Wanting Reviews, Dreading Reviews

There is probably no Hell for authors in the next world — they suffer so much from critics and publishers in this one. — C.N. Bovee

So I have an ebook out — maybe you've read me mentioning it before. But that's not what I'm talking about today.

To be an indie author is to learn the true definition of the word "patience." When you're all on your own — without an army of an agent, editors, publishing gurus and paid flackeys backing you up — it's really very easy to lose sight of the main goal and remember why we torture ourselves with this thing called "writing."

Now I don't have an agent. I didn't have access to a paid editor. I don't have access to the kind of funds and support that some people I know do. They won the Find-an-Agent lottery; they found the person who read their writing and wanted to be a part of it. Lots of writers don't have that. I nearly got there numerous times, only to get tossed to the wayside for whatever reason. Neverend wasn't genre-friendly enough, or put into a box as easily as other books. It wasn't the latest flash-in-the-pan story that's hot these days (like paranormal romance or another Harry Potter clone). For whatever reason, I struck out.

So I got tired of the run-around, took a chance, and put the book out on my own. No support. No agents. No publishers. Just me, a word processor, a year and a half of editing and tweaking, some family to help me with the back-end and cover, and now it's out there where anyone can find it. I am not Amanda Hocking or Stephen Leather; I am not going to make a mint anytime soon. I'm in this game for the long haul, and biding my time to see if it withers on the vine or bears fruit naturally.

I also don't have any reviews for the book yet. This is not a post where I excoriate or complain about people buying a cheap book and not taking time to write a review — people can do what they want with my book. If they love it, I hope they enjoy it and they'll recommend it to other people; if they hate it, I'm glad that only had to "waste" $0.99 on it. I gave away over 500 copies of Neverend earlier this week when it was free — if they hated it, they didn't lose a red cent for it.

I also see people I know who have had their stories repped and published professionally, who might already have a half-dozen or more reviews in less time than I've had Neverend out there. Let's cut through the crap for a moment: reviews are something professionally-sold books are given in order to move copies. If more people read favorable reviews, or reviews on book blogs, then there's a better chance of a copy being sold. Reviews are a nice pat-on-the-back, but if you can't be sure where they were generated from, or if they're a result of a free copy and a request, then how do you know what to trust?

Let's be clear, however: this is not pay-for-play; this is not Payola. Reviews are a legitimate, necessary way that this business works, and it IS a business. Do I wish I had reviews? Of course I do! I want to know that something I poured almost two years of my life and hard work into was appreciated by readers.  But do I need reviews to pad my fragile ego? Nope — I'm writing because it's what I love and what I HAVE to do. I could no more stop writing than I could stop breathing, and I'd imagine most writers agree with me on that.

Write your stories because they're what keep you up at night, or because you can't imagine a day going by when you don't put a pen to paper or start clacking keys on a keyboard. If all you're focused on are the approval of others or positive reviews, you'll drive yourself into an early grave or burn out.