Scary…But It’s Gotta Be Done

I like to write as most of you have already figured out. If I didn’t, I wouldn’t blog. I wouldn’t write my nonfiction. I wouldn’t write my mysteries. But I like it, so I keep doing it.

I talk to many people who always seem amazed when I release another book. It may be because they are seriously thinking, “Dude, give it up. You’re not that good.” Others may look at it as if it’s an unattainable feat. (Hopefully those people outnumber the others.)

Yes. It takes hard work to write a story. Writing a book isn’t a sprint, it’s a marathon. Just as people train months to run a marathon in the early dewy mornings, late star covered evenings, practically anytime they have a chance to run a few miles. It’s not a task you wake up one day and decide, “today I’m going to run a marathon.” The same can be said with writing a novel. You don’t just wake up and decide to tackle that lengthy beast.

It takes discipline. I spend many evenings behind my laptop instead of watching television. Many late nights I wonder, “why even write?” Isn’t there something better I could be doing with my time? Isn’t there something I could be doing with my limited life?

It takes dedication. When I have those self-deprecating thoughts it would be easy to hit delete. It would be comforting to crawl into bed and sleep away the wasted hours through the years…decades of writing. Yep…decades. It’s hard to believe I remember writing a short story in college…20 years ago. And that short story still pulls at my heart to pull it out and make it better.

It takes stubbornness. Yep. I’m stubborn. No one is going to tell me I can’t do something. I guess that’s the pride in me. To look at them and say, “Look at me now,” when I achieve what they said I couldn’t accomplish. And it just pushes me more. Not to see that look of envy in their eyes, but to see that look that if I can do it, then they can do it.

Writing isn’t a journey meant to be walked alone. During this process I have met other writers and dreamers. I’ve had the privilege of encouraging them to keep at it. I’ve had the honor of reading their manuscripts. I’ve had the joy of sitting across the table from them with coffee and just listening as they tell their story.

So, I’ve entered the scary point in the process of allowing a few people to read the latest book. Waiting for them to say eh or wow. Waiting for a thumbs up or two thumbs down. Waiting for it to be ripped apart or praised.

It’s scary, but important. Very important. I don’t want anything terrible to be released. I want my story to be a page turner. I want the characters to come to life as they have for me. I want the twists to be unforeseen. I want the next twist to be even more unexpected.

So now I wait.

So, I may have a book to release in a few weeks or I may have a book to never see the light of day.

But either way…it all goes back to why do I write?

Not for the fame. Not for the money. Not for the prestige. Not for the recognition. Not for the accolades. Not for the 5 star reviews.

I write because I like it. And I think I was born to do it. There have been stories I have written that will never be released. But I wrote them because I wanted to write them.

And at the end of the day, that is good enough for me.

So for those of you needing a little encouragement…fix your eyes.

You can fix them on anything, but ultimately you get to choose what you fix them on.

If you want to follow a dream, walk with me…I’ll show you where to look.

Peace

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