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Bitten (Bitten #1)

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3.45  ·  Rating details ·  2,522 Ratings  ·  198 Reviews
When Ally becomes a newly single woman, she is determined to meet the man of her dreams. Never truly expecting it to actually occur, she is amaze to find herself drawn to a dark, mysterious stranger leaning against the bar. He was utterly irresistible.

Despite her friends’ protests, she willingly follows him outside the bar and soon realizes that her world will never be the

...more
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Published May 20th 2011 by Smashwords
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Shurrn
I could have been something special. With a good editor, I'd say this could be a great jumping point for a novel. However, it falls short in its current form.
Terree
Jul 13, 2011 rated it did not like it
It was just ok until the end, then it was awful. It really wasn't a novela, it is like an ongoing series... that stops in the middle of a thought. It was NOT a good ending. and then at the end the author says if readers want a second book go to her blogspot and motivate her...WHAT???? It was worth what I paid on nook... 0.00 If there was a little closure, I wouldn't have had a problem, but don't leave us in basically the middle of a sentence and say... hmmm, I'm not sure if I'll finish this sent ...more
Krissy Zibell
Oct 31, 2012 rated it did not like it
This is one of the worst books I've read in a while. I was optimistic b/c the first few pages sortof pull you in. Plus it was free on my Nook, so why not try it. The book is short; and that's probably the only reason why I finished it. The first almost half of this book is about Ally being dumped, going to a Halloween party to meet her friends, her getting ready for said Halloween party, and her meeting this mysterious man. The rest of the book is so fast paced that you lose the story line and ...more
Mel Auslan Osborne
This story is a Halloween story about Ally........ she has recently broken up with her boyfriend so decides to go all out for Halloween....... She dresses as a Vampire (of cause she does) and goes clubbing to meet 2 girl friends.

Once at the club she meets a handsome man (who of cause is a real vampire) come on tell me you didn't see that coming..... obvious hey.

Anyway Ally feels a pull towards Benedict, yet notices other women just feel uncomfortable, including her friends...... does she go wit
...more
Goge (BARRONS) le Moning Maniac,
Halfway:

I'm finding this hard to read it's just.. so.. DELETED DELETED DELETED DELETED.. un-unique. DELETED. Ordinary. Trying too hard.

Three minutes later (I'm not kidding):

It's 'sad'. Immaturely sad and discardable... Giving me a headache. DELETED.. Ughhn now I feel guilty for giving a bad review:/

Minutes later:

Skimming Skimmmming to the end. Cuz this is deplorable. Deplorable. It was such a dissatisfying, deplorable read that the word "deplorable" popped up in my head and tagged itself to s
...more
ABookFiend
Nov 12, 2011 rated it it was ok
Shelves: paranormal
I read this book thinking I was getting the first in a series entitled, "Bitten;" however, it is not Book One (as advertised) but more of an intro to the series or a couple of chapters to a full length story. A straight forward description would help since it left me feeling cheated with the hurried pace and forced ending.

This story started off with great promise as we are introduced to Ally, a confident young woman (25) who is looking forward to celebrating Halloween as a newly single girl. She
...more
Emily Genest
Sep 18, 2012 rated it did not like it
I am all for self-published books. I think it is great that authors have the opportunity to put there work out there without the rigmarole of the current publishing world. HOWEVER it's really important that these self-published authors find themselves a good proofreader and/or editor. I got 6 pages into this book before I couldn't take it anymore. Holy incomplete sentences Batman! I'm not a huge stickler for grammar. I know that my grammar isn't always as good as it should be-- I misuse commas a ...more
Cynthia
Mar 23, 2012 rated it did not like it
I needed to read this with an editing pencil in hand. The grammar is unbearably dreadful. Past and present tense are often used in the same phrasing. I erased the book from my Kindle quickly, but an example would be similar to "She walk to the store and eat a bagel." The plot was cute, but this is not a "novel." There is no completion to the plot. It is simply the beginning chapters of a book.
Voirey Linger
Oct 21, 2011 rated it liked it
Cute little story and better than the average self-pub, enjoyable little free read. There were a few grammar issues which threw me out of the story. Relies on the fates mate trope, and I have a bit of trouble with any story that goes from just met to lifetime commitment overnight.
Melanie Wells
Aug 03, 2011 rated it really liked it
This book was very good. I couldn't wait to read each chapter!
I'm so happy the "Sequel" is out! Pretty good read for a free book!!!!
Mia
Aug 30, 2012 rated it it was amazing
I love this series!! So suspenseful! Can't wait to read Unbroken

Merged review:

I love this book!! Can't wait to read the next ones!
Georgia
Jun 28, 2015 rated it did not like it
Wow what a tasteless, terribly written story with no plot twists or exciting plot developments. Well it's another vampire story - well I think it is towards the end? This is a very poorly written story. It wasn't tedious, it was just terribly flat, and missing a lot of flair. And a book needs its flair.

It's really difficult to write a short story. Firstly, it has to be short, but really detailed and entertaining. The author has to create characters that will make the reader empathise with them,
...more
Amanda
Mar 13, 2013 rated it it was ok
Quick 100 page read. Typical vampire story. Girl sees vampire. Vampire sees girl. Fated eternal love story. Bite to transform. Struggle of some sort. Then a plug for book 2 to be read.
Sadly there was so little story development and no surprise twists so I think I'll leave Book 2 unread.
kelly west
Sep 17, 2016 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
What fun!

Good story line with unexpected turns. A good read. A love story that gets right to the meat quickly and smoothly, without the sappy whine and drama.
Michelle
Oct 20, 2011 rated it really liked it
Shelves: own
Great, fast read. Kept you interested & good storyline. On to book #2....
Jamie Griffith
Jan 17, 2013 rated it did not like it
This reads like a very badly written fanfiction story. Don't waste your time!
Lisa
Apr 03, 2018 rated it it was ok
A bit disappointed. Well written but not as good a read as I hoped it would be.
Frances
Jun 04, 2017 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
A good short story

I really like this short story. I am excited to read the second book. Hopefully it will not let me down.😁
Jen
Dec 14, 2011 rated it liked it
Shelves: x-read-in-2011
Cute story - it was short and sweet - I haven't read many vampire books lately so it was a nice change of pace for me.

The story is mainly about Ally going to a club for Halloween with her friends ( I love club scenes)
She accidently bumps into someone, he steadies her and walks off - but there was something about him that caught her eye.

When Ally asked her friends about him, they told her there was something "off" by him, she should stay away.. but Ally kept catching his eyes on her and she ca
...more
MsBDiamondDiva1
Feb 23, 2012 rated it liked it
Benedict has been putting off his marriage to Moria for awhile and figured he would never have to be forced into it. Once he signs the contact that seals his faith, he soon regrets the decision; because now his only outage will be if he finds his true mate. Benedict heads out on Halloween for a night on the town, but soon finds that he will be getting more that the usually treats this night. He meets Ally (his true mate) and things turn upward for him, but soon Ally is kidnapped and Benedict is ...more
H
May 11, 2013 rated it it was ok  ·  review of another edition
If someone had simply lent me this book and not told me where it came from I would've assumed it was a 12 year old girl who was obsessed with vampires writing on a fan fiction site. This book was pretty horrible. There were spelling and grammar mistakes everywhere, which for a published book is sickening. Simple errors that should've been caught if the author had simple proofread their book. Ally is a very poor main character. She has no admirable traits. She's stupid and it makes this book very ...more
Jenny Delandro
Nov 14, 2012 rated it really liked it
A contemporary vampire story..
Benedict is looking for his mate.. humans normally shun him but he notices a human girl watching him.

Ally saw him walk in and she feels completed captivated..he is handsome and she gets up the courage to go and talk to him . .
(view spoiler)
...more
Marisa Oldham
Apr 19, 2013 rated it it was ok
I was totally into this book, then BAM it was over. I kept thinking that perhaps I didn't download it correctly, but soon I discovered that I wasn't the only one confused.
It is hard to write novels...first of all you're putting a lot of yourself out there and it makes you feel vulnerable so first I give the author credit for trying. 1* for that
The story was really interesting until the last section. It went way too fast! I'm all for a cliffhanger, but I think first the author should make sure th
...more
Jenny
Mar 18, 2012 rated it it was ok
First off this is in no way a novel. It's almost just a teaser to an actual novel. I was pretty disappointed in the characters in general because with so few pages in the "novel" I didn't begin to get a feel for any of the characters. After reading the whole story I still don't have a feel for the main characters Alli or Benedict. The author's fresh take on the vampire/human relationships and the vampire society has so much potential to be the makings of a great series, but the lack of character ...more
Michelle Randall
I have a nook app on my new phone and was searching the Barnes and Noble site for free nook books and saw this listed.

It is quite short and ends in a huge cliffhanger, which I didn't like because it keeps you hanging until the second book finally gets published.

Aside from that it was a good book and did entice me and I do want to read the next book. It's just another vampire story but it is nothing like the twilight vampires, a little more real life and down to earth.

It was well written and a q
...more
Jess Kittelson
Feb 06, 2012 rated it liked it
Bitten was a free story I picked up from Barnes and Nobles for my nook. I felt at first this was a story intended for young adults the way it was written until it reached the sex sceen! Which made it ovious it wasn't intended for minors. Don't get me wrong tho I read tons of young adult books and love stories with vampires and other fantasy creatures. As with most short stories I feel the story just moved too fast and ended well, it didn't really end it left me hanging in limbo with many questio ...more
Lana
Oct 29, 2014 rated it really liked it
The story line was good enough to keep me reading further. The writer put her words across very effectively so it was a very easy read. Not much in the way of action, more the slow build up as you get further into the plot.

Take a single woman, throw in Halloween and a party, add the mix of a hot sexy vampire and you can let your imagination continue with the story.

I did however find that the story was a little too short for my personal liking. Just when it seems it is building up, along comes th
...more
Cathy
Sep 25, 2011 rated it it was ok
Shelves: kindle-books
Novella. Got it free for Kindle.
Ally just broke up with her boyfriend so she's planning to go all out for the Halloween party. Dressed as a sexy vampire Ally sees a very hot guy and falls instantly into lust. Her girlfriends say he's creepy; the female bartender hardly wants to serve him. What is going on?
When he leaves the bar Ally follows him to another private club. She's totally smitten after she talks with him a bit.
Benedict is a vampire who has been searching for his human soulmate - desp
...more
Dee
May 10, 2012 rated it it was amazing
Shelves: short-stories
Ally is a really great lead character knowing just what she wants until she arrived at the Flambe'. Until that moment when she bumped into Mr sexy vampire she thought that she was looking for a good time at this Halloween party tonight and on with her life. Her friends Pam and Trish told her to back off this was a bad news bear for her.

Well when was the last time you did just what your friends told you to do. How was she to ever have any fun and he looked so lusious, if she did that? If your loo
...more
Mary Ellen Fink
Oct 23, 2012 rated it liked it
This book was okay, the storyline was good but rushed. It's only like 105 pages but they did make a second book to follow up. I feel they could have lengthen the book just a bit. I mean it was Ally meant Ben she followed him from a club to a bar then they went to his place he said she was his mate they did it then it was like they were "Married" vampire style. I mean really spread it out just a little. I'm still going to read the second book to see what happens, like I said the storyline is good ...more
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Goodreads Librari...: Wrong info? 6 38 May 06, 2014 01:29AM  
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238 followers
Merrill Gemus is a Canadian author who creates short stories, novels, and mini-series in her spare time.

She started blogging in January 2009 and found an interest in creating stories. She published her first novella, Bitten, in May 2011, and later published its sequel, Stolen, in August 2011.

Merrill took a small break from writing between 2012 and 2017. During this time, she married her best frien
...more

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“You, as a human, should have never been attracted to me, let alone follow me. But, you did and I knew that I had finally found you.” He paused and smiled warmly at Ally. “I am a pure-blooded vampire. These fangs are real and I wish of you to be my mate.” 0 likes
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