Shaking Up Your Routine Can Spice Up Your Marriage
Conventional wisdom says: “marriage takes work.” But, what if we told you that there’s another ingredient to a long, lasting, and happy marriage—one that’s a lot more fun. According to new research, happy relationships need the element of surprise.
The researchers who conducted the 15-year study recently highlighted in the New York Times, found that simply doing a new little activity with your spouse can have a positive effect on your mood. As the Times reports:
Surprise is a potent force. When something novel occurs, we tend to pay attention, to appreciate the experience or circumstance, and to remember it. We are less likely to take our marriage for granted when it continues to deliver strong emotional reactions in us. Also, uncertainty sometimes enhances the pleasure of positive events.
That’s why scientists theorize that newly empty-nesters experience the same “happiness bump” as newlyweds. Once again, they begin to learn new things about one another. And those surprises can reignite the thrill of love once more.
But, even if the kids are still at home, you can still experience the benefits of novelty. Simple activities like visiting a place you’ve never been, going out dancing, playing a new sport together can have the same effects. And science proves it. As the Times explains, a well-known study by Arthur Aaron found that the couples who engaged in the exciting new activities together reported greater satisfaction in their marriage than those who engaged in pleasant or familiar ones.
In other words: don’t get stuck in a rut! While there is certainly comfort in a familiar routine, a good marriage can get even better when you inject it with a little something new together. So, what better excuse to get small and get going? You and your spouse just might surprise each other when you break out of your routine.
The researchers who conducted the 15-year study recently highlighted in the New York Times, found that simply doing a new little activity with your spouse can have a positive effect on your mood. As the Times reports:
Surprise is a potent force. When something novel occurs, we tend to pay attention, to appreciate the experience or circumstance, and to remember it. We are less likely to take our marriage for granted when it continues to deliver strong emotional reactions in us. Also, uncertainty sometimes enhances the pleasure of positive events.
That’s why scientists theorize that newly empty-nesters experience the same “happiness bump” as newlyweds. Once again, they begin to learn new things about one another. And those surprises can reignite the thrill of love once more.
But, even if the kids are still at home, you can still experience the benefits of novelty. Simple activities like visiting a place you’ve never been, going out dancing, playing a new sport together can have the same effects. And science proves it. As the Times explains, a well-known study by Arthur Aaron found that the couples who engaged in the exciting new activities together reported greater satisfaction in their marriage than those who engaged in pleasant or familiar ones.
In other words: don’t get stuck in a rut! While there is certainly comfort in a familiar routine, a good marriage can get even better when you inject it with a little something new together. So, what better excuse to get small and get going? You and your spouse just might surprise each other when you break out of your routine.
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