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Vlad the Paler

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3.11  ·  Rating details ·  61 Ratings  ·  27 Reviews
When half-Korean sci fi-fantasy gamer nerd Cyrus Gae goes out clubbing on his first night of vacation, he’s not expecting to be bitten by a vampire. Not in Florida, the land of sunshine and Mickey Mouse. He’s not exactly averse to being a creature of the night, but he’s righteously pissed off about the vampire’s cavalier eat-and-run attitude. Determined to track down Troy, ...more
ebook, 215 pages
Published December 26th 2011 by Dreamspinner Press, LLC (first published December 25th 2011)
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Vio
Nov 29, 2011 rated it liked it
Shelves: unusual, odd
I really have no idea what to make of this story let alone how to review it lets just say it was quirky, crazy and different not what I was expecting!

Vlad with his friends in tow is seeking out the vampire who turned him, along the way he meets some interesting (freaky) characters. Vlad has a lot to deal with on this mission of revenge, expect the unexpected. Vamps, voodoo, goths, nerds, witches, a mad scientist and a very weird furball.

Vlad and Logan are cute and devoted to each other even th
...more
Sandra
This was a hilarious read.

Cyrus, a young man living on the Eastern Coast of South Florida, visits a nightclub and meets a guy who turns out to be a vampire. Who then bites and Turns him. These are not Stephenie Meyer's vamps though. No sparkling at all, unless you include the somewhat flamboyant nature of their dress code.

Anyway, newly Turned, Cyrus has not a clue what to do and how to act. He does know, however, that Cyrus is not a vampire name so for now, he goes with Vlad. As in Vlad Drakul,
...more
Absynthe
Very underrated book. But the plethora of cultural references probably put people off. I got almost all of them. Wonder what that says about me?

Funny, snarky and smart. I enjoyed this book since it had an original, interesting plot and a few original concepts.

This book should be rated higher.
Mandapanda
I'm not really sure how to rate this book. It took about 25% before I really started to like it. Vlad's a 21 year old gamer nerd who was bitten by a vampire outside a night club then left to die in the alley. When he wakes up, now a vampire, he is determined to get revenge on his 'sire'. Along the way he meets some old friends, makes some new ones and falls in love.

To start with I was thinking I was too old for this novel. There's a lot of references to RP (roleplay), gaming and cons, as well as
...more
VampireRomanceBooks ThatsErotica
I have to admit--when I first read the title of this book, I rolled my eyes and while I decided to go ahead and read it, I wasn’t sure what to expect. I’m so glad I didn’t judge too quickly and gave Vlad the Paler a chance. I laughed more while reading the book than I have in a long time. The main character, Vlad (aka Cyrus Gae, pre-vampire) was turned against his will. He’s okay with being a vampire; he is not okay with the way it happened. He’s determined to find Troy, the “suck head”, who tur ...more
Andrea
I love snarky one-liners in books, but this was too much. Having one every other sentence got boring quickly and there wasn't enough story to keep my interest. I gave up at page 33.
Cheryl
Jun 18, 2012 rated it it was ok  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: vamps
When I saw this book was written from the first-person-snark perspective, I was kind of hoping it would be like funny and sweet like American Love Songs. And it was... OK. Some parts were funny and some were sweet but overall, I had to force myself to keep reading it. I liked that it was very Florida... I could relate to that easily. As a story... the first third of it dragged and part of that was that the story didn't pick up until Vlad stopped hanging out with his minion, Vinnie. She was a mor ...more
Jenna Anderson
Jan 26, 2012 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: netgalley
Dude-Lit with Adult Content

And now for something completely different… When approaching this book you need to shake off all preconceived notions of a paranormal tale. Walk in with an open mind and be ready to laugh at this offering of juvenile humor.

I found Vlad the Paler an odd mix of clever writing, beautifully drawn characters, and snarky teen-speak. Oh and dashes of erotic, adult, MM scenes. Did I mention it was different. Yes. Yes it is.

Malthea (a female author) created an abundance of viv
...more
Bookwatcher
Dec 27, 2011 rated it it was amazing
Why I'm giving 5 stars?

1) I read it and never got bored. A lot happened, there are many characters and I loved them all! Each one is unique, and everyone will surprise the reader.

2) First person narration is always a big risk to writers. I read many, and I must admit if the narrator is annoying you can't go on, and will quit it. Well, it's not the case of this story! I laugh so many times! I'm not kidding, not just smile, I really laugh aloud. I must be honest and say it's not a perfect story (
...more
elyse
Vlad was just looking for a little bit of fun in the form of a makeout session in the back alley of a club. Unfortunately he met Troy, a vampire who turned him and left him behind a dumpster. Now Vlad is looking for Troy but first he needs some help. That help comes in the form of an old friend who becomes his "Girl Friday the 13th", a LOTR cosplayer who might just be his soulmate and a few others.

Overall it was a fun read. I liked Vlad, he was funny and his relationship with his "minions" was
...more
ManOhMan
Apr 24, 2012 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: reviewed
Reviewed by Ana: This book was definitely not what I expected. I thought it would be another serial book about vampires, but I was pleasantly surprised by the charming if somewhat quirky characters and the witty dialogue. The story follows the newly turned "Vlad" as he goes on his search for the vampire who turned him "Troy". What starts out as a quest for revenge turns somewhat into a journey of self discovery as Vlad re-connects with old friends and makes new ones along the way. All the charac ...more
Brannan Black
May 21, 2013 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
4.5 stars I'll assume you read the blurb so know what this book is about. It had me laughing at times and then gripping the edge of my seat to find out how it worked out. It has an unusual style that breaks many rules we authors are taught and yet, I couldn't put it down and find myself wanting more. Don't worry, the book wraps up nicely with a HEA; just saying I liked it so much, I would love to see more of these characters.
And now that I've tracked you down, Ms Malthea, I'll be checking out wo
...more
Paws
Dec 21, 2011 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Good snark, great asides and a vast array of sidekicks make this one of the more unique books I've read in a long time. (Bon Tom? Someone's been watching a lot of True Blood) Cyrus, aka Vlad constantly breaks the fourth wall to let you in on what's going on in the story, or just in his head. Low on the smut scale, but high on sarcasm. Give it a go! Just for fun!
;)
Sania
Mar 08, 2012 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Awwwwwww i loved this book Malthea's voice was so unique i can hear Vlad's voice in my head and everything he said either gave the giggles or the swoons. Witty humor enthralling characters and a lead that really does say what he thinks and thinks with the perfect blend of sarcasm and self-chastising
Sarah Black
Oct 05, 2013 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
If Black Jack Kerouac grew fangs and a sense of humor, he might have written this road warrior tale of a new vampire and his crew, trolling Florida for truelove and revenge. Funny and smart, really a delightful read.
Shay
Jan 11, 2012 rated it did not like it  ·  review of another edition
Couldn't finish it got stuck at 9%
Michael
Mar 18, 2016 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: humor_mm
3.5 Stars Rounded Up. Definitely deserves more than the 3.12 average it is currently rated.
t'irla ~The Bookslayer~ t'irla's Talk Book Blog
Feb 07, 2012 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Recommended to t'irla ~The Bookslayer~ by: netgalley
Shelves: romance-mm
Don't let the unfortunate choice of title put you off.

Description:

When half-Korean sci fi-fantasy gamer nerd Cyrus Gae goes out clubbing on his first night of vacation, he’s not expecting to be bitten by a vampire. Not in Florida, the land of sunshine and Mickey Mouse. He’s not exactly averse to being a creature of the night, but he’s righteously pissed off about the vampire’s cavalier eat-and-run attitude. Determined to track down Troy, the bloodsucker who turned him, Cyrus takes the name Vlad
...more
DeeNeez
Oct 06, 2016 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
What an absolute hoot! This is a story any geeky, gamer, role playing, cosplayer and rabid yaoi fanboy/girl would love. And I'm one of them! The humor could be a bit juvenile at times, but what the hey, Vlad is 21 and entitled to it. The entire story is told in first person by Vlad. And true, the tale is way over the top of unbelievable, but entirely entertaining. A good laugh!
CB
Jan 09, 2016 rated it really liked it
Shelves: misc-book
This book moved really fast in the beginning and used a lot of slang that made sense in the world the author was creating but I wasn't sure I was going to be able to finish it; however, I stuck it out and it didn't take long to get into it and the writing smoothed out and I ended up really enjoying the story.

Part of the "Dreamspinner Press Connie Bailey Bundle".
Sylvie
Jan 15, 2012 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
A funny vampire story. I liked id very much and will keep this author on my look out list for other books.
Shelley
3.5 stars
Roclaf Alter -Ego
A fun read but the narrator can sometimes get to be too much especially early in the book.

Should be 3.5 stars.
Andrea
Feb 28, 2016 rated it did not like it  ·  review of another edition
I finished reading it only because that's what I do. I love vamps but not this book. Had it been written using common expressions and language, it probably would have been good.
Blue Dragon
Interesting concept and characters but I wish there had been more depth to the story. The story was good but it needed more polish to smooth out the edges.
Amneris Cesare
Boring. After a while Vlad is getting annoying. Sorry. Abandoned this one too.
Alexia
rated it it was amazing
Mar 06, 2015
kawayama
rated it really liked it
Jun 27, 2015
Erma
rated it liked it
Jun 07, 2017
D
rated it really liked it
Dec 26, 2011
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Dreamspinner Press: Vlad the Paler by Malthea 1 9 Dec 26, 2011 07:34AM  
Malthea neither reveals her birthdate nor admits to a last name. She does bow to the necessity for a physical location, which currently goes by the name Gainesville, Florida, though once it was known as Alachua—which Malthea prefers as infinitely more melodic. It was here that she attended college, never managing—or indeed trying—to fit in with the football-centric student body that proudly perfor ...more
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