Monday Notes: Guest Interview on SA Speakeasy

Months ago, when I was healing from rotator cuff and bicep tendon surgery, all I could do for exercise was walk, and much of my entertainment included listening to an array of podcasts. During one of my morning walks, I came across SA speakeasy and an episode called, Female Sex and Love Addiction. The host, Roy Kim, a certified sex addiction therapist, spoke to Kim Hudson, another CSAT, about the rarely discussed topic of female sex addiction.

I listened to the episode with great interest and nodded in agreement with what Hudson had to say. Every time I come across scholarship about this subject, my life experience is affirmed, and this podcast was similar. At the end of episode 22, Roy Kim was intrigued and had more questions. I knew I could answer them. So, I made a note on my phone to reach out to him once I had an ARC version of In Search of a Salve.

July 12th, I constructed a thoughtful email.

July 20th, Roy responded with interest.

Roy read In Search of a Salve.

August 22nd, he and I recorded a podcast about the following subtopics:

The problem of sex addiction as largely viewed as a male issue.Men get away with a lot of things. Women not so much.The importance of identifying your emotions and sitting through it.Black men and women are taught to be strong, which then leads to emotional deafness.Unhealthy relationship patterns. Christians and their difficulty setting boundaries.Is God ashamed of those of us with sex addictions?What is it like to keep secrets and live a double life?Our bodies react to our traumas and our secrets.Being 40 but functioning like a hurt little 16-year-old.Kathy’s advice to women with sex addiction.

The conversation Roy and I had was one of the most heart-centered discussions I have had in…my…life, and I know that it was because he and I have the same goal—to help so-called minorities heal from this specific type of addiction.

I’m sharing this for a few reasons:

MESSAGE FOR EVERYONE

What I’ve described here is how publishing and marketing In Search of a Salve has been. I’ve felt aligned with the “right” people and experiences throughout the process. Initially, I was fearful about what readers would think and say, but responses have been affirming and loving. This is the type of energy I’ve not only craved in recovery, but also the kind of energy I need as I inch toward the release date. To say I’ve been grateful, would be an understatement.

MESSAGE FOR POTENTIAL READERS

Episode 24: In Search of a Salve (with K E Garland) will help you to determine if this book is something you want to read. If you are interested in my memoir but on the fence, the conversation that Roy and I had will help you to gain perspective on the types of subtopics the book elicits. Post-reading, the overall sentiment has been what an ARC reviewer said, you don’t have to be a sex addict, or an addict at all, to identify with this story. Our podcast convo shows this.

MESSAGE FOR INDIE AUTHORS

If you are an independent author, many experts will suggest that you market via cover reveals, blog tours, reviews, and social media campaigns. However, rarely have I seen experts suggest “doing press,” the way celebrities do when they have a new film, album, or book. We’re told to oversaturate the market like celebs, without the reach or the resources. Oftentimes marketing looks like shouting buy my book, buy my book, buy my book all over the place and to the wrong people. I’m suggesting you use podcasts as a more contemporary approach. You more than likely know someone who hosts one. Reach out and see if they’ll have you on.

MESSAGE FOR MARGINALIZED PEOPLE WHO ARE SEX ADDICTS

Roy Kim agreed to have me as a guest because it is rare for someone like me, who identifies as Black and female to admit that she is a recovering sex addict. It is even more uncommon for someone who looks like me to have written an authentic portrayal of the experience. If you’re reading this and know that you have an addiction problem, but you don’t fit the so-called addiction prototype, then know this episode is for you.

I’ve created a page devoted to my guest interviews. If engaging in this type of medium is your thing, then check here toward the end of September to hear a few more.

Listen to SA speakeasy: Episode 24: “In Search of a Salve with K E Garland” via Apple Podcasts

Listen to SA speakeasy: Episode 24: “In Search of a Salve with K E Garland” via Spotify

Pre-order In Search of a Salve.

Monday Notes: Guest Interview on SA SpeakeasyBook Blogger ARC Review (BookZone)Monday Notes: Therapy Every DayMonday Notes: Low-Maintenance vs High-Maintenance RelationshipsWriter’s Workshop: Studying the Craft