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Confessions of a Counterfeit Farm Girl

2.78  ·  Rating details ·  1,125 Ratings  ·  288 Reviews
A laugh-out-loud memoir about a city slicker who discovers that Manolos and manure just don?t mix.

At her husband?s prompting, suburban mom and New York career woman Susan McCorkindale agreed to give up her stressful six-figure job. Together, they headed down south to a 500-acre beef farm, and never looked back. Well, he didn?t look back. She did. A lot.

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Kindle Edition, 372 pages
Published (first published 2008)
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Nov 07, 2008 rated it did not like it  ·  review of another edition
McCorkindale is not a gifted story teller. She's far too self-conscious and the would-be funny parts are so belabored, overworked--that they just aren't funny. It was like spending six hours with a girlfriend who finds herself hilarious.
Dec 04, 2008 rated it it was ok  ·  review of another edition
I really think it deserves only about 1 1/2 stars at most. Her sarcasm was just wearing. A little goes a long way and she uses sarcasm a LOT. Her footnotes were frankly annoying. I would have preferred to read them as part of the book itself, as they were really parenthetical comments. This book was highly recommended and I had high hopes for it, but I just couldn't like it / her. Too self absorbed.
Jul 29, 2009 rated it it was ok  ·  review of another edition
Recommends it for: NY fashion lovers
Recommended to Laura by: amazon clearance
I realized why I didn't like this book much on p. 232 when the author explained, "I'm pretty sure he (her husband) thought that once the girl left the city, the city would leave the girl, but I'm simply incapable of making that kind of metamorphosis. In fact the reverse is true; I'm doing my best to Park Avenue this place up. You might say I'm on a mission to cosmopolitanize the country."

Rather than learning or growing from her rural experiences, the writer remains adamant that Starbucks is a n
Dec 05, 2011 rated it did not like it  ·  review of another edition
My hats off to all the magazine editors who turned Susan McCorkindale down, editors about whom the author bitches in some of the last chapters. Those editors were right--this is not funny or well-written. Too bad the editors at Penguin didn't think so. Whiny, annoying, and downright poorly written. I just plain didn't like it. All the parentheticals and footnotes are a poor attempt to be funny and/or conversational with the reader, but end up simply as evidence of a lack of thought given to comp ...more
Sep 06, 2009 rated it did not like it  ·  review of another edition
I couldn't resist picking up this book when I found it on a sale table. Sounded like an fun concept (I have my own dreams of living on a farm one day), plus it's set in Virginia. However, so far I'm not enjoying it much. One reason being that the author is far to much of a whiny princess to be likable.

Ok, I managed to finish and, frankly, I hated it. The only reason I slogged through was because of the location of their farm, which is about an hour from where we live. We actually just visited th
Dec 20, 2008 rated it did not like it  ·  review of another edition
I tried really really hard to like this book but the stupid footnotes (multiple sarcastic notes on EACH page - so distracting) just ruined the book for me each time I had to pause to read them. They really ruined the flow of the book.

As far as her writing goes, yes she was overly sarcastic, but that's fine. Yes, she gloated a lot about her plush job and spoiled life style, but that's just goes to show that there really are people out there that are THAT self absorbed. If I hadn't had to pause e
Oct 02, 2011 rated it did not like it  ·  review of another edition
I picked this book up because I'm a city mouse faced with the very real possibility that my work and life may take me to the country. I was hoping for a memoir that would ready me for the transition. This was not it because this may be one of the worst books ever written. While I won't go so far as to call the author names, I will go so far as to say that she has written herself as a summarily unlikable hag with a penchant to believe the world somehow owes her something. Reading this book was pa ...more
Trisha Clark
Oct 02, 2008 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Recommends it for: everyone who wants a good laugh
The city mouse moves to the country in this REALLY, REALLY funny book. Susan put her hyper-personality in the pages with her signature tangents that are even funnier as footnotes, lists, indexes and much more that pop up throughout for a truly enjoyable read. The best part (and the most important part, I think) of the book is its ability to speak to you personally, whatever hat you are wearing at the moment - working mom, stay-at-home-mom, wife, daughter, sister, friend, PTA president - about to ...more
Jul 14, 2011 rated it it was ok  ·  review of another edition
I must admit that I have a dream to live on a farm. Nothing like the farm she describes in this book. I would like 5-10 acres to have sheep... for my dogs. The thing is I am born and breed in the suburbs and while my husband is from a farm state (Nebraska) he is not only against living on a farm but he is not handy around the house. Worse he does not want to learn. So when I read the cover of this book I thought I could get some insight.

Susan was the marketing director for the publishing company
A friend said she thought of me while she was in Border's and saw this book, so I picked up the first copy I could find. Let me just say, I would rate this book "Hated It" if that were an option. Susan McCorkindale is the meanest, most self-centered person I have encountered in a long time. I pushed myself through a few chapters thinking it would have to get better, but I threw the book down in disgust. Before I took the book back, I skimmed a bit, thinking I hadn't perhaps given her a fair shak ...more
Jan 15, 2009 rated it did not like it  ·  review of another edition
I couldn't do it. I just couldn't finish it.

I love memoirs. I love fish-out-of-water-stories. I just couldn't get past the author's "oh aren't I clever / funny / darling" wink-wink writing style.


You're not.
May 26, 2009 rated it did not like it  ·  review of another edition
I'm giving up on this. The author is shallow, vapid, immature, whines a lot, and is obsessed with doing as little as humanly possible. I'm not sure I can stand any more time spent with a woman who does so little and feels entitled to so much.
Kim Patterson
Dec 20, 2011 rated it did not like it  ·  review of another edition
I can't even finish this book, and that's very unlike me. It's just too painful. I vacillate between being extremely annoyed with the author to feeling pity for someone who is so miserable in every aspect of her life regardless of what she is doing or where she is.

Materialistic and shallow, I don't think this woman can ever be happy with anything she has or any circumstance she finds herself in. It's too bad she can't just appreciate all that she has or at least something she has. I am pretty s
Dec 05, 2011 rated it it was ok  ·  review of another edition
Recommended to Molly by: book club (Rachel K.)
Somewhat funny but unexceptional fish-out-of-water memoir.
The humor is the second biggest problem; the writer tries to be funny with every sentence and it’s just very tiring to read.
The biggest problem, especially for the first half of the book, is the writer complaining about moving to the sticks (Virginia) after life in New York/New Jersey. It’s not like she’s surrounded by coal miners – her social set/neighbors are rich, too. Mostly it really got to me because it reminds me of people who m
May 15, 2012 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
I really liked this book! It had quite a few bad reviews so I was a little hesitant to read it but I'm so glad I did! The author, Susan McCorkindale, is hilarious! She writes about her experiences of quitting her high-paying job in NYC and relocating with her husband and two boys to a farm...where they actually farm. ;) Each chapter is a mini story of something that happened so you almost feel like you're reading her journal. I could relate with her on so many levels, which is always a great thi ...more
Heather Mize
May 31, 2011 rated it did not like it  ·  review of another edition
One of the worst books I've ever read....McCorkindale's title is misleading, and this book is a trite book about a self-absorbed ego maniac with absolutely nothing worthwhile to say. It's amazing to me that this book could even be published. McCorkindale is so saracastic and egotistical about everything that it's actually hard to stomach. She's trying to be funny, and witty, but the problem is that she's not telling us a story, she's just going on and on about herself, and her wants and needs re ...more
This is really a two star book, but I gave it 3 because she moves from New Jersey to Upperville, Va and she talks about Winchester, Paris, Va and Middleberg, which makes it marginally more interesting if you are familiar with those places. This is supposed to be a collection of funny stories written by a magazine editor who quits her job and moves with her husband out to the country (David Sedaris type of book), but it actually just isn't particularly funny. It is a good read for the pool becaus ...more
Dec 09, 2008 rated it did not like it  ·  review of another edition
McCorkindale's super forced attempt at humor fell flat for me. Not only was this book completely lacking in unfunny prose but also unendingly vapid. I'm sorry I wasted my time struggling through 2/3 of the book in search of even a tiny morsel of content.

I've said it before -- humor writing is probably the most difficult to successfully accomplish. A light read is one thing. This book lacked even a modicum of merit.
Nov 22, 2008 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Oh my goodness, I laughed until I cried reading this book. Seriously I was reading this during piano lessons and probably looked like I was having a seizure trying not to laugh out loud. VERY, VERY funny! Especially having grown up on a farm (a REAL farm girl!) I could still relate to her funny farm experiences and still share her love of shoes! So entertaining!
Oct 12, 2009 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
I always have such a hard time with the rating system... this book wasn't "amazing" in that it changed my life, but I did really like it. "Suzy" is witty, charming, and likeable throughout the book. I'm jealous that I wasn't friends with her while she was going through the two years at Nate's place, I could have used the chuckles!
Oct 02, 2008 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Recommends it for: Every Woman
She may be new to the country, but she's certainly not new to funny! Susan McCorkindale's first book had me laughing out loud. Her light-hearted, cheerful charm is a joy to read and I'm eagerly awaiting book #2!
Aug 14, 2011 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
As a Farm Girl myself there were many experiences that I could directly relate to in this.
Oct 31, 2017 rated it did not like it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: dnf
A DNF for me. Made it about 1/3 and called it quits. Too much sarcasm and snarkiness from the author. I should have figured it out sooner when one of the early chapters was about ways to get out of working the magazine job she hated yet loved the salary and perks. Also a lot of poking fun at Southern people and living. I didn't really find that very comical. Don't waste your time with this one. And, she wrote a sequel. Why?
Sep 29, 2017 rated it did not like it  ·  review of another edition
wow this book was horrible! I even read the reviews before and thought I would still give it a shot! Her jokes and sarcasm are annoying as well as all the subtexts on every page!!! I never quit on a book in case it eventually gets good but this one just didnt go anywhere. Im embarrassed for the author and feel bad for her kids she talks poorly of throughout the entire book! 😯
Jun 08, 2017 rated it did not like it  ·  review of another edition
Jul 17, 2017 rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: bookclub-read
This was a great choice for Book club. Laugh out loud funny in places.
Oct 27, 2017 rated it it was ok  ·  review of another edition
Had some humorous parts but had a hard time wanting to pick it up to finish.
Rating: D-

First Line: "If anyone had ever told me I'd leave my big-city job and suburban home for rural country living, I would have declared them a few bristles short of a brush," (Author's Note, p. xi).

Review: I'm having a hard time writing this negative review because in the last chapter of this book, McCorkindale writes about how she wants to be the next Nora Ephron (not the highest of literary heroes, but to each his own) and what rejection is like. I wish she hadn't written that--and made
Feb 25, 2017 rated it did not like it  ·  review of another edition
Susan complained for about 90% of this book, about pretty much everything imaginable. After a while I was just sick of hearing it and honestly probably shouldn't have finished this book. I was hoping for a more funny, or even interesting, read about a city to farm transplant and this wasn't that. Everything Susan said about rural life just dripped in condescension. I just can't jive with someone who literally refuses to adapt, let alone wear sensible shoes on a farm. One chapter wasn't even abou ...more
Jennifer Heise
Sep 25, 2013 rated it did not like it  ·  review of another edition
I was all excited to read this, seeing as the author moved from Ridgewood NJ to Virginia farm country, and I'm more of a country girl (wanna-be farm girl) who currently resides near Ridgewood. Sounds like fun, right?

Not so much. In fact, not much at all.
Not only did I not finish it, but my Brooklyn-to-Long Island cosmopolitan roommate didn't finish it either.
First of all, McCorkindale doesn't appear to have moved to Farm Country so much as "We run cattle on our property in order to get farming t
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Susan McCorkindale is the mother of two sons and new wife of a successful winemaker. She is also the author of two memoirs. The first, Confessions of a Counterfeit Farm Girl, is the laugh out loud true tale of her move from the suburbs to the sticks. The second, 500 Acres and No Place to Hide: More Confessions of a Counterfeit Farm Girl, is her charming, poignant, and uproarious follow-up.
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