Shut Up and Stay Married: The Secret to Marriage Success

by Yisroel Roll

Psychotherapist Yisroel Roll helps couples discover the secret of a successful marriage. The message is not about communicating better with your spouse or what you can do for your spouse. The secret lies with you. This mariage handbook presents easy to understand, practical strategies to breathe new life into your relationship. Simple techniques one can use every day to- • Find happiness in marriage • Get along without hurting each other • Prevent small arguments from escalating into major blowups • Build an atmosphere of trust in your home • Rekindle the deep feelings spouses once had for one another • Feel good about yourself-and your spouse.The same principles-though with different strategies-are presented for creating a happy family, empowering kids, and motivating them to thrive. Yisroel Roll, a psychotherapist in private practice, has inspired and helped improve thousands of marriages. A dynamic motivational speaker, he has presented marriage workshops around the world.

120 pages, Paperback

First published March 31, 2011

Reviews

[April · Rating 5 out of 5]

Shut Up and Stay Married: The Secret to Marriage Success is the fifth book by Yisroel Roll, a psychotherapist, divorce mediator, and motivational speaker.
　
In this book, the author teaches the reader the secret of a successful marriage: to Shut Up. "Shut up?" you ask? I know, I thought it was a weird concept as I began to read the book and asked myself "Surely he doesn't mean that we should let digs and rude comments continue without question." But, no, it turns out that the author means that one shouldn't respond to a negative comment with a negative comment, and we should not dwell on them. He introduces a way of communicating with a spouse, or a child, that would not cause the other party to become more defensive. Such simple concepts like using "I" instead of "You" (i.e. "I feel embarrassed when...." instead of "You embarrass me") would work wonders in a relationship, and allow both parties to earn and give respect and trust once again. 　
The book teaches the reader that it is crucial to feel positive about one's self, to respect ourselves, and recognize our personal character strengths and weaknesses. Once we've achieved that, it would be easier to "Shut Up and Stay Married". Once we learn to become emotionally independent, our relationship would be more harmonious. This book teaches the reader how to accomplish that.
　
Yisroel Roll is an incredible writer, and has filled this book with motivation and encouragement that drives the reader to fix themselves in order to fix their marriage. Not only can these practices be used with a spouse, but also in how we communicate with our own children. He has filled the pages with advice on just that subject. The reader will learn how to stop criticizing, stop lecturing, how to empower our children, motivate them to change, and more.
　
Shut Up and Stay Married is a wonderful book, and one that should be required reading for all married couples.

[Shirley · Rating 5 out of 5]

When one in two marriages ends in divorce, there must be something we are missing. Shut Up and Stay Married could be the essential guide to making that ratio change for the better. Herein lie lessons from an author who practices as a psychotherapist, offering couples and families methods of bringing love, equality, honesty and trust into the union. When couples learn to communicate with the other person's feelings in mind, not out of spite, but rather with an attitude of wanting to understand, then it becomes less of an argumentative relationship and more of a union based on love and respect.

There's a lot to be learned for many, if not all the readers. Take your time, try the exercises and communicate over the teachings herein. It can make a world of difference to you and your relationships.