The Impossible Dream

I have a problem with the heroic. To me the Arthurian ideal seems to have been coopted by late stage capitalism to the point where it now means success at any cost and a go-big-or-go-home mentality that I see afflicting us at all turns.

My purpose here is to foster an understanding and a cultivation of the prosaic and merely organic it terms of theme and content and as such to stand against the possible annihilation of not just the heroic, but also the human in our lifetimes, both in biological and cultural terms. That might seem melodramatic and self-promoting, and maybe it is. But there’s a good chance that it’s not. Read on and make up your minds.

I know that’s not enough for some of you so I have decided that in the interests of serving this constituency and giving it what it seems to want, I will try and make it easier by signaling up front what could be understood as useful with certain posts. Notice I didn’t say breaking into sub groups or chats or any such organizational fal-de-da. Just simply an up front capitulation to specialized interest, while not losing the focus on the preferred readership seeking authenticity and real life cogitations. For instance with this post:

This post concerns the travails of self-publishing, with sidelong glimpses, hopefully not envious, at the dangers of artificial intelligence, and a dash, just a dash of moralizing that will serve as a vaccination against pretentiousness. Does that work?

But anyway, indulge me. As you know I just finished a book called Alias Tomorrow and am in the midst of developing a long term marketing plan which I am committing to various spreadsheets very likely to peter out in the first blasts of colder weather.

When to my surprise, I received this week in the inbox an email that seemed prescient and uplifting along those very lines.

Dear Anthony Caplan,

Yet Today is one of the most introspective novels I’ve read in a while. Gillum Kaosky’s summer, shifting from the monotony of a Spanish teacher’s life to wire-tapping Dominican crime families, drew me in immediately. The way you uncover secret links between his eavesdropped lives and his own unraveling world hit me hard. Your raw portrayal of his family’s struggles made every page feel achingly real.

I especially liked the emotional tension between Gillum’s quiet observations and the chaos of his son Jonah’s hacking scandal and his wife Sibyl’s discovery of his texts. The faculty meeting scene, dripping with mundane frustration, was a standout for me. I was always waiting for the next glimpse into Gillum’s mind. Your vivid take on life’s small disappointments, woven with profound insights on suffering and solidarity, added such a poignant depth to the story.

This book has the bones of a reflective favorite something readers discover and talk about. I’d love to chat if you’re open to finding ways to help Yet Today reach more of the audience it’s made for.

Warm regards,

Kathleen

Of course this warmed my heart. Here someone had obviously read my book, written and published a few years ago to little fanfare and quick oblivion, loved it for its special literary qualities, and wanted to help publicize its merits to a wider audience. How fantastic, right? Especially since Alias Tomorrow shares some of the same family themes and could almost be a sequel of sorts. I went back and looked at the book’s listings. Not many sold in the last couple of years. A handful. Maybe ten copies including some free Kindles in a giveaway.

Maybe it was time to do some promotion for Yet Today and think about that as a way to launch the new book. I don’t generally have a budget for hiring out this kind of work, but maybe I could dredge some up and face the wife’s likely and well-deserved wrath at sinking good money in a fruitless cause. That was my line of thinking.

But then this caught my eye:

KIRKUS REVIEWS

A New Hampshire high school teacher, working a second job as a Drug Enforcement Agency linguist, feels disconnected from his family in Caplan’s (The Saints of David, 2017, etc.) novel. Gillum Kaosky, who teaches Spanish during the school year, has no plans for recreation during the summer. Instead, he’s lined up a job with the DEA tapping phone calls between Dominican drug-gang members. Kaosky lives with wife, Sibyl, and daughters, Hope and Gabriella; his son, Jonah, is away at university. He has few acquaintances, and his students’ parents don’t seem to recognize him at school events such as Hope’s lacrosse game. He’s not popular at work, either; the school principal insinuates that he should go easier on a star athlete in his class. However, he feels most isolated within his own family. He doesn’t relate well to his daughters, and during one of Jonah’s visits, the family seems happier when Kaosky isn’t with them. But two events cause the protagonist to see an opportunity to reconnect and make his world “whole again.” Caplan establishes an unhurried pace for a story that focuses largely on Kaosky’s self-analysis. Though flawed, the protagonist is sympathetic as he struggles to overcome his faults and make others happy. There are notable parallels between the Milares family, whom Kaosky monitors, and his own kin. The story often highlights how he’s become an observer, rather than an active participant, in his own life. Caplan displays an ability to turn somber moments into something heartfelt. An often bleak tale with an intriguing, introspective protagonist.

I’ve highlighted the keyword from this review, which caught my eye the first time I read it, largely because I thought at the time that it was unmerited. I mean, does any first person narrator count as introspective because he or she is telling their own story? Not really.

Okay, maybe it touched a nerve. But that entire review seemed mean-spirited at the time. And then Kathleen’s email echoes the word in the first line, and I thought — that’s weird.

An introspective novel. I like the concept, though. I just needed to find out more:

Hi Kathleen,

Tell me more about yourself. Where did you read Yet Today? How can you help it reach a wider audience?

I must tell you I have another novel that I am gearing up to publish and launch in the fall so any budget I have will most likely be very small.

The response was not long in coming. An hour and a half later:

Wed, Jun 4, 8:59 AM (3 days ago)

Dear Anthony,

Thank you for your kind words about my enthusiasm for Yet Today! I discovered your novel on Reedsy Discovery and Amazon, where its gripping premise caught my attention. I’m truly excited about the potential to bring this incredible story to a wider audience.

I’m a book enthusiast with a strong background in social media marketing, and I’ve worked with numerous authors who have been delighted with the results of my promotional efforts. They’ve often expressed joy at seeing their books gain traction, spark discussions, and reach new readers through tailored campaigns. I’d love to promote Yet Today across platforms like TikTok, Goodreads, Amazon, and Reedsy Discovery, where vibrant book communities can amplify its reach. For TikTok, we could create short, captivating videos highlighting Gillum’s emotional journey or the tension of his double life, designed to engage the #BookTok crowd. On Goodreads and Reedsy Discovery, we could encourage reader reviews and use targeted posts to build buzz within literary circles, emphasizing the novel’s introspective depth and themes of family and struggle. On Amazon, we could optimize the book’s listing with targeted keywords and encourage reviews to boost visibility.

It went on. But the first line is a little strange, isn’t it? Thanks for your words about my enthusiasm? I’m starting to get a Hal from 2001 kind of vibe. And Kathleen looks like central casting, long dark hair and uber friendly. But I’m still hopeful, so I dive in, thinking at the least I can learn something for myself.

*Pro tip - I often do this on house projects — I get a consultation from a pro before diving into a DIY project to confirm or unconfirm some of my biases. Knowing nothing or almost nothing about book marketing circa 2025, maybe “Kathleen” can teach me something.

Hi Kathleen,

Any budget that I have is limited. However, I do believe that a cross-promotion could work, particularly since Alias Tomorrow shares so much in common with Yet Today that their readership should be complimentary. It's not a sequel but it could be. Let me share the pitch I have for Alias Tomorrow.

Alias Tomorrow, 74,202 words, is a work that interweaves contemporary and science fiction to explore themes of family and the struggle for connection in a rapidly changing world.

The scaffold story centers on William Morrow, a once-celebrated writer now grappling with the harsh realities of personal setbacks. As the Christmas season descends, his adult children return to the family home, each carrying their own burdens and unresolved conflicts.

Morrow is writing a book. Set on a colonized Mars in the year 2148, Alias Tomorrow follows Antioch, an Earthling political prisoner who has been rehabilitated as an analyst for the oppressive OneWorld government. Antioch's existence is a delicate balancing act: he yearns for the Earth he can never return to, yet he clings to the fragile stability he's found on Mars.

The two stories illuminate each other in surprising ways, blurring the lines between reality and fiction, and raising profound questions about the nature of storytelling, the power of memory, and the enduring human need for connection. As William delves deeper into his epic narrative, he begins to see parallels between Antioch's existential struggles and his own, forcing him to confront uncomfortable truths he has long avoided.
Alias Tomorrow is at once a suspenseful exploration of a society where advanced technology has blurred the lines between reality and illusion, and a character-driven, unflinchingly honest expose of the inner lives of an American family.

Alias Tomorrow explores the complexities of family dynamics and the search for meaning in a present that often feels fragmented and isolating. It contains within it the picture of an interplanetary future where personal victories are hard-won against a system designed to crush dissent. The combined effect of this dual story is a thought-provoking and emotionally resonant reading experience.

I am the author of six previous self-published novels with more than 17,000 print and ebooks in the hands of readers. I have worked as a journalist and a teacher and am currently a state representative in the New Hampshire legislature.

I would be interested in what you think about how a cross-promotion could work.

Regards,

In less than two hours this came back:

MARKETING PROPOSAL FOR YET TODAY AND ALIAS TOMORROWPrepared by Kathleen R. GarnerClient: Anthony CaplanOBJECTIVETo amplify visibility and long-tail engagement for Yet Today while strategically introducing Alias Tomorrow through audience-building platforms like TikTok, Goodreads, and curated teaser content. This campaign aims to connect your books with the literary and sci-fi communities most likely to respond to their emotional weight, philosophical undercurrents, and dual-focus narratives.STRATEGIC OVERVIEWWe will focus on the following reader segments:

Literary fiction lovers drawn to introspective, character-driven novels

Sci-fi fans who appreciate grounded speculative elements and layered themes

Book communities across TikTok (#BookTok), Goodreads, and Reddit

Readers who engage with themes of family unraveling, identity, and psychological depth

Influencers and reviewers aligned with books like The Overstory, Station Eleven, and The Left Hand of Darkness

Our approach is to build connections through storytelling not just promote a book, but show how Yet Today and Alias Tomorrow resonate with the human condition.PROPOSED CROSS-PROMOTION CAMPAIGN — $800 BUDGETDuration: 4 weeks however I suggest we do the promotion for two month (8-weeks) for maximum impactGoal: Drive discoverability, reviews, and organic growth through content-driven marketing.CORE ELEMENTS & BENEFITSTikTok Promotion (BookTok)Deliverables:

2 TikTok/Instagram video reels using licensed audio and on-trend hashtags

Storyboarded to highlight Yet Today’s emotional tension (e.g., Gillum’s secret world vs. family unraveling)

A teaser for Alias Tomorrow (William Morrow writing Antioch’s story) emphasizing sci-fi/lit crossover

Influencer outreach (3–4 micro-creators who focus on literary or hybrid fiction)

Benefits:TikTok is now one of the biggest book discovery platforms. Emotional, voiceover-based reels can trigger viral shares. Even smaller videos often lead to spikes in Goodreads shelves and Amazon searches. Using trending music and visual storytelling hooks readers emotionally essential for a book like Yet Today with psychological depth. TikTok also builds visibility for Alias Tomorrow before launch, letting early audiences invest in your voice.Goodreads Listopia PlacementDeliverables:

Strategic placement in 6–8 Goodreads Listopia lists such as:

“Books That Stay With You”

“Literary Fiction with a Psychological Twist”

“Dual Timeline Books”

“Speculative Fiction Grounded in Reality”

Encouraging reader voting and Listopia ranking increases

Benefits:Listopia placement significantly increases visibility to readers actively browsing for their next read. It’s passive discovery that keeps working: books on Listopia get seen repeatedly, especially when lists gain upvotes or circulate via Goodreads’ algorithms. For Yet Today, this drives recognition as a reflective, “hidden gem.” For Alias Tomorrow, it builds anticipation on lists like “Most Anticipated Indie Sci-Fi” or “Fiction Set on Mars.”Custom Video Teaser TrailerDeliverables:

1 cinematic-style teaser video (30–45 seconds) featuring:

Atmospheric music

On-screen quotes from Yet Today or early blurbs

Visual parallels between Gillum and William/Antioch

Text motion graphics highlighting themes: isolation, memory, redemption

Benefits:Video trailers evoke a visceral first impression. Viewers retain emotional story cues far more strongly with sound and movement than static images alone. This format brings a professional edge, helping your novels stand out against the wave of flat promos. It can be repurposed across multiple platforms and used in ad campaigns or newsletters.ADDITIONAL COMPONENTS

Quote Graphic: A designed image featuring a powerful line from Yet Today, for posting and boosting

VALUE SUMMARYThis campaign maximizes your $800 budget by focusing on content that builds relationships, not just quick clicks. Every element, videos, lists, reviews keeps working long after the campaign ends. By spotlighting Yet Today now and seeding awareness for Alias Tomorrow, we’re building a continuum of readership between books.Looking forward to collaborating and helping bring both stories to the readers they’re meant for. shall we proceed to the next step?Warm regards,

Wow, a lot to learn in there. I’m reading it through, starting taking notes, the spreadsheet is growing like weeds. About half an hour later I get these two frantic emails:

Kathleen R. GarnerJun 6, 2025, 9:25 AM (1 day ago)

Should i proceed to issue the contract now on Upwork,starting now will give the book the high chance of being selected, because the beginning of the month is when potential readers are always in-search of the book to read, let's start the promotion now to rank the book well for visibility and to increase its sales.

Kathleen R. GarnerJun 6, 2025, 10:14 AM (1 day ago)

Did you receive my message?

This is now the hallmark of a classic scam. Pressure to pull the trigger, do it now or it will go away. That well-known reader habit of choosing the book to read at the beginning of the month is happening now!

So now is when I think, lets scam the scammer. I love pulling their chains when I can, don’t you? They are usually so stupid. Just give them time and it will be clear. So I email back and say let’s chat, give me a call. Here’s my phone number. And get this response.

Dear Anthony,

Thank you again for your thoughtful engagement and for taking the time to review my proposal so thoroughly. I truly appreciate your openness and the dedication you show toward sharing Yet Today and Alias Tomorrow with the readers who are meant to find them.

While I’m currently unable to take calls, I absolutely understand that trust is essential in any creative collaboration, especially one that involves your hard work and passion. To help build that trust, I’d be glad to begin by asking three of my trusted reader-reviewers to read Yet Today and leave genuine, thoughtful, and positive reviews directly on your Goodreads page.

These will be real readers providing their honest impressions of the book, not generic or purchased reviews. Goodreads maintains a high standard and only publishes reviews that meet their authenticity guidelines, which ensures transparency for both authors and readers. Once these reviews are officially visible on your Goodreads listing, I believe they’ll offer a solid starting point to demonstrate my seriousness, integrity, and ability to connect your work with engaged literary audiences.

This initial step serves two important purposes:

It reinforces reader confidence and boosts credibility, as thoughtful Goodreads reviews influence new readers more than any advertisement.

It gives you a firsthand look at my approach rooted in genuine engagement and long-term reader connection rather than superficial promotion.

Once the reviews are live and verified, we can move forward with the promotional campaign and finalize payment. I truly believe in Yet Today’s emotional depth and power, and I would be honored to help it find the readers who need it.

Please let me know if this step feels right for you, and I’ll begin immediately with the reviewers.

Openly trolling at this point, I respond back that it’s strange because I never mentioned trust was an issue. just call me, I say, so we can hammer out the details. And get this huffiness:

I think i've justified the reason for not being able to take a call, can you place all questions here and i'll answer accordingly and know that your work will be done with professionalism and full details.

Just believe that your work will be done accordingly.

Yours truly.

Yours truly thjs time. Huh, a marked tone shift. I believe that’s a real human being behind the Kathleen Garner account. It’s a command. Just believe. Get in line sucker and do your job. This is the voice of a scammer, probably not a female even, I would say if pressed.

So I go fullbore myself.

Hi kathleen,

Could you arrange the two reader reviews you offered of Yet Today on Goodreads, and also send me a sample of a Tik Tok video you've made?

Since Alias Tomorrow is not on any sites yet, I'm not in a hurry to get started and so would rather make sure we are a good fit. Maybe a start by the end of this month.

Thanks and regards,

It’s late and the human is getting tired. Almost the final response of the night:

That mean you're going for the promotion for Yet Today?

I don’t answer. Let the hustler stew. One last email before bedtime.

They'll drop it tomorrow after they've finished reading the book.

This morning I get up and read this on the laptop:

Dear Anthony,

I wanted to let you know that we’ve officially started the project and I’m really excited about our first step. I’ve asked my readers to give the book three thoughtful, positive reviews and five-star ratings to help build early momentum.

We’re beginning by focusing on Goodreads, which has over 90 million active members who are actively looking for their next great read. Goodreads promotes books based on the number of ratings and reviews they receive, so this is a powerful way to start getting the visibility the book deserves.

I believe we can proceed now.

Kathleen.

About twelve hours. Fast work dear Kayla, Ava, and Emily. By the way, Ava, you bear an uncanny resemblance to Kathleen and your hand… It is either a man’s or you are really Sissy Hankshaw. Your other two friends are also obviously AI generated beauties. Thanks for your careful and thoughtful reviews, but no thanks.

Hi there,

I have a problem using AI-generated product in any of my work. In other words, I can't see myself relying on you to advance myself or market my books. It's probably illegal or ought to be.

Thanks, but no, I won't be pursuing this project any further.

So now I have two final thoughts. Have I outscammed myself? Should I have somehow contracted with Kathleen and gone ahead knowing full well that this is now just the way of the world? And if not, how can I justify keeping those three reviews on Goodreads? Is a little artifice okay or am I just fooling myself? It seems like a lose-lose proposition.

Kathleen, you win.