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Living Nonviolent Communication: Practical Tools to Connect and Communicate Skillfully in Every Situation
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Living Nonviolent Communication: Practical Tools to Connect and Communicate Skillfully in Every Situation

4.3  ·  Rating details ·  337 Ratings  ·  35 Reviews
You're about to have an uncomfortable meeting with your boss. The principal just called about your middle-schooler. You had a fight with your partner and it's an hour before bed. You know your next move will go a long way toward defining your relationships with these individuals. So what do you do?
We all find ourselves in situations similar to these, and too often resort
Paperback, 170 pages
Published June 1st 2012 by Sounds True (first published 2012)
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Aug 15, 2013 rated it it was amazing
It's a difficult read (for me - because it's not a story) but well worth the time. I needed help speaking with both my son and students in a way that respects and empathizes with their own "stuff" instead of taking things personally. Honestly, I'm just sick of being defensive all the time. I don't have enough practice yet, but I plan to attend some seminars and read all his other books. A world without war. holla.
Oct 12, 2015 rated it really liked it
Like Rosenberg's main book, this introduces life-changing theories for how to think and speak. A sequel of sorts to the original, it uses case studies, dialogue to help unpack and explain the value of non-violent communication. I found myself wishing I had obtained the foundation first, which I subsequently did by reading the original.
Dec 24, 2016 rated it really liked it
Shelves: self-improvement
'Living Nonviolent Communication' brought me a greater perspective on our basic feelings and how to communicate them well. B. Rosenberg explains that we all have different human needs (such as integrity, intimacy, security..) and when we communicate through these needs, we can clear away any communication blockages, end conflicts and fulfill our human needs to greater happiness and wellbeing. Communicating through our basic human needs and without judgments, manipulation, violence or suppression ...more
Jan 28, 2017 rated it it was amazing
“Don’t mix up that which is habitual with that which is natural.”- Gandhi

Read it. Take notes.

Before reading this book I suggest you read Nonviolent Communication: A Language of Life, a book about foundations of NVC, and then come back to read this more practical companion.

Here you'll get stories from Rosenberg's workshops, role-playing dialogues and stories from his personal life. He really breaks it down into simple steps and shows how much relief and joy people find when they connect with ea
Feb 26, 2016 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
There is a chapter on anger, which is the most helpful piece on the topic that I've read (and I've sought out so much advice and literature in both psychology and spirtiuality on the topic because I struggle with it so much). Anger starts as a thought, in the form of a judgment of either yourself or someone else. If you can shift focus to either your feelings and needs or the other person's feelings and needs, the anger gets cut off. It sounds simple but is difficult to do, but this so far has b ...more
Emily Roach
Jun 05, 2017 rated it it was amazing
I very much think that the world would be a better place if everyone learned about NVC. Not in the same way that I think it would be a better place if everyone tried chai tea, but like, in an actual way. I want to hold this book like a dear baby.

The tenants of NVC are genius but SO SIMPLE. This book contains tons of examples and situational role-playing so that you can see how it really works in real life, which is very helpful. There are tons of clips from Marshall's seminars on YouTube and th
Mar 14, 2013 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Relatively quick read. Good in addition to the other works. Especially enjoyed the last chapter on "practical spirituality" and this quote:

pg 145 "I trust a spirituality that leads people to go forward and transform the world, that doesn't just sit there with this beautiful image of radiating energy. I want to see that energy reflected in people's actions as they go out and make things happen. It's something you do, a practical spirituality."
Dec 30, 2016 rated it really liked it
I've learned a lot and reflected on my own relationships, communication, and conflicts thanks to this book. I'm not a big fan of the dialog / transcript format though. A motivating read, I see the real value of the book is finding time to practice in our lives. the potential of healing with empathy leaves me optimistic, but also more aware of the omnipresence of suffering in how we've been socialized.
May 19, 2013 rated it really liked it
Filled with dialogues and helpful examples of the principles of Nonviolent Communication in action, this book makes those principles easier to understand and practice for those of us who do best with stories for learning (for each dialogue becomes a story). Great for small group study.
Mar 19, 2015 rated it it was amazing
Brilliant,and so very very important. A copy of this book would be an incredibly valuable to everyone-who struggles with communication issues-particularly those folks who think that OTHER people are the ones with the issues.
Rob Espinosa
May 29, 2017 rated it it was amazing
Rosenberg left a legacy of non-violent communication and the importance of using empathy to connect with others. He presents the ability of have power with others rather than over others. He explains how to effectively make an observation, state one's feeling and needs, and make a request in order to get our needs met, while meeting the needs of others. This book is for anyone who is trying to resolve conflict with others, or just becoming more self-aware of one's own needs and feelings.
Adrianne Reyes
Jan 17, 2018 rated it it was amazing
This book profoundly changed my life and my perspective. A lot of what he explains in this book were ideas and thoughts that I already had about how violent communication has become. I really believe that everyone should be required to read this to communicate more effectively and to resolve conflicts for the best of everyone involved.
Sep 10, 2017 rated it it was ok
Okay book. He gives a lot of examples from sessions he's led in prisons, marriage counselling etc. Basically Rosenberg believes we're not great at communicating our "needs" as opposed to our strategies. We need to practice hearing what people actually mean and use positive present language with one another.
Aug 22, 2017 rated it it was amazing
Life-changer. Wanted to write down almost every line....
I have a really hard time with the script/dialogue format of these books so far. However! Extra star for this: "That is what NVC is all about: What can we do to enrich one another’s lives? We tell them (1) what they’ve done to enrich us, (2) what our feelings are, and (3) what needs of ours have been fulfilled by their actions. I believe that, as human beings, there are only two things that we are basically saying: please and thank you." See also: the parenting section. (Loved the captain for da ...more
Navy heart HamlinNBCT
Sep 04, 2016 rated it it was amazing
Shelves: owned
Rosenberg's text is not only a spiritual advisor but a common sense reference guide . Keep Basic Feelings Hidden? -Do you see them as "touch stone red zones" ? The way to personalize flagged warning signs is through acceptance-They are ok, in fact most helpful in shaping how we communicate and rethinking how we have been taught to communicate. -More over recognition leads to knowing when learned behavior might be a stumbling block -Deep within are signs that some needs are not fulfilled- We migh ...more
Steffan Bard
Jun 10, 2015 rated it really liked it
Of the two books I prefer the first one but I enjoyed reading this one because there is so much to take in and rewire in your thinking to be able to live out NVC.

For me, reading this had more to do with me being aware of the objections that would come into my mind when a certain concept of NVC was being revisited. I still feel like I have a long way to go before I can live out NVC as much as I want to.

There was a lot of repeated material, mostly illustrations, from the regular NVC book, so I did
Callie Atkinson
May 29, 2015 rated it liked it
TW: Domestic Violence, R*pe

This book was one of the recommended readings from "More than Two". It certainly has helped me look at situations in a different way, trying to read the need behind people's expressions - in Marshall's words, "judgments are tragic expressions of unmet needs". I especially liked the section on managing anger, which went through identifying the stimulus and the cause and recognising they are separate from one another. I've learnt not to say "I'm angry because you.." but
Oct 15, 2014 rated it really liked it
Shelves: clinical, psychology
The nonviolent approach is very practical in terms of being relatively straightforward to introduce to others. However, implementing it in one's life can be challenging because to do so requires a person not to be hijacked by their fear/anger circuitry, and to be genuinely interested in achieving mutual understanding. So often, people have strategic / power agendas OTHER THAN coming to mutual understanding with another human being.
Sep 07, 2014 rated it liked it
Shelves: 2014, non-fiction
I don't remember why this author was recommended, but it was the author, and I picked the book title that sounded most useful. I didn't realize that this was a supplemental volume until about 3/4 of the way through; I was pretty frustrated that he wasn't explaining concepts and thought he was a pretty terrible communicator.

I will read the other book; I feel like there could have been great info here but out of order it wasn't very useful. Doh.
Aug 14, 2012 rated it it was ok
The premise is good but the dialogues read as made-up and hokey just to prove the point being delivered. Maybe this is a book for people who've never ever read a single self-help book, but I found it incredibly simplistic. Consider The Four Agreements instead. A much shorter and to-the-point book without all the pseudo-pithy dialogue.
May 14, 2016 rated it it was amazing
this book is invaluable. the best gift you can give to yourself (and to the world, really) is to read this book. no joke. please do it.

incredible insight as to why communicating is often difficult when we so desperately feel it needn't be, and how to ease some of the barriers that hinder us from more fully connecting with others.
May 05, 2016 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Great book

I have taken a lot of good from this book. I don't know that I can apply it to the personality type of INTJ, which is prominent in my life. Applying it to my own life and outside relationships will take practice but I am certainly going to try. I love the concept!
Mark Brown
May 14, 2014 rated it liked it
A very good follow on book to his main book, Nonviolent Communications. This is a challenging practice so this provides good scenarios.
The new CEO of Microsoft highly recommends NVC so we'll what difference it might make there.
May 12, 2015 rated it it was ok
There was only one chapter in this book that didn't tick me off, and that was the one about kids. I learned halfway through that is it a companion book, so I will go to the source material before judging too harshly.
Sean Conner
Jun 26, 2014 rated it it was amazing
It revolutionized the way I communicate with my wife, friends, and myself.
Steevn Toerist
Nov 15, 2015 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
De mensenfluisteraar :-)
Inderdaad een prachtig doe-boek, een manier van denken-communiceren die de meeste mensen niet gewoon zijn te doen. Een absolute aanrader!!
Emilis Kuke
Aug 03, 2015 rated it it was amazing
Jul 25, 2013 rated it really liked it
Loved this. Takes my positive discipline communication strategies to a deeper level.
Martin Van Wettum
Jun 17, 2015 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Mooi boek, inspirerend, goede handvatten om dmv verandering in je taalgebruik tot diepere communicatie te komen
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Marshall Rosenberg was an American psychologist and the creator of Nonviolent Communication, a communication process that helps people to exchange the information necessary to resolve conflicts and differences peacefully. He was the founder and Director of Educational Services for the Center for Nonviolent Communication, an international non-profit organization.

In 1961, Rosenberg received his Ph.D
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“Don’t mix up that which is habitual with that which is natural.” 6 likes
“This objective of getting what we want from other people—or getting them to do what we want them to do—threatens the autonomy of people, their right to choose what they want to do. And whenever people feel that they’re not free to choose what they want to do, they are likely to resist, even if they see the purpose in what we are asking and would ordinarily want to do it.” 1 likes
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