The Coin Update

There are people who think I find coins because I am looking down all the time. However, the reality is that I [image error]never found coins until after my dad died eight years ago which is part of the reason I have felt so strongly that they are left by him. And in the two months or so since I stopped picking them up, I continue to see them, mostly pointing them out to my boyfriend Greg if he is with me. Last week I saw pennies multiple times: one in the dirt at Cleveland High School between the stadiumn and tennis courts where we had gone to play tennis and three at Hurricane's where we went for breakfast on Sunday. 

Part of me still feels strange not picking them up but I had decided several months ago that I felt a little silly doing it now. My life has undergone huge changes, continually evolving in front of me, over these eight years since my dad died. I can't express how much I needed those coins during that time. They were the symbolism that held me together some days, the reminder from my dad (someone who was not very happily present in life here on earth) that he was still with me, that he supported me, and that everything would fall together again. While life isn't perfect, some major good changes took place this year (I'll be writing more about them on my birthday next week, December 12) and I don't sense the need to have the coins physically in my hands right now. I feel as if I am to leave them for someone else to pick up.