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320 pages, Hardcover
First published April 19, 2011
"You don't want to beat yourself up for beating yourself up in the vain hope that it will make you stop beating yourself up."
"The best way to counter self-criticism, therefore, is to understand it, have compassion for it, and then replace it with a kinder response."
"Because of our innate tendency to move away from pain, it can be extremely difficult to turn toward our pain, to hold it, and to be with it as it is. This is why so many people shut themselves off from their emotions. It's a very natural thing to do."
"...one of the best ways to forgive someone is to recognize the causes and conditions leading the person to act as they did."
"...self-compassion allows you to widen your outlook so that you can fully appreciate and acknowledge all aspects of life, the bad as well as the good."
"Flattery seems a lot better than insults, of course, but how many of us really take the praise in? Own it. Delight in it."
"Our sense of self may be so infused with feelings of inadequacy that it becomes frightening to see ourselves as worthy and valuable. Ironically, this can feel like a sort of death to us, and our negative sense of self will try hard to survive."
"What really matters is that our hearts and minds are open. Rather than continually evaluating, comparing, resisting, obsessing, and distorting — we simply open. Open to seeing ourselves and our lives exactly as they are, in all their glory and ignominy. Open to the love of all creation, ourselves included, without exception."