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Ultimate Guide to Kink: BDSM, Role Play and the Erotic Edge

4.07  ·  Rating details ·  519 ratings  ·  44 reviews
The Ultimate Guide to Kink is the first major guide to BDSM in a generation--a bold and sexy collection of essays that run the gamut from expert how-to tutorials to provocative essays that delve into complex questions about desire, power, and pleasure. The book brings together diverse voices from the kink community in an unprecedented way: each chapter is written by a diff ...more
Paperback, 475 pages
Published March 13th 2012 by Cleis Press (first published March 1st 2012)
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4.07  · 
Rating details
 ·  519 ratings  ·  44 reviews

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Roz Warren
Jul 10, 2012 rated it liked it

I got an unexpected package in the mail the other day. Because I’m a book reviewer, I somehow ended up on the list of folks who get review copies from Cleis Press, a publisher of feminist erotica. Imagine my surprise when I opened my package at the counter of the local post office, (where all the clerks know me) to find a brand new copy of “The Ultimate Guide to Kink: BDSM, Role Play and the Erotic Edge.”

As my post office pals snickered at me,
ncn nothing
Jul 25, 2012 rated it it was ok
There's some great stuff in here but it was ultimately disappointing. Starting from the beginning was a mistake because I encountered the term "female bodied" one to many times and got annoyed from the outset. [rant/public service announcement: This term is not ok. I identify as male, therefore I have a male body. Period. Some people may identify as male AND identify as having a female body, but that's a personal identity choice and not appropriate to assume.]

Okay, got that out. Secondly... I t
♆ BookAddict  ✒ La Crimson Femme
Heat Rating: Spark

Sting (Kink) Rating: 5 Stars

Story Review Rating: 4 Paddles

Interested in spicing up your love life? Ever have that yearning for something more but not sure what it is or what it means? Interested in something kinky and not sure where to start? Which book will help? The Ultimate Guide to Kink is the book for you! This book is great for beginners to learn about the skills and philosophies of BDSM. The book is divided into two sections. The first ten chapters feature popular BDS
Lee Mandelo
Mar 15, 2012 rated it really liked it
This is quite the book - 500 pages of essays by various experienced contributors, from the famous Midori to first-time writers who predominantly work in BDSM education and seminars. Frankly, I loved it. The inclusion of lenses of gender and race to discussions of kink makes this book a complex and inclusive read in a way that I haven't seen often, elsewhere. (I'm not surprised, as Taormino also edited the wonderful Take Me There: Trans and Genderqueer Erotica.)

The first half of the text is "how
Apr 02, 2012 rated it it was amazing
It has been quite a few years since we have had a new BDSM 101 book, leaving us with books that were generally written in the mid to late 90s - perfectly good and useful books but dated nonetheless. Tristan Taormino's latest book, The Ultimate Guide to Kink: BDSM, Role Play and the Erotic Edge is a excellent way to break that long dry spell!

I was hooked with the introduction, but to be fair I'm generally a huge fan of Tristan's writing. This, however, is so perfectly descriptive of my experience
Jun 20, 2013 rated it it was amazing
Shelves: sexuality, own
This book is something new in the BDSM guide genre. Well-written and engaging, the essays come from some of the most respected kinky educators and focus on the areas those educators know best. More practical than Different Loving, more theoretical (and less judgmental) than SM 101, this collection strikes quite a balance between the how-to of various kinks and the motivation behind why we practice. The book has a very contemporary feel, scanning many of the major elements of what you'll see in t ...more
Mar 21, 2012 rated it it was amazing
*Reading for review* Looking forward to learning some deee-licious stuff... *wink*

Finished, exceptionally good. Will update with full review once posted at

ETA: The Blurb: The Ultimate Guide to Kink is the first major guide to BDSM in a generation—a bold and sexy collection of essays that run the gamut from expert how-to tutorials to provocative essays that delve into complex questions about desire, power, and pleasure. The book brings together diverse voices from the kink communi
Storm Chase
Feb 10, 2013 rated it it was amazing
One of the best books for "behind the scenes" and "inside the mind of" the BDSM community that I have ever read. It's a mix of How To but also looks into the thinking of the various communities, from the leather man who thinks that safety words are a bit sissy, to the black lady who talks frankly about the ramifications of exploring race and rape in the US. Absolutely fantastic and looking forward to reading more Taormino.
Oct 31, 2017 rated it it was amazing
Packed full of insightful essays, this is a must book for any newbie to the scene...and also some more advanced practitioner and lifestyler. Can give a lot of inspiration & useful tips for your own BDSM scenes.
Amanda Hobson
Aug 07, 2015 rated it it was amazing
Currently re-reading this book for dissertation chapter and didn't quite remember just how good it is. The authors offer thoughtful and though-provoking analysis of kink and BDSM.
Madeline Elayne
Jul 17, 2012 rated it it was amazing
If you are kinky, or think you may be kinky, or you hope to possibly find out that you're kinky, I can't recommend this book enough. I don't care how long you've been in the scene, or how many pins are on your bar vest, you should have a copy of this book! I guarantee that there will be something in it that you didn't know, or haven't tried, or haven't looked at in quite that way before. And chances are very, very good that there will be something among those new areas that will make you curious ...more
Jan 01, 2018 rated it it was amazing
This book provides great information not only on the history of BDSM, but it also provides us with a modern day look into that lifestyle. It explains what certain sexual acts are and why there is appeal to it.
Bill Ward
Jul 04, 2012 rated it liked it
This is an interesting book in that it tries to be a lot of things in one. The book is divided into two sections: the first being a series of how-to articles about various aspects of kinky play, and the second being essays where sex/kink educators talk about their perspectives on a topic. Also, the book is an anthology of different authors, which although not unusual for a book of essays, is rare for a how-to book. It's edited by the inimitable Tristan Taormino who did an excellent job of wrangl ...more
Apr 04, 2016 rated it it was amazing
Read it cover to cover. Loved it, I learned a lot!
Breann Bianco
Jan 02, 2014 rated it it was amazing
If you think your kinky, this is a must read! `Nuff said :p ...more
Oct 31, 2016 rated it really liked it
Interesting stuff mixed with shallowly written articles. I liked the chapter about mindfuck. Very inspiring :)
Kenya Wright
Apr 23, 2013 rated it really liked it
Good stuff. Great for helping me with research to write more edgy erotic romances.
Apr 29, 2012 rated it it was amazing
Shelves: favorites
Excellent book covering all things kink. I loved this compilation of experts talking about their favorite things. The authors give great tips and Tristan Taormino did a great job editing this book.
Jul 25, 2015 rated it really liked it
Shelves: ucasa-echo-kink
Excellent overview book!
Optimist ♰King's Wench♰
Nov 04, 2012 rated it really liked it
Shelves: reread, non-fiction, bdsm
Still really good. Some things are starting to make more sense, others I'm still not able to fully grasp; I picked up on some things I missed the first time through.I don't think it stuck out so much that a high number of these people have been victimized in some way & as a person who works in the field of mental health I find it fascinating that they have found a way to work through their issues in a safe albeit non-traditional way; some are remarkably well versed in psychological terminolo ...more
Molly Moore
Jul 16, 2012 rated it it was amazing
The title says it all really. A collection of essay from some of the best BDSM practitioners in the world, this book is, in my opinion, acquired reading for anyone and everyone interested and connected to the Fetish/BDSM community. If you are just starting out, or a seasoned player this book has tons to offer you. Depending on your kink there maybe a couple of chapters that don't appeal to you but I would recommend you read them anyway. The animal play is an example of one of those for me but I ...more
Jan 13, 2014 rated it really liked it
Great introduction to a wide variety of topics. Some of them I happen to be very interested in and would enjoy (or actually have enjoyed) doing, while others are, frankly, just a bit weird and off-putting. Divided into two parts, the first section is techniques and the latter is fantasies/philosophies. I enjoyed the former somewhat more, I think, if only because it's geared towards the applied aspect of sexuality, which strikes me as more relevant to my own case. There were short passages of ero ...more
Mar 29, 2012 rated it liked it
Shelves: skimmed
I'm not really sure what to think of this book. As someone who has done a lot of reading on various aspects of kink and attended a few workshops, there wasn't much here that I didn't know already. The book contains both "how-to" information and general essays and theory. Each chapter was written by a different author, so there was quite a bit of repetition. Many topics are covered, including basics, impact play, fisting, rough sex, bondage, CBT, tantra, play piercing, pet play, role play, genera ...more
Sara Habein
Apr 08, 2012 rated it liked it
Shelves: own
While portions of the book are decidedly not for me, it's still well-written and will be of good use to anyone who wants to more about kink. The 'Ultimate' in the titles lives up to its name from my point of view, though I'm sure there are cranky people (as there are in every subculture) who might say, "I can't believe they forgot [this]." I really don't know what that might be, but as it stands, I'd say over 400 pages must be fairly thorough. It's not a history lesson, apart from some basics, b ...more
Геллее Салахов Авбакар
Once again Taormino Tristan brings for us a nice manual of sexual fantasies that reflect our new life especially in the domain of sexual life for young and older together, Here in the manual it is all about the Sade-Masochism entity and the psychological orientation of each partner. and how these partner can benefit from such a practice without negative confrontations.
Apr 07, 2012 rated it it was ok
This book is a mixture of stories and to be honest I found myself flipping through the ones that were more to my liking. Really this book is for your personal taste. If you like this kind of thing it might be exactly what you're looking for. Nothing wrong with that. It just wasn't for me.
Feb 09, 2013 rated it liked it
Shelves: sexuality
It is difficult to rate this book... all the chapter are written by different authors and each topic is discussed in a different writing style. Loved some of the chapters, but really didn't enjoy others.
Feb 23, 2015 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
This is a great collection of essays on various BDSM related topics written by a group of phenomenal writers that should be read by both tops and bottoms. The people who have contributed to this book really know what they're talking about and is a great addition to any BDSM library.
Jessie B.
Sep 07, 2014 rated it really liked it
An excellent collection of essays on a wide variety of kinks. I found most of them interesting and well written, though there were some I didn't care for, there was only one I couldn't finish reading.
Jun 15, 2016 rated it it was ok  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: non-fiction
Some rather disturbing issues cropping up throughout the entire work. The selected authors are usually the personalities i warn newbies to stay away from. I take serious issue with much of what is written. I would find a better guide.
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Goodreads Librari...: Add Contributors - Multiple - Ultimate Guide to Kink 7 16 Jan 09, 2017 09:27PM  

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Tristan Taormino is an award-winning writer, sex educator, speaker, filmmaker, and radio host. She is the editor of 25 anthologies and author of seven books, including her latest, The Feminist Porn Book, 50 Shades of Kink: An Introduction to BDSM, The Secrets of Great G-Spot Orgasms and Female Ejaculation, The Ultimate Guide to Kink: BDSM, Role Play and the Erotic Edge and Take Me There: Trans and ...more
“That's what's so ironic about the conservative backlash against BDSMers. With increased visibility comes increased bigotry, and conservatives continue to rally against kinky events by local groups to get them shut down. What the anti-kink fanatics don't understand about us is that we're geeks. Sex nerds. SM intellectuals. We pay money to spend a weekend going to classes.” 27 likes
“You are the evil scientist of your desires. - Ignacio Rivera” 23 likes
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