Thoughts on Sprites 1.6.1

I'm fairly happy with parts 1-5 so far, but 1.6.1 isn't what I was hoping to have as a first draft release. It's short and doesn't explain either of its parts very well.

The first part, where E effectively hacks her mother out of her life, needs further explanation and perhaps an actual scene where she explains it to someone else. This is foreshadowing for an argument later on in the book, but it's also a way to write out the mom character until I need her. In a .2 release I'll likely place this later in the story, and perhaps write something here that might lead to the script.

This scene is also here to show that E might be an unprofessional slacker, but she has enough computer skills to do something like this without sweating. This means two things: she has skills most people today still don't, but that these skills aren't necessarily advantageous. It's another way that I'm hinting at the fact that this story takes place in the future, where somewhat impressive computer skills have become rudimentary and dull.

I'm happier with the second part, where E is fired yet again. It echoes the beginning of the story, and is another moment where E fails at something. The boss' speech is important and will be one of three things that leads to the first-third climax (1.10). The next two crises will happen in .8 and .9. Still, two things I want to improve in the new version is her reaction and describing the scene around them. Unlike the first firing, I'd prefer to have this happen in a busy moment, where the restaurant is buzzing with activity around them.

This chapter also doesn't end with anything beyond a quick text, which is something I'll fix in a .2 release. Carly is be an important character (and she exists in A Record Year for Rainfall, for people making graphs at home), and I know I want to use her for something cool in part 2. But I'm not sure how best to utilize her as someone who helps the plot progress in part 1.