My guest, Suzanne Johnson…Show and Tell.

Add some 'Tell' to your 'Show'

Writing books, workshops, tips from pubbed authors will always include that one bit of advice: Show, Don't Tell.

It's great advice–for the most part. But in writing fantasy (urban or epic), it creates some challenges for both the author and the reader in the opening chapters of a book.

Have you ever picked up a new book, begun reading it with great anticipation, gotten to about page ten, and realized your eyes have glazed over? But you soldier on, and by page fifteen, your glazed eyes have crossed and are at half-mast. Because–now you're willing to admit it–you don't know what the hell is going on in the story and, what's worse, you don't care.

That's the byproduct of too much "show" and not enough "tell" in the beginning of a novel.

I've spent the last couple of days judging contest entries for an RWA chapter in the paranormal category. All but one suffered from this problem. They did a great job of starting the story in the middle of a scene. They grabbed my interest. The characters had potential. And then the scene went on…and on….and on…ad nauseum, and after fifteen pages, I had no idea what the characters were gnashing their teeth over, or whether we were going to be dealing with vampires or goblins, or why I should care.

They didn't need tons of back story–heaven forbid. But, c'mon guys, give me one freaking SENTENCE of context. Ten words of narrative to make all that showing mean something.

This holds true whether you're writing speculative fiction or "straight" romance or erotica. Definitely start the book in the middle of some attention-getting action. But by the end of chapter one (and don't make it a really, really long chapter one), make sure your reader has a few things well in hand even if you have to TELL them.

?What world your story is set in. This doesn't mean you have to be world-building like a sci-fi or fantasy author. If your story is set in modern-day Pigtrot, Mississippi, make sure the reader knows that. If you can't figure out a way to work it into your action, tell us.

?Who your major players are, or at least your hero or heroine if you're going to alternate POV chapters, and if you can't work it into the action for gosh sakes tell us what they do for a living or why they're in the middle of whatever scene they're in and a tiny hint at whatever big issue is going to follow them through the story.

? A clear sense of who's important. In your determination to "show," don't have your opening scene so action-packed that you've thrown a half-dozen characters into the mix, ten of whom end up to be minor players in your book. Your reader doesn't know that and will hate you because they've tried to absorb info about Uncle Earl-Ray they don't really need to know. (Okay, I'm Southern, so I have folksy examples?sorry.)

?At least two significant questions unresolved or unanswered. Set up a short-term conflict and a long-term conflict. Often the long-term conflict is an inner one. The short-term can definitely be shown, but usually the inner conflict has to be at least hinted at with a little tell.

Okay, off the soapbox now. A good test of this is to have someone who doesn't know anything about your story read your opening chapter, then tell you what questions the chapter has raised for them. It should be things that point at the big conflict. If it's about a minor character, or wondering where it's set?or they're so confused they don't know what to ask or, worse, don't care enough to ask…well, you've probably missed your mark.

Show vs. tell: it's just not that simple!

BIO: Suzanne Johnson is an author of urban fantasy and paranormal romance. The first two books of her new urban fantasy series set in post-Katrina New Orleans (because, sadly, she was there at the time) will be released in 2012 by Tor Books, an imprint of Macmillan. You can check out her blog at http://suzanne-johnson.blogspot.com or follow her on Twitter at http://www.twitter.com/Suzanne_Johnson. Suzanne lives in Auburn, Alabama.

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