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Love Me

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3.90  ·  Rating details ·  121 ratings  ·  47 reviews
Do you like tales of Cold War espionage? Taut psychological thrillers? Science fiction as a metaphor for U.S. foreign policy? How about cute angst-filled teenage vampire toyboys? Well, too bad. None of those things are in this book. Instead you'll join a guy in a Viking suit on an absurdly epic quest to figure out the meaning of life. There will be obstacles, of course: ra ...more
Paperback, 168 pages
Published July 26th 2011 by Jersey Devil Press (first published July 16th 2011)
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3.90  · 
Rating details
 ·  121 ratings  ·  47 reviews


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karen
Dec 28, 2011 rated it really liked it
did you ever wonder what a "danger slater" looks like??? it looks like this:

 photo DSC09731_zps4e3482a6.jpg

DO IT FOR DANGER!!

fun!

heh.

this book was a rollicking bit of occasionally dirty-minded fun.

what is it about, you ask? shit, i didn't expect to have to answer this one. okay. well - it is about a very self-confident man who lives in a castle of human skulls surrounded by a moat of crocoweilers, who is horrifically lonely, hundreds of years old, and seemingly invincible. it is also about gangs of geriatric mall-thugs, fre
...more
Arthur Graham
Mar 14, 2012 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
"I am the loneliest man to ever live. This is not a matter of opinion. It is a fact. If there were a prize given out for bleak, soul-crushing loneliness, I would undoubtedly win it, year after year. Of course, no one would come to the ceremony. Which is exactly my point."

So we're told near the outset of Danger Slater's Love Me, a book crammed so tight with slapstick and satire, penises and pathos, it's no wonder the sprawling monstrosity doesn't split the seams of its polyester swish pants. The
...more
Danger
Aug 02, 2011 rated it it was amazing  ·  (Review from the author)
I know what your thinking, but no, I am not the same Danger Slater that wrote this book. Weird that we share the same name, right? So speaking at a completely objective third-party observer who has absolutely no stake in the success of this novel, even though a few positive reviews and some good word of mouth could make or break the author's budding career as a world-class novelist and, quite possibly, the greatest lover that mankind has ever known, I have to say that THIS IS THE BEST BOOK I HAV ...more
Jenn(ifer)

Love Me Love Me ~ Say that you Love Me -- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bUIElv...

"I'm just contemplating the futility of life and my unintentional impact on it." I shrug. "Nothing Special"

Let’s see what the critics had to say about ‘Love Me’ (the goodreads critics, of course, not that other, useless kind of critic):

• “…a fun strange journey through the psyche of a delightfully deranged author. like vonnegut, but with more erections..” ~ karen

• “A highly impressive first novel, Love Me is fun, f
...more
Joseph
Nov 19, 2013 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: fantansy, fiction
“Startled, I accidentally knock over my inkwell. A black tsunami of ink sprawls out across the page, engulfing the tiny village of my words. They are swept away into the midnight sea. Gone forever. I am bereft.”

Do you ever get one of those books you really wanted to read, but instead of reading it you set it aside and will get to it in a week or so? That happened to me last year. I received a free copy of Love Me by Danger Slater. So almost a year later, I read the book and wonder why I didn’t r
...more
David Fleming
Mar 13, 2012 rated it really liked it
To be perfectly honest I usually stick to the classics or books that are at least twenty or so years old. But, secretly, I've been looking for a book that honestly reflected more modern sentiments. I wasn't let down with "Love Me!"

There are a lot of clever little things going on in this novel so I'll name a few that most impressed me: the false histories (mismatched technology and references throughout create a unique and fun world), the modern pop-culture allusions, the alliterative prose styl
...more
Shamus McCarty
Jul 26, 2012 rated it really liked it
I like this book, so I will review it. It will be that greatest review in the universe. When other reviews read my review they will wish they were my review. They will write my review letters, asking for advice, begging to be 1/1,000,000,000th as awesome as my review. My review is kind, but it is only a review and incapable of responding to so much fan mail.

My review will write a review to handle the fan mail. My review's review will not be awesome, for I did not write it. Billions of reviews w
...more
Kate
Dec 07, 2011 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Recommends it for: The Absurdist In All Of Us
Recommended to Kate by: Danger Slater
Shelves: bizarro
Hahahahahahaha...I don't even know where to start with this one.

I thoroughly enjoyed this book. It was hysterically absurd, absurdly bizarre, and bizarrely original. It's about this dude who wears a traditional Viking outfit complete with hat, has lived for thousands of years in a castle made of skulls, does some strange beauty ritual with blue-green algae and is on a mission to discover what the true meaning of life is.

While he is on this mission he has some mishaps which are absolutely hilario
...more
Frank
Feb 20, 2013 rated it it was amazing
Indie press has been hitting it out of the park lately. LOVE ME by Danger Slater is batting clean up and just launched one into the 2nd level. Who cares about the big names on the shelves for 5 times the price? There is no point any longer. Danger Slater is a name that needs to be up in neon lights.

LOVE ME is the story of a god-like being who can do and be anything he can think of in his brilliant mind. He his handsome beyond the likes of Brand Pitt, he is brilliant beyond the likes of Dr. Michi
...more
Douglas Hackle
Nov 08, 2012 rated it really liked it
Sort of like Candide on bath salts.

Witty, conceited, well-hung, and horribly lonely, the narrator-hero of Love Me is a 243-year-old man who preserves his youth and good looks with a special exfoliating salve of his own making and lives by himself in a castle built from skulls. When he forsakes his castle to go seek out the meaning of life and existence and whathaveyou, a series of zany misadventures and disillusionments ensues.

A highly impressive first novel, Love Me is fun, funny, picaresque,
...more
Rodney
Nov 22, 2013 rated it it was amazing
Have you ever met someone that is so pompous, arrogant and narcissistic that you can't help but love them? Me neither. The protagonist in the book is that guy. I couldn't help but be totally amused by how absurd and hilarious he was. He is said to be the loneliest man alive, most likely because of how much of an asshole he can be.
The author is very crafty in the way he writes. The descriptions were vivid, the situations were hilarious. To sum it up, the book was poetic ridiculousness.
The adven
...more
Donald Armfield
Sep 16, 2011 rated it it was amazing
Do you like crunchy peanut butter. How bout a man willing to be your refrigerator and vomit out your food on demand.

Strap on your Authentic Traditional Viking Outfit and let Jesus into your heart. Could've went without Jesus talk but still made me laugh (not for believers)

From Mallrat Gangs to 100 years later after his clumsy death with a toaster, we follow a conceited guy in the search of Love. Or not to be alone ever again. I won't say so much but a guarantee laugh.

Warning besides being highly
...more
sappho_reader
Apr 11, 2013 rated it it was amazing
Simply put, this is a hilarious tale filled with absurd bizarro humor. I giggled and laughed my way through each chapter. Love Me follows the story of a centuries-old man wearing a Viking hat and living in a castle made of skulls. After being rejected by a publisher for his manuscript which he determined will be the best novel in the history of mankind, he is visited by a Jehovah Witness which leads him on his own journey to discover the meaning of life and to find love. What follows is a very f ...more
Vanessa Wolf
Jan 03, 2013 rated it it was amazing
Shelves: not-in-kcls, owned
As others have gone on about the text, let me just open with how awesome the art in this book is, if you grew up on the original art for Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark, you will love Shawn Vales art. A bit more whimsical perhaps, but Vales is more nuanced. If nothing else this is why you should buy a copy. Also, very good quality binding for something not bound in Caspian tiger leather.

Others have mentioned the dick jokes and scat oriented humor. I for one am unamused by scat jokes. I've read
...more
Matt Hlinak
Feb 24, 2013 rated it it was amazing
Love Me by Danger Slater (with whom I share a publisher) is philosophical, filthy and funny. The novel is about a god-like being's existential quest for Answers to the Question. If you ever wondered would it would be like to pull the Big Bang's pants down and crawl up its rectum, this is the book for you. I cracked a smile on every page and laughed out loud at least once per chapter. When Danger Slater commands you to love him, you better do it.

Matt Hlinak
Author of DoG
Jeremy Wallendjack
May 02, 2012 rated it really liked it
If you haven't read the back cover/product description on Amazon for Love Me, my advice is this- don't take anything too seriously about the book. It's nothing more than a fun experience to read and there is a good moral to it all. It starts out with a strong opening and concludes with a better closing that really ties everything together and doesn't let the reader down. In between the opening and closing is the story of a protagonist who: is never really given a name-except for one chapter by a ...more
Sally
Oct 14, 2011 rated it really liked it
I'm a sucker for stories that push the edge, that take pop-culture obsessions and tear them to pieces, so when Danger Slater came to me with Love Me, describing is as "a tongue-in-cheek satire heavily steeped in speculative-fiction/absurdism/bizarro.....think Forrest Gump if it were directed by David Lynch," I was only too happy to take up the challenge.

With a set-up like that, any book should be doomed to failure - except he tosses in just enough Monty Python, Douglas Adams, and even Looney Tu
...more
Kate
Sep 22, 2011 rated it it was amazing
Recommends it for: The Absurdist In All Of Us
Recommended to Kate by: Danger Slater
Shelves: bizarro
Hahahahahahaha...I don't even know where to start with this one.

I thoroughly enjoyed this book. It was hysterically absurd, absurdly bizarre, and bizarrely original. It's about this dude who wears a traditional Viking outfit complete with hat, has lived for thousands of years in a castle made of skulls, does some strange beauty ritual with blue-green algae and is on a mission to discover what the true meaning of life is.

While he is on this mission he has some mishaps which are absolutely hilario
...more
Tamara! aka AmyG.Dala
Surrealistically bizarre, at times pretty disgusting (bathroom humor abounding in that male dominated way), yet...hilariously clever throughout. I had plenty of LOL's, gigglesnorts and, well, those 'ewww' moments too. I found it to be, over all, pretty damned funny.

Quote from our egotistical lonely guy that hooked me early into his powerful 'biography': "But I fight through the pain with Karate and power tools."

Sadly, while my review cannot even remotely compare to Etienne's, I humbly offer thi
...more
David
Feb 13, 2013 rated it really liked it
This book was actually a lot of fun. It is wild, imaginative, and humorous. It will give you the answers to all your questions and then give you all new questions. Though that'll end up really being a wash, your new questions will be highly superior to your old questions. Only a fool won't be able to tell the difference between your new questions and your old questions. Regardless, it's a fun book to read.
Stephen Schwegler
Hilarious. Whatever you're expecting forget about it. I challenge anyone to find a story like this anywhere.
Fox
Feb 22, 2013 rated it liked it
Danger slater was so kind as to provide a copy of this book for download on Valentine's Day. I must say, this was far better than the traditional romantic fare that one would get on such a holiday. Much better indeed.

Love Me is... well, difficult to describe. Either Danger Slater has produced a masterpiece of satire and glory, or something more akin to Chuck Palahniuk post-Haunted fare. Which I reckon some people would call a masterpiece anyway, so that may make my point moot. Well, I wavered be
...more
Risa Di
Apr 19, 2012 rated it it was amazing
If you like to laugh, while simultaneously pondering your existence, read this book immediately! In Love Me, we follow the fantastical, yet somehow completely relatable, main character through a life changing journey as he tries to figure out his place in the world while accidentally creating the fundamentals of our existence. He’s sometimes sad, often vulgar, definitely blunt, and always funny. Sound complicated and hard to read? It’s not! While the underlying themes of Love Me might be ones ph ...more
Amanda
Dec 19, 2011 rated it really liked it
This book is definitely intended for a narrow audience. But for that audience it is hilarious and awesome. But it's not just all zany humor. Slater also demonstrates a clear understanding and knowledge of the rise of Western society and culture. Underneath the humor and the allusions though what the book really is is a parable for anyone who ever searched for the meaning of life and wound up agnostic or atheist. The one drawback to the novel is that this work needs an editor (or another editing ...more
therwiterkelly
Jun 05, 2013 rated it really liked it
Do you want 6, count em SIX 35 minute long train rides filled with incessant smiles and giggles? Then I recommend this book to you. Actually, if you just wanna smile in the first place and have a few hearty laughs I recommend this book to you. However, if you're a niche reader in search of a niche read then I recommend this book for reading on a train. It made my commute feel like 34 minutes instead of the usual 35. Now to the average review reader this may seem insignificant, but if you truly b ...more
Kati
Nov 05, 2011 rated it it was amazing
This book is... Oh my wow. This has to be the most random crazy book I have EVER read. The story line has an important meaning but you have to read the whole book to get it. Its so bad its funny. The fact that it is crazy is what makes it so memorable. It actually reminds me a lot of my ex. It has many perverted things in it so its not for the faint hearted. Sorry this is all over the place. Hilarious. Whatever you're expecting forget about it. I challenge anyone to find a story like this anywhe ...more
Christy Stewart
Discombobulated and otherworldly, this book sits very firmly within the genre of bizarro; meaning if you don't know what you're getting into there is no preparing you but if you are already a connoisseur there will be nothing to surprising you.

Funny, sexual, and crude this is the perfect beach read for those who drive to the beach only to prefer being locked in the car.
Georgiann Hennelly
Oct 07, 2011 rated it it was amazing
Whatever your expecting from this book . forget about it . Its hilarious laugh out loud funny .I especially loved when he got into an arguement with the moon and punched him in the face. I bought it on kindle, wish i had bought the paperback, so i could share it more easily. looking forward to more books by this author
Jessica T.
Feb 20, 2013 rated it it was amazing
There's a picture of this book next to the definition of fun. Think Tom Robbins after a crack/strip club binge...
Jarrod Scarbrough
This was a bizarre little book. Quite funny and always very quirky, it was a good way to spend the weekend.
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Wonderland Award winning author Danger Slater is the world’s most flammable writer! He likes to use a lot of exclamation points!
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“Startled, I accidently knock over my inkwell. A black tsunami of ink sprawls out across the page, engulfing the tiny village of my words. They are swept away into the midnight sea. Gone forever. I am bereft.” 15 likes
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