The things that are happening

This is one of those "sorry I haven't been blogging for a week or longer" roundup posts. I first was too tired after GRL (post on that might be forthcoming), then I was busy (getting coverage with my post in USA Today), and then I've had to deal with a big disappointment, and attended some workshops. Actually, I'll be gone again for four days starting tomorrow.

First things first. From 31 October for a whole week, I'll be donating $1 per sold book to the Red Cross involved in disaster relief following Sandy. Because it's very difficult (actually in some cases impossible) to track my sales with some publishers (certainly not by date), and because I don't receive royalties at all from some releases, I'll have to limit this to my recent work published at Riptide - which also guarantees that I'm actually making a dollar (or more) on sales of my books. I'll top up the total amount to a nice, round number. So if you're missing Skybound, Dark Soul #1-5, Incursion, or Gold Digger, this is a good moment to read a book for charity. :)

Other stuff going on threw me for a loop. It's always hard to be disappointed in people, but it's worse if somebody I thought I knew has consistently spread lies and taken advantage of my friends. I tend to assume the best of people, and then I get jolted back to earth. The best thing to do with an emotional vampire and a social predator is to cut them off entirely - no attention, no money, no support, and no tears.

It doesn't help that I feel bad for having been duped and for not believing something that I'd been seeing with my own eyes. Generally speaking, it'll make me more cautious about certain types of behaviour. I'd previously encountered exactly two compulsive liars in my life, and both played that particular game so well that they destroyed lives and people's self-worth, so there's always the possibility that they are actually sociopaths/narcissists.

The good thing is, I spotted this early enough in example number three to stay way clear before any more damage happened, but that doesn't make things any more pleasant to deal with. I hope there's healing/therapy for the person and their victims. Here's me being optimistic again: I do think that even compulsive liars, people celebrating a martyr/victim complex, people lying about their needs and frailties for sympathy and money/gifts, people who take advantage of other people for months and years and then badmouthing them to everybody who will hear/believe, people misrepresenting everybody they've been in contact with - that even those people can change and improve and possibly even see what damage they do and even make amends.

Yeah.

Optimist = me.

Writing hasn't been happening, but right now, I'm pretty much at peace with that. I've done a spot of plotting and a bit of research, but my focus right now is the big piece of work happening in my garden (they've laid three patios and have completed quite a bit of hard landscaping, so I can see the shape of future things), the workshops I'm attending in London (next one: Friday to Monday), and re-thinking and re-evaluating some things in the past and future (never mind the present). Personal growth more than creative growth. Things are piling up all around me, but I'm less anxious about it, which actually makes me more productive.

As I think, the day job is getting seriously old. I do like being part of a team. Here though, there is no team. I don't feel particularly valued, and I don't see anything happening that they promised me at the interview (yeah, newsflash - I did say I was an optimist, but I think we can now upgrade that to "gullible"). However, with all the banks kicking out investment banking staff (one of my ex-colleagues at Previous Place has just been fired), I'm stuck here for at least another year, possibly two. Best I can do is try for a move inside the same company or at least cut the time I spend physically in the office. There aren't really any jobs but maternity cover and temp jobs, and I do like some security, and the benefits here are nice.

Maybe the overall mood will improve once November is gone, and all the thinking I'm doing yields some results. Maybe I should throw myself into some random, NaNoWriMo project, getting too busy to do all that heavy thinking. I *will* have to get back into the birds book to have anything to sell, and after all the work and effort, I'd simply hate to lose it or give up.
19 likes ·   •  8 comments  •  flag
Share on Twitter
Published on November 01, 2012 05:34
Comments Showing 1-8 of 8 (8 new)    post a comment »
dateUp arrow    newest »

message 1: by Kaje (new)

Kaje Harper Best of luck for November. Meeting you at GRL was a highlight.

I hope the job situation works out for you. And I think there is nothing wrong with being an optimist (as one to another.) Being positive most of the time, with inevitable times of disappointment, beats being worried and pessimistic most of the time with moments of being pleased you're wrong, in my book.


message 2: by Taylor (new)

Taylor That's really kind of you to donate to the hurricane victims, and I'll be sure to pick up Dark Soul this week.

I'm sorry you were hurt by someone you trusted. It happens to the best of us. I don't believe that being optimistic makes you gullible or naive though, just human. Who wants to carry around the weight of cynicism and suspicion everywhere they go? Those are the people I really feel sorry for.

I do hope things start looking up for you soon. Take care of yourself! *tight hugs*


message 3: by BlackTulip (new)

BlackTulip Great post on USA Today, best of luck and a BIG hug

*^_^*


message 4: by Vivian (new)

Vivian Oh dear...sorry to hear about the breach in trust. I tend to be a more guarded person allowing few opportunities for true betrayal, but the devastation you're experiencing--I empathize.

Being a cynical idealist, I find optimists to be the bright shiny things that create glows in ordinary life. So don't think of it as "gullible", but choosing to live to a set of beliefs. That said, I hope to heck you have people around you who protect and support you.

Now, back to my selfish interests--no writing? Quelle horreur! This needs to be changed. Pronto! I've got maybe 3-4 months of your backlist remaining. Chop...chop.

I'll be sure to pick up the books I'm missing. You really are a sweet person.


message 5: by Vivian (new)

Vivian Stockpiling my books :)
Three more onto the pile though I don't think I can read one of them until after my buddy read of Special Forces *deep SIGH


message 6: by JR (new)

JR Every day is a learning experience. It would be wonderful if all those experiences could be good ones, but they make us who we are. If lessons are learned then something good came out of it. Optimistic/gullible = you, me. Good adjectives. You seem to be a kind and loving person. I'm glad since it is reflected in your writing.

A garden is a wonderful place. I hope it brings you much happiness. As for jobs, well, my ambition was to always work at something I loved. It's only happened a couple of times. That's okay because the money I make brings me pleasure in the form of purchasing/reading books. Somewhere that equals out for me.


message 7: by Darkm (new)

Darkm I'm not only very sorry to read about the breach in your trust, but I also understand you completely.
Not being able to judge people well it happened to me more than once to trust the wrong person, and it really hurt.
Optimist me hopes they'll realize their mistakes and make amends. Cynic me thinks they probably never will.
More than anything I hate that they seem to know exactly whose people to prey upon.

I think donating for the hurricane Sandy is a wonderful thing :) and I'm wishing you best of luck, both with hoping your work will get more interesting, and with your Muse coming back to you.


Alex is The Romance Fox Hey A....it's good that you still see the fabulous things around you....and i feel for you...when you are faced with a loss of faith and trust...hits you, smacks you pretty hard...my way of dealing with it....

I try as much as possible to believe the best of everybody…..much easier to do that, don’t you think. And deep down I still believe that people are intrinsically good....otherwise I would be going crazy…imagine thinking the worst before the better……

Now, in my philosophical “moment”, I leave you with the words of an extraordinary man…..
― Plato

“When men speak ill of thee, live so that nobody will believe them.”

“People are like dirt. They can either nourish you and help you grow as a person or they can stunt your growth and make you wilt and die.”

“An empty vessel makes the loudest sound, so they that have the least wit are the greatest babblers.”

Have a great evening and KEEP WRITING....I love your storytelling!!!!!

ps is it snowing over there???? Hot and sunny most days...but geez did we have a SHORT ...and I mean short...afternoon storm....
ciao


back to top

Letters from the Front

Aleksandr Voinov
Aleksandr Voinov's blog on reading and writing. ...more
Follow Aleksandr Voinov's blog with rss.