Dark, Itchy Shadows
In the beginning, yvonnedesousa.com was designed to be a showcase for my multiple sclerosis humor blog; a means (if you will,) to help me through the obnoxious emotions that came from living with MS.
Then, it turned into a multiple sclerosis/ breast cancer humor blog to help me through the terrifying emotions that came from living through a breast cancer diagnosis.
Of late, it has turned into a multiple sclerosis/breast cancer/hives humor blog to help me through the frustrating emotions three month of hives have brought into my life.
But now I think yvonnedesousa.com has just become a medical mixture of all the things wrong with my particularly, medically bizarre self.
Today’s post starts with a shadow. Or, of course in my case and just too make things interesting, many, many shadows.
Dark, itchy shadows.
You see, I was back at the dermatologist’s office for a follow up appointment regarding the hives. This appt was just after I saw my neurologist for my MS follow up but before I saw the surgeon for my pre-op breast reconstruction surgery part 2.
This, the hives appt, was to confirm what I officially diagnosed myself with as hives, and to see why the allergy regimen wasn’t working. Turns out when I told all of you in the last blog that I’d been diagnosed with hives, I was actually jumping the gun.
The dermatologist never confirmed hives- he just said it was a possibility. He couldn’t tell because he didn’t see any!!!!
How could that be? I was scratching like crazy and my skin had now turned into all different shades of darkened purple, but he didn’t see anything?
What is this patch of itch right here?
Or, how about this patch?
Or this one?
Or this one?
And so on….
“Those spots are not an actual condition,” he told me. “They are just shadows.”
Excuse me?
“You definitely have something going on. Or you did. But what’s left is just the shadow of something, not the actual thing. I can’t diagnose the thing if it’s gone and only the shadows remain.”
“But the shadows still itch like crazy!!!!” I told him.
“Yes, but they are just that- shadows.”
Do you remember in life when you first discovered your shadow and it was cool?
Well, not so much anymore.
My mind turned to songs about shadows.
Me and my shadows, strolling down the avenue
Me and my shadows, not a soul to tell our troubles too
Well certainly, not the dermatologist anyway.
Just a shadow of a doubt
She says it’s keeps me running
I’m trying to figure out
If this really is something
And if it’s not something then why the hell am I still scratching?
We’re running with the shadows of the night.
Baby take my hand, you’ll be alright
Surrender all your dreams to me tonight
They’ll come true in the end.
Wouldn’t that be nice.
My dream is to get rid of the dark, itchy shadows of something, whatever that something may be. Especially in time for my second surgery.
The dermatologist upped the allergy medications and wished me well. He didn’t know if the shadows would complicate the surgery, but he did schedule another post op, post-surgery but before my surgery post op.
Are you still with me?
Are you keeping track of all of this?
Good.
Can you please explain it to me?
But miracle of all miracles, I did get my wish. The hives or whatever have faded to a vague itch here and there. Was it the stronger allergy medications the dermatologist recommended? Was it the very unusual recommendations you, my precious readers, sent me? I don’t know but they have calmed down and I’m super grateful.
And to make things even better, I was able to proceed with the surgery which was way easier than the first one.
I did wake up in the recovery room sneezing like crazy and with a runny nose. Sort of like the sudden cold I get whenever I fly somewhere. For more of the medically bizarre please see this prior post Sniffles Not as Cute as a Hamster
But a cold, though annoying, especially when it comes on so suddenly and lasts for a couple of days, I could deal with. With the itching gone, I was now somewhat at peace.
The surgery was still painful, although not horribly so. I took the prescribed pain medications for 2 days to help the healing process along. On the third day, stricken with intense boredom and tired of reading the Kleenex box, I decided to read the informational newsletter that actually came with the prescription.
Under the section that says ‘Side Effects for Which You Should Call Your Doctor Right Away’ the first listing was-hives.
Yes, that’s right.
I finally know what caused my hives. It was the prescription pain medication.
So what if I didn’t start taking that medication until about 2 weeks after my hives cleared up?
In my bizarre medical world, it makes perfect sense to me.
And, of course, to my shadows.
First song lyric adapted from “Me and Shadow” by Al Jolson, Billy Rose and Dave Dreyer
Second song lyric adapted from “Shadow of a Doubt (Complex Kid)” by Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers
Third song lyric adapted from “Shadows of the Night” by D. L. Byron
