Just before my seventeenth birthday, I woke to my mother standing above me with a chef's knife raised and ready to plunge. I screamed. She lowered the knife and walked out of my bedroom without saying a word.

It wasn't the first time she'd raised a weapon, or her fists, against me. No, never when she was sober. But sobriety and my mother didn't often meet.

I moved out the next morning and spent the rest of my senior year of high school sleeping on my best friend's floor.

Abuse warps, twists and changes the inner child into something different, not less, than who that child was created to be. Without love, support, healing, and letting go of the pain and bitterness, the twisting can destroy.

But with love, support, healing, and letting go, the twisting spurs growth and strength. I was blessed. My neighbor cared for me, my friend gave me a place to sleep, my drive got me through college, my husband proved to me I was worthy to be loved, and I found a passage of scripture (Psalm 139) that gave me hope.

There were times I had to force myself to take the next step. I transferred colleges because I started drinking too much and realized I was following my mother's path. I wrote my blessings and my strengths down in a journal when I felt humiliated and worthless. I focused on the future when I was tempted to bury myself in the past.

It took people to build me up from the outside, and discipline and faith to build up my soul.

My latest book, Haunting Megan, begins in my teenage home; the opening chapters are autobiographical. Writing them was therapy for me. Reading them provided therapy for my siblings. Much of my heroine's inner doubts and struggles were mine. As were her victories.

The ghosts and murders are just for fun.

Haunting Megan is available for pre-order at iBooks (http://bit.ly/HauntingMeganiBooks) and at Amazon (http://bit.ly/HauntingMeganAmazon)
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Published on July 30, 2014 17:49 • 555 views • Tags: abuse, alcoholism, ghost, haunting-megan, healing
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message 1: by Carrie (new)

Carrie Chwierut Love how you incorporate real life into your books. The good, bad and the ugly. All of it can help someone else going through the same situation. Kudos!


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