How to Avoid Gillian at Conflux
This is my annual guide on the avoidance of Gillian at Conflux.
The usual rules apply: if you want chocolate you absolutely don't want to avoid her; if you want to know where to buy specialist foodstuffs, you want to actively seek her out; if you want truly bad jokes, you shouldn't avoid her. If you need coffee late at night, she can be persuaded into making it (and maybe serving home made liqueur alongside) in return for a simple lift home. For all other forms of avoidance and non-avoidance, here is a simple guide* gently expressed in the first person, to make it seem as if Gillian is real and not a figment of chocolate overload:
Friday 28 September 2-4 pm
A two hour workshop on History in your Fiction. There are still places available. I don't know why there are still places available, for this is the stuff I've been researching for the last whatever and I have worked out some amazing shortcuts and easy ways for writers to understand what they're doing. Also, I don't know when I'll be teaching this subject in Canberra again. (I shall be spending summer finally doing solid work on the book on the subject, I suspect, but that is not at all relevant to Conflux). Also, people who go to this workshop get the best chocolate, for I got some specially to celebrate that all my ideas came together so very neatly. (In other words, cutting edge research! With chocolate!)
Saturday 29 September
1-2 pm How to write prophecies. I'm chairing this and plan to do evil things to my poor, innocent panellists.
2-3 pm panel on apocalypses, chaired by Cat Sparks. I want to talk about roosters, I suspect.
4-5 pm Kaffeeklatsche - again with Cat Sparks. Poor Cat - she has to endure me!
7 pm Smiths bookshop - Ms Cellophane relaunched, along with four much better books being launched for the first time.
Sunday 30 September
10 am possibility of readings. CSFG readings will happen, whether they include me or not is still to be decided.
3.15-4.15 Time travel panel!
And I can't remember if I'm in the great debate or not, so avoid it to be safe. Or don't avoid it and just avoid eye contact. Or be brazen about the whole thing and ask me for chocolate, whether I'm in the audience or elsewhere.
*By 'simple' I ought to explain that today is a day for wittering and so this guide is infected with witter and not as pithy as usual.
The usual rules apply: if you want chocolate you absolutely don't want to avoid her; if you want to know where to buy specialist foodstuffs, you want to actively seek her out; if you want truly bad jokes, you shouldn't avoid her. If you need coffee late at night, she can be persuaded into making it (and maybe serving home made liqueur alongside) in return for a simple lift home. For all other forms of avoidance and non-avoidance, here is a simple guide* gently expressed in the first person, to make it seem as if Gillian is real and not a figment of chocolate overload:
Friday 28 September 2-4 pm
A two hour workshop on History in your Fiction. There are still places available. I don't know why there are still places available, for this is the stuff I've been researching for the last whatever and I have worked out some amazing shortcuts and easy ways for writers to understand what they're doing. Also, I don't know when I'll be teaching this subject in Canberra again. (I shall be spending summer finally doing solid work on the book on the subject, I suspect, but that is not at all relevant to Conflux). Also, people who go to this workshop get the best chocolate, for I got some specially to celebrate that all my ideas came together so very neatly. (In other words, cutting edge research! With chocolate!)
Saturday 29 September
1-2 pm How to write prophecies. I'm chairing this and plan to do evil things to my poor, innocent panellists.
2-3 pm panel on apocalypses, chaired by Cat Sparks. I want to talk about roosters, I suspect.
4-5 pm Kaffeeklatsche - again with Cat Sparks. Poor Cat - she has to endure me!
7 pm Smiths bookshop - Ms Cellophane relaunched, along with four much better books being launched for the first time.
Sunday 30 September
10 am possibility of readings. CSFG readings will happen, whether they include me or not is still to be decided.
3.15-4.15 Time travel panel!
And I can't remember if I'm in the great debate or not, so avoid it to be safe. Or don't avoid it and just avoid eye contact. Or be brazen about the whole thing and ask me for chocolate, whether I'm in the audience or elsewhere.
*By 'simple' I ought to explain that today is a day for wittering and so this guide is infected with witter and not as pithy as usual.
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