The Hazards Of Writing

Unusually for me lately, I had a very productive morning. Until a couple of hours ago that is. Here I sat, minding my own business, and contemplating what gem of great knowledge or insight to share with my friends, as I do, when one of the horde scored a direct hit on my right eyeball with a chunk of extra spicy hot chilli beef. I don’t eat beef so I’m not all that keen on having a bit inserted into any sort of facial orifice anyway, but I can assure you that having a bit of Scotch Bonnet chilli adhering to your cornea is no walk in the park either. After much yelling, swearing, and pouring of milk into my by then raisin-like part, I had to hang around on the couch for a bit before I could see straight again. Obviously the solicitous horde stayed with me throughout before heading back to their carnivore lunch. I’m thinking now of having the rest of the evening off from computering today. There’s only so much you can do to an eyeball in one day really. So.

To those people who think that writing isn’t a difficult and hazardous profession I say… Well… Apart from the possible painful calluses to the buttock area, you have all sorts of writing related physical ailments that could come your way. If you don’t do at least twelve minutes (yes – twelve) of vigorous physical exercise every day, you could develop an unsightly protrusion around your naval area. Then you have the thing you get from fiddling with the mouse all day and banging away at your keyboard – where your thumb goes all dead for weeks on end. Then there’s frozen kneecaps, squished lower vertebrae and all sorts of other torments to dodge. There are many more dangers to innocent writers that my one tightly closed eyeball slightly puts me off from having to type right now. All I can say to my fellow scribblers today is – stay safe guys, stay safe.

Till next time friends. xxx