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248 pages, ebook
First published July 24, 2012
She rubbed the bald half of her head. “In China we say, ‘The girl with the full hair is not as free as the girl with the bare head.’"WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK? THIS. IS. NOT. TRUE!!!!!!
“It means that as long as I still shave my hair, I’m free. See, in China, girls keep their heads bald like the boys, yeah? Then when we’re the age to become a woman, we bind our feet and grow out our hair.
I shrank back, fighting the urge to run past her through the open door. “Th-the walking corpses,” I stammered. “The ones people have been talking about. One came to the train depot, so everyone was evacuated.”Oh, yes, such danger. Such excitement. The dead are rising. The dead are going to eat us alive. Yippee. Oh, save us, our Lord in Heaven.
“And what of our party tonight?” Mama insisted. “What am I to do?”
“We could cancel,” I said hopefully.
She snorted. “Of course we cannot cancel. The walking Dead must have addled your brain, Eleanor. This is our first party in years.
I raced through the now-empty main hall. My footsteps echoed off the marble tiles. The porters at the front doors exchanged shocked glances. I could imagine the sight I must have presented—a flushed ball of purple silk and rustling skirts. No matter. I whisked past them and flew out into the Philadelphia night.Eleanor, the Inconsistent: Eleanor is an well-born young woman. She doesn't act like it. Eleanor behaves as if she has a stick firmly wegded up her ass in one moment, and acts like a modern woman in the next.
“I... I need to use the necessary. Perhaps I can meet you in the Hydraulic Annex?”Aaaand yet again, to someone she hardly knows.
Clarence’s lips quirked up slightly. “Yes, all right. Use the water closet and then meet me in the annex.”
“I must go to the necessary,” I murmured to Clarence, but he didn’t budge.2. How Dare You Speak To Me Without a Very Proper Introduction: Eleanor's manners are all over the fucking place. In one moment, she's sneaking off to meet men. In a very private place. Actually, she does that repeatedly throughout the book. In another moment, she is shocked, SHOCKED, that he dares violate etiquette by SHAKING HER HAND! Oh, my pearls!
I turned to the squat Pinkerton. “I must go to the necessary.”
A gentleman simply was not supposed to shake the hand of an unmarried woman without a proper, third-party introduction. I was so used to chaperoned meetings that I had acted on foolish reflex.2. I Am A Lady, You Motherfucker: For a well-born lady, she sure curses a lot, and she's pretty free with her insults. She'll "be damned," this, he's a "bastard." Eleanor's speech may be archaic to fit the time, but she is completely inconsistent otherwise.
I took a weary breath, lifted my hands, and purred, “I’m truly sorry, sir.”What the fuck?! Since when did "purring" mean an actual purring sound when it comes to human voices? It is a figure of speech, for fuck's sakes. Yeah, I know I'm nitpicky. It's stupid little details like this that ruin a book for me.
He wrinkled his nose. “Why are you talking like that?”
“Like what?”
“Like you’re a kitten.
I had wasted time worrying over Daniel and Clarence, playing on the croquet course, and arguing with Mama. I had neglected what was most important: Elijah.Ugh.
Mama ignored me. “Your father did enough damage to our family’s standing, Eleanor, when he tried to save his company. Your brother only worsened it when he ran off. Without a good reputation, you will not make a suitable match. We will be on the streets soon!”The Romance: A love triangle and a romance that distracts Eleanor more than it should.
I opened my eyes and watched her. What an empty shell of a woman she was.
What was it about mouths that made them so fascinating? I had read of kisses (Shakespeare was fond of them in his plays), but I’d never seen one. And I’d certainly never experienced one. Did people merely touch lip to lip... or was there more to it?There are ZOMBIES. There is a necromancer at large. Stop thinking about his fucking lips.
Has Daniel ever kissed anyone?