A STORY

Don’t think

Walk slow

Stay steady

Focus on steps

Close off sound

Close off smell

Shallow breath

Step into shower

It’s cold

Sharp inhale

Shock

Water warms

Wash hair

Wash body

Then cry

Cry harder

Feel your body

Shaking

Breaking

Washing down drain…

No…

Stop thinking

Feel the water

Stand until

It grows cold again

Step out

Find towel

Dry skin

Dry hair

Brush teeth

Focus on steps

Slide under covers

Cry self to sleep

Wash the poison

From your pillow

Tomorrow

NOTE:

I think the only way I survived my worst days of depression was to shut as much of my internal self down as I could manage. Imagine a machine overheating and what you have to do to cool it down. That’s how I feel when emotions get too intense. My system begins to overheat and melt down.

Shut out the world and do the steps you have to do to survive. Sometimes my brain won’t allow me to shut it down but my body knows the steps now. Breath, shower, cry, sleep. Play the next day by ear.