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Screw the Universe

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Space, the hopefully not copyrighted final frontier.

Out there is a universe teeming with new and strange life, with science and probably magic and wonderment. And out there, in that inky black void, is a spaceship whose crew honestly could not give a crap.

Welcome to the Zdravo. Home to a crew more concerned with getting ice cream than with saving the galaxy, under the command of a federation that grants promotions based on filthy acts performed behind only occasionally closed doors, and captained by a man whose only goal in life is to bone as many lifeforms as he can, a captain who truly wants to screw the universe.

145 pages, ebook

First published July 16, 2011

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About the author

Stephen Schwegler

6 books10 followers
Stephen Schwegler is the author of Gag, Scattered Together and Perhaps., the co-author of Screw the Universe and one time head of livestock at Jersey Devil Press. There's a high probability that he's sitting on his couch right this very minute not being the least bit productive.

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5 stars
9 (30%)
4 stars
7 (23%)
3 stars
8 (26%)
2 stars
4 (13%)
1 star
2 (6%)
Displaying 1 - 6 of 6 reviews
Profile Image for Danger.
Author 33 books658 followers
August 24, 2011
If you're looking to have a light chuckle or a pretentious snort, then this book probably isn't for you. Now, on the other hand, if you want to laugh your ass off at one of the funniest books I've ever had the pleasure of reading, then by all means buy this. On the first page alone I laughed 3 times, loudly, alone in my apartment, like an idiot. And the book never lets up.

I think that Schwegler and Gumeny must be evil geniuses. You can almost feel their glee as they sadistically murder, remurder, molest, mutilate and embarass nearly every character in the book. It's puerile, but also extremely clever. It's full of sex and violence, but as far from erotica or horror as you could possibly get. It's an easy read, but not easy to put down. The dialogue moves along at roller-coaster speeds. Puns abound. You never quite know what ridiculousness the next page may bring. Oh, and it cost less than a dollar! Seriously, for the amount of entertainment you will get from this, you'd of paid much more. At least a $1.50.
Profile Image for Frank.
Author 34 books112 followers
May 8, 2013
Take one part Futureama, one part Airplane!, a pinch of MAD magazine and a heaping tablespoon of Penthouse Forum and you get SCREW THE UNIVERSE by Stephen Schwegler and Eirik Gumeny. This book of short stories about the follies of a hapless crew of lunatics defines irreverence. Break out the knee pads because this one is a knee slapper the whole way.

From the word go this one is full on silly. The crew is chosen and assigned duties by means of paint balls. Mission after mission is full of tomfoolery. The captain dies more times then Kenny from South Park. The First Lieutenant gets laid by a nymphomaniac Private. The doctor is in charge of the rec room and the ship's veterinarian acts as the ships doctor. And all that just scratches the surface of the ridiculousness of the whole thing.

I love the balls to the wall comedy. It brings to mind the Farley Brothers movies like Naked Gun and Airplane. It doesn't let up. Admittedly, at times I found myself get a bit tired on the constant silly but then something would make me laugh out loud and I couldn't stay mad.

Bottom line: If you like the Simpsons, South Park, Adult Swim and/or Leslie Neilson then grab this interstellar comedy. You're going to be smiling from cover to cover and the people around you will think you mad when you laugh out loud uncontrollably at the funniest moments.
Profile Image for Chris Rhatigan.
Author 36 books38 followers
June 13, 2013
It's difficult to write funny, but Jersey Devil Press is consistently producing very funny s***.

I found Danger Slater's Love Me and Eirik Gumeny's Exponential Apocalypse both hilarious, but Screw the Universe is every bit as good.

The authors say they're glad the creators of Futurama didn't sue. It does have some overlap with that excellent TV show--a group of misfits bumble around space and shenanigans ensue--but Futurama never got one tenth this weird. I wasn't even sure what exactly was happening half the time, but that didn't matter because of the absurdist humor and constant stream of dick jokes.

This is chaotic, gory, sex-filled sci-fi bizarro that moves at the speed of, you know, something fast. I burned through it on the last couple of hours of an excruciatingly long flight--I don't think there's any better way to spend your 99 cents
Profile Image for David.
Author 12 books136 followers
July 30, 2020
This is hilarious and wild. I wish they’d made a movie or show out of this instead of at least one of the later Trek incarnations. It’s hard to believe this can be sustained through the whole book, but it really works. I had a ton of fun.
Profile Image for Adam Smith.
Author 2 books30 followers
September 15, 2013
Captain Tyler and the crew of the Zdravo are on a mission. A mission to screw every living thing in the galaxy.

While this book did have a few humorous moment the majority of the text came across more as madlibs run amuck than actual comedy. The lack of a central story was what put me off most though; things just seemed to happen. It seemed like the only point to a lot of things was for the sake of being random.

I'm sure there are people who would find this book great, but for me it was just too over-the-top for its own good.
Profile Image for Stephen Schwegler.
Author 6 books10 followers
August 4, 2011
Love this thing. And since I'm a co-author I can actually offer a semi-unbiased opinion. Incredibly glad to be a part of this hilarious space adventure.
Displaying 1 - 6 of 6 reviews

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