  133 ratings  ·  35 reviews
He is called El Barquero. He makes his trade along the border, smuggling guns and killing without remorse. As he faces his one last mission, his perfect plan is unwittingly foiled by Avery, a paranoid loner obsessed with global conspiracy theories who spends most of his time crafting absurd and threatening letters to anyone who offends him. That means pretty much everyone. ...more
Kindle Edition, 233 pages
Published August 19th 2012 by Knuckleball Press
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Showing 1-30
3.34  · 
Rating details
 ·  133 ratings  ·  35 reviews

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Feb 18, 2013 rated it it was amazing
Thomas Wolfe once said, "You Can't Go Home Again." Well, maybe he didn't SAY it, but he used it as the title of a book I haven't yet read.

It seems like good advice to me.

You can't go home again.

'Cos when you do, all sorts of weird shit happens.

Meet Kip. He's headed home to Austin to spend time with his dad, who's been diagnosed with cancer, and may not have much time left on this planet.

Meet Aunt Polly and her gang of bingo-obsessed lady friends. They'll keep you laughing as they take Tai Chi
ᴥ Irena ᴥ
Aug 22, 2013 rated it liked it
Shelves: humour
It took me a long time to finish this book and I don't have any real reason for it. It was just slow, so I won't rate it low because it really doesn't deserve a low rating just because I wasn't in the mood for it when I started reading.

There are a number of POVs and they all come together near the end of this crazy book. The characters best describe it. The author managed to tell a humorous (though dark) story even with serious themes: illegal aliens, remorseless assassins, drugs, cartels and
Just OK. I really wanted to like this one, but the characters were just too broad for me. I did enjoy the intertwined story lines, but would have probably preferred fewer with a more cohesive, more fully realized result.
Apr 14, 2013 rated it really liked it
I must give this book a great score and I can give two reasons for it: Avery and Pearl! I know you have no idea of what I am talking about, but we will get there, I promise.
First beware that this is no fantasy book nor Sci-Fi, it is an honest to God comedy book set in contemporary Texas. From the title I really did not know what to expect. The Chupacabra? I mean, I know what a chupacabra is and therefore I was kind of expecting a horror novel, indulging in gruesome details of terrifying blood-su
Oct 16, 2012 rated it really liked it
I received a copy of this book in exchange for an honest review. This was one of those books that I just had to read and I’m glad I did. I thoroughly enjoyed this book. It was a crazy ride with some of the quirkiest characters I’ve ever met. It was well written and kept me interested in the story the entire time, even when I wasn’t sure how a particular scene was relevant. The glimpses of the characters and the events surrounding them come together as the story progresses and adds to the chain ...more
Lynelle Clark
A really good read.
It was all that the author promised. Dark comedy expertly laced in a interesting plot which involved the drug cartel, murder and paranoid characters.
Adding a small dog with a superior complex and you find your self reading the book with a smile on your face. Chuckles and shaking the head for the stupidity of the characters a definite during the read.
The five old ladies colored it in with their quirky comments, insane driving and a general love for people. While the murderer
At 33 years of age, I can honestly say I have finally "met" my favorite literary character of all time. It's no exaggeration when I tell you I wouldn't be at all surprised if Avery Bartholomew Pendleton forever takes the cake (or sabotaged taco) in that department.

This is one of the most amazingly entertaining, laugh-out-loud funny, and adventurous books I've ever read. Full of quirky, outlandish characters that remain believable and likable, and a meaner than mean villain, this novel will keep
Eric Prater
Mar 29, 2018 rated it it was amazing

What the hell! This damn thing won't let me write Yeehaa! For a title, BS! I loved this book well written, hilarious, violent! Damon Good if I do say so.
Carol S. Harris
Jul 28, 2017 rated it really liked it

I thought the book would be a documentary but it was funny. Couldn't help but laugh at some of the characters. It is worth reading.
Jun 12, 2013 rated it really liked it
Shelves: the-g-series
Name of Book: The Chupacabra: A Borderline Crazy Tale of Coyotes, Cash & Cartels

Author: Stephen Randel

ISBN: 9780988222502

Publisher: Knuckleball Press

Part of a Series: The Chupacabra Misadventures

Type of book: 2000s, letters, conspiracies, action, suspense, comedy, Mexico, cartel, mafia, Texas, Chupacabras

Year it was published: 2012


He is called El Barquero. He makes his trade along the border, smuggling guns and killing without remorse. As he faces his one last mission, his perfect p
Oct 10, 2012 rated it really liked it
Shelves: read-in-2012
Stephen Randel's novel The Chupacabra is an adventurous comedy that illustrates Randel's impressive talent for storytelling as he weaves together an extensive cast of diverse characters that all intersect at the end. At first I was a little overwhelmed by the amount of characters I needed to get a grasp on to get immersed in this book, but it really didn't take long for the story to pull me under. The story is constantly changing between its ensemble cast member's perspectives, so it's important ...more
Oct 01, 2012 rated it really liked it
Orignially posted:

He is called El Barerquo. He makes his trade along the border, smuggling guns and killing without remorse. As he faces his one last mission, his perfect plan is unwittingly foiled by Avery, a paranoid loner obsessed with global conspiracy theories who spends most of his time crafting absurd and threatening letters to anyone who offends him. That means pretty much everyone.

What unfolds is a laugh out loud dark comedy of madcap a
Farzy Mae of BooksKeepMeSane
Jun 09, 2013 rated it really liked it
Shelves: read-in-2013

The Chupacabra doesn’t seem my cup of tea. At first I was really hesitant to read it. Before reading the book, I knew what a chupacabra is– a mythical creature that are said to inhabit Mexico and kill people but when they do not drink the blood of human, they prey on goats instead. Upon hearing the title I immediately thought it was of the paranormal genre, and then I found out the genre of the book is humor. I told myself I will give it a try.

I’m gl
Liz Terek
Oct 12, 2012 rated it it was amazing
Border troubles are nothing new nowadays. Nightly newscasts are often filled with stories of drugs & murder along the US/Mexican border. With no regard for human life, intricate networks operate on both sides. Mayhem abounds as humans & contraband is smuggled towards ‘The American Dream’.
Stephen Randel’s tale of border woes brings us an eclectic mix of characters. First up is El Barquero or ‘The Ferryman’. Ruthless to his muscled core, he plays cartels against each other in a bloody que
Kathy LaMee
Mar 23, 2013 rated it it was amazing
This is a CRAZY fun read! It’s a wacky tale of a really strange man-boy who is just crazy enough to get caught up in a whole mess of drug cartels and crazy home-grown militia wannabes in the epic hunt for the invasive vampire dog- the Chupacabra. It is one of the most crack-pot books I’ve ever read. At the end, I just looked at it and thought, “Ya, this TOTALLY could happen!” I absolutely loved it! (Yes, I know, I’m using a ton of exclamation points; but well, I’m excited!)
When I first started t
Apr 23, 2013 rated it liked it
This was fun read with a cast of characters rivaling Evanovich’s Plum series. We find a young man coming back to his West Texas hometown after working in NY City to find his father in poor health, a step brother who spends his time closeted in his room dreaming up schemes and inventions and writing letters to company CEO’s to complain about this and that. His Aunt Polly and her crew of senior citizens including Pearl, a small black woman toting a huge pistol. Then there is General X-Ray, the hea ...more
Sep 10, 2012 rated it it was amazing
What starts out as seemingly separate stories coalesce and collide into one laugh out loud roller-coaster ride! I was in stitches reading ‘The Chupacabra’! From oddball Avery’s letters to various corporations (which I had to read out loud to my other half because they were so funny) to the sinister El Barquero’s activities under the cartel’s noses, there wasn’t a point in this book where I was bored. You absolutely do have to read this book to believe it – the description alone doesn’t give it j ...more
David Burke
Jan 24, 2014 rated it really liked it
The Chupacabra: A Borderline Crazy Tale of Coyotes, Cash and Cartels is every bit as crazy as the title implies. I had a great time with this story and recommend it. It's part satire / parody and part oh-so-real current events. It's both brutally funny and brutally violent.

As I live in the region where it takes place (the border between Mexico and the US) and hear of these kinds of situations on a daily basis, it was refreshing to see it all from a lighter point of view - as dangerous as they ar
Denise L Jenne
Oct 26, 2013 rated it liked it
The story of El Barquero, the drug smuggling trade and the US Border Patrol was riveting. However, I didn't particularly relish the scenes with the civilian militia, whose members are shown as fumbling fools a la F Troop. Yes, I could see how those scenes could be humorous, but I find it discomforting that such a group is represented as harmless and comedic and nothing about which to be concerned. Civilian militia border patrols can be dangerous and, if they are made up of fumbling fools, they p ...more
Mark Nawrocki
May 02, 2013 rated it really liked it
Great characters albeit hardly a sane one among them. The author somehow entwines a menacing assassin, five aging but hilarious Texas ladies (think older versions of Bridesmaids), a ruthless Mexican cartel leader, a band of nut job Texas border militia, a conspiracy-driven overweight computer nerd, a burnout hippy bookstore/head shop owner and the protagonist and his dad into a fast-paced yarn that perfectly blends elements of humor and suspense.

Randel's first novel is a winner - can't wait for
Ben Arzate
Sep 07, 2012 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: books-i-own
Stephen Randel's debut novel is a story about El Barquero. A gunrunner and hit man for a Mexican drug cartel, "The Ferryman" has decided to go rogue and take the cartel's shipments for himself. He plans to pull off just one more heist, but during this job things go awry.

No, that's not what this book is about...

Full Review:
Tanya Avines
May 03, 2016 rated it really liked it
A hysterical hoot! Loved Avery and Pearl ❤
Great book full of a lively, quirky bunch of characters. Some blood and gore ... Okay, lots of blood and a bit more than just "some" gore. But it's all relative to the storyline! Lol
Oh and what a story! Fast paced, true to life, kind of, and fun. A truly fun book.
I loved this book ... I laughed out loud. As for laughing it's up there with "Blabbermouth", high praise indeed.
Aug 29, 2013 rated it did not like it
Shelves: fiction
This story should have been funnier or darker, but it missed the mark of a dark comedy. The characters are cartoonish and not believable. This apparently works for some, but I couldn't care about any of the characters. I felt like I was reading a knock- off of "No Country for Old Men". It ends in cliff-hanger but I won't know what happens in the next 2 books in the series.
Aug 11, 2015 rated it did not like it
Shelves: dnf
I started reading not knowing anything about the theme. It started out with the drug runners and El Baquero waiting for them. I liked Kip and Avery and laughed out loud at the taco stand exchange BUT then the sudden change of action back and forth turned me off. I just lost interest. It got some good reviews so I'm sure it's me. I may give it another try later.
Barbara Rauch
Aug 08, 2013 rated it really liked it
Shades of Carl Haissan in a Texas border setting ! This book will keep you laughing the whole way through. From the Mexican drug cartel hitman to a truly inept posse comitas, and from the ladies bingo circle to an incredibly strange conspiracy theorist with a bent for correspondence, this book is a great read ! The legendary chupacabra also makes an appearance. I can't wait to read the next one !
Apr 28, 2014 rated it really liked it
This was a fun read. It is not classic literature but just a nonsense filled book of misadventure. You will not need your dictionary for this one, but you may be on Google looking for the title beast.
Valerity (Val)
Feb 02, 2014 rated it really liked it
A crazy story about getting caught up in drug running for the cartel and trying to get out.
Sep 30, 2013 rated it really liked it
Great book!
Jul 17, 2013 rated it did not like it
Wasn't impressed by this book in the least. Seemed to be random stories forced together for no reason.
Jun 17, 2016 rated it liked it
Shelves: free
A fun vacation read
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