Who Is My Neighbor?: Lessons Learned from a Man Left for Dead

by Wayne Gordon

An “expert in the law” once asked Jesus what he must do to inherit eternal life—and his question initiated a very interesting conversation. The Law says to “love your neighbor as yourself,” Jesus pointed out, so the next logical question is, “Who is my neighbor?” Rather than offering the lawyer an exhaustive list of neighbors and non-neighbors, Jesus told a story . . . a story we know as the Parable of the Good Samaritan. Out of that famous parable, Dr. Wayne Gordon draws more than 40 characteristics of the man who was beaten, robbed and left for dead on the road to Jericho—the character Jesus created to show Christians how to recognize their neighbors. Dr. Gordon brings that character vividly to life in Who Is My Neighbor ?, and helps readers use Jesus’ parable as a reference point for their interactions in their community and the world. And as readers catch Jesus’ vision of neighborliness, they will also find practical suggestions for meeting needs and changing the lives of those around them . . . that is, their neighbors!

Genres: Christian, Nonfiction

208 pages, Paperback

First published October 20, 2010

Reviews

[Ruth Ann · Rating 4 out of 5]

My biggest "take-away" was found in chapter 33, My Neighbor Feels Helpless. Gordon says, " If people are hungry, we can give them food. If they don't know how to read but are willing to learn, we can teach them. But ministry to those who have lost hope is far more complicated." Gordon goes on to explain the Stockdale Paradox and psychiatrist Martin Seligman's work with dogs and conditioned hopelessness. He cautions that as Christians we must be careful not to offer advice that might just make things worse for those we are trying to help. When we see people who are hungry or hurting, feeling humiliated or beaten up by life, we can't just blithely say, "It's gonna be alright. Everything's gonna work out because God loves you." To do so is to offer false hope. " Instead we need to acknowledge when a situation is hard to cope with or when conditions are difficult. We need to paint a realistic picture. Even as we encourage people to trust in God's love and provision, it's okay to admit when something is hard. In fact, it's more than just okay; it's incumbent on us to do so. Strange as it may seem, the people to whom we are ministering, will find some measure of comfort in our honesty. We might not be able to offer much for them to hold on to, but at least what we offer will be REAL.

[Barb Watson · Rating 5 out of 5]

A FANTASTIC BOOK FOR THOSE WHO WANT TO GROW IN THEIR CHRISTIAN WALK IN PRACTICAL WAYS! It's very easy to read as each chapter is only a few pages long. Mr. Gordon suggests you read it slowly and think (ponder) over each chapter. I will certainly be giving this as gifts. It is written around Luke 10, THE GOOD SAMARITAN.

I am going to put the Title of each Chapter here -- it should be easy to figure out who your neighbor is!

My Neighbor (IS)

1. ... Hurting
2. ... Needs Help
3. ... My Neighbors Are Those Who Cannot Help Themselves
4. ... Someone Who Appears On My Path
5. ... Someone Who Has Been Robbed
6. ... Someone Who Is Half Dead
7. ... Someone Who Is Naked
8. ... Someone Who Is Unable to Ask for Help
9. ... of a Different Race
10. ... a Stranger
11. ... Someone Who Has Been Stripped
12. ... a Foreign Traveler
13. ... Has Been Beaten Up
14. ... Might Require Me To Take a Risk
15. ... Can't Walk
16. ... Looks Horrible
17. ... of a Different Religion
18. ... Destitute
19. ... a Victim of Injustice
20. ... has been passed by
21. ... Can't Say, "Thank You"
22. ... Someone Who Has Been Wounded
23. ... Someone Nobody Wants to Help
24. ... Lonely
25. ... Will Cost Me Some Time
26. ... Visible
27. ... a Victim
28. ... Someone Who's Been Violated
29. ... Vulnerable
30. ... a Human Being
31. ... Feels Humiliated
32. ... Feels Helpless
33. ... Poor
34. ... Someone I'm Afraid to Help
35. ... Someone Who Is Dangerous to Help
36. ... Someone Who is Discouraged
37. ... Someone Who Might Cost Me Money
38. ... in Need of Tender Loving Care
39. ... Someone Who Feels Defeated
40. ... Someone I Am Able to Help

[Jill · Rating 3 out of 5]

I heard Wayne “Coach” Gordon speak at a church workshop earlier in the spring and picked up a copy of this book. I was intrigued, as I’ve been struggling with that question shown in the title. Who is my neighbor and who am I on the hook to care for? I was feeling overwhelmed with caregiving on a number of fronts and wasn’t ready to face the realities of the message of this book. So it sat until a couple of weeks ago. I picked it up and my suspicion was confirmed that my neighbor is everywhere I look. But reading this message during the summer months, when my “care taking” and more official neighborly duties are in the off season allowed the message to truly resonate. And in the midst of my reading this book, my sweet elderly neighbor in the house next door fell ill and very quickly passed away. In the midst of trying to be a good neighbor to her, and her daughter, son and extended family in this last week, this book has taken on new meaning.

At times, I felt the constant reminder of the Good Samaritan at the beginning of every chapter to be wearing—yet sometimes that level of repetition is what it takes to hammer a message home in my head. And I get it now—my neighbor is everywhere, everyone. Caring for them is an attitude and an opportunity. And certainly caring for Miss Shirley in these four years we lived next door was a privilege, as was helping her family through this process of her loss and their new normal. Care giving and being neighborly certainly can be wearing, but I appreciated the message of the book that it is an attitude and ultimately a blessing to me to be a blessing to others.

[Sarah Tsai · Rating 2 out of 5]

Great concept - but I don't feel like it goes deep enough. It has a very broad overview of who are neighbors are; however, i think the book would more impactful if it went deeper on a few of these ideas instead of trying to cover everyone.

[Bo White · Rating 4 out of 5]

I really liked this. I visited a good friend in Lawndale during college and have a visual context, but more and more I have seen not only the author's convictions ring true, but his credibility on the subject is sky high. I will read sections of this book again. Well worth the time.

[Meepspeeps · Rating 5 out of 5]

Author takes the parable of the Good Samaritan and makes it a 40-day devotional and call to action. Every Christian small group should study this book together, and every non-Christian should have a couple copies available to hand to any "typically hypocritical" Christians they meet.

[Kimberly · Rating 3 out of 5]

I read this as part of a small group participation in a Lent Bible study leading up to a community service project. The book is a bit redundant in parts, but accomplishes its purpose of opening the reader's eyes to realize our "neighbors" are more than just the people next door.