(½) “The conversations were tense. I remember one time my...

(½) “The conversations were tense. I remember one time my mom threw the phone across the room. So I could tell that the divorce was less than amicable. Dad ended up with holidays and weekends, and Mom was left with the rest of the parenting: homework, drop-offs, pick-ups. But she made it all look easy. Even while working full time as a nurse, she was still that lady that could whip up a meal. We didn’t have any grand traditions or anything, there wasn’t time for that. But we were best friends. She always found ways to be present. We loved to cook together. And she was the one I came to for advice. She always had this way of guiding me to my own conclusions. Whenever there was an issue with a friend, it was never: ‘you’re wrong,’ or ‘they’re wrong.’ She’d try to understand each person’s needs, and would encourage me to find the disconnect. But that empathy didn’t extend to my father, or his new wife Jana. Jana was much younger. And it was difficult for my Mom to see my father move on so quickly. There was clearly a lot of strain, and I felt a responsibility to not like Jana too much, out of respect for my mom. But it wasn’t easy, because Jana made an effort to connect with me from the start. Whenever I went to my dad’s house, she’d sit with me and read stories. We’d make birdhouses together. I remember spa nights with facemasks, and hair curlers. But I knew it was an easy role for her to fill. She got to be the ‘fun stepmom,’ because she never anticipated living with us full time. She was always able to drop us off at the end of the weekend. Then one evening my brother and I were home with my mom, and we heard her calling from upstairs. There was so much fear in her voice. I knew something horrible was happening. When we got to the hospital, the doctors told us that she’d had a brain aneurysm, and the next morning she was gone. Dad and Jana were vacationing in Mexico at the time. And this was pre-cell phone, so there was no way to get a hold of them. Days passed by. It was maddening. And when they finally came back, there was so much confusion. We all moved in together, and everyone was in shock. Nobody knew what to do. It was like: ‘Now what?’”