Lessons from Bad Books

So I'm reading a disappointing book at
the moment. No worries, not by anyone I know... I just finished one
and went to my pile for a 'quick read' and pulled out a mystery, as I
am meant to be revising a mystery and so am trying to keep in mind
what works and doesn't. Sadly, I've found a COUPLE 'doesn'ts'
recently, so maybe I will include lessons from more than one book...







SHOW SHOW SHOW.




One of the most annoying things about
the one I am reading is it all feels like summary. Even the DIALOG
feels like summary. I'm not sure if it is the choice of narrator—the
author SORT OF changes perspective, but is not terribly DEEP in any
of them, so I'm not FEELING IT and so all of the PoVs end up feeling
just descriptive.









DIALOG, TAGS, and NAME CALLING




The thing that is REALLY driving me
crazy is the author keeps having the characters call each other by
name instead of using dialog tags. This is something I did a lot in
my first book and I felt very clever, but I have since read enough
WATCHING for it that it comes across as melodramatic. Watch
Supernatural some time—Dean and Sam use each other's names a lot
and it is just so much silliness (but they look good enough to make
me watch anyway—not so with no moving pictures). Once in a
conversation or LESS is much more realistic. Granted, there are
people who do this, but making it a tic for ONE character is a far
cry from making all of them do it. MOST people DON'T do this.







TENSION Must be SPECIFIC





This book keeps using vague threats and
expecting me to keep reading. I am irritated. Sadly, I am also a
person who usually finishes what I start. Tension should be tangible.
Maybe it is because they haven't attached me to the characters—maybe
if I cared more this vague tension would feel more tense—there HAVE
been attacks, but the characters aren't well drawn and the incidents
don't have any sort of build or tease. It is more 'this person does
something stupid and this bad thing happens'









AVOID TOO-STUPID-TO-LIVE




Or if you can't, kill them. If you need
a character to do something really stupid, give them a compelling
reason (like cut off their other options, or increase the stakes so
they think they have no choice, or MUCH earlier give them a
compelling flaw that this situation fits so the reader thinks, well
sure, it's stupid, but it is her only real flaw). I get SO ANNOYED
with characters who seem set on their own destruction unless it is
part of a complete profile that is on a danger course. You CANNOT
convince me that an otherwise competent, mentally stable person is
that dumb. Seriously.







Oh, for Pete's Sake, DUMP the DAMSELS
in DISTRESS!!!




I like a hot guy as much as the next
girl, but I am SO not interested in reading about a woman who needs
to be saved all the time. Maybe ONCE. After she's saved a bunch of
people herself. But habitual victims are NOT interesting.









So there. Read any bad books lately
that have taught you what not to do?