Have a New Kid by Friday: How to Change Your Child's Attitude, Behavior & Character in 5 Days
Tired of defiant attitudes and power struggles with your little ankle-biters? Then you need this book. With his signature wit and wisdom, internationally recognized family expert Dr. Kevin Leman reveals why your kids do what they do and what you can do about it. He gives you simple principles that can give y...more
I have to say that overall, I felt that Leman only made two valid points throughout the entire book, and that the rest was just filler (or letters from "grateful" readers, plugging this book). The first point that I felt merited some thought was to not encourage/engage in arguing with your child. Later, when they want some favor or treat, you say "no"--if they ask why, you explain--once--that you di ...more
-say it once, then walk away
-B doesn't happen until A happens
-don't get angry (but apologize if you do)
However, his main points are buried in a book dominated by so many flaws that I found it painful to read. The most important of these flaws are covered by other reviews, but to list a few that bugged me:
The LAST thing I want to convey to my children is a sense of shame. The main purpose of how I parent is to teach them t ...more
The first chapters are about the general principles of his parenting theory, which I would sum up as parents need to stay in control, not get angry, say it once and walk away, ...more
After reading the book and testing out some of the ideas in a modified way in my classroom, I have to say that this stuff really does seem to work as far as getting difficult kids to see that it is time for them to change. Not only did it give me some new techniques for working with kids, but the advice that really helped me was that of not feeling guilty about offering true guidance to kids, which sometim ...more
It is a helpful resource for anyone working with children as well. The techniques and lessons can be applied to the children you work with.
A few weeks ago I saw this book, by the same author, lying in our Library Sale stack. What a gem! Mr. Leman is clear and to the point. A few things I especially appreciated is the way he placed focus on the need your children have for time with you (building relationship.) They might not be conscious of this, either because they are 2, 12, or ...more
1. Kids need acceptance, belonging, and competency to thrive.
2. When it comes to discipline/expectations: say it once. Turn your back. Walk away. I.e., don't nag.
3. Let reality be the teacher. Learn to respond rather than react. (Let natural consequences teach.)
4. B doesn’t happen until A is completed. I.e., The next fun thing doesn't come until current expectations are met.
These are important concepts and certainly merit consideration, if you have not yet thought about them and impleme ...more
I just read Have a New Kid by Friday by, Dr. Kevin Leman. It was pretty good. I would give it 4 or 5 stars. Easy to read, simple steps to implement, reminders of what really I already know, but it is often so hard to DO what we know we should.
I guess I don't know for sure if it works yet, because as we all know, it means I need to change, in order for it to work.
Jenn is doi ...more
- It's strongly rooted in American Christian Conservative cultural values, and may be less palatable to those of other backgrounds;
- It makes false assurances of 100% effectiveness that make it sound unnecessarily like snake-oil.
"Just walk away— your child *will* back down" is advice that succeeds most ...more
'"Honey, I told you we're not having cookies and milk today." Matthew was stunned. He opened his mouth to argue, then walked away sadly.'
Here's what would happen in real life: Matthew was stunned. He screamed for 2 hours and threw a chair at the wall.
Or: Matthew was stunned. He argued all afternoon, all night, and continued arguing until his parents were ...more
Seriously, aside from a random rant warning against nursing past one (how does this have anything to do with discipline?) and some rather horrifying advice (lock a kid who refuses to stay in bed outside for 10 minutes) the guiding principle of this book is good (when B, then A). I tried it last night after finishing ...more
Good ideas, helpful info. In all actuality, after reading this book, I realized that my kids are actually GREAT kids afterall! :)