Wisdom and Dad’s Advice
I’ve made plenty of decisions over the years that lacked wisdom. In short, many were just plain stupid! And I’m certain that where the decisions of my youth are concerned that dad would agree. But this one takes the cake.
“I want to quit,” I said bluntly.
My wife just stared at me, impervious to what I was suggesting; quitting a supervisory job at a local hospital. I know that sounds terrible, but at the time it made since. You see, like many RN’s, I was holding down two jobs.
I really enjoyed my second job, and dreaded going to my supervisory job. The only rotten thing is that my second job, a PRN (as needed help) position, didn’t offer a set reliable schedule.
“Are you sure about this?” she asked doubtfully.
“I’m pretty sure. I hate going up there and I miss getting to work in the Emergency Room. Besides, my ER manager thinks that when the new hospital opens there will be an increase in volume necessitating more nurses.”
“Do you think you can get enough shifts in the ER to get us by for a year?” She asked.
I’m quite certain by the expression on her face, she thought she had me cornered. But I was dead set on my decision.
“I’m sure. I only need eight shifts a month to cover our bills.”
“But it’s another year till the new hospital opens.”
“I know. And we have plenty in savings. We can get by. Besides, the reward is I get to do something I like, work ten minutes from home, and be a part of a group of people I am proud to work with.”
“Alright,” she replied with an unsettling sigh. “What are you going to do with your free time?”
I shrugged. “Try and self-publish one of these books,” I replied.
She didn’t say much about it, though she did smile and nod along. The idea of publishing wasn’t knew. I had started writing back in high school and made efforts to get published shortly after we were married, though none were successful.
Fast forward one year and I can say in all honesty that the past year since I made my decision, things hadn’t been all that easy. Some months produced more than the required shifts and others produced less. But it did even out in the end, and things moved along with The Apprentice being published to Amazon’s Kindle platform.
But I was getting worried. My boss at the hospital told me with infinite wisdom to just be patient. But I couldn’t help it. I was nervous and beginning to doubt if the right opportunity would come available. Looking back, I’m quite certain that she already knew, but I couldn’t be for sure. And so when the job opportunities were finally posted I let out a great sigh of relief.
Shortly after accepting one of those opportunities, I returned home to tell my wife.
“It worked out,” I said simply.
“What?”
“More positions have opened up and when the new hospital opens in August one of them is mine.”
And that’s when the disaster part of this story hit. My wife clued me in on a financial mishap that, without the help of my father, would have broken us completely. It was entirely unexpected, and barring the gritty details, I’ll just say that we are getting through it.
The real difficulty for me has been in dealing with the situation. And among the many feelings I have had about it, regret and thankfulness rank near the top. Regret for having to ask for help; I like to do things my way and on my own steam. And thankfulness for having family, mine and hers, willing to pitch in and help us in our time of need.
Still, I couldn’t help but think that had I not left my supervisory job, this financial mishap may not have hit us so hard. And it made me think about a whole slew of decision I’ve made over a twenty year period that I now seemed wrought of poor wisdom.
So when I went to visit my parents recently, I brought the subject up with my dad. “You know. It seems like the past twenty years I’ve made a lot of not so good choices,” I said.
In light of the current circumstances I fully expected him to agree with me. He didn’t. In fact, he said something that forced me to re-evaluate everything I’ve done up to this point in life.
Dad said, “There are no bad decisions as long as you learn from every one you make.”
As it turns out, he’s right. The supervisory job was a handful of drudgery that pulled me from my family and the things I enjoy most in life. In fact, it interfered for several months with me working at the Emergency Room. And had I not made, what in hindsight looks like a bad decision, I would not now be a staff member working with an incredible group of physicians, nurses, and administrators at a brand new hospital!
And while things are a little tough now, they are already on the upswing. And that’s where dad’s second line of wisdom comes into play, “Keep moving forward and quit worrying about the past.” For me that line roughly translated to a simple zen proverb I read some years ago, “Live only in the present.”
So like Artamos from “The Apprentice” I’ve made a decision to keep moving forward with my life’s mission to care and provide for my family.
My second book, “Rogue: The Streets of Caltania” is in its final edits. I had hopes to release it by the end of August. But as you can expect from this post, I’ve been a little derailed over the past month and a half. So it may be closer to October before it is finally released. In the meantime, download “The Apprentice.” It’s a short read, but it’s free, and it’s a great way to experience my writing style without any monetary commitment.
Free!
