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Gil's All Fright Diner

3.89  ·  Rating details ·  9,942 Ratings  ·  867 Reviews

Bloodier than Fried Green Tomatoes!
Funnier than The Texas Chainsaw Massacre!

Welcome to Gil's All Night Diner, where zombie attacks are a regular occurrence and you never know what might be lurking in the freezer . . .

Duke and Earl are just passing through Rockwood county in their pick-up truck when they stop at the Diner for a quick bite to eat. They aren't planning to sti

Kindle Edition, 275 pages
Published June 27th 2006 by Tor Books (first published May 1st 2005)
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Matt Although told in the third person, you may find this book to be a bit skewed to a man's perspective. Women are described in terms of their sex appeal…moreAlthough told in the third person, you may find this book to be a bit skewed to a man's perspective. Women are described in terms of their sex appeal or lack-there-of. If you are easily offended by such things then it is best to avoid this book. The humorous story is a bit diverting, but you are not missing out on a classic of Western literature, if you skip it.(less)

Community Reviews

(showing 1-30)
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Melissa ♥ Dog/Wolf Lover ♥ Martin
Oh my Lord! I needed this laugh today!

We have Duke who is a werewolf and ole Earl who is a vampire. They end up stopping at Gil's Diner because Duke is hungry. They meet Loretta who owns the place for reasons and she offers them a job when they help kill off some zombies. 😂

I loved the pictures in my head of the old diner in the backwoods next to a cemetery in a small town. We have ALL kinds of supernatural creatures! What fun 😄

I loved the ending! Omg! It was perfect 😊 I want to read more of thi
Jeffrey Keeten
Nov 08, 2016 rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: horror
”Loretta outweighed him by at least a hundred pounds. Nonetheless, Sheriff Kopp held his ground with the courage of a man who had seen sheep explode spontaneously and lived to clean himself up later.”

Any apocalypse is about living to tell about it, right? The interesting thing about this small community is that spontaneously exploding sheep aren’t the strangest things that happen.

When Duke and Earl saw the glowing sign of Gil’s All Night Fright Diner appear, they had no idea they were about to s
Jul 27, 2011 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Recommends it for: fans of irreverent UF
Fast, fun read. Solid four stars for cleverness and silliness--the book blurb was right, this was silly in the style of Hitchhiker's Guide, and that's a high compliment indeed.

It starts off like a buddy movie of the anti-hero variety, with Earl the vampire and Duke the werewolf driving around drinking beer in a beat-up pickup whose cab holds exactly 76 empties. They stop at an all-night diner run by Loretta, but little does anyone know, the diner is under assault by the most fearsome of opponent
Jun 04, 2015 rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
Gil’s All Fright Diner, first published in 2005 (and was Martinez’ debut publication) is a fun, no strings attached, steaming hot cup of have-at-you! urban fantasy.

Earl and Duke, vampire and werewolf respectively, arrive in Rockwood, a town in the middle of nowhere that has had more than its share of occult goings on – most of which seem to surround the vicinity of the all night diner.

Along the way, Martinez introduces us to zombies, ghosts, ghouls, a teenage sorceress and references to the “Old
I really liked this book. Very fluffy, but a nice tone and funny. Makes fun of the vampire/werewolf genre that has become ridiculous lately with the swoony man-chests. Would recommend to people who like Christopher Moore and other tongue in cheek fantasy adventures.
Loved Loved Loved this book!

I am a big fan of campy fun novels. Books that make the unbelievable seem like, yeah.. ohkay... that could happen.

Meet two unlikely best friends: Earl (a vampire) and Duke (a werewolf). Throw in an all nite diner run by a very large, very spunky Lorreta. Sprinkle in a teenage wanna-be mistress of the old gods, a few ghosts, and a ton of zombies/ghouls and slimy, tentacled, oozing things, and you have yourself one helluva kick ass novel!

This was one of those books i j
Aug 16, 2008 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Recommended to Chloe by: Lori Hettler
I'll be the first to admit that there's been a glut of books like this on my reading list lately. Humorous takes on horror archetypes seem to be all the rage right now, which is more than fine by me. They're quick, light and entertaining- just the break I need in between the other books that howl at me from the shelf, trying to guilt me into reading them next.

Gil's is a buddy adventure starring Earl the Vampire (think Dwight Yoakam with fangs) and Duke the Werewolf (think Jesse Ventura with fur)
Apr 12, 2009 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: horror
Melinda raised her head and uttered a low, haunting howl. The rest of the herd joined her in a bloodcurdling moan that seemed to bubble up from the sulfurous pit of Hell itself


Gotta love those zombie cows! Rockwood is sort of a Texas redneck version of Sunnydale with its own answer to the Hellmouth. Vampire Earl and werewolf Duke run out of gas in the God-forsaken county of Rockwood and offers to help Loretta, owner of Gil's All-Night Diner, solve her zombie problem. Bu
ᴥ Irena ᴥ
Gil's All Night Diner is a weird place. It's way too big to be in Rockwood. 'Unfettered by the laws of normality, the unnatural ran rampant in Rockwood County.' Its owner, Gil, disappeared a while ago and nobody knows where he is. Today Loretta is the one who is managing the place and she needs all the help she could get. She and her shotgun can't keep up with all the zombies that have been trying to enter the place every night.
Enter Duke and Earl.
Being paranormal creatures themselves (werew
Noran Miss Pumkin
May 01, 2008 rated it did not like it  ·  review of another edition
Recommends it for: No one ever! never to kids!!!!
Recommended to Noran by: good reads
Shelves: worst-bks
The first page had most of the 7 famous words, driving while drinking, and the phrase "yellow puddle formed around my groin". I really do not think this is a youth book! The curse words got worse from there, and graphic underage sex was also included. The obese werewolf, describes the fatty woman's butt. as it jiggles--like the last time he disemboweled someone--lovely. Just what we want to teach teens today to think about large people--new insults!

The only reason for a star is the lovely romanc
Gil's All Fright Diner - the title makes you think WTF is this? - and that cover! I admit that is why I bought it. Come on just look at that baby - There is a huge one eyed monster coming out of that Diner! I love monsters. As soon as I saw it I was like "Oh jeezuz I have to read this!" Maybe thats just me but I'm a total cover whore and I never can tell what I'm going to be attracted to. One thing for sure this had just the right amount of playful and monster for me, and not your atypical trait ...more
May 08, 2015 rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: audio-books
Originally posted at The Book Nympho
Icon Read It Track Iticon AUDIOBOOKicon snarkyIcon Library Book

Read It, Track It is a way for me to track books for my reading challenges and they will be super short.
I've wanted to read Gil's All Fright Diner for a while now. My husband has it on his bookshelf but after I saw it was available on audio and that Fred Berman was the narrator I had to request it from the library.

Gil's All Fright Diner features an unlikely couple of friends, Earl (vampire) and Duke (werewolf). These two rednecks drive into town and fin
Nov 29, 2013 rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: comedy, horror, 2013
3 out of 5 stars

The writing is light, fast paced, and doesn't take itself or anything else seriously. It's funny at times and somewhat poignant at other times when you least expect it. The humor is not what I'd call sharp or hilarious, but it's absurd enough to carry the story through to the end and unusual enough to hold my attention.

A better review is posted at Wordpress and Booklikes.
Apr 07, 2009 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: library
What a fun read!!!! This would make a HILARIOUS movie. It's silly, it's goofy and has plenty of horror and gore to go around. It's marketed as a young adult novel, don't know if I would go that far...but it was just a good time. I read it in a day. I would like to see further adventures of Duke, Earl, Cathy and Napoleon. I liked this book so much I reserved a copy of A. Lee Martinez's In The Company of Orges.
Rebecca McNutt
Mar 28, 2015 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
This book is hilarious! It reads very much like watching a retro drive-in movie and it's full of laugh-riot humor, exciting and creepy situations and likeable characters. Definitely worth reading if you're a fan of horror, comedy or adventure.
Feb 23, 2018 rated it really liked it
Earl and Duke are just a couple of rednecks, driving along in their pickup truck minding their own business until one night when they pull into an all night diner. What they find is a diner owner with a bit of a zombie infestation problem. This doesn't fluster anyone nearly as much as one would expect since it seems that weird stuff isn't a new phenomenon in the small town. Did I mention that Earl is a vampire and Duke is a werewolf? And that they have their very own meet-cute story? Well, they ...more
“When you cross over into the weird stuff, there's no going back. Hector has a theory on it. Calls it the law of 'Anomalous Phenomena Attraction.' He explained it to me once. Didn't really pay attention, but it boils down to 'weird shit pulls in more weird shit.”

This was absurd and crazy. A teenage girl trying to bring on the apocalypse and a werewolf, a vampire and a ghost trying to prevent it. Sprinkled with zombies (including zombie cows!), ghouls, evil old gods and a lot of gore. Thankfully,
Jan 23, 2009 rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: fantasy, humor, horror
A light, fun, though ultimately rather sophomoric read. The gratuitous cursing didn't bother me, but the author's treatment of female characters did-- out of the three main women in the book, one is a creepily oversexualized, underage evil-nymphet stereotype, and another is a waitress who, though a very sympathetic character, is overweight and therefore treated as disgusting and undesirable. (Interestingly, one of the main male characters is also passingly described as very large, yet somehow th ...more
Lisa Schensted
in a sentence or two: the funny journey of Earl the vampire, Duke the werewolf, Loretta the overweight waitress, and Cathy the ghost in their quest to rid the diner of zombies. and as if that isn't enough, a foxy teenager is trying to open the gates to hell right underneath their immortal noses.

Duke and Earl stumble upon the little diner in rockwood county (read: middle of nowhere). within minutes, they are defending the diner from zombies. the good news is, zombies aren't really that bad - just
Will review later, but allow me to tease you with this:

I had some issues with this book, but it was also one of the rare books where I felt it was sort of okay to let some things slide. Why? Because when a book is about:

zombies (human)
zombies (bovine)
teen sorceresses determined to end the world
horny teen minions
Ancient Gods
tentacled hell beasts
graveyard guardians (ghosts)
dead terriers (ghosts)
determined mini-golfers (ghosts)
obese werewolves (main character)
balding va
The Flooze
Feb 24, 2009 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Recommends it for: Christopher Moore fans
Martinez's debut novel is a wild ride, at once horrific and hysterical. Despite what I've been taught, I judged this one by its cover and it lived up to my every zany expectation.

Earl, a scrawny vampire, and Duke, a hulking werewolf, stop off at a roadside diner for a bite, only to become entangled in a web of dark magic where things bite back. But zombie cows, cemetery guardians, ghostly dogs and spirits that reside in Magic 8 Balls aren't enough to deter this duo from doing their best to preve
Aug 04, 2007 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: comedic-horror
This is a fun book. It's about a vampire and a werewolf that try to stop Elder Gods.
And it's a comedy!
I think it's great, there's a lot of weird stuff in it but overall it's just a fun and rather silly book that is a really good read.

OK, it's been 4 years since I wrote this review. I should probably try and expand on why it's so good.
In short it's about a vampire and werewolf that are kind of stuck traveling together that stumble upon a small town that seems to have a bit of a zombie problem. T
Literary Ames {Against GR Censorship}
Good lord, that was bad. But I can understand why some like it. The humour, frivolity and flippant nature of the characters towards all things supernatural just wasn't to my taste. Where were the disbelievers, those ignorant of the paranormal or the crazy fist-shaking fanatics hell-bent on ridding the world of evil doers?

Everything was designed to be quirky, to draw a laugh or a smile from the reader. From the melodramatic evil Lolita determined to take over the world any way possible, seducing
Jul 07, 2009 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Recommends it for: everyone.
Recommended to Michael by: Paul
A vampire and a werewolf walk into a diner...

and an awesome book ensues.

I heard this book was not as good as the newer ones, which I loved as well, but this one is far superior. The humor is less forced, more natural in its delivery, and the writing is damned good, especially for a debut.

This is not high art, unless you consider entertainment art. But it is a simple, good read, something that makes the commute fly by, something that you'd take on a plane and not worry about the turbulence. I'd c
harlequin {Stephanie}
Jul 27, 2012 rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
Recommends it for: Classy rednecks... with a sense of literary quality. =)
Shelves: library-rentals
Beeware, folks this makes a mockery of everything. If they could redneck caviar it would get done in this book.

Thanks for the pic!

That was awkward. I feel like I should have laughed more. =/ Don't know if I would recommend it, but somehow I didn't hate it. Didn't burst out laughing at random jokes either.

Why the high rating you ask? I enjoyed the characters of Duke, Earl and the all the random zombies. It gets inventive!

Thanks for the pic!
Jan 05, 2009 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Oh, this book was wonderful. It spoofs a lot of the werewolf/vampire/etc. cliches and themes. Earl the vampire and Duke the werewolf are traveling together and stop at a diner to get something to eat just before the place is attacked by killer zombies (again). They agree to stay and help the harried waitress/cook/owner figure out why her diner is being targeted. Hilarity ensues. I definitely will be checking out more offerings from this author!
Jeanette  "Astute Crabbist"

THIS IS NOT A REVIEW, although the rating does reflect my opinion of this book.
This is a heads up for people following my reviews who have their filters set up to block general updates. If you've enjoyed nosing around on my shelves in the past, be sure to read my most recent update. This is the last time I'll mention it.
Now I think I'll go consume some nightcrawlers.
Aug 24, 2014 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: read-2014
Enjoyed this book immensely
Fun silly and filled with "horror" in the same vain that Ghostbusters and Evil Dead 2 are both 'Scary Comedies'
I enjoyed the humor so much I am progressing on to more books by this author!
Peter Tillman
OK, I get it that this is satire, and it does have moments, but it's, well, gross: a fat werewolf, a fatter diner proprietress, an army of zombies wielded by a teenybopper who has ambitions for World Domination, not to mention placing her obnoxious boyfriend on an Altar of Sacrifice so she can hear him beg for mercy. Laughing yet? I'm not.

Humor is the least predictable genre. I *loved* Emperor Mollusk, but about the best bit so far is Duke the werewolf and Earl the vampire in their beer can-fill
Brendan Nicholls
Jun 14, 2016 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Martinez's is an interesting writer that takes what should be a jumbled mess and turns it into something coherent. I read Monster before diving into this one so I will say my interest for his stories has grown. I liked the mythology here and the characters, much like Monster the villains retain that awkward humour and banter just like the heroes. Tammy is an intriguing villain and I never fully understand why she wants to ascend with the old gods but she gets sadistic quite quickly which heighte ...more
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A. Lee Martinez was born in El Paso, Texas. At the age of eighteen, for no apparent reason, he started writing novels. Thirteen short years (and a little over a dozen manuscripts) later, his first novel, Gil's All Fright Diner, was published. His hobbies include juggling, games of all sorts, and astral projecting. Also, he likes to sing along with the radio when he's in the car by himself.
More about A. Lee Martinez

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“Reality is like a fruitcake; pretty enough to look at but with all sorts of nasty things lurking just beneath the surface.” 95 likes
“When you cross over into the weird stuff, there's no going back. Hector has a theory on it. Calls it the law of 'Anomalous Phenomena Attraction.' He explained it to me once. Didn't really pay attention, but it boils down to 'weird shit pulls in more weird shit.” 36 likes
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