If I'm Reading The Bible, Is This The Sue-Pocalypse?

Christiane Amanpour said her favorite character as a child was Jo from Little Women, so I started re-reading that*… then I had to look up Pilgrim's Progress** and the next thing I knew I was downloading the Bible*** to my iPhone. My Mardi Gras outing had been canceled so I settled in with Genesis.

At the risk of a lightning strike, I have to say that God sounds like, well, kind of mean-spirited. He made us; he messes with us. He toyed with Cain by rejecting his offering. He wiped the...