Share The Joy

He could not write to her in the same way.  Instead his letters were full of news, detailing what he was doing rather than what he was feeling.   There seemed to be a block between his heart and his mind, and his brain refused to commit to paper the myriad of emotions that welled inside him for her.  There was an empty space inside him that she had filled.  Now, he was hollow again.
-Betrayal of Love and Freedom
a novel by Paul Huljich
based on a little truth

September 29, 1988
I wrote four postcards to Paloma today. 1.  The Beverly Hills Hotel and Bungalows Postcard

Paloma,
Thanks for the cassette tape and the French tunes.   Well, I guess I shall thank Alexandre.  I am working on a cassette tape of music right now (for you).   I hope you like it.  You may recognize a few of the tunes….Anyway it is exactly what I am listening to these days.
With regard to family…all is well.   My brother, Tony, and his wife, Helen, bought a house in Castro Valley, California.   My brother, John, and Sherri are ‘okay’.   Sherri just got a new job at STAR ROOFING COMPANY.   John is working at the HOLIDAY INN.   My mom is still working at the post-office.   She’s doing okay.   I spend a lot of time with her.   I took her to the CLIO Awards last Sunday (the Awards for the BEST TV advertising commercials).   That was a great postcard of the ‘LEGS’ that you sent me!
  2.    Beautiful Carmel Beach Postcard

I hope you’re teaching Jonathan some English, too.   You don’t want him to come here and hate it like you did ‘at first’ because of your hard time with English.   I wish I’d met you when you first arrived here.
WE do have Levi 501 jeans here that are sold ‘already faded’.   They don’t expressly say that they are two year old jeans though.  They run about $28 to $30 (I guess).  If you want a pair I will look for you.   You don’t have to send me the money.   Just give me your size (38 inch waist, right?).  Ha-ha.  I’ve seen them at THE GAP, too.
I framed the photo of your dad, Bernadette, me, you and your stepmom, standing arm in arm.   It looks good.   I also have a number of those photos from that Paris evening in 1985 in my photo album.   You look so good in this photo.
As soon as I get some ‘top notch’ shots of me from the ELITE MODELING CENTER in San Francisco I will have to send them to you.
 
3.    Sunset on Waikiki Beach, Honolulu Postcard

I guess it looks like I stole your idea here of writing you via a variety of postcards.   I used to buy all kinds of postcards (and save them)…but I’ve decided to SHARE THE JOY and send them out to those that I know won’t just throw them out.
I haven’t made definite plans for Halloween 1988 yet.   I may fly to Los Angeles OR I may celebrate at a new San Jose Club called ONE STEP BEYOND.   They’re celebrating their 3-year anniversary at this club and MINISTRY is supposed to perform there.   MINISTRY is the group that plays that song called EVERYDAY IS HALLOWEEN.
  4.    Sailboats and the Golden Gate Bridge Silhouetted by a Beautiful Summer Moon postcard

That is pretty wild about the PALOMA RESTAURANT in Berkeley, isn’t it?   I will have to eat there one day.   Then I will see if I can find out why they named it after YOU.   Maybe it’s an ex-admirer of yours!  Ha-ha
I actually collected the enclosed postcards from 1) Beverly Hills 2) Carmel 3) Hawaii and this 4th one from San Francisco.  I hope you look closely and like them all.   Also…enjoy the tunes.
I had to babysit for three hours the other night for Ashley and Holly.   They were good girls though.   We watched THE SUMMER OLYMPICS. 
Have a happy day and tell Alexandre for helping your choose the great music.   If I counted on YOU it would’ve been strange (probably). Ha-ha.
Later…LOVE, Michael
September 30, 1988

It was Friday morning and my sister-in-law, Sherri, called to see if I could come over to watch the girls (Ashley and Holly) for a couple of hours.  John and Sherri had some errands to run.   I was more than willing and able.   I was also a stone’s throw walk to their house on Cook Lane.   This was too easy.

PHOTO:   John, on a typical Friday morning
 I discovered Ashley in the bathtub.  I was surprised she didn’t scream hysterically when I took a Polaroid photo of her in the bathtub.   I knew I could use this photo as ransom someday in the future…perhaps.PHOTO:  Ashley in the tub



   John and Sherri left the house and I had fun with the kids.   Ashley was riding her tricycle in the backyard.   It was a very summer-like day for the last day of September.   I loved how Holly was trapped in her little walk-a-long stroller.   I didn’t need to keep a hawk’s eye on her given that she was confined in that toddler machine. Mom called by phone.
I answered, “Hello.”
“Mike?” She asked in a surprised tone.
“Yes, I bet you thought you had dialed the wrong number.  You did dial John and Sherri house.  I’m babysitting.  They went out for a while.”
“I was wondering.”
I laughed.
“As soon as they get back I’ll ride my bike over to your house.”
“Okay…are they being good?”
“Yes.  I just took a picture of Holly in Sherri’s desk chair to see how she’d look as an executive.”
Mom laughed.

Holly has been such a cooperative model.   She’s all smiles.  She’s so docile.  I kept her entertained with a few stuffed animals and managed to get her to strike-a-pose.


 
I took a reflective self-portrait of my own reflection, using their round mirror.
 Soon I was free from the babysitting.   I had a great time.   I popped over to see mom (as promised).

 Later that day ‘Jim from the Gym’ came over.   We were going to go out out-on-the-town.   He needed to vent his 'Christine Hicks' frustrations.   I had to vent a bit of my ‘end of Amy’ frustrations as well.  

I had forgotten my sunglasses at my mom’s house, so we stopped at mom's house to retrieve them.   I had mom take a Polaroid photo of ‘Jim and I’ before we left for ECHO BEACH, a San Francisco nightclub.

 
 I brought my Polaroid along to the nightclub. 
“I want to shoot photos of potential dates and get your opinion,” I remarked to Jim.
He laughed ‘his distinct laugh’.

 
  Upon arrival to the nightclub there was a line to get in.   It moved quickly and we saw a real-life blond gal spray-painted in gold near the stage.   I thought that was unusual, yet creative.

The ‘bartendress’ was named Pam.   I carried on a conversation with her and I’m sure she thought I was trying to swoop on her.
I whispered to Jim, “I know she thinks I’m swooping on her.”
Jim laughed ‘his distinct laugh’.
I think Pam, the ‘bartendress’, thought I was a young kid (like twenty-two years old).   After continued discussion I advised her that I was twenty-eight.   She seemed surprised.   She was probably my age but I doubt anything would come of it.  She seemed to have baggage of her own (from her own past).
PHOTO:  Pam, the bartendress
 I also met a girl on the dance floor.   I liked her style.  She wore a black leather mini-skirt and a white blouse.   Her smile and eyes seemed to say something ‘to me’ as we danced; however, I only got a couple of Polaroid photographs of her.   I didn’t get her telephone number, so if fate agrees I may see her again when I return to this nightclub---or maybe not.   Whatever will be…will be.

 

 
      October 1, 1988
The next morning I felt the silence.   I took a photo of my living room area.   It is said that one can tell a lot about someone from their living room.   I wonder what my living room says to the independent bystander.
PHOTO:  My Living Room
Today was the Saturday that mom and I made a visit to the Alameda County Fair with Ashley.    She has an attraction to the MY LITTLE PONY plastic toy that was promoted back in 1983 (the year before she was born), so it was fun to see her on a real-life pony.   She also seemed comfortable with the friendly ducks, sheep and goats.  It was fun to be still, to simply watch Ashley 'experience'.

People are always worried about what's happening next.   They often find it difficult to stand still, to occupy the NOW without worrying about the future.   People are not generally satisfied with what they have; they are very concerned with what they are 'going' to have.--The Art of Racing in the Raina novel, by Garth Stein