When Did Shit Get Cool?

Literally, when did the censors decide that the word ‘shit’ was totally kosher?

 

A few weeks back, I was catching up on this show I got addicted to. With no shame whatsoever, I will admit it was the show “Lost Girl” on the Sci-Fi channel. What can I say? I’m a total sucker for lesbian fairies with magical powers that also kick ass. Anywho, there I was, watching the show in complete fascination (mainly because it’s good, but also because I was kind of stoned) when one of the main characters dropped the s-bomb. No bleeping. No voice over. Just dropped ‘shit’ into a sentence like it was nothing. The she did it again, and again, and again. She used it as a noun. “I don’t give a shit.” Used it as an adverb. “I’m tired of your shitty attitude.” Used it as a simple exclamation. “Shit!”

I immediately pulled out my cell phone so I could call my ex and see if hell had frozen over. He told me it hadn’t, and then reminded me of the restraining order, so I hung up.

I brushed it off as a fluke, assuming that that naughty little show had gotten away with something amazing. Then, it happened on another show on another network and I realized that that rules had changed.

The censors had apparently decided that ‘shit’ was ok.

Here’s the thing. I used to work in corporate America, so I know how this shit works. Someone didn’t just say, ‘ok, shit is officially ok to say on network television now.” No, they had to have meetings. They had to have charts and graphs and statistics and studies done. In my head, I was picturing a pie graph, with colored segments reserved for ‘fuck,’ ‘cock’, ‘pussy’ and ‘shit’. Then, I pictured a group of business men sitting in a conference room, watching a Power Point presentation and having a conversation that went a lot like this;

 

The Boss: I’ve taken a look at the statistics, and apparently our focus group did not like pussy. They were mildly intrigued by cock, but they didn’t give a shit about shit. Thad, how do you feel about their reaction to pussy?

Thad: Of course they don’t like pussy! Did you see those pussies?

Mike: Hey, I’m offended. I don’t like pussy either.

Thad: Of course not. You prefer cock! But we’re not talking about cock. We’re talking about pussy.

Mike: I will admit that I love cock, but I also want to know if fuck is completely off the table?

Thad: Well, I like cock, but I love pussy. I’m not crazy about fuck though. What about shit?

Mike: What shit?

Thad: How do we feel about shit?

Mike: About what shit? I already told you, I like cock. You like pussy. I think we need to agree to disagree.

Thad: Fine, but I don’t agree to fuck though. Not with you there. I’ll stick to pussy.

Mike: And I’ll stick to cock.

The Boss: Now gentleman, we can all agree that we love cock and pussy. However, the focus group did not like either and they certainly hated fucking. Now how do we feel about shit?

Thad: What shit?

The Boss: Their feelings about shit. How do we feel about shit?

Thad: (throws up his hands) I don’t give a fuck!

Mike: I still love cock!

The Boss: Well, we’re certainly not giving them any fucks, but we might be able to give them Mike’s cock.  However, I think we can all agree that no one gives a shit about shit.

Thad: (shaking his head sadly) Then its shit then.

Mike: I prefer cock.

The Boss: Shit.

 

Anyway, in my own twisted little head, this is how I imagine that the conversation went. However, I have to admit I’m a little annoyed. Not over the censorship thing. I’m not a big fan of censorship. I’m a little annoyed over what is ok, and what’s not. Think about it. Shit, a disgusting word that describes a disgusting process. Then fuck, a rough word that describes a really fun process. How the hell is shit better than fuck? I’d take a fuck over a shit any day of the week, and I’m sure most people would as well.